Paper

"How are you?"

"My head still hurts a bit but it's okay."

"You're stronger than me to drink now but you're still not used to it. You really have a low tolerance for alcohol aren't you? You're still good at drinking Chona. We work so much that I can't drink. But you're serious! Four times a week! How are you doing with that?" He laughed at what I said.

"I don't feel weird yet so maybe it's okay--"

"Hi brother!"

I was devastated when Carl entered the kitchen. The two of us met eye to eye. Its forehead is furrowed. I was the first to evade. I still can't forget what happened.

Damn it!

"Hmm, Leigh! Carl fixed you last night if you don't remember. I was tired last night. Carl wanted to help so I let him."

"T-thank you Carl."

It just greeted me and then left the kitchen. He didn’t get coffee or anything.

I sighed. Letse! Even my relationship with my cousin is different because of them!

Carolina's eyebrows met.

"Anyare don? Why does it seem like a bad trip? Do you know anything about Leigh?"

"H-ha?"

"Aren't you and Kuya close too? Do you know why he had a bad trip?"

I was swallowed.

"N-no ..."

"Hey you're weird!" she said. It has left the kitchen. I sighed.

I'm a fool! After all, I can mistake Theron for Carl!

Both have the same muscular body and are handsome but Theron is different from him.

Letse! I shouldn't be thinking about that animal! He's the reason I'm like this!

"Leigh!"

I turned to Carolina to re -enter the kitchen. I looked down at the crumpled paper in his hand.

"I forgot to tell you before. I saw it in your uniform when you came back. You can't talk much so I didn't find the time to give it." he said, handing me the small, square piece of paper.

"I saw it in your pocket. I'm sorry it's wrinkled, it's a bit wet. I'm doing laundry non e."

"Thank you Carolina."

"Welcome Leigh!" she said. He gave a flying kiss before leaving the kitchen again.

I looked down at the paper I was holding. Almost nothing to read because it has already been read. The only one left is the name Ignacio.

My forehead furrowed.

Ignacio ...

That's my real father's name according to Theron. I turned and examined the paper several times but there was nothing to read but Ignacio.

So did he give me information about the real parent?

I sighed. That information is irrelevant because it has already been read. Why didn’t I notice it before?

I close my eyes tightly. Of course. I was so hurt that I did nothing but cry so I didn't notice that my pocket was empty. Another was blindfolded and my hand was tied.

I thought he just did all that or maybe he forgot the condition we agreed on before.

I stood up and threw the paper in the trash near the sink. That doesn't matter because there is no hope that I will ever see real parents. I stopped looking, Tyang was afraid that I might disappear again.

I still remember its reaction the day I came back.

The bead of sweat made its way from my neck to my chest. The iron roof does not help the hot temperatures brought on by the sun. It only added to the heat as if I was also outside and soaked in the sun.

The heat brought by the direct sun is not a problem in the house where I have been staying for more than a month because it has air conditioning, it is far from our house which is not that beautiful and only the electric fan is heat resistant.

My gaze remained on the fan stand on the side, I bought it on my first paycheck before. On its side is the not -so -large tv that sits on a square table. The house is still the same, nothing has changed since I disappeared.

"Leigh Ann!"

Leigh Ann ... I just heard that name again. It sounds different ... It feels new to me like it's not my name ...

"Leigh Ann!"

I turned to my Aunt, he was sitting across from me. Earlier he hugged me and stared at me. Good and it stopped hugging me when Carolina said.

"After more than a month you appeared! Where are you from? What happened to you?"

Tart dropped me off near the coffee shop where they kidnapped me before. He stopped the car at the part where not many people passed by. From there I walked to Aunt's cafeteria. Many have noticed me, it will be easy for me to return to Tyang and Carolina. They guarded Aling Anna's cafeteria to take me home.

"Leigh Ann, where are you from ?!" she questioned.

I don’t know what to say to Tyang. Should he know the truth about my disappearance or not?

"What's wrong with you? Why did you suddenly disappear? Do you know where we were looking for you? We went to the barangay and the precinct! We also looked for you in the other barangay! We are also called Raffy Tulfo! Kuya Wil even appeared on Kuya Wil's tv show Carolina to call you! "

I want to laugh at what Tyang said. They went to Brother Will to call me. If I hadn't just been kidnapped, I might have contributed to the two of them and Carolina because they didn't take me with them. We have wanted to see and go to Kuya Wil's show for a long time. If only I hadn't been kidnapped.

But how can I tell them of what happened to me? It’s such a nightmare that I don’t even want them to know about it. Because it’s pains my heart… my body… and my soul.

Who could ever move on from this?

They took my life!

They took my purity.

My innocence!

My everything!

And they dumped me just like that… like I was a toy they are done playing. I’m nothing to them anymore. They got what they want and they drop me off.

I feel so fucking dirty for playing their games.

But I let them do it to me.

It’s my fault for making myself dirty…

Making myself unworthy for their love...

For anyone’s love.

I let myself be toyed by them. By the cruelest men in the world!

They both look like an angel that God send to help me, to protect me, to love me. But it’s too good to be true!

I should have known.

I’m such a fool.

A fucking fool for believing them.

"It's so true Leigh! Do you know what went through mama's mind when you disappeared? We're both almost crazy about what happened to you. I thought it was just a barangay prank! Mama is ready to sell the cafeteria if kidnapped for ransom is the reason why you lost! I stopped immediately because that was impossible! We don't have money so those of us can't find anything! If you were kidnapped to sell your body, that's okay because you're beautiful! "

"Carolina, you're not helping Leigh Ann's situation!"

He was blown away by what Tyang said.

"Oh my God! You took me out of the water squeezing my chest at what you're saying Carolina!"

This in turn followed the Mother. Tyang took a deep breath then turned to me.

"Leigh Ann, what happened to you?"

I looked down at its eyebags. Tyang's face was tired, it looked like it had aged in just over a month. Tyang didn't look like this before I disappeared ...

"Leigh Ann."

"I don't remember Aunty."

At this point I just want to forget everything, like nothing happened, like I have amnesia. If I could hit my head to the wall so I forget everything. That would hurt for sure but nothing hurts me more than what they did to me. It’s unforgivable.

Its forehead furrowed. "What don't you remember?"

I sighed.

"I don't know what happened to me, Aunty."

"Are you amnesiac Leigh Ann?" It approached me and examined my head.

"You don't have a wound or anything on your head. So how... Are you sure you don't remember Leigh?"

"Fuck you're so hot, Lineah."

"Ohh... Damn!"

"I'll kiss you so damn hard."

"You're so wild."

"You're only mine tonight, Lineah."

I closed my eyes firmly and shook my head. I tried not to reveal to Tyang what had happened to me.

"Leigh Ann."

"O-oo Aunty ..." I said, then averted my eyes. I looked down at the finger, I firmly squeeze it.

It doesn't matter if I tell him that Theron and Thander kidnapped me, he probably doesn't know like me.

That story is also hard to believe. I am just a simple and poor woman, I am also adopted so they can get nothing from me. I'm not that beautiful, they both look the same, they'll just laugh at me when I tell them that the two of them made fun of me.

I don't want them to know what my two siblings are up to. I don't want them to feel sorry for me... It's enough for me to feel pain and self -pity. They don’t need to know what happened to me. It’s nightmare and nightmares are meant to stay in my mind. It can hunt me in my dreams but now in my waking moment, they won’t haunt me here. I’m aware and I won’t let them. I don’t want my auntie to take this problem, I don’t want her to carry the problem on her shoulders. She already had enough. I gave her a lot of problems already.

"Did you look for your parents? I hope you at least told Leigh Ann so we wouldn't have to worry." I wish I had just looked for them that day, I would not have been kidnapped.

"Did you have a fight?" More than that happened to me.

"Tyang, it’s not like that. I don’t."

"Oh! You know you didn't fight so what happened to you?"

"I don't really remember anything."

"Do you think I'll believe you don't remember Leigh Ann? Tell me the truth if you've all been together I won't be angry. If you want to stand out I'll let you, you're big and you can handle yourself. Just say goodbye to us, it's not like you're going to kill me for what happened to you! "

"I don't remember anything."

"Leigh Ann I'm not a fool. Even if you don't come from me, I know you like my child ..."

I averted my eyes from him.

"I know if you're lying or not. It's impossible to lose more than a month and come back with no one to remember."

"I don't remember anything."

"Mom, that was a fight with Buknoy!"

I sighed. I would rather let them know that I was kidnapped than believe that I had an affair with that man.

Bobby is its real name. He is just used to being called Buknoy here. Bobby is the man who has shown the most interest in me ever since. He always eats in the cafeteria and always gives flowers that he just picked from their neighbors. Mystical, tall, his body was just right. He wants girls here in our area besides me. First because I had no interest in men back then. Secondly I don’t have the focus on the relationship. Third is because he is arrogant and has bad manners.

"What happened? Did you fight? Did Buknoy beat you up? The idiot--"

"Even though I don't remember anything I'm sure I didn't date Buknoy Tyang!"

"Are you sure?"

I sighed.

"Yes." As many as possible reasons why I was lost, it never crossed my mind that one was dealing with what they thought.

"It looks like Leigh Ann didn't fight because Buknoy didn't disappear here in the barangay like he did.

Aunty's eyes narrowed at me. It doesn’t seem convinced by the excuse I don’t remember.

I should have banged my head on the cement before I went straight to the cafeteria, just in case I lost my memory with Theron and Thander...

I never stopped looking for parents. It's just that nobody really knows.

Within two months many were different from me. Aunty's attention. Until now, he is still not convinced that I don't remember anything, especially my actions. He doesn't force me but sometimes he still asks questions. I still chose not to tell the truth and I have no intention of telling it unless something unexpected happens.