Chapitre 4
My heart froze in my chest and panic crawled up my bones. Did they find out? Everyone started looking around.
"The others can go, except for Dan van Eschwald!" Delta ordered Ivan. I couldn't move at his words, unlike the other wolves who slowly made their way towards the big tents.
"Oh man, good luck Dan. I'll save you a bed," Luke said from behind me before joining the crowd. The seat kept emptying. General Astor's searing gaze slowly but surely glowed into my soul. My heart raced as I wanted to turn it over and transform and run away, but I couldn't run away and I couldn't transform.
"Come on, Dan van Eschwald!" Delta Ivan ordered, and my legs, which felt like rotten branches, moved of their own accord. Was it over now? My Adam's apple seemed to have swollen to the size of a real apple, the one in my throat stuck.
Fear flooded my lungs the closer I got. The sharp looks pierced me like daggers. My knees were so weak that I could hardly stand up. My neck had to stretch out as the warriors were quite a bit taller than me.
Delta Ivan looked down at me as if I were an eyesore on the ground he stepped on. I didn't dare look at General Astor. Still, a scent of strength and nature surrounded him. My mind raced while my heart ran a marathon.
"Do you know why you had to stay here?" Delta asked Ivan and I shook my head. "Edgar here said you don't have a wolf. Is that true?"
His voice was stern, leaving no room for pity.
"Yes, Delta Ivan."
My voice cracked under the tension.
I have sworn to Alpha Udyr that in every family without exception a man will be trained as a warrior, in both human and wolf form. The latter is not possible with you."
My wolf internally growled at those words, but I just looked down at the dusty ground. Now he would call me a disgrace. Luckily he hadn't done it in front of the other wolves. But Delta Ivan wasn't done yet.
"I have discussed with General Astor that you will take on more work here in the camp as a replacement. You'll do just as much as the others."
I looked up and back and forth between them in surprise. where was the shame General Astor's eyebrows were drawn together so hard they pointed downward like an arrow. He wasn't amused. I swallowed.
It shouldn't bother me, but his gaze hurt me. I wanted to say that I wasn't a man and that I had a wolf and that I was normal, but I couldn't.
I could only be silent and bow.
Slowly the voices of the new soldiers, all wearing the same spruce-green uniform, echoed across the square.
"Now go and hurry if you want some more food," Delta Ivan said, gesturing towards the tents. My eyes widened at the mention of food. I hastily bowed and began my way through the masses of wolves .
Some looked at me with smirks, others ignored me completely. I struggled through the current, dodging the shoulders that came at me. In the hierarchy, my height condemned me to the bottom. Some groups had already formed and I already felt like an outsider.
I broke through the crowds and ran to one of the big sleeping tents. I pushed the curtain aside and entered.
Narrow bunks were set up along the tent wall on either side. Travel bags were already on most of them and two wolves were still standing on the other side.
One of them was Luke.
Relief washed through my veins and I crossed the aisle on my way to him. He turned to me and smiled at me.
"Here, I've reserved an extra seat for you," he said, pointing to a cot on which a green uniform was still folded.
"Thanks Luke, you're the best," I replied before eyeing the wolf standing on the other side. He was tall. Some wrinkles showed age on his face. His black hair had tanning in places mixed with little gray and yet he radiated a strength and wisdom that many of the young wolves here did not possess.
"Ulf, this is Dan. We met on the square. Ulf here was a tracker before he was drafted."
True to his word, Ulf wore a strong smell of earth mixed with that of other wolves... The uniform hid a more specific reading.
"I'm very pleased, Dan."
"My part, Ulf," I replied and gave him my hand. He took it and shook it once.
"Now we should hurry before we run out of food," Luke said, looking at me expectantly. I looked at the uniform and cold sweat formed in my palms.
"You don't have to wait for me. Go ahead," I said, pointing to the exit. "I'll be right behind you."
Luke gave me a critical look for a moment before nodding. "All right, we'll reserve a seat for you."
"Thanks Luke," I replied as the two headed off to eat. I sighed with relief when I had the whole tent to myself. Changing clothes could be a big problem later.
I let the bag fall off my shoulder onto the bunk. Then I took the uniform, which turned out to be a one-piece suit. I took one last quick look around before changing as quickly as I could.
"Damn," I mumbled.
As expected, the uniform was much too big for me and I had to turn it inside out a few times on the arms and trouser legs. After all, she hid my figure.
"There is only one size."
I stumbled back in shock and landed rather inelegantly on the tent floor. How did I not hear someone come in? I knew immediately who it was from the smell.
General Astor.
He was only a few meters away from me. His facial expression hadn't improved. The eyebrows were still down as if he knew exactly what I was hiding. He kept walking towards me.
I swallowed. It never crossed my mind to get up off the floor.
"How old are you, Dan?" he asked sharply. I thought for a moment, finally deciding on the truth.
"Nineteen, General Astor."
He leaned back and closed his eyes. His face smoothed. I could only stare at him in amazement and pretend his presence didn't bother me.
"You know, it's amazing. I know a little about astronomy and nineteen years ago there was no lunar eclipse," he said, his deep voice vibrating through my body. Icy shock made my heart stop.
"No?" I asked puny. He opened his eyes again and the beautiful brown was completely fixed on me.
"No. You might have fooled Ivan, but that doesn't apply to me."
He kept walking towards me and my heart was beating so fast my ribs were pounding. I pushed myself back on the ground as far as I could until I was leaning against the tent wall. There was no escape now.
I wasn't even here a day and my cover was blown.
"There was a lunar eclipse 17 years ago and another 21 years ago. Now tell me Dan, what are you trying to hide. Why do you want to hide your wolf?"
His gaze was so intense that I couldn't break my gaze.
"If you want to survive the day, you immediately answer my questions: Who are you really, where are you from and what are you doing here?"
His voice feigned calm, but beneath it was a threat that burned itself into my memory and immediately smothered any thoughts of lying. I got nothing out. Fear barred the door to words. General Astor didn't seem to like the insubordination.
There wasn't a spark of warmth in his eyes, only distrust and coldness. In a flash he picked me up by the collar of my uniform and I lost the ground under my feet.
An excited squeak escaped me.
General Astor froze. I slapped both hands over my mouth as if to retrieve the sound, but it was too late. His brown eyes widened with clear realization. He immediately let go of me and I landed awkwardly on my feet in front of him.
He knew it.
Panic zigzagged inside me, pumping fresh energy into my legs as if running away was a way out. Completely frozen I waited for a reaction. I saw the battle of thoughts on his face as if he was trying to make sense of this, me.
Slowly he leaned forward and by reflex my head tilted to the side. A tingle ran down the vulnerable skin of my throat as I felt his hot breath against it. I waited, terrified, for General Astor to smell my scent.
He sat back and his eyes hardened. Cold sweat ran down my back. I looked up at him pleadingly, but his eyes had left me and rested on my bag. In two long steps he had overcome the distance and rummaged in my things.
"Hey, no!" I yelled, tugging at his uniform, but General Astor didn't move an inch. He threw the packet of biscuits onto the bunk, and before a second he was holding the glass bottle with the green contents in his hands.
He pulled the cork and sniffed the mixture, which masked my natural scent. I could only watch as he destroyed any chance of secrecy. Fresh tears pooled in the corners of my eyes.
would I die now
General Astor turned back to me. My eyes were on his boots, polished clean. He came back towards me and I crouched down.
He knew it.
I couldn't prevent it anymore. Tears of fear rolled down my cheeks and trickled down my chin.
"You're not a wolf," he said, and to my amazement his voice had lost some of the cold now that he knew I wasn't a man.
I guess I should be glad that his wolf hadn't taken control yet...
"Look at me."












