20

Chapter 20 (part 1)

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"C-can ... I ... court you, Sariel?" out of nowhere I said Aius while we were in the elevator.

"WHAT ?!" startled, I replied to him.

What the hell? Right?

"Why? What's with your reaction?" Aius laughed at me.

"T*nga ka ba? Hello, we just broke up with my boyfriend and then you'll be dating right away?"

"What's wrong with that? As if you have a boyfriend? Then you said that your boyfriend broke up with you, so there's nothing wrong with me courting you."

"Ha! You're insane! Totally insane!" after I said that, the elevator opened just in time, a sign that we were on the right floor. I immediately went out and did not wait for him to answer what I said.

I felt him following me.

I was close to my hetol room when suddenly I was stopped by what I saw in front of my hotel room.

Right in front of my hotel room is Jared, who looked devastated as f*ck! He was leaning against the door and seemed to have been waiting there for a while.

When he looked up at me he immediately approached me.

"L-love, what do you mean on your text last night?" seemed to cry he said.

Ah, yeah right. I texted him last night. I broke up with him through text message. I know the immature of the way I break up with him. But I havr no choice, eh. I don't even want to grant him more. And one more thing I want because we will break up right away the moment I saw him doing some nasty things with Manager Lei.

I raised my eyebrow. "That I am breaking up with you?" supposed to be questioning I told him.

He immediately shook his head as if he would never accept what I said. "N-no, love please don't .. don't break up with me, please?"

I sighed, "Jared, please. I'm tired from work, don't make me even more tired."

I was about to pass when he suddenly grabbed me by the wrist and immediately leaned against the wall. He pressed a kiss to my lips.

And to my shock I pushed him hard, I was about to slap him when he suddenly fell on the pavement because of a blow to him.

I was stunned by what I saw and was a little stunned. "Aius!"

"Don't you dare kiss her!" Aius shouted furiously at Jared whose eyes were now glaring as well.

But Aius was still not satisfied, he immediately knelt on the floor and shook Jared then he punched him again with full force.

"Ah! Aius, stop it!" I screamed, how come Jared's face almost exploded with his blows.

"Aius, please!" not procrastinating. He was furious for no apparent reason, and when I couldn't think of anything to do, I just hugged his back and then I cried out of fear. "T-right please?" I said pleadingly while still sobbing.

And Aius seemed to stiffen when he heard me sob. The fist he was supposed to hit Jared in the face hung in the air.

He turned to me then he hugged me. "Shh, I'm sorry baby. Did I scared you, hmm?" Aius asked me calmly.

I just nodded, because I was really scared of what he did. What if he could kill Jared with his blows? Edi will he be imprisoned? I don't want that to happen to him.

Aius and I can just hug, and I know our appearance is a bit embarrassing because we're still in the hallway hugging, but I don't care. The pleasure of feeling Aius's hug. I feel safe and ... finally ... home. "

"T-tell me, Sariel ... Is he your boyfriend already?" suddenly someone spoke behind us. It was Jared who spoke.

I would have almost forgotten Jared if he hadn’t just spoken. "T-tell me, Sariel. Did you change right away?" again he asked.

"Jared, Aius is m—"

"I'm gonna court him, assh*le!" I hadn't finished what I was going to say when Aius spoke right away.

Jared didn't speak right away. But just a few minutes later we heard her soft laugh that seemed insulting. "You're going to court her?" he asked angrily to Aius.

"Yes." Aius said stiffly while his jaws tightened. She's crippling. "Aius, let's go." I tried to pull Aius into the hotel room I was occupying but he was stubborn. He didn't want to leave.

"Aius, I said let's go." I kept pulling at him.

Jared laughed again. "Believe me, he wouldn't allow you to court her." Jared's answer seemed very definite.

"You think, so? Then you're wrong." smiling, Aius's eyes widened in response.

"We're getting married." Jared replied, then he raised his hand, he showed a ring there that he was wearing.

I seemed to be stuck where I was when I saw the ring he was wearing! It was supposed to be the that I'll give on our anniversary! "H-how did you get t-that?" I asked while still stuttering.

"Oh! Come on, Love. I just saw your clothes. I didn't know that you're this sweet, huh?" Jared exclaimed angrily.

Then he forced himself to kneel. With his weakened body he forced himself to kneel in front of me, then he snatched something from his pants pocket.

I immediately figured out where I was standing when he pulled out a scarf there! The strength of my heartbeat! I was nervous and scared.

"W-will you ... marry me, Sariel?" Jared was still stammering when he said that.

I, on the other hand, could not answer.

This is ... this is what I've been waiting for him to do. He will propose to me. During the time we were in a relationship I was really waiting for him to propose to me.

If I was excited about the arrival of this day, now is not. If I had just imagined Jared proposing to me, I would have been thrilled. Now not anymore.

I no longer have the thrill to feel, I no longer have the excitement then, I no longer feel the joy. And most of all ... I no longer feel love for him.

Because what I just feel now is pure pain. Pain he caused me. In his deceptions of me.

"Mahal?" Jared nodded when I didn't answer. When I looked into his eyes it was glistening with hope.

I averted my eyes, and I met the eyes of Aius staring at me. Seems to be waiting for me to answer as well. There was sadness in his eyes, sadness that I didn't know what for.

"I ... I don't want to marry you, Jared." my voice answered weakly. I could clearly see her shoulders falling along with her tears.

"W-why? I thought you wanted to this? You waited for this, right?" Jared said tearfully to me.

"Yes, I've waited for this, Jared. But then, not now. I ... don't want to be married to you. After all that you've done. You cheated on me, Jared! And I can't accept it anymore! " crying that I also spoke to him.

He didn't answer so I just continued what I was going to say. "I've done too much for our relationship. I gave everything that I have. I became selfless because of my love for you. Maybe ... maybe this time ... I must give myself freedom, right? S-myself I'll think about it now. " after I said that I turned away. Aius immediately hugged me around the waist.

"I-I love you so much, Sariel. Please, just this one, give me another chance to prove it. Please." She said tearfully.

"You don't love me enough, then." my tears were already dripping especially when I remembered what I had just seen in the past.

"N-no ... I..I love you so much, Sariel."

"I said you don't love me. Because if you really do love me, you won't cheat on me with Manager Lei. You'll wait for me to give it to you. You'll be contented on what I can only give to you for now. "

"Believe me, Love. There's ... there's nothing between me and Lei. It was just ... just pure pleasure and lust. Yes, I bedded her but my heart is still yours. I'm all yours. She's just satisfying my needs, Sariel. "

My head immediately heated up at what I heard from Jared. So angry and glaring eyes I faced him.

"You fucking asshole! What do you think of manager Lei? A fucking toy? Something? Are you thinking, Jared? We're women, we're not something you'll use just because you need to! We're not toys to finish you use it and after you decide you'll throw it away right away when you're fed up! " furiously I replied to Jared then I turned my back on him right away.

Now, I don't know if I will be angry with Manager Lei or feel sorry for him. I know she's also a victim here, though she's also at fault. But I know, she's hurting too. I can feel it. That manager Lei loves Jared.

I was just shaken and was about to enter my hotel room when suddenly Jared spoke again for a question.

Question I don't know what to answer. Then I became true to my position.

"P-will you allow him to woo you? Will you trade him for me? Tell me, Sariel. If yes then I'll stop now. Will you be happy with him? If yes then I won't bother you anymore. I'll let you be happy with him. " Jared said after me.

I didn't answer right away. I don't know what to answer.

Yes or No?

Will I allow Aius or not?

I know, I feel safe and home whenever I'm with Aius. But was it right that I agreed? I just broke up with Jared. Aius and I have only known each other for a few weeks.

But will I agree? Isn't that ugly non? It just looks like I made Aius cover hole.

My mind says, no.

But my heart says, yes.

And I'm stuck in between.

What should I follow?

Is it my mind, who says no, because I just broke up with Jared?

Or ...

My heart who says, yes .. because it's beating for Aius, now?

I know I am starting to like — no love Aius. But I still can't b. My mind and heart is screaming for different answer.

I don't know what to follow between the two.

But whatever decision that I'll make, whatever my answer is ... I just wish that it won't hurt me in the end.

To be continued...