Chapter 37

"I'm not late, am I?" I said, wondering how long he had been sitting here.

From the looks of the scribbles on his papers, at least a few minutes.

"You're perfectly on time," He replied, pulling out the chair next to his for me to sit.

I was definitely feeling some trepidations running through me as I sat down, letting him tuck the chair under me.

"I came early to make sure dinner was coming along."

"And is it?"

"I'm assuming that's your way of saying you're hungry."

"Well, not to be forward, but if they don't serve dinner soon, I'm going to eat you instead."

And that was my way of saying he looked edible. And if his silent chuckle was anything to go by, he understood.

"I guess we should get the appetizers out, then," He replied, before turning his head towards the kitchen doors.

And then, as if having telepathic powers, out came Giselle with two plates of food.

"This is a cream soup with shallots, portobello mushrooms and parsley," She presented as she placed the food in front of us, along with a basket of bread.

My mouth definitely watered now.

"Thank you," Harry politely offered, just before Giselle smiled and bowed out. I glanced after her, but then down at the soup.

"This almost feels like a restaurant," I laughed nervously and grabbed my napkin.

This almost felt like a date. The ache in my chest came back. Harry, what are you doing?

"I asked them to make a big meal, not a big deal," Harry sighed and did like me, taking his napkin and placing it in his lap. "

"I guess they don't know the distinction."

"Or chose to ignore it," I bid in, biting my lip, before taking my spoon.

This food needed to be inside me now.

Seeing Harry's lips twitching, we both dug into our food and tasted the soup. I moaned not-so-subtle and I didn't give a damn as I swallowed and went in for another spoonful.

Holy shit, what did Jean do to this?

He had to have gotten the pope to bless this soup or something, because it tasted that heavenly.

"I presume you like it?" Harry noted when I kept moaning to myself.

I chuckled and nodded, forcing myself to slow down and grab a piece of bread.

"It's good. Like, really good. I don't know what you're paying Jean, but it's definitely not enough. He needs a raise."

Harry smiled a little and took another sip of his soup.

"I'll be sure to remember that."

The soup was almost enough to distract me from the fact that all of this was small talk and just warmup to something bigger that I felt was brewing. This dinner had to mean something, because despite the fact that I was acting casual, there was a tension I couldn't deny. But for the sake of appearance, I kept the façade up.

"So," I said, breaking off a piece of bread while trying to keep my voice normal.

"Have you found a new project to keep you busy, now that I'm not going to be here to disturb you anymore?"

Harry sipped the white wine in his glass and waited a beat before replying.

"Very diplomatically put. And no, I'm still browsing, so to speak."

"So what was that thing you were looking at before I came in here?"

"This?" He pointed to the papers lying beside his plates.

He gave a vague shrug with his shoulder.

" Just some past notes I was revising. Prevention of boredom."

"I see," I noted, sipping my own glass of wine.

"God forbid not doing math for a day."

"Speaking of which, how is the last assignment coming along?"

He conversed, taking a piece of bread for himself.

"I was actually working on it before dinner. It's coming along, just... very slowly," I replied, giving a sigh.

"But l promise it's still going to be done before I leave. I have until tomorrow morning, after all."

"There's no pressure, Cassandra."

"Well, I’ll consider it practice then. You know, for college. I'm guessing there'll be some pressure coming that way."

"Presumably," Harry replied, after a short moment of chewing. I smiled back, silently.

The conversation died for a moment and it only amplified the tension as we slowly finished our soups. I kept glancing discreetly towards Harry for signs of something, but he was acting normal and like nothing was out of the ordinary.

Except everything was out of the ordinary.

"Are you all packed for tomorrow?" He then finally spoke up.

"Yeah," I replied, smiling a little.

He gave a curt nod back.

More silence.

Thankfully, Giselle chose that moment to come back in and clear our plates out to make room for the main course.

A marinated, seared piece of tenderloin with mesclun greens on top. Sauce on the side and the most inviting salad I had ever seen in my life.

And that came from a meat-lover.

"Looks delicious," I said, smiling up to Giselle who smiled back.

"Give Jean my compliments, please."

"I will," She grinned, before leaving us once again to eat.

Harry picked up his cutlery, but I couldn't take this any longer. I reached for my wine glass to break the tension.

"I'm going to make a toast," I said, seeing Harry lift his eyes.

"Don't worry, it's going to be a short one. And I won't make it corny."

He slowly put down his cutlery and instead reached for his wine.

"God forbid," He mimicked me.

Ignoring his remark, I shook my head and then took a deep breath.

" To a great summer that started up a bit rocky and to be frank, kind of fucked up. But somehow it all turned out better and... it's been a summer I think I ‘Il always remember," I said, softening my voice a little.

"It's been great staying here and it's been. great getting to know and learn from you, Harry. Even when you were being an asshole."

He chuckled quietly, but allowed me that comment with a nod.

"Thank you."

"But now summer's almost over," I said, feeling my stomach twist as I came closer to my point.

"And since I'm leaving tomorrow... I just wanted to say a last few words and express my gratitude for giving me a chance. And for giving me... well, this

summer."

Harry looked back at me, and for a moment, I thought I saw something inside his eyes change. Just for a second, but then he lifted his glass and nodded.

"All the same to you, Cassandra. It's been a pleasure having you stay here. Scams and schemes included."

I laughed dryly, but felt my heart clench in my chest.

"I didn't get the money, but I got the scholarship. I'll take what I can get," I joked, giving him a teasing smile.

He chuckled back.

"So! To going to college and to you staying rich!" I cheered, before sipping my wine and putting it down.

My chest was aching so hard, I almost couldn't hold it back any longer. Just a little while longer.

Harry sipped his wine with a measured look, but then lowered his glass and his eyes.

"That's the thing my family never understood."

I lifted my gaze and frowned ever so slightly.

"Huh?"

He smiled faintly, but then he sighed and leaned back.

"Money does not make you rich. That's only an illusion. You aren't rich until you have something money can't buy.”

My breath slightly froze, but I wasn't sure why.

Maybe because his words were sincerely true, or maybe it was because of the way he had said it... sadly.

"And you have something like that?" I whispered, feeling my heart beat firmly in my chest as he slowly lifted his eyes and looked at me.

"I don't know," He then replied, his voice low and solemn.

I felt my breath stutter and I was officially not okay any longer. I hoped it wasn't showing on the outside, because the last thing I needed right now was to crumble.

But why did I want to be that 'something' so badly?

Taking in a deep breath, I forced my emotions back into their little black box where I had kept them for the past few weeks. It wasn't like me, being this... emotional. I had never been the girl to pine after a man and I wasn't going to start today.

But leaving tomorrow would hurt like fucking hell.

But maybe it was a necessary pain.

"Well... at least you have math," I said, breaking the silence when none of us had spoken for a few minutes.

I saw Harry smile, but it seemed mostly polite.

''Yes, I suppose."

Asshole.

I tried not to show my anger and my pain, but mostly because.. because it wasn't really Harry I was angry at.

It was myself.

For expecting him to be the brave one of us, for putting these things on him that I wanted him to say when he clearly didn't feel the same way.

I was angry at myself for giving myself hope that this dinner would be his moment to confess.

But it wasn't.

"Cassandra?"

"Huh?" I looked up and realized I had zoned out.

Harry was looking at me with a small crease between his brows and eyes that pierced me too closely.

"What?"

He watched me for another moment, but then clenched his jaw a little.

"Are you sure you're ready for tomorrow?"

I almost laughed. Almost.

Because that almost sounded like a backwards way of saying 'are you sure you want to leave?' but I very well knew now he didn't have the guts to say it.

Because he didn't feel it.

"Of course," I therefore replied, screwing a perfect smile on my lips as my heart silently shattered.

"Why wouldn't I be? There's nothing stopping me from going, after all, is there?"

And to that, his eyes stopped piercing me and turned away.

He picked up his fork and knife, and with a calm voice replied; "No."

Coward.

But was it me, or was it him?