068

Erin got back before we wrapped it up, before I was dressed again, and she also commented on my butt plug. I'd forgotten about it once more.

"Ignore it, Erin. She's just preparing her ass so Tanner can fuck her there." They kissed, reminding me they loved each other.

"Oh." Nothing more, just an 'oh' because it was somehow so commonplace. I got dressed and we started looking through Suki's sketches.

"These are beautiful, Brooke," Erin said. "You could do this for a living. They pay live models $200 an hour for your time."

"What, nude? I'm worried about my face and body showing up now in someone's home now. If every person in an art class was drawing me, I'd be everywhere."

"So?" Erin said.

"It's embarrassing to think my nude body is going to be hanging in someone's house. That people can stare at me in all my naked glory, maybe masturbate to me or something. It's why I don't want my face in the picture. If people could actually recognize who I was, I'd be mortified."

"So? Glory is the key word there. You're glorious, and certainly don't have anything to be ashamed of. I'd love a body like yours," Erin replied.

"You have a great body, tall, athletic, strong."

"My tits are too small. Yours are perfect. Besides, I've done nude modeling. It's no big deal."

"You and Suki have sex with other people. We're not the same."

"I'd love it if you were."

"Tanner said he'd be interested in a threesome with another woman," Suki said, "but Brooke doesn't do girls and Tanner doesn't do boys, so both will end up disappointed."

"I don't really want another man either," I said, "not just another girl. Two seems right to me when it comes to sex. Three seems too many."

"You should really do one of these for your portfolio, Suki," Erin said. "These are great and might get you some more work in faces and figures, expand your work past landscapes and still lifes."

"Would you and Tanner object to doing one for myself to add to my portfolio?" Suki asked.

"I suppose it would be okay if it followed the same guidelines and didn't show my face when I'm nude."

"Wonderful. Why don't you take pictures of these sketches and you and Tanner pick out those I can start work on. I have to finish my commission first, and I'll do Tanner's next."

Shooting the sketches on my phone, I took pictures of each while Erin was holding it up for me.

When I had them all, Suki showed me the three she'd most like to do for her patron. One of them had me lying on the couch. My head was bent back and my arm was flung over my face. My legs were slightly parted, clearly showing my sex and my breasts were both visible. It was a beautiful picture, but one of those which exposed more of me than most of the others.

Another one had me standing and was from behind me. My legs were slightly apart, but all I exposed was my buttocks and back with a hint of the side of a breast. My head was turned down and to the left, but my hair cascaded down masking my face. Since it showed less of me than the many of the others, it was the one I would have picked. In the last one, I was turned more to the side, so my left breast was visible, as were my back and butt. My right hand was on my ass and my head was turned that way so my face was behind my head and hair again. It would have been my second choice of the three.

Suki thanked me for helping her out and I hugged both before heading home. I stopped at a Thai restaurant as I wouldn't have time to cook, remove my plug and shower before Tanner got home and most of our leftovers were used last night.

After eating, I showed Tanner the pictures explaining which three Suki was most interested in using, pointing to the one I liked most. Instead of picking either of those I was most interested, he picked the one of me lying down with my sex exposed. Once again, he surprised me with his willingness to share the intimate details of my body, but I didn't need the Louvre speech again, so I didn't say anything.

For himself, he picked one of me standing, facing the artist. My feet were about a shoulders width apart and I was standing hipshot, my weight on one leg more than the other. My sex and face were both visible and I had a look of defiance or indifference on my face as if I was daring anyone to comment on my nudity. It was a great picture, but showed far too much of me considering you could clearly see it was me.

"Where do you think you're going to hang this, Tanner?"

"In the study, or maybe our bedroom."

"Everyone can tell it's me."

"It's our picture in our house, not hanging in someone else's house or a museum."

"If it's in our study or bedroom, other people will see it. You'll be showing your naked wife to whoever sees it. People go into your study all the time, and don't give me the Louvre explanation. It might have worked on our honeymoon where no one else knew me. People who know me will see it in our house. They will know it's me and what my naked body looks like. Your friend Geoff will see it. It's hard enough keeping his hands off me now without showing him my naked body. I can see him now masturbating to images of that picture stuck in his demented little head."

"He probably masturbates to you in a swimsuit. What difference does it make if it's you in a swimsuit or you naked?"

"You're not making me feel better, Tanner. I don't want him masturbating to me at all, under any circumstances, but seeing me naked will make it seem a whole lot worse. We can't be responsible for what's in his twisted brain, but I don't need to feed it either. You know every one of my girlfriends had to quit dancing with him because he was putting his hands on them. He got handsy with me, putting his hand just above my ass instead of my waist. I don't know why he's your friend."

"Because we've known each other since grade school."

"That's not a very good reason for excusing most of his behavior."

"If he gets fresh with you, tell me. I'll make him stop."

"I shouldn't have to tell you he's getting fresh. He shouldn't do it if he's your friend. If he does it anyway, I don't see how you can keep calling him a friend."

"We'll hang it in our bedroom then. Geoff rarely goes in there."

"Which is not the same as never goes in there. It wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't so clearly me. Can't you pick another one?"

"I like this one the best."

"It's a great picture, Tanner. I like it myself, but I don't want to be showing myself nude to all your friends."

"Are you ignoring the fact you're nude for your friend doing the paintings?"

"No, but she's a woman and she's seen me naked before, in the locker room. It's not the same."

"A woman and a lesbian. Are you so sure she isn't masturbating to images of you right now?"

That shut me up. Would Suki masturbate while picturing me naked? I guess it could be happening. Or Suki and Erin could be making love while they both imagined my naked body. Did it bother me? A little, maybe, but not nearly as much as Geoff's smirking face beating his meat while he imagined me nude. Was it sexist of me? Thinking Suki didn't make as much difference as Geoff did? Then realized it wasn't about gender, it was about Geoff. Stan had seen me naked, had even watched me masturbate and get fucked. If he was thinking about me now and masturbating, it wouldn't bother me nearly as much as if it were Geoff.

"No, it's mostly Geoff. If Stan were masturbating to images of me naked, I wouldn't care as much as if it were Geoff."

We argued about it for several more minutes, but eventually, I acquiesced to his desire to have this one. It was another by-product of my blackmailer. I felt guilty for what was happening, what I was doing outside of my marriage, and as a result, I didn't want to deny Tanner anything if he wanted it bad enough. Knowing my blackmailer was going to fuck my ass meant I wanted to give it to Tanner first. I'd given my oral virginity to my blackmailer before my husband, and I didn't want him to have my anal virginity first. If we couldn't stop him before the time came to give him my ass, I'd let Tanner have me first.

He chose the picture of me from the rear for Suki's portfolio picture, I think as a sop to me for picking the other one for our house. It wasn't enough to make me feel better. If he didn't care enough about me not to show my naked body to anyone who showed up at our house, maybe I should take a job as a nude model and let everyone have my naked body hanging in their house. It felt too much like biting off my nose, so I let the impulse die.

Tanner tried to have sex with me after, but I wasn't in the mood. I wasn't totally enraged, but I wasn't much in a loving frame of mind either.

Before he went to sleep, he told me he was playing racquetball tomorrow afternoon.

"Fine. I'm going over to Tiffany's anyway." I turned over and went to sleep.