30

I sat crying on the white tile bathroom floor, holding a handkerchief to my bloody lip in a trance. Once again Calvin had beaten and humiliated me just to show me with his cruel deeds that I was worthless. I've been living with him for a year now. But it felt like an eternity. A hell I would never escape without a fight.

Your life will be wonderful.... Those were the last words my father said to me before he handed me over to the blond beau without showing the slightest trace of remorse.

In the beginning, despite unexpected expectations, it was actually quite pleasant to live with Calvin. He tried very hard to make me happy, always showed his best side, but then it slowly started to become more and more overwhelming, ... unfortunately it always does.

At first there were a lot of arguments about nothing and again nothing. Then the first small slap in the face quickly followed and little by little he no longer had any inhibitions at all. The hits got harder and the triggers for them got smaller and smaller. Some days I didn't even dare get out of bed for fear I would say or do something wrong again that would drive him crazy for no reason.

The fear of him grew with each argument, but I would never show him that. I've never cried in front of him, I always waited until I was alone, because I didn't want to give him that satisfaction.

Also, I didn't always blindly accept his opinions and statements, although that might have been smarter, but I was too stubborn. He called it false pride, but that wasn't false pride, it was just me and no matter how much violence he would threaten me and how many times I would bleed, he would never be able to take my own opinion away from me. My will was too strong for that and my inner wolf too powerful to simply submit to it without resistance.

Exhaling heavily, I pulled myself up from the cool tiles and then looked at my distorted reflection. My long black hair looked lackluster while my brown eyes just stared at me coldly. Angry at seeing myself so bitter, devoid of any warmth or love, I clawed my hands on the edge of the sink and growled loudly. Again and again I convinced myself that he had no power over me, no chance to break me, but meanwhile my outside spoke a different language than my inside.

I couldn't look at myself here for a long time, he would soon be home from work. With trembling hands, I quickly wiped away the remaining tears, then briefly closed my eyes and took several calming breaths to collect myself. Only then, when I felt relaxed and balanced, did I reluctantly open the small door and padded my way into the small, open kitchen to prepare my blonde nightmare's dinner.

"I am back at home!" Indifferently, I gave him a fake smile, which he immediately returned, quickly stepping over to place his lips on mine. Every time he got that close, I had a huge panic. A year and still a virgin saved me at least one thing from the big werewolf. But it was only a matter of time...

"It smells really delicious and you smell amazing too," he whispered excitedly in my ear as he began to caress my neck and slid his hands onto my buttocks as if they belonged only to him.

He slowly pushed me against the fridge and pressed his strong body into mine. Everything in me screamed at such moments, but I couldn't do anything about it, otherwise the next black eye or the next deep wound would find a place on my body. In such moments I just closed my eyes and dived into another world, into a better world. One where I would live alone, where everything would be easier. Where there was no Calvin to try to break me... This world was beautiful...

When he finally let go of me, I let out a relieved breath. The whole time I tried to breathe as little as possible because I didn't want to smell his smell. It would only trigger disgust and disgust in me anyway and I really could do without that.

He walked out of the room with heavy steps, while I continued to take care of the food, which I quickly divided onto two plates and then placed on the small round table. I waited for him at the window, thinking briefly about the men walking down the street in front. Would they be better or worse than Calvin? But since there weren't any decent mates left among wolves these days, I might have even gotten lucky with Calvin. Who knew if others hadn't forced me to have sex long ago...

Calvin would wait, I knew that. He was far too self-absorbed to sleep with a woman who would cry or fight back. He was the type of man who wanted to be begged. Someone who needed to be told how great and good he was.

Disgusting!

I suddenly heard fast footsteps behind me and was about to turn around, but before I could even do that, Calvin abruptly yanked me away from the window by my hair and threw me on the ground so hard that my wrist suffered severe pain from the impact . So it was that time again... The last wound wasn't even healed, I would get new ones right away.

"Why are you staring at other men?!"

I looked up at him as he stood over me as I lay trembling on the floor in front of him and then, unexpectedly, I just started laughing out loud.

I didn't know why I did that. My psyche was probably already completely destroyed and I could no longer assign my feelings and could not keep my emotions under control.

However, with a strong kick in my stomach, my laughter stopped immediately because I had to take a deep breath for fear of choking on the force of his kick. The pain ripped through my whole body, but he wasn't going to win!

I got up carefully and writhed, but tried not to show fear of him and not to cry, because that would probably have pushed him even further.

He just stood angry in front of me. "Fuck you"...I yelled at him over and over in my head while my inner wolf, Saphir, snarled loudly in my head.

When he suddenly wanted to help me to sit down, I slapped his hand away from me full of hatred and bravely faced him, but he knew very well that I had no power over him.

How could you treat someone you live with like that. The one who prepares food for you every day and in whom you were so interested in the beginning.

He sat down across from me in silence, sampling the food that had been set before him and occasionally glancing into my eyes. I held his gaze because he wouldn't break me. Finished eating, he broke the silence.

"You're going to a party with me today, put something nice on. We're going to the Rosys first." Before he disappeared into the bathroom, he gently took my chin, kissed my forehead and then gently stroked my lip, which he had hit on it earlier this afternoon.

How absurd...

Tonight I was going to run away and I didn't give a damn if people found me and killed me or if I was raped by savages. It would all be better than staying with him and slowly losing myself more and more.

With tears in my eyes, I looked at my wound-covered body in front of the wardrobe mirror in the bedroom. Bruises adorned my delicate arms. Add to that the open wound on my lip... I just looked bad.

The red silk dress, which I put on, at least partially covered the wounds and even made me catch my breath with its elegance. I looked beautiful, which made me smile proudly despite the whole situation. I then painted my lips in the exact color of my dress and after admiring myself in the mirror for a moment I walked back to the kitchen where Calvin, looking at me, immediately started licking his lips at me.

Disgusting! But I wanted to provoke him with it, because I knew he loved the red silk dress on my body and would constantly imagine tearing it off my body and taking me on the kitchen table. This idea would almost drive him insane and that was my punishment for him.

Outside, a pleasantly scented breeze greeted me as soon as I took my first breath. The wind blew through my black hair, letting it dance wildly and playfully across my pale face. With relish, I drew the fresh air deep into me, filled my lungs completely with it and then, after slowly exhaling, hesitantly ran after the blond boy.

Arrived at his favorite pub, Rosys, he stood amused to his drinking buddies and pointed to me where I should sit down beforehand. Alone, I sat at the brown corner table, listening to the soft rock music echoing through the dark atmosphere and thinking about my shitty life.

Every now and then Calvin would glance back at me, but his eyes would not meet mine. His eyes fell down to my neckline, which was stunning in the dress. I shook myself in disgust and suddenly found it less intelligent to provoke him in this way. I regret showing myself to him like this...

Two men entered the bar and suddenly drew everyone's attention. I fought back my curiosity at first, knowing I would be punished, but Saphir's loud howl in my head made me look up. what did she have???

Since I was being suppressed more and more by Calvin, she hardly gave a sign of life and now, without any warning, she was turning the wheel in my head so loud that it was already beginning to throb.

The front of the two guys had blond hair that fell past his ears. He looked really interesting and certainly wasn't from around here. I would have noticed him otherwise, as tall as he was and moving gracefully through the small pub.

When my eyes fell on the black-haired man, everything just happened in slow motion before my eyes. He looked at me just as confused as I looked at him. Every single hair on my body stood up at the sight of him, while goosebumps covered my skin, triggering a tingling sensation inside me that made my heart beat faster from one moment to the next. Wide-eyed, I forced myself to take my eyes off his beautiful face immediately. The sapphire whimpered, giving me a hard time, but I didn't need to face my blonde nightmare again today. My stomach still hurt from the kick and even so, I didn't want to face a hopeless fight every day.

Calvin's scent suddenly filled my nostrils intensely and automatically triggered fear in me, which made me wince a little. His hand rested on my thigh and gently stroked me. "Let's go now," he whispered firmly in my ear, while my eyes fell on the empty table in front of me.

Without looking at the two strangers again, I still felt their eyes on my revealing back. A small part of me that the guy at my side hadn't destroyed yet rejoiced in the attention and let me raise my head proudly as I walked gracefully out of this seedy bar.

It was already dark outside, but thanks to the lights along the path, you could still see everything clearly. The small houses, the many large trees between them and of course our pack house which was easily recognizable as the largest house.

When we arrived at our front door, I suddenly remembered the celebration. "Aren't we going to a party?" I asked the blonde, who was staring at me creepily. "We're going to have our own party," he replied with a sickening grin, his cold fingers running down my cleavage, making my heart skip a beat. Before I could feel anything but disgust, he unlocked the door and roughly yanked my wrist into the open kitchen. My pulse was racing with fear because I didn't even know what he was up to. I didn't know what would happen to me now. He must have seen it ... my confused look at the black-haired man, which just came back into my thoughts now.

"Take off the dress!", he instructed me imperiously and at the same time threw everything down from our small dining table. "No!" My lips quivered in panic and my strong fighting heart was pounding so loudly under my chest that I thought he might hear it too.

A low growl and he pulled me violently to himself. He turned me with my back to the table and sat me down without being able to defend myself. He pushed his hips between my legs and with all my might I tried desperately to push him away, but it was no use. He was the stronger and he let me know that by ripping the beautiful dress off my shaking body and just throwing it on the floor and looking at me excitedly ready to destroy everything inside me.

"Calvin please, I-" "Shhh, you're going to like it. I'm very gentle." With his hand on my face ready to hurt me if he had to, he unbuttoned his blue jeans with the other. I closed my eyes, hearing Saphir whimper softly, but I wasn't going to cry. That bastard didn't deserve any emotion from me. Inside I screamed, imagining torturously inflicting the same humiliations on him, and when all I could hear was my heartbeat and rapid breathing, I suddenly felt his bare skin on my thighs, making me catch my breath.

I widened my eyes in shock and hit him in the face with full force. He immediately let go of me, cursing loudly and holding his nose with both hands, from which small drops of blood flowed onto his hands.

I got up quickly and wanted to run away, but everything was spinning around me and it was almost impossible for me to stand. I was thrown into complete panic. Before I could take an unsteady step, he grabbed my hair and threw me to the ground. He dropped his half-naked body on top of me to fix me and I thought I was going to die of fear.

I could feel his rapid, hot breath between my breasts, which were only covered by a small black bra. Giving up wasn't an option for me, I would never willingly let him inside me, so I dug my fingernails into his shoulders, trying to pull him away, but he kept kissing my breasts, one hand trailing down my thighs.

For the first time I cried in front of him. Exhausted and powerless, I gave up reluctantly, dropped my hands, laid my head sideways on the cold floor, didn't want to look at him anymore or look at my body, which he was about to take away from me once and for all.

I only noticed, stunned, that he was laughing softly, probably happy about his triumph, until a loud bang startled him and also ripped me out of my submission.