Chapter 51 NO GOING BACK NOW

S E G U N

I fan myself with my hands, wondering why the repairman hasn't yet come to work on the air conditioner.

Dipo made the mistake of leaving it on overnight, and now it's overworked itself. That, or they don't make airconditioners like they used to.

The door opens and in walks a familiar-looking woman. Try as I might, I'm not able to recall her name.

I frown when I notice the tight short skirt she has on. Extremely inappropriate clothing for the office.

As she comes close, I get a spark of recognition.

Damn Dipo and his soft heart.

She'd come in crying and begging for a job, so he decided to hire her on the spot as our secretary. In just one month, her dressing has changed from long skirts and long-sleeved blouses to short dresses and skirts.

At first, I'd overlooked it, thinking she was having a wardrobe crisis, but as the days passed, it's gotten worse. She's already looking like she's on sale.

Whatever she's selling, I'm definitely not buying.

I sigh as I close my eyes and open them again, making up my mind to have a talk with her.

As I clear my throat, she drops the files I didn't know were in her hands, on the table with a flourish, and sits on the edge of my table. Her lips coil in a smile as she leans towards me.

Oh lord, no!

I clear my throat, ready to try again, but her hand shoots out and a finger lands on my lips, stopping my words from coming out. She shakes her head and attempts a sultry smile.

I get the feeling she's putting up a show, one she practised in front of a mirror before she left the house.

I remove her finger that's still stationed on my mouth, and attempt a lecture.

Juliet. . . " but her eyes take up a fevered look as she stares at me fixated, so I try again. "Juliet!" This time, my voice comes out weak and strangled. I sound pathetic.

Correction: I am pathetic.

So pathetic I couldn't even win back the love of my life.

Shaking away my drowning thoughts, I glance at Juliet once more, only to notice she's pitching forward, palms down on the table.

Now she's leaning close to me, her eyes locked on my lips.

Wait, what?

"JULIET!" My voice booms out sharply, waking Dipo from his snoring slumber.

Her eyes seem to clear. She shakes her head, as if clearing it of invisible cobwebs, and hastily straightens up.

"I'm so very sorry, sir. I wasn't . . ." She's clearly flustered as her hands circle the air, making a weird motion.

"Were you trying to kiss me?" Disgust drips from my tone as I stare incredulously at her. I never would have imagined I'd go through this assault again, for that's exactly what it is.

"I'm s. . . s. . . sorry, sir. I didn't, I wasn't . . ." She shakes her head as tears gather in her eyes.

Please, not the damsel in distress act.

Once upon a time, I would have either laid her across the table and taken her or fired her, but now I just can't summon the energy for either.

"Just leave me alone." I'm suddenly bone-tired as I close my eyes and lean against the chair.

Once the door closes behind her, Dipo let's out a loud hoot and bangs on the table like a barbarian.

"Damn, bro, you're practically a married man, yet girls are still trying to get you in the sack."

I look at him, confusion pasted all over my face.

"Married? To whom might that be?"

He rubs his hands down his face tiredly. "Listen! Never mind what Eve told you or that you haven't heard from her. You and I know she's just bidding her time. She can't do without you."

"Right!" I roll my eyes and rub my temples. "I just wish my kids didn't have to witness their dad - who by the way they'd never even met before that day - and mum, almost having sex." I grimace remembering how Eve's eyes had turned cold and in a voice filled with pure frost, she'd told me to leave.

Dipo doubles up and lets out a belly laugh. I shake my head and pay attention to the files on my table instead.

When his laughter abates, he slips into the role of advisor. "That shit is so annoying - when you want to get with your woman and next thing your kid zooms into the room like a hurricane demanding attention from her. You've got your thing standing at attention, wanting -- No! Needing to be appeased, but then she gets it into her head to attend to our kid and waltzes off without even a backward glance, talk more of a promise to satiate my needs. That hurts!"

It takes me a full minute to realise he's talking about himself and Ebere.

It's my turn to burst into laughter, but it soon peters off when I remember how I'd felt holding and touching Eve.

Like I'd come home.

The feelings had swept through me and I couldn't stop them. Didn't want to, really.

Two years disappeared before my eyes the moment we touched.

I'd forgotten how strong of a hold she has over me.

All the pain and hurt had melted away.

I close my eyes and a vision of Tay and Kay sail into my mind.

My kids.

It still feels like a dream.

I've got two adorable twins who are going to be a handful soon.

Tay is the quiet one, just like Eve, but Kay . . . I can already see him being a rake in the making.

As sad as it is to acknowledge that fact, it's true.

Once I carried them to their room, Tay was already out like a light, so I'd tucked her into her cot, but as I was doing so, Kay tapped me on the leg.

"You, my daddy?" He'd looked up hopefully at me and so I'd stooped to his level and carried him unto my laps.

"If you want me to be." I'd replied him.

He'd thought about it for a few seconds and then a vigorous nodding had ensued thereafter.

I was scared he was going to get dizzy, so I'd pulled him to me, but he'd pushed me away and demanded I read him a bedtime story. I didn't know a thing about that, sadly., and I couldn't possibly traumatize my own son with tales of my youth, so I'd told him I didn't know any bedtime stories. He'd ordered me to sing to him instead, which I'd done haltingly . . . at first. It was an old Spanish ballad. Later on, I picked up speed as the words flowed seamlessly.

Kay's eyes had sparkled with interest, but they'd soon faded as his eyes drooped and he sagged against me. I couldn't stop the tears that spilled from my eyes thereafter.

After that day, Eve told me not to come back again. She said she had moved on and didn't want a reminder of the past.

Her words were a shock I still haven't gotten over. Doubt I ever will.

I booked myself into a hotel close to them for three days and went back to see her and the kids, hoping she would be in a better mood, but no such luck. She'd stepped out onto the porch and closed the door behind her, her face a frozen mask. She'd stoically refused I see the kids, even after begging like my life depended on it.

In a way, my life had depended on it, still does if I'm going to be honest.

Fancy finding out you're a father of two adorable twins but then access to them promptly gets cut off thereafter.

I'd left England that same day, hurt all over again from her words. It's been two months and counting and I've been hoping I get a call from her letting me know she's changed her mind, but no such luck yet.

Maybe it would have been better if I'd gotten married to Tracy after all, and moved on with my life because it feels like there's no meaning to it presently.

But no more.

I'm done running after someone who doesn't want me. Soul mate or not.

I've decided to capitulate. To lay down my sword. I've fought the good fight, metaphorically speaking, but it's over now.

I give up.

I lost. She won.

Time to rest and look to the future, however bleak it may seem.

As painful as it is, there's no going back from my decision.

It's finally over between Eve and I.

I breathe out a ragged breath and swipe a rough palm across my face.

"Dude, I know just what you need." Dipo pipes up. He obviously feels sorry for me.

I raise a brow as I wait for him to land.

"Let's go get some drinks."

"Naah! Not in the mood for alcohol." I shake my head.

"Since when have you not been in the mood for alcohol. Come on, bro, you'll feel better. We could go downtown where you can ogle them chicks, you don't have to touch them. Lord knows I need some diversion right about now."

"You'd best not let me find out you're cavorting with some prostitute, D. Ebere is like my sister, you'd do well to remember that," I tell him, wagging a finger.

"You should have known me better than that by now, bro. Monogamy is my thing, but asides that, Ebere will most definitely cut off my balls if she so much as catches a whiff of a female scent around me. So no, I like them crown jewels intact, thank you very much." He cups the front of his trousers and makes a face.

"Alright then, let's get outta here." I'm already grabbing my keys and standing, but as I get to the door, I turn around. "Juliet has got to go, bro. She's a liability I can't afford right about now."

Dipo sighs and nods. "You're right." He gets close and clamps a hand on my shoulder. "My, you've grown. Look at you behaving responsibly. Some years back, you'd have tapped that."

Yeah, I know. I paid a heavy price for that with my heart.

Four hours later, I stumble into the house drunk as a skunk. Dipo had tried cajoling me to stay, but I'd given him the finger and requested an Uber. Couldn't possibly drive in such a condition. Once upon a time I'd have been reckless and driven myself home, but I've got three kids who still need their father, two of who don't even know me yet.

Even if Eve doesn't want me anymore, fine, but I must get to know my children, come what may. I need to be a part of their lives. I've wasted too much time already.

The lights in the sitting room are on and mother sits on one of the couches, watching tv.

"Hi, mum." Is it me, or is she actually watching a muted television and smiling to herself.

Her eyes light up as she sets her eyes on me.

"Hi, son, come sit beside me. I've got something to tell you."

Her smile is from ear to ear. Unfortunately for her, I'm bone tired. All I want to do is sleep off this alcohol haze foisted on me by Dipo.

"Sorry, mum, if it's about Stacy's school fees, they've been paid already. Let's talk in the morning, I'm tired."

"But, son. . . "

The rest of her words get cut off as I close my bedroom door behind me. Without putting the lights on, I remove my clothes and shoes, toss them in a corner, and walk barefoot to the toilet.

After taking a leak, I figure I might as well have a shower. I smell like a brewery, so I slip out of my boxers and take the quickest shower I've ever had, making sure to brush my teeth when I'm done.

I make my way back to the bedroom and slip under the covers.

Before I know it, the peaceful hands of sleep claim me, but something jerks me awake not long after. . . A noise.

On second thoughts, it sounds more like a giggle, one that's obviously not coming from me. I stagger up and pad to the wall, but in my haste to get to the switch, I trip on my feet, almost breaking my neck in the process.

Once I flick the switch and light floods the room, I'm taken aback at the sight that greets me.

It can't be . . .

Yet the proof is staring me right in the face.

I pinch myself several times and rub my eyes, but their images still stay put on my bed.

Tay and Kay are coiled up asleep on one side of my bed, with Eve lying beside them, all smiles.

I'm dreaming. That must be it, so I close my eyes and open them again, but they're still there. Eve's smile has gotten even wider.

I'm at a loss for words, but I still manage something. "Are you real?" I advance forward with jerky hesitant movements. "Are you all real?" I echo again.

The smile in response to my question is instant. "Yes, Aurey, I'm back. We are back. " She gestures to the twins, and comes down from the bed. She walks towards me, stopping only when there's a hair's breadth of space in between us. "Will you accept us?"

I'm scared this might be an illusion, so I hold her by the waist and pull her to me, exhaling loudly. "With my whole body and soul."

Her dimples make an appearance as she smiles sweetly and throws her hands around my neck. "I don't want to ever be apart from you again."

I pul her closer to me and bury my face in the side of her neck and breathe in her strawberry scent before replying into her ears. "Never again, princess. Never again."

As I hold her close to me, my heart soars with joy. We move to a silent beat only our hearts can hear.

That's when it suddenly occurs to me - I'm finally complete.