78

A new day began again, when I had enough time to stare at the wall and let my thoughts wander. Noah would be sure to do his first round to see if I'd given up the ghost. I felt a little sorry for him. Sure he was worried about me, but I had to rebuild myself before I could cheer him up.

He didn't knock, but the doorbell rang several times. The sound sent a shiver down my spine and made my heart skip a beat. So now I was going to die, probably with Noah, those were my thoughts and they made my hands sweaty.

I walked out of the room and carefully down the stairs and saw Noah creeping out of the living room. He motioned for me to be quiet, as if it would do any good with werewolf ears.

The renewed knock made us both flinch.

"It's me. Open it."

My eyes widened and pure joy shot through me as I realized Resul was at the door. I walked past Noah to open the door and hugged the werewolf tightly. A whiff of my mate's scent clung to his curls, bringing tears to my eyes, but I pulled myself together and pulled away from him, smiling. He looked handsome as ever in his oversized blue t-shirt and short jeans.

"I guess someone missed me," he grinned at me, bringing a good, familiar feeling, if only for a fleeting moment.

"Just don't pride yourself on it." I ruffled his mane wildly and laughed heartily. I hadn't heard it for so long that it seemed strange to me.

"May I come in?" he asked, looking at Noah who was still standing behind me. He nodded and came towards us.

"You two must have a lot to talk about. I'm going to take a little walk," he informed us while taking a sun hat from the small wardrobe and walking past us towards the street.

We looked after him for a moment and then went together into the living room to sit down there. I excitedly sat down in the chair and Resul settled comfortably on the couch where he started wrinkling his nose. It must have been the roses. It was really a pungent smell, but I was used to it.

I leaned forward to get a good look at him.

"How did you find me?" I then asked him without taking my eyes off of him.

"Because I'm smarter than the others. I just can't explain what you're doing here. You're unlikely to have left Killian for Noah." He grinned briefly and then suddenly became serious. "Or does it?"

"I didn't leave Killian, I would never do that to him and what do you mean? Smarter than the others?" I asked and watched him nervously tugging at his t-shirt.

"Well, I'm younger than the others, but just like you, I'm a very observant person. When Killian told me and Damiano what happened, I immediately realized that Caleb must have lied," he said and also leaned forward.

"And by what?"

"Killian said he looked for you all over the house and your suitcases were still there and who leaves without a suitcase? Besides, I'm a good judge of human nature. You didn't leave him alone on the beach, would rather have died with him than to flee and then you let yourself be tagged and run away a day later. It couldn't be any more senseless." He rolled his eyes and then looked at me questioningly.

"What's going on here, Alicia?"

I told him everything I knew. He was on my side, I was sure of that. First Noah's story and then mine. He listened carefully, nodded worriedly, and was stunned by the truth of Linda's death.

Now he knew everything and we sat in silence opposite each other. He thoughtfully looked through the window at the roses and occasionally shook his head slightly. He probably went over everything in his head and found the whole spectacle just as unnecessary as I did.

When the front door opened, we both looked in the direction and Noah broke the silence.

"Killian is searching the whole forest with several pack members," he told us out of breath, and I immediately felt so nauseous that I had to take a deep breath to keep from throwing up on the spot. Resul looked pained too. I felt so sorry for dragging him into everything. The lightness of his character disappeared as more mysteries surrounded him.

"What should we do?" he asked and I heard the concern in his voice, but unfortunately I couldn't take it away from him.

"We could just tell Killian, then he'll know and Caleb will be expelled," he continued, but I immediately took that hope away from him.

"Resul, don't you understand? I'm a half-breed. Caleb has every right to cast me out. No one would argue with him. Besides, he threatened to kill Killian if I said a word to him. I'll definitely risk it Not."

I leaned back in the chair and took a slow breath as Noah sat down next to Resul.

"Then we have to set a trap for him. Caleb will never allow your connection and we can't cast him out, he's the upper alpha after all. We have to create a situation in which Killian is forced to kill him. As hard as it sounds", Noah said and Resul looked at him and nodded.

For the first time I got loud with Noah. I got up angrily and ran back and forth in front of the two.

"Have you gone mad? Killian is supposed to live with such a burden? Having killed his own father? I won't do that to him. There must be another way," I hissed at her, but even as I did it, I did I'm sorry.

"Isn't Killian himself a mongrel, if his mother was one?" Resul interjected, making me think too.

The thought hadn't even crossed my mind, but it wasn't possible.

"I would know right away if he were one. I think you have to have a normal person as a parent to be like me," I then explained to him, not knowing if it was really like that.

We talked back and forth for hours. About letting Killian in, about how far Caleb would go, about running away and about killing Caleb.

It was already dark outside and we still didn't have a solution until Noah had an idea.

"I have a plan to take his rank away. I've never told anyone this and it carries a lot of risks, especially for Linda."

"For Linda?" Resul and I asked at the same time, looking confused at Noah as he stood up and was ready to finish his story.

We eagerly awaited his explanation. My heart was racing with excitement because it was about my mate's mother.

"Linda is not dead but lives in a little house on the beach or rather is forced to stay there. He couldn't kill her no matter how much he hated her. He just wanted to take her far away, away from me, because he couldn't take her love for me. A few weeks after she disappeared he told me the truth and threatened to end her life if I went looking for her. I was too scared that he would carry out his threat, that's why I did never looked for her," he said, bowing his head in embarrassment.

"If we found her, we could call an Alpha meeting and charge Caleb with kidnapping."

I stared at him speechless. That Linda was being held captive somewhere and being blackmailed for such a long time made me so angry it brought tears to my eyes. What kind of person would do that to their mate? There wasn't a spark of love left in this man. He was probably blackmailing her into killing Killian if she escaped. He's already threatened me with my mate's life.

When I was able to organize my thoughts again and the air slowly found its way back into my lungs, my hope immediately vanished.

"But she's a half-breed. He had every right to kidnap her." Exhausted, I held my hands to my head, which was already aching slightly from all the discussions.

"No, he didn't!" Noah suddenly banged the table in anger, making me and Resul jump violently.

"She was tagged, that gave her a rank too. She's above the Alphas because of Caleb's tagging. Her hybrid genes in that position don't matter. She's above the pack, only Caleb has more say than she does."

For the first time since staying here, I had to smile. I suddenly felt liberated. Finally we had at least a plan that might actually work and we would also free Linda. Noah had lived with his guilt for far too long.

"I'll find her and bring her here," I decided without thinking too much about it. The two discussed it with me for a long time, but then had to agree that it would be the most inconspicuous.

Resul would set Killian and the others on the wrong track and Noah would monitor Caleb, that was the plan. On a map, Noah showed me the exact route, or at least the way to where Caleb's vacation home was. He didn't allow Killian to visit him there and that was indication enough that she had to be there.

***

At 4 a.m. the alarm clock rang. The two hours of sleep were far too little, but the excitement kept me awake. Without a car I would probably be on the road for two days and I just wanted to put everything back in order quickly. I collected myself again and, sitting on the bed, went over and over the path in my head and then set out on the journey.

I tried to get to the forest quietly and quickly. Luckily for me, the streets were empty and dark. By the time everyone else was awake, I would have been long over the mountains. I picked a few more rose petals in Noah's garden and rubbed them on myself, I didn't know if it would do anything, but I wanted to at least try.

After transforming at the edge of the forest, I put my clothes in my mouth because I had to take them before anyone would find them. Before I stormed off, I heard a faint crackling in the forest to my right, but it was pitch black and probably just a squirrel or something anyway. Maybe I was just getting a little paranoid. I shook my head and looked ahead into the forest again, only to start sprinting in anticipation.

It was slowly getting dark again. I must have been on the road for 15 hours. A real werewolf would have lasted longer. Sad about my lack of strength, I sat down by a tree and started asking myself a question that had been floating around in my mind for days. Why hadn't Caleb told my mate what I am and saved himself all this circus?

He must have been scared Killian would take off with me. But why should he be afraid of it? He was even willing to kill him, so that was a pointless thought. Another thought then occurred to me and that is that Caleb was certainly believing that Killian would then fight for me and stand against him and then it dawned on me.

He was afraid of his son!

That's why he let me believe my mate would die if I told him anything. Also, my escape allowed him to play the comforting father and still keep Killian under his control, so things went the way he wanted.

I lay there whimpering with my thoughts and staring into the darkness. I used to like being alone and not attracting attention. That night it was like agony that gnawed at my sanity. Every sound startled me. The wind whistling through the trees gave me goosebumps and I quickly realized that I wouldn't be able to close my eyes here.

I decided not to try any further and tiredly got up to walk more hours in the dark.

I just kept walking, my paws digging deep into the forest floor and every shadow terrifying me. When I finally noticed something other than the scent of earth, my eyes widened.

sea-salt

The smell filled my nostrils, urging me to use my last ounce of strength, all for one last sprint before I collapsed. Just as I stepped out of the forest, the sun was rising on the horizon and it just looked beautiful. I dropped onto the sand and gasped for air. My body felt drained and without any effort I let go of my thoughts and fell asleep exhausted.

KILLIAN

Today I would find her for sure, I was absolutely convinced of that. I had to tell myself that over and over again, otherwise there would only be a pile of misery left of me, because without her, I didn't feel whole.

I no longer recognized my reflection. There was nothing left of my alpha radiance. The look no longer menacing, but tired and drained and full of despair. My otherwise graceful posture radiated only torn from. With my shoulders down and my head too heavy to hold up, I stood by the sink and crumbled more and more.

Before I made my way downstairs, I looked at the shower cubicle where I washed her off a week ago and tried to set it up and just be there for her. Why did she just leave me alone and bring me the darkest days of my life. I just didn't get it and had to struggle through each new day without her by my side.

Each step of the stairs was one too many. My legs felt heavy while the weight on my shoulders seemed unbearable. Caleb was there, ready to cheer me up like he does every morning. I was really grateful to him because he was my only support and always gave me little pushes to keep going, not just giving up.

"Are you ready?" He handed me a glass of water while eyeing me worriedly and taking a sip of his own.

"No, I'm scared. The longer we search and the longer we don't find her, the more hope dies in me. I don't want to let it go completely," I said and was immediately startled by the sound of my voice. There was nothing left of my alpha genes. I sounded more like a broken thing that didn't have enough strength to go on.

"Maybe you should wind it up. She left voluntarily and -"

I threw my glass against the wall behind the kitchen in anger and growled at him.

"I will neither graduate nor give up! If you want to continue to support me, then rather help me than say such nonsense!" I stare at him with hatred, feeling the warm drops on my cheeks that I can't hold back.

He raised his hands as a sign that he understood me and then nodded in agreement. I was sorry to take it all on him, but closure was not an option for me, no matter how weak I felt or how hopeless the situation was.

Before I could pick up the shards, the door opened and I looked into Selina's eyes in amazement, who pushed the door shut behind her and just stood there. I didn't expect her, because Damiano and Resul actually wanted to pick me up right away.

"Hello Killian." She slowly walked towards me and gave a fleeting wave to Caleb, who was standing behind me, looking at her as questioningly as I did. She gave me a warm hug, which I didn't return. I just wanted to know what she wanted and that she would be gone afterward. She hesitantly pulled away from me, looking deep into my eyes as she said what made my alpha return.

"I saw her. This morning at the edge of the woods. She looked really emaciated and smelled like roses. She-"

"After roses...", I interrupted her and the anger rose in my stomach, then in my throat and a menacing growl escaped me.

"Noah!" I hissed and clenched my teeth as I turned to my father, who stared at us both dead in my tracks and said nothing more. I turned back to Selina and tried to get past her to the front door, but she excitedly held me back by my shirt.

"Wait," she asked me in a high voice, but I looked at her menacingly and tore myself away from her. I just wanted to go to this murderous scum that already had my mother on her conscience. He'd tell me where Alicia was if it was the last thing he said.