Being in Control is out of Control

Gulaab POV

It was the first time. It was the first that I couldn't stop myself. I wasn't able to keep myself in control anymore. And knowing that Sultan was feeling the same way I did, I couldn't stop myself either anymore. He also faced what I faced.

I never knew that my life would take such a turn that I would get married to a person who could understand me. He definitely needed me.

Looking at his face, I realized how alone he was feeling. How heavy his heart was feeling. His eyes were dark like the chamber. His body was naked and hot as the fire. I was feeling like the moth that was ready to be burned.

I asked him something and he turned me suddenly against the wall. I was hardly reaching his shoulders. He was a taller and strongly built man. His bulky biceps caged me closer to him and I felt his face coming closer to the corner of my neck. I tilted my head on one side in the effect and felt him pulling the hairpin out of my hair.

My hair loosened and I felt him holding my hair lightly. He held my hair slightly harsh this time and tilted my head making my face closer to him. A strong gasp left my mouth.

My heartbeat raced with this move of him and I felt butterflies in my stomach. His warm lips touched my cheeks and I closed my eyes in the effect. I wasn't able to think anything properly. His hold on my hair was keeping my all attention and his lips near my cheeks were sending shivers all across my body.

"Do you know how many women are there in my Harem?" His hot voice traveled to my ear and I felt as I was frozen. I wasn't expecting this when I came to his chamber. He was drunk and seeming more dangerous I had ever seen.

Suddenly, his movement caught my attention as he pulled my hair slowly and lightly making my face lean backward closer to him. His lips were closer to my neck as he asked.

"Hnn?"

I tried to shook my head and his voice took me to another world now.

"The many, if I am going to spend each night with all, then it will take years"

"Sultan" I breathed as his lips touched my neck and I felt his other hand pulling my dupatta down from my shoulders.

"But no, I have never dared to touch anyone other than my love" He muttered closer to my ear that shivers to my body and continued.

"Neither I will"

He said and turned me suddenly. I was feeling so small in front of him. I looked into his eyes with a racing heartbeat while his gaze fixed on my hairs. He ran his fingers all across my hairs from tip to tail.

"What do you want?" He asked looking into my eyes coming dangerously closer. His hand snaking my waist and pulling me closer. I placed my hand on his chest and my feet slightly in the air as his hold on my waist was strong enough.

I could see the pain in his eyes. The pain he was going through for accepting or rejecting me. I could feel it. He was a committed person and loved someone wholeheartedly. It was impossible for him to give that place to someone and that too an enemy. But, I was the most vulnerable at that time. I couldn't see him like that. I didn't know how would I be able to live with the fact that from inside that I started feeling for him. Knowing the fact that how much he was respectful towards women made me fall for him in no time.

I held my breath and leaned in closer to his shoulder. I placed a small kiss over his neck and muttered.

"You and your pain"

He tightened his hold on my waist and hugged me. He lifted me in his arms and I raked my arms around his neck in nervousness.

Before I could understand what was happening, he walked towards the bed and loosened the hug making me sit on the edge of the bed.

A huge eruption of butterflies occurred in my stomach when he climbed on the bed placing his knee on either side and I crawl a little backward.

I was looking into his eyes for any question or answer but he did something that took me to another world and I felt hot as hell.

He cupped my cheek with one hand light and I felt his other hand moving to my hairs. He ran his fingers inside my hairs and fisted them slightly. I tilted my head backward and I moaned slowly closing my eyes.

I held his wrists as he came closer to my face and placed his lips over the corner of my lips. It was hot as hell. His naked body was affecting me to the core. I could feel the warmness around and a shiver ran through my spine.

"I am all yours Begum... as we are married to each other"

He said and kissed the corner of my lips. My heartbeat was racing madly and I felt him forcing his weight over me slightly. I lied on the bed and opened my eyes. I looked into his eyes and he was looking into mine with a devilish and painful gaze.

"You know that my love is someone else. I would never be able to give that place to you" He said looking at my face and feathered my cheeks a little.

"Accepted," I said looking into his eyes.

"It's very tough to stay with me... there are thousands of enemies of mine, You know I lost her because of this reason." He said.

"My death was fixed... Now I want to live for some days" I said and a tear slipped my eyes.

He washed the tear away with the pad of his thumb and moved me above to him. He lied on the bed and made me lie over him slightly closer.

I felt exposed as my blouse made my cleavage visible and I felt timid. My hairs danced in the effect and I lowered my gaze shyly.

He placed his hand on my neck and cheek and I felt his rough skin again on my cheek. His palm was warm and I closed myself for a few moments feeling it.

"Sultan, I know that this all is wrong... very tough. Against what your heart wants but what do I do? I am not able to control... I frequently think about you. I want to feel you" The words escaped my lips and he sat up suddenly.

A shiver of fear ran through my body and I moved a little away from him. My heartbeats raced to no extent and I was looking into his eyes.

My heart was about to come out of my skin when he suddenly held my hand and pulled me closer making me sit over his lap. He held my right thigh looking into my eyes and adjusted me over him. My breath increased and my chest was doing up and down. I felt butterflies in my stomach with his sudden move and lowered my gaze.

His bare chest was touching my body and a heart-racing thought ran through my brain. A slight feeling of fear overtaken me in no time. I was trying to calm down but it was proven of no use when he pushed my hair backside with his fingers and looked at me from neck to waist.

He touched both of my arms and moved his palm from my arms to my wrist. He moved my hands backwards and cageg both of my wrists with one hand tightly. My heartbeat raced even more. I was slight tickles in my lower abdomen. And then he held the hem of my blouse on the shoulder and pulled the sleeve low.

I lifted my gaze to look at him. I was out of words. He brought his face closer to my neck and placed the most beautiful kiss I ever felt on my shoulder. He was caging me perfectly that I couldn't move, I couldn't deny and all I could do was to feel whatever he was doing.

He moved to the center of my neck and I fell my head backward as he sucked on my neck. A moan escaped my mouth when his teeth bit my skin a little. I felt out of breath.

His lips moved lower making a trail closer to my cleavage and I felt shivers in my body. Sitting over his lap in that condition was making me hell uncontrollable that moment. I had little control over myself over whatever happening.

He sucked on my left side of my chest and I breathe deeply.

"Sultan"

He smiled lightly and I felt his lips moving closer to my ears. He muttered slowly.

"Such a small frame you are... you will die because of it"

I felt goosebumps over my neck hearing his hot voice and he suddenly snaked my waist and pulled me slightly more close.

My heart was beating madly at that time. He looked into my eyes and I lifted my gaze too. His hold on both my wrist behind my back was still tight. He brought his lips closer to mine. I was getting mad moment after moment. He stopped just an inch away and I waited for a few moments to come closer.

I leaned my lips closer to his impatiently and he moved his face a little away. I felt defeated, I again leaned closer to his lips, and he devilishly did it again. He was well aware of my impatience and desire as he did something that I wasn't expecting.

He placed his index finger over my lips and traced it lightly. It filled me with some kind of desire and craving instantly. I closed my eyes and I felt him kissing on my neck. He sucked on my chest and I moaned. He pushed his finger inside my mouth and I bite it sweetly.

He sucked on my skin a little harshly and I escaped a loud moan this time.

"Ahhh"

He loosened his grip on my hand and they instantly reached his cheeks. I cupped his face and brought it closer to mine. I didn't think twice before claiming his lips with mine. I placed a small kiss over his lips. I took his lower lip between mine and then I realized where his hands moved. His hands reached the backside of my blouse and pulled the strings. One after the other he opened two strings of my blouse and held his biceps tightly to stop him from reaching the third one.

"Sultan!" I requested.

He stopped instantly and I tried to calm my breath.

His hands moved to my waist, holding it a little tighter, and then he pushed me down on the bed hovering over me. He pinned both of my hands above my head and I looked at him taking out my nosering. He looked at me for a moment and then placed his lips over mine. He sucked my lips roughly, harshly, softly, and deeply. I couldn't stop myself from moaning and he made me a mess in no time.

He got out of breath and touched his forehead with mine.

He loosened my hands and I tried to calm down my breath.

"You shouldn't have come here, begum," He said and lied beside me hiding his face near my stomach.

I turned a little and touched his face with my hands. He hugged my waist and kissed my stomach saying.

"I can't put your life in danger doing this"