54

LONDON

I sobbed to sleep alone. Maybe I deserved it.

It broke my heart to lie to Striker. It broke my heart to see him leave. I just thought I was doing him a favor. My mess with my father was our mess alone. Striker didn’t have to be involved with this.

I didn’t know what came to me, but it had to be done. I wouldn’t give my father any more satisfaction in using us to get what he wanted. He wouldn’t get anything from us anymore.

“If your dad doesn’t pay the amount I asked, I will send him your fingers one by one.” This nightmare would end me up in the mental hospital.

I woke up in the middle of the night to the same voice over and over again. I wiped my hand across my forehead to get rid of the sweat. I caught my breath and left my room for a glass of water.

Right now, I had to be strong. No one was here to help me anymore. I pushed him away—I pushed away the last man who cared for me.

I poured myself a glass of water when I realized someone was watching me that had me yelping. I almost dropped the glass.

“I’m sorry I don’t mean to startle you.” Reed looked like he had just woken up.

“You want something?” I drank the water empty and left it in the sink.

“I heard footsteps.” I knew he had a gun behind him as he pulled his shirt down. “I thought to check it out.”

“It was me. I ran down to get a glass of water.”

“Are you okay?” I was touched, he asked me, but this didn’t concern him anymore.

“I’m fine. Thanks.” I walked to the door, but he was standing right where I wanted to pass.

“If you need anything, I’m here.”

“I’d rather talk to my therapist because she’s paid to keep it to herself. While you, on the other hand, my words might just spread all over the globe.”

“What do you mean?”

I met his gaze. “Do you also report my intimate moments with Cade?”

“Excuse me?” He looked shocked and offended.

“Don’t give me that look.”

“I’m sorry, London, but why would I watch you—”

“Not exactly watch, but your job is to keep me safe. I suppose you saw the whole thing.”

He laughed. When he noticed I was not amused, he stopped. “You got it all wrong, woman. I only report to your father if he asks me, but not to the extent even your private moment. Other than that, my job is only to keep an eye on you, and your personal life is none of my business, but I do check who you meet to ensure they’re not the bad guys. I never watched you and Cade doing whatever you two did. That’s an invasion of privacy.” He grimaced. “And creepy.”

“Then stop reporting to my father. I will pay your salary.”

“Sorry, London, but I already have an employer.”

“Just get out of my way.”

When he moved to the side, I walked away.

“I’m a friend, London. If you wanna talk—”

“Go back to sleep, Reed.”

***

I woke up to an empty bed, no warm hug, no soft kisses on my neck, and no sneaky hand waking me up in the morning.

It hadn’t been twenty-four hours. I had already missed Striker.

The room fell silent as I sat in my bed. I checked my phone. I found no messages from him. He was true to his words—he left me alone. Well, this was my doing, so I just had to suck it up—quid pro quo.

I called Neke to say that I would be reporting late. I had to see someone I had not seen in a long time.

“I was surprised to see you on the list today.” She had a note and a pen ready every time we had our session, but that was a year ago when I stopped seeing her. Don’t get me wrong, she was good at her job, but I felt like I was holding back. “How have you been?”

I drew a deep breath as I sat in front of my therapist. “I had closer to a perfect life last week.”

“Tell me about it?”

“Well, I got married.” I smiled sadly as I played with my rings.

“Congratulations.”

“It was an intimate wedding. I always dreamed of it. He gave me exactly what I wanted. It was perfect. He’s a good person.” I looked down at my finger. “It was just for a wrong reason. I feel like I keep him on a short leash. And that’s not what marriage is all about. Marriage is about partnership, trust, love, understanding, and respect.”

“Can you tell me more?”

“We’re tied to someone that only wants to break us apart. I can’t do that to him.”

“What made you say you keep him on a short leash?”

“I don’t know. Everything just happened so fast.”

“Do you think he is that person?”

“No.” I shook my head. “He’s a man of his own. He is responsible, loyal, and trustworthy but also selfless. That’s what I’m afraid of. He will give me everything that I ask.”

“What are you so afraid of, London?”

“That I will be the one to ruin our marriage.”

“All you have to do is sit down and tell him everything. Good talk is always one way to settle an issue. If you trust him enough, you can work things out together.”

“That’s what I’m scared of.”

“London, you know you have to trust your partner. Whatever this wrong reason you mentioned, you can still make it right. Marriage is about give and take. That’s why you married that person because you wanna share a life with him. If he is worth it and you know your worth in this relationship, whoever gets in the middle won’t succeed.”

After that talk, I told Reed to drive to the firm.

“Just say it.” I couldn’t help but notice Reed frequently checked me through the rearview.

“You know, when I was a kid and fought with my big brothers, I always went to my ma. When my younger brother and I got into a fight, I called my big brothers.”

“You’re point?”

“I will always run to the person I trust the most.”

I looked away. “You’re right. Right now, nothing works for me—”

“That’s not true, London. You’re a strong and sensible woman. You work hard to achieve your objective. You never stop doing something good for the people around you. What made you stop fighting for you and Cade?”

I glared at him. “What made you say that?”

“Well, I may be just your bodyguard, but my job made me the most observant. You don’t go to your house without calling Cade. You’re always excited to see him. When he came yesterday, and he immediately left with a look on his face as if someone had just stabbed him in the back while he carried the world over his shoulder, I knew something had gone wrong. Cade was so worried when he couldn’t reach you. You could use my phone to call him but chose not to. He didn’t come back. So I guess you two had an argument. A big one.”

“Maybe you should just stick to protecting my ass.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“And you are not just my bodyguard. You’ve been there for me in my ups and downs. At least we formed a bond. You’re a friend, Reed. Do you think I trust you with my life because you’re getting paid to do that? No. I trust you because you’re a good and reliable person.”

“Thank you.”

“Thank you for giving me the space I needed last night.”

“You’re welcome.” He parked the car in front of the firm.

I got out and told him that I was going alone.

“Are you sure?”

“I know most of these guys. They will protect me if someone wants to stab me in the back.” I rolled my eyes. “Find the nearest cafe and get a coffee or something.”

“I’ll stay.”

“Whatever.” I entered the building.

It was still fresh to me coming here two years ago. I stayed here for a few days because I felt safe around Linden, the only person I could trust since Striker left. Those were my darkest days. I thought I had lost a reason to live, but somehow I managed to rise from the fall and saw the light ahead.

The windows and door to his office were glasses so he would see before someone could enter. He looked surprised to see me since I came unannounced.

He was already walking to the door to open with his familiar smile. “Hey, sweetheart. What a surprise?” He pulled me into a hug.

“Good to see you.” I put the best smile on my face. “Busy?”

“Not for you. Wanna come, or you wanna go and get a coffee?”

“I won’t be long.” I went to the chair while he was just standing there. I suddenly felt like he knew something, considering that I came alone. “I know, you know, Linden.”

He shut the door closed and the blind as he took a deep breath before he spoke. “Why did you do that, sweetheart?”

“I can’t fool him. He’s such a good person.”

“Cut the crap, sweetheart. I know you through and through. Like right now. You just lied to me. You’re not that person who intentionally hurts the person you love.”

“What made you think I love him?”

“I know the moment he had you in his arms. I’m a good judge of character, London. You’re not that person Cade told me last night.” Just hearing his name felt like stabbing myself in the chest.

My own doing was backfiring so quickly. Karma is really digital nowadays.

“I’m a good actress. I could win an Oscar if I tried my luck in Hollywood.”

“Well, keep that up.” He sat on his chair. His tone filled with disdain. “Why are you here?”

“I wanna know if you make any progress with finding out about Ivy.”

“I’m sorry, but I can’t share that kind of information with you. I only do that to my client.”

My brows furrowed. “Linden.”

“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I do my job diligently, including keeping my work classified.”

“Fine.” I rose from the chair. “It’s a mistake coming here anyway.” I was walking toward the door when he called my name.

“Tell me if you never cared for Cade, even just a little.”

“I didn’t.” I swallowed hard.

“You’re not a good liar.”

I turned around. “Maybe you’re just bad at reading people.”

“First, I’ve seen that look in your eyes before. You are sad, sweetheart. Miserable. You may come here to get an update, but you could have just called or emailed me if you wanted nothing more. I only mentioned his name, but it felt like a stab to your heart, wasn’t it? You quickly dropped your gaze. You can easily tell without that pain if you never care about Cade, but you felt like you betrayed and stabbed your own husband with his knife.”

I wiped my tears. I didn’t know they fell until they tickled my jaw.

“Tell me, how am I doing so far?”

I sniffed, and my tears kept coming.

“What’s going on, sweetheart? I swear I won’t tell Cade you dropped by, but you have to tell me something?”

“I can’t.”

“Then I can’t help you. I’m sorry you came here for nothing. And if you came here for my sympathy, I don’t have one.” He huffed. “You know what? I’m not doing that again. It’s getting old, and I’m sick of being used to being the bridge between two stupid people. On the other hand, you might be getting what you wished for sooner than you expected.”

“What? What do you mean?” My heart nearly stopped.

“Well, he just hired a lawyer to process the divorce you asked for.”