74

Broken, that's how I've felt since Caleb left the room. Everything in my head was spinning and my heart was just beating softly in this deep emptiness of my chest. It wasn't until someone suddenly put their hand on my shoulder that I woke up from my rigid state and winced, trembling.

"Alicia, don't worry, it's me. Caleb said you're not feeling well." Killian crouched down in front of me and looked me in the eyes compassionately while he put his hands on mine protectively.

Of course Caleb meant something like that, but he didn't seem to mention that he was the reason for it. Without taking his eyes off me, Killian gently picked me up and carried me out of the office in his strong arms. I clasped my hands behind his neck and inhaled his scent of lemons deeply while he kept glancing at me worriedly and carefully walking down the stairs to then set me down in front of the shower stall in the bathroom.

"Take a shower. I'll wait for you over there." He stroked my cheek lovingly and when he wanted to pull his hand away, I held it and gave him a firm handshake. I didn't want to be alone, especially not with the prospect of being an outcast and doomed to be lonely in agony. His eyes turned sad and unaware of what had happened between me and his father, he thought I would deal with the situation from the beach. My lips couldn't get a word out, but the mate link could transmit direct thoughts, and that was my only way of communicating with him.

do n't leave me alone

He looked at me wistfully and gently took my face in his hands.

"You'll never be alone again. I promise you," he whispered and then carefully began to take off my wet clothes very slowly and carefully, as if he didn't want to scare me with too quick movements.

I ended up standing naked in front of him and actually that would have been totally embarrassing, but not on this day when everything had changed. I watched him pull himself together to just meet my eyes and then turn away to turn on the water in the shower. Only when the water was pattering down nice and warm did he nod the sign that I could go in.

I padded carefully into the cabin and let the water do its work. While he soaped my back and I watched the dirt disappear down the drain. I couldn't help the fact that I suddenly started to cry bitterly, even though I tried to suppress it for a moment.

He noticed my emotional outburst immediately and despite his clothes came into the shower to take me protectively in his arms. The warm water flowed down on us while I hid my face in his chest and never wanted to leave. Never again did I want to go out into this shitty world that seemed so unfair. Killian pulled me closer and rubbed my back soothingly as I continued to sob and felt like I was about to collapse. After a while he tried to pull away to grab a towel, but I wouldn't let him and pulled him even closer to me.

"Alicia, you need to sleep and process this. I'm not leaving, don't worry." He took my chin with one hand and looked deep into my teary eyes until I nodded at him and let go of him, shaking.

After turning off the faucet, he got out of the shower and took the large towel, wrapped it around my body for warmth and then lifted me back onto my arms. Exhausted, I snuggled up to him and closed my lids, which had become heavy. Half asleep, I noticed that he gently let me down on the bed and then got rid of his clothes. When he then pulled me to his bare chest and the usual security enveloped me, I quickly fell asleep. It was definitely too much stress for such a short day.

KILLIAN

There it lay, broken and just because of me. I just wanted to protect her and had no intention of harming her. I quietly heard her weak heartbeat and blamed myself badly. Why would anyone want to harm her and who were these wolves that they had such vile thoughts about her? How could anyone think badly of her, I wondered, because to me she was like a picture perfect, with her small nose, the slight waves in her brown hair, and the extraordinary color of her eyes that drove me insane. I could look at them for hours and they weren't mate feelings, they only served desire and procreation and I would now pounce on them. my feelings were pure without any ulterior motives and even though she was lying naked next to me that evening, I just wanted to be there for her and didn't waste a single thought on sex. I just wanted to hear her laugh and see the sparkle in her eyes and I closed my eyes tiredly to imagine it all and then fell asleep with a smile next to my little one.

***

A soft knocking woke me from my sleep. Alicia was still lying on my chest, breathing in and out calmly, bringing a brief grin to my lips. As I tried to snuggle up to her, there was another knock that seemed louder than the first.

"I'll be right down," I whispered annoyed, rolling my eyes. I gave the beautiful woman on my chest a loving look one last time, then reluctantly pulled myself out of her embrace. Carefully, trying not to wake her, I placed a pillow in her arms, right where I was lying. After putting on my clothes, I slinked out of the room and angrily stomped down the stairs to where Damiano, Resul, and Caleb were standing at the dining table, staring at me in concern.

"What's going on?" I asked, angry at being taken away from Alicia, scowling at me.

"Sit down, Killian."

Caleb pushed a chair towards me and then sat himself at the head end to wait for everyone to be seated before he began.

"You three have to leave today. It hasn't been years since savages attacked our alpha. That shows they have no respect for you, Killian. It's that girl. You have to go north, maybe someone knew the white wolf, maybe she's even missing," he said calmly and yet there was an order in his words.

I would have loved to throw the table through the window. How could he blame Alicia for my weakness. It wasn't her fault at all, quite the opposite. She brought out my good side and through her I listened more to my heart than to my mind, which had been drummed a lifetime to be a cold strong alpha. A loud growl escaped my throat as I turned back to him.

"If you question my strength one more time, you'll see what an alpha I am, dad. Besides, I won't leave Alicia, not even a second after what happened! What's the point of knowing anyway who was that wolf?" I hissed at him sideways, but he just stood up angrily instead of answering me normally.

"You don't dare growl at me again! Remember your place, Killian! You are the alpha of a pack and it is your duty to find out why they attacked you and Resul! I will take no more arguments. In I'll await your return in a week and I'll take care of Alicia."

Growling, he left the house, followed by Damiano and Resul, who went to pack their things. I was left stunned, wondering how to explain all of this to the broken woman who needed my closeness more than anything after the attack.