Chapter 57

Chapter 57

I stared at him dumbfounded, as his jacket sagged against my shoulders, and he swung me around, his eyes fixed on my ripped dress. He buttoned me into his jacket without glancing at me, as he put my arms through it with determined fingers. To ensure that no one else saw what was intended exclusively for him, he covered my flesh, hiding the traces of what we had done. As he ran his hands over the material, folding over the extra-long fabric at the ends of my arms, I remained motionless.

He kept taking care of me, and I kept breaking his heart, so it was a tragic game.

"I will take you back to your apartment.“ With confidence, he spoke and then stepped past me, letting his body slide against mine as he unlocked the door for me.

As he waited for me to move, I could feel his rage pounding against my chest, so I did the only thing I could: I fell into step behind him.

On our way out, Derrick steered clear of the ballroom, since it wouldn't have been just to the people who didn't know what I had done. He was cold and harsh.

He unlocked the door for me and waited for me to enter the limousine, which was already waiting for us. He hesitated for a second outside, and I wondered if he would abandon me in this state –after all, this was what I deserved–but he took a seat just as I was about to believe he would slam the door in my face.

As I felt the engine kick off and the car start to move, I couldn't help but feel stung by his decision to sit as far away from me as possible. The shame I felt for this evening was choking me on the quiet ride back. I had managed to spoil the beautiful date that he only wanted to take me on.

It's okay–“You don't have to apologize.“ With grit in his voice, he interrupted me.

Dieses time, I damaged him too much by going too far for him. He was silent to me, his eyes fixed on the scenery outside his window, even though his anguish was building inside of me and his fury was a maelstrom of ideas.

I was too scared that he would reject me, like I had done to him, that I would step closer to him and press myself up against his chest.

"I want you to know that it has never been my intention to hurt you.“ There was urgency in my quiet voice.

While he was still upset with me, I didn't want to leave his side.

I was just a woman going insane and a wolf going crazy because I was caught between her mistakes and her decisions.

"I just don't know what to do.“ I put my palm to my mouth to stop the sob from spilling out, but my body was fracturing with the words.

I didn't want him to feel sorry for me or realize how genuinely shattered I was, but the truth was that I was a collapsing structure with cracks coming out of every part of me. In the end, I would be left alone, and maybe that's what worried me the most: No one to pick up my broken pieces or hold me upright.

Now that the car had stopped, he decided to say something.

"When you figure out what you want to do, you'll know where to find me.“ Even though they were breaking him, his words were gentle, with a weariness that permeated every syllable and pounded my heart.

He was sick of my immaturity and the childlike behavior that accompanied the age difference between us, and the longer I made him wait for me, the greater the likelihood that he would give up on us being a couple.

The thought of it caused a sharp pain in my chest, and I never wanted to see the lifeless expression in his eyes again. When the driver opened the door for me to depart, he didn't glance at me; the silence that resulted from his lack of acknowledgment pulsed with coldness.

It was very clear what he wanted from me.

There was an unwritten rule among wolves that had been followed for decades: the mating connection. It was a gift, and I was rejecting both him and the gift. I could feel my wolf reaching out to his, pleading and biting against my humanity. With all of her existence, she detested the way I was leaving him, but there was nothing more I could do.

I knew that, if Derrick found out who I was, he would detest me, therefore I couldn't let him mark me. Until I took his mark, Derrick wouldn't be satisfied with me.

These were our union's truths.

My feet firmly planted on the ground, I slid slowly out of the limousine, before the door closed behind me. I gazed at my reflection in the darkened windows, absorbing the melancholy expression on my face. I stood there looking at myself, and the car stayed still. I thought maybe he was waiting for me to come back to him, to crawl and cry and ask for his forgiveness, so we could ride out into the sunset together.

Rather, I walked back to my apartment after turning away.

I could feel the anguish in my chest as my heart pounded faster and harder with every step I took to put distance between us. I knew that today had only been a taste of what was to come, and that things would only become worse the longer the relationship was neglected.

I was exhausted when I eventually returned to my flat, but the evening was far from done.

My heart's melancholy rhythm was quickening with anxiety.

As I looked about the dimly lit room, I sensed something wasn't quite right: a weird buzzing that seemed to be coming from everywhere. With a menacing growl from my wolf, I put my hand up against the wooden door, feeling around for the handle I had just let go of.

I knew that I wasn't alone. I also understood that I avoided fighting at all costs while I was in this fragile state.

And my imprisoned magic started to grow out of my chest, as if it had sensed my need for its protection. The light ignited at the tips of my fingers and spread over my forearms before spiraling across my upper body. I was terrified, as my magic began to possess me, since this was the most extreme form it had ever taken. The buzzing continued to increase in volume until my powers' glow brought the intruder in the room to light.

I stared at her, feeling as though reality was slipping away from me. My allotted time has ended.

Standing in the center of my living room was the woman from my nightmares, her shadow eluding everything and making me remember the scared little girl I still was. The only thing I knew to protect myself from my mother was to flee, and as I strained to get a firm grip on escape, the air around me appeared to alter, and she laughed cruelly.

The power pulsated once, twice, and then she threw me across the room with superhuman speed, her magic tethers wrapping around my body and dousing it.

I slapped my body hard against the wall, the bricks breaking with the force of my attack, but instead of falling to the earth, I found myself suspended in midair, my body imprisoned to the wall like shackles while I fought against them. Though it had become softer with time, the same anguish was still searing through me.