Hope

Between the smell of seafood and rich upstate lobbyists gloating about how they successfully cheated on their wives and got away with it, I didn't know which nauseated me the most.

Nonetheless, after counting to ten in my head, I got up from the table I'd been sitting on and decided to take a breather because something about watching Maria stab the lobster meat with her fork and pry the shell open made my stomach turn in ways it shouldn't.

I wasn't a big fan of seafood and my pregnancy only intensified the need to throw up. Excusing myself, I took the elevator up to the grand terrace where I leaned over the banister for a fresh breath.

The skyline was beautiful—absolutely magnificent. I always loved how the blue haze of day fell and lifted to reveal the stars. It was euphoric—as if God had singlehandedly sprinkled glitters upon the most perfect of black portraits.

I smiled, feeling the wind blow my hair into a tousled mane as I reminisced back to the days of my childhood when I'd push my head out of my bedroom window and look upwards, watching the stars.

Growing up, I always had these bizarre fantasies.

Back then, I would perch by my open window and stare at the twinkling stars half the night, wondering what it would feel like to love and be loved in return.

It was silly, I knew but ever since my then childhood friend, Becky Rose introduced me to a world of romantic novels, there'd been a permanent ache in my chest, an endless yearning to experience romance at its peak. The kind my mother never experienced, the kind my father never gave.

Most times I would daydream about a man. I would picture us together, strolling hand-in-hand, happy smiles on our faces. I'd dreamt that we had this huge house with maids, butlers, and two little kids running around. It was perfect, almost real, a happily ever after I could almost grasp.

But now...

Now, it felt like I was never going to get my happily ever after.

It was shocking how I went from being the little kid who wanted to touch stars to the high schooler who just wanted to be loved, and then the college student who tried to love but got her heart broken, and now the unemployed college grad pregnant and engaged to a man she barely knew or liked.

Pathetic.

That was the word.

I chuckled at my dilemma, not failing to notice the gracious footsteps now approaching me from behind.

"What are you doing out here alone?"

What did he want now?

"Just taking a breather," I mumbled, not turning to look at him. "I felt nauseous in there."

"Understandable." He stepped closer and I could feel his body behind me.

"What about you, why are you here?"

"Well, I'm trying to get away from your brother." He expelled a sigh behind me. "For some reason, he enjoys painting me the villain."

I only hummed, fighting against the urge to lean into his warm body. "Well, he isn't wrong, is he?"

"I couldn't care less." He drawled, and my heart nearly jumped out of my chest when I felt his arms circle my waist from behind.

"Killian, what are you—"

"Relax," he soothed, breathing into my neck. I shivered. "There's a man with a camera up that commercial building."

Slowly, I looked up at the commercial building just opposite us and indeed saw a man taking pictures of us. He looked like a reporter. They weren't hard to recognize. I bit my lip. "What do we do now?"

His grip around my waist tightened and it did not help matters now that his hard chest was pressed into mine, leaving no space between us. "Just stay casual and act natural."

I closed my eyes and tried to keep my voice steady while my heart hammered against my ribs. "You seem like an expert in these things."

"Not my first rodeo." He shrugged and I didn't know if he was just trying to rile me up on purpose but his groin pressed against my ass, pushing me forward on the banister.

I gulped and looked up at the commercial building to distract myself from what was happening to my insides. "The man doesn't seem like he's going to leave soon."

"Maybe he will once we give him a show." He spun me around in a beat and pressed into me so that we were body to body, breast to chest. "Kiss me."

His words hung in the air like a bomb. My eyes widened, cheeks flushed. "Why the hell would I do that?"

"Because you want the man to leave. Don't you?"

A jolt of nervousness whisked through me. "I do."

"Kiss me then."

What? "No."

"Why? We've done it before, haven't we?"

"That was different," I shot. "I wasn't in the right state of mind."

His lip quirked. "You don't look like you're in the right state of mind now either."

"Neither do you asshole." I flattened my palm on his chest to push him off but he held me still.

"Feisty." He laughed, a deep, smooth sound that made my skin tingle. "Well, since you're too scared to do it, I will." Without remorse, he cupped my face and dunked his head down to steal my lips, his warm mouth stopping my flow of anger.

God, I was so pathetic, extremely pathetic because instead of pushing him away, I moaned, allowing his tongue enter my mouth, allowing it remind me of how he'd claimed me once before. And then when he pulled away, I just stared helplessly at him, my lips throbbing from his searing kiss.

He smirked, uneven breaths lifting his chest. "Hope Sterling, did you just moan for me?"

Shit.

I tried to push back from his grip but like the first time, he didn't budge. "I didn't. You heard wrong."

"I'm pretty sure I did."

"No, you didn't!" I said a little defensively, knowing he was probably right.

He arched an eyebrow. "Alright then prove it. Kiss me again."

What the hell was wrong with this guy?

"You're insane," I bit.

"What does that say about you? You're moaning for an insane person."

Oh woah. Irritation spiked in my veins and I realized I was fully over this conversation. "Since you want the kiss so bad." My hand sunk into his hair as I tugged him down back to my lips. "Here have it." I kissed him with just the same fervor and he groaned into my mouth, immediately taking control of the kiss and squeezing my hip as he pulled me to him, ravaging me, so much so that all senses were lost. But they seemed to recall back quickly when someone called out my name.

"Rosabella?"

Only one person addressed me by that name.

My mum.

Shit.

My eyes flew open and I instantly tried to untangle myself from Killian but he wasn't cooperating. Shit. I turned to her. She was looking at me curiously. "Mom it's not what you think, I...we—"

Killian surprisingly tucked me against his side. "Mother-in-law, It's so delightful to see you."

Before I could absorb his words or figure out how I genuinely felt about them, I was caught off guard by my mother's reaction.

She smiled genuinely at him. "I believe the pleasure is mine. Nice to see you again, Killian. And thank you for the gifts you sent, I'm still yet to open all the boxes."

"Ah," he chuckled. "It's nothing and you should get used to it because I haven't begun to spoil your family yet."

Okay, what the hell was happening here?

Back the fuck up.

Startled, I looked from his face to my mother's. They were looking at each other, smiling fondly, and I seemed to be the only one lost.

"Killian." I swung my gaze to him. "How do you know my mother?"

He turned to me, finally letting go. "Your mother and I already met," he said. "I'm afraid I forgot to mention it before since we've been busy planning our wedding and all that."

What?!

My brows crimped with confusion and I was trying as hard as I could to understand what he was saying but this wasn't making sense.

"Well isn't it just lovely?" My mother smiled, adding to my confusion. "I hope she isn't giving you much trouble. She can be a little stubborn sometimes and it might be extra now that she is pregnant."

He chuckled. "I assure you, she has been nothing but obedient."

My eyes widened. "Mom, you...know about my pregnancy?"

She nodded, smiling at me with kind eyes. "This gentleman over here volunteered to help my retirement home after confessing his feelings for you and breaking the news about my grandchild on the way," her eyes lowered to my belly. "I was disappointed at first because the news wasn't coming from you but when he told me how Inlove you both are and how scared you were about the baby, I understood."

I was stupefied, shocked, too stunned to speak, and quite frankly, feeling stupid.

"Indeed, I hope you don't mind that we kept our relationship hidden for so long. We just didn't want to be the center of attraction."

The more Killian spoke, the angrier I was becoming, and it didn't help that my mother was being bought over by his sham of a gentleman's behavior.

"Of course, I don't mind." Her voice held a cheerful slant to it. "I'm just happy she finally found love. After her last relationship, I was scared she'd grow old lonely with cats."

If that was meant to be a joke. It wasn't funny. "Mom!"

She chuckled and waved me off with the flick of her wrist. "I'll leave you too to your quality time but don't stay too long else you might catch a cold."

"Thank you, Mrs. Sterling." Killian acknowledged, and the moment she exited the terrace, the chain holding all my pent up frustration broke loose

"What the hell was the meaning of that?!"

"What?" He asked, his calm demeanor most likely meant to annoy me.

"God I feel like kicking you in the balls right now Killian! You made me look stupid in front of my mother, and what gave you the right to approach her before I did?! Was this part of your big thought-out plan! We're you going to pull out your contributions if I hadn't agreed to marry you?! How far did you think this huh?! Tell me!"

He clucked his tongue, treating me like I was a child. "You should calm down before your blood pressure shoots up again."

My fist balled up, my anger growing to immeasurable lengths. "Aren't you even going to explain yourself! You know, this controlling side of you is starting to wear on me. And I fucking hate it! I hate it! I hate you right now!"

"What's your problem?" He shot at me. "Your mother was going to lose her retirement home had I not stepped in. I helped."

"Fuck that, Killian, you have no right to butt into the affairs of my life more than I allow you to! Stop caring about problems that aren't yours!"

"Do you think I care?" He laughed humorlessly. "I wouldn't give a fuck if that damn building burnt down to the ground. Do you think I enjoy throwing my money into meaningless endeavors? No, I don't. I did it because for this plan to work, the dots have to fit. Don't you get it?"

My gut sunk and my anger deflated, immediately replaced by extreme sadness. My hormones were screwing with me right now. I was becoming misty-eyed but I did not want to cry. Now was not the right time to cry. "So you're toying with us then?" My voice broke. "Like we're some pawn in your game? Is it because we're not as rich as you are so it's easy for you to treat us how you want?"

"Hope," he closed the distance between us, towering over me with his brooding physique. "Don't let your emotions cloud your reasoning and think this through rationally."

I sniffed, pouring all my resentment and anger into my next words. "Maybe that's your problem, you don't have emotions, Killian, you don't feel and you don't consider others before you act, you're toxic and I hate you right now, I hate you so much that I actually feel sorry for your mother because she's had to live with you as a son. She should be freaking ashamed of you because right now I am."

My chest rose and fell as I heaved for breath, maybe I was a little harsh, maybe I had gone too far but I wasn't taking back my words, he deserved every bit of it, he deserved—

"My mother is dead."

His words made my breath shake.

He didn't say anything after that. He just pulled away from me, his eyes swallowed by what looked like grief.

"Killian..." I murmured, but he didn't even look at me. God, I shouldn't have said that.

"I think we should call it a night here." His voice was thick. "When you get home, pack what you can. We're leaving tomorrow." With that, he ambled towards the terrace door and when he reached it, he stopped to look over his shoulders at me. "Good night, Hope." And then he was gone, leaving me feeling terrible.

Shit.