Chapter 291
“What makes you think I care? I can ignore you.”
“Can you? I can be really invasive when I want to be, and we both know you hate distractions when working the floor. Besides, you cried when you thought I was dead. I know you care and you’re still here, so I have more leverage than I thought I did.” Smirking like a smug deviant, but I’m not caving that easily. Even if he is right.
“I cry when I break a nail, dahling. Really doesn’t hold much weight. And I’m only still here as I love my job and wasn’t really in the mood for a new start. It was cold out.” It’s an attempt to dodge what he already knows, and he is clearly not buying it.
“You care about me, even if you can’t admit it. Last night said it all and I’m not about to back down and act like I didn’t tell you how I felt. You’re right, I’m a dog with a bone when I want something and it’s your company tonight, whether you agree or not. So, don’t count on getting any work done.”
Hardly the most romantic of propositions from a bossy sod with his mind set on what he wants, but what do I expect? It’s him after all.
“Is this the arrogance I can expect from now on? Thinking you know what’s going on in my head and using it to bully your way through?”
“I’m not bullying, I’m giving you the option. Date or stalker … it’s that simple.” He grins at his own deviousness and all I can do is exhale heavily, glance heaven wards for strength and accept the inevitable. He was never easy to live with before and now he will simply be the same unbearable brute, except with his mind set on pushing me to spend time with him. I think I liked him more when he spent half his life avoiding me.
“Okay! You’re not funny you know, even if you think you are.” I almost snap it at him, frustrated that he knows how to corner me and harass me into shit when I still feel all messy brained. I’m useless.
“That’s a matter of opinion.”
I don’t even dignify that with a response, just straight to my demands to regain a little control here.
“Not a restaurant or anywhere where you have fucked the staff.” I raise a brow at him sarcastically, looking for a little bad mood to wound that cocky attitude and this time it pulls a heavy exhale from him. He’s not amused with the dig but it’s not sparking a fight either. He just looks slightly irritated.
“That wasn’t intentional. I was trying to let you in on parts of me that no one else gets to see and it backfired. So, nowhere that I have any ties, past or present. Understood.”
That surprises me a little, but I don’t dwell on it. I should remember how good he is at coercing you to feel what he wants you to feel.
“Yeah, well, I would rather not have some scrawny old conquest salivating over you and ruining my food. I’m also in no mood for dressing it up and acting proper. I want to chill a little tonight and get my head back together, so make plans on those details.” If he expects me to cuddle up all smiles and charm and act like an amorous date, he has another thing coming. He wants to pursue me, then he can deal with whatever mood comes with him pushing me into it. I will also not be putting on a face, heels or a dress and he can deal with a casually attired woman who can’t be arsed with five-star behaviour and multiple cutlery. I need simplicity tonight.
“So where to?” Alexi glances back over his shoulder and I know he’s probably getting antsy that he needs to go. Mico out there with the car running already, no doubt. Waiting patiently because he is a gem who seems happy to see us working things out. Alexi only likes to be late when it is of his choosing.
“I don’t know. I have never actually been on a real date in my life. Maybe something normal, like average people do, and not flights to Miami to hang out in billionaire nightclubs where you have the urge to beat people.” I smirk at that little dig and get a full-blown smile right back at me, dimples and all, which do funny things to my insides. No remorse whatsoever at me bringing up that little black mark against him. Not that he has ever explained that night, and that’s still a conversation to be had.
“So, no violence, sex buddies, flashing the cash and extravagant venues? Leave it with me. I really need to go.” He leans in surprisingly fast and plants a chaste kiss on my cheek that startles me. I hate that he ignored all my veiled attempts at getting a rise out of him and threw them off with humour and nonchalance. No rising to my bait and showing his mean side.
Dickhead.
He doesn’t wait around though, just a wink and a cheesy, satisfied smile and he’s off, rushing out the door like a man on a mission, and I’m left hanging in the hall wondering how the hell he just coerced me into spending time with him on a date, even while telling myself I needed time out. Or that I’m left gawping after him, feeling disappointed and listless because he is leaving me here.
Arsehole.
He simply storms in and takes over everything, and it is annoyingly effective. He truly is like a tornado who just sweeps through and leaves everything in carnage.
I’m not prettying myself up, wearing something sexy or doing anything to make him think he has earned anything from me. I want food, time out of this building and then I will come home, ditch him in the living room and go to work. If he thinks anything beyond that is happening, he can go find someone else to fuck. I won’t care …
Much.
Okay, that’s a lie. I will care and probably stab him and her to death with my stilettos should he be that stupid.
Until I suss him out a hell of a lot more and pull apart any ulterior motives in his decision that I am what he wants, then he’s getting nothing in return. Nothing. Nada. Zilch. Not a damn thing.
My presence, my company, but fuck all else until I get my bearings and figure out if he truly is being honest with me. The second he makes me uncomfortable or shows any hint of screwing with me, I’m gone.
His club, his apartment, all of it. I will leave it all behind without a second thought to save myself.
I’m not playing stupid this time and gambling with my heart. I won’t allow myself to get to that point of desperation where I feel I have no other choice than putting his gun to my head.
“You okay?” Jackson's voice startles me from behind and I turn to meet that happy, loving face coming towards me down the hall. My gentle giant, the carer and protector I would be lost without nowadays. He is the mood lightener I need in Alexi’s absence.
“Just fine.” I throw him my genuine big, warm smile and slide my arm into his when he’s next to me. The calm to my day and someone I never have to dissect or second guess. His only motives in life are doing his job, which is keeping me safe and angling to go for food at every opportunity.
“You want to go out before tonight starts?” He asks his usual daily question as we have got into a routine of going out for some shopping or sorbet to escape this place for an hour or two before show time. I have come to depend on my little Jackson time outside of ‘Carreroland’. The boy just wants treats.
“I suppose a little shoe shopping couldn’t hurt. Maybe pick up an ice-cream or two.” I grin when his face lights up like the proverbial puppy dog he can be. Jackson loves nothing more than junk food, and I long ago learned that if you ply him with it before the shopping excursion, then he will happily sit for as long as he takes to eat it while I shop in peace.
“Lead the way Lady Camilla. I heard they have two new flavours this week at Ample Hills Creamery to try.” He knows it’s my favourite parlour in Midtown Manhattan and is close to some of my usual boutiques. Killing three birds with one stone. Satisfying my shopping and junk food cravings and taking my mind off Master Carrero and tonight’s date.
“Okay but we can’t have a long outing today, I have dinner with our lord and master before the club opens.” That doesn’t leave me long to go out, come back to oversee prep and get ready. It’s just as well I’m putting no effort into the date then, isn’t it?
He nods and mock bows, not even blinking that I would have plans with Alexi, before leading the way to the elevator so I can hop upstairs for my bag and jacket and it puts me in a much better mood.
Maybe giving me Jackson as my shadow and personal bodyguard wasn’t the worst thing Alexi could have done for me. He chose someone sweet, patient and trustworthy. A big cuddly bear who would take a bullet for me, and again, it adds to the level of honesty in what Alexi says he feels for me.
He is always protecting me, and he picked Jackson based on what he thought I needed, not just an intimidating silent bodyguard who keeps me under lock and key. He gave me someone to trust, someone to call a friend. A reason to feel less alone in his big old empty club and someone to rely on when he was not here to keep watch himself. Alexi always has reasons behind every choice he makes, and I’m seeing the evidence of his care in the choices he made for me on my return.
Maybe he isn’t so bad, and tonight I should give him a little benefit of the doubt. Lighten up a little and take each hour as it comes. Maybe turn down the frosty dial, relax and try to have a little fun. Stop overthinking and start paying attention to the small details that tell me he has a heart after all.
