15

Manik

"Thank you for coming at such short notice, Dr. Mehta," I thanked the doctor, leading her to our room to check on Nandini.

She was lying on the bed where I had placed after she fainted a while back.

"That's quite ok, Mr. Sisodiya. Would you like to wait outside while I check on Mrs. Sisodiya?" She asked me.

Nodding at the doctor, I walked out of the room, letting her check on Nandini.

As I paced outside my bedroom, I felt a guilt creep into me as I remembered Nandini's teary face and voice.

'You fucked up big time, Manik. You really did.'

I could not deny my inner voice when it taunted me.

"Of all the girls I could have chosen to marry for my revenge, I chose this one. Why?" I felt angry at myself as her heartbreaking wails rang in my ears.

I took a few deep breaths, trying to eliminate the suffocating feeling.

"How could I have known she was an unwanted daughter by her parents? How could I have known she had been suffering at the hands of her parents since her birth? How could I have known her story? No, I am not at fault. I am not." I tried to reassure myself, but it didn't help.

The guilt bubbled inside me, and I could not dampen it. I could not remove the pinch I felt every time I remembered how I told her not to expect anything from me on our wedding night.

I recounted how devastated she had looked when I said she was the unwanted wife. I felt a pinch in my heart as I recalled that moment. "Fuck! Fuck!! Fuck!!!"

How fucking insensitive of me. I wonder how she must have felt at that moment. From being an unwanted daughter her entire life to being an unwanted wife.

No wonder she did not throw any tantrums or get mad at me when I announced she and our marriage meant nothing to me.

At that time, I thought she did it because she had ulterior motives. But now I understand she did it because she was used to it.

She was used to being unwanted all her life, so she simply accepted when I said the same thing.

"And I kept taunting her and kept reminding her of her status in my life." I shook my head, feeling like an idiot, as I recalled those taunts.

I was brought out of my reverie when I heard my bedroom door open. As Dr. Mehta walked out of the room, I walked to her. "How is she now?"

"Mrs. Sisodiya had a high fever, and she looked dehydrated too. I injected her with an antipyretic. That will get the fever down. I also suggest you put cold sponges over her forehead, hands, and feet, which would help reduce the fever.

"Once she wakes up, try to make her eat and drink to hydrate herself. Give her a tablet of paracetamol if her fever does not go down in the next six hours. I will come to check on her tomorrow morning," the doctor replied.

"Thank you, doctor." Saying that I was about to walk inside the room, but Dr. Mehta stopped me.

"Mr. Sisodiya. There is one other thing I need to talk with you about," she said, and I frowned at the seriousness in her voice.

"What is it, doctor?"

"While I was checking on her, she continued to mumble something. It was incoherent initially, but as I listened closely, it sounded like, 'Not my fault, and they hate me.' Is there something that is bothering Mrs. Sisodiya?"

"Umm, yes, she has been distressed about something lately. Why?"

"Because I think that distress is the reason behind her condition. If something is bothering her deeply, maybe she would like a consultation with a psychiatrist?" The doctor asked me, but I was unsure how to reply.

I have refused to give Nandini any rights of being my wife, and she has also made it clear she does not want to give me any rights as a husband. And I am sure she would not appreciate it if I rambled about her matters and past with others.

But I can't deny her need for a psychiatrist. After everything she has suffered, she needs therapy to hopefully move on from her past.

'That should be her decision, though. Not mine.'

Thinking that, I looked at Dr. Mehta and started speaking. "You are coming to check on her tomorrow, right? So, you can ask her about it tomorrow."

Dr. Mehta frowned as she heard me. "Can't you also ask her about it? Being her doctor, I will talk with her about it. But I am sure it would be received better if you also discussed it with her first."

'I am sure she will flip out if I even tried to interfere in her matter, let alone suggest her seeing a psychiatrist,' I thought, but I could not possibly tell that to Dr. Mehta.

"I think you should talk with her first," I said curtly, not wanting to discuss it further.

Taking the hint, Dr. Mehta nodded at me, and bidding her goodnight, I walked inside my room.

***********

Third Person's POV

Nandini slowly opened her eyes, hissing slightly as she felt her head throbbing with pain.

As she adjusted her vision to her surroundings, she sat up on the bed, leaning against the headboard as she did so.

She frowned as she saw Manik at the foot of the bed. He was sleeping with his upper body on the bed and lower body on the floor.

At first, she narrowed her eyes to why he was sleeping there but groaned lowly as she started getting flashes of what had happened last night.

She remembered how she had not been able to keep the hurt inside anymore. It had finally bursted out of her.

'Oh, no! What did I do? How could I tell everything to Manik? I should not have.' The thought ran through her mind as she squeezed her eyes shut and held her head.

"Do you have a headache?" The question startled Nandini, and she whipped her head up to see Manik now sitting at the foot of the bed.

"I am fine," Nandini replied to him in a low voice and was about to climb down from the bed, but Manik stopped her.

"Umm, after you fainted last night, I called the doctor, and she said you had a fever and dehydration. She injected you with the medicine for the fever and said you should hydrate yourself.

"I will ask our maid to bring you a glass of milk. Dr. Mehta will come later to check on you again," Manik said and started walking to the door.

"Wait, Manik," Nandini stopped him, and when he turned to her, she climbed down the bed. Steadying herself as she felt herself wobble due to weakness.

"I am sorry," she said to him, and Manik frowned.

"Are you saying sorry for slapping me? Well, although late, I have realized I kind of deserved it. I should not have said all those things to you," Manik said, slightly hesitating.

"Oh, I did not say sorry for slapping you. You are right. You did deserve it.

"I am apologizing because I should not have vented my feelings to you. We do not have any relationship whatsoever, and I should not have burdened you with my problems. I am sorry for that. It won't happen again," Nandini said to Manik.

Even though she has a headache and her entire body feels weak, even standing seeming like a big task, she cannot deny that she feels lighter today.

It might be because she finally cried her heart out and said everything she had suffered out loud. Keeping everything inside was eating her from within, and letting them out did have some positive effects.

Yes, the lingering hurt is still there. The pain is still there, and every memory still stings, but at least she feels she can handle it without breaking completely.

"That's good to know that you won't bother me with your sob story further," Manik said, and Nandini looked at him in disbelief for a couple of seconds before shaking her head.

"Why am I surprised? I should have expected that from you. I don't know why I thought you would at least show some compassion," Nandini said, feeling a pinch in her heart at Manik's behavior but trying to shrug it off.

"Well, once a jerk, always a jerk, right?" Manik told Nandini and was about to leave the room when he turned to her as he reached the door.

"Mom and Dad returned last night from their trip. They had come to meet you but got worried when I told them you had a fever and were resting. If you can, go and meet them.

"And one more thing. When are you coming to the office? You have been on leave after that one day when you showed up. Do tell me if you are no longer interested in working there. I will hire someone else."

Nandini wanted to refuse him outright, not wanting to work under such an arrogant person, but she held herself back. She cannot afford not to work when she has so much to accomplish before being able to leave this house.

"I will join starting tomorrow," Nandini said, smiling wryly at Manik. "Thank you for being you. If I had mistaken you for being compassionate, I could have grown to like you, at least as a person, even after everything that has happened between us."

"You are welcome," Manik said, a taunting edge in his voice as he walked outside the room.

Reaching the staircase, Manik looked back at his bedroom door, a sad smile on his lips. "I do not deserve to be liked even as a person by you, Nandini. After everything I did to hurt you, I can only repent by helping you move on from your past. And for that, I need to continue being a jerk to you."