Chapter 47 Remain hidden

“I’m sorry,” Joana said. “I only came here to collect the water. I don’t know why you showed me this, but I didn’t need to see any of it. I have already read about it in Marylin’s diary.”

“I didn’t show them to you,” the river responded. “Your heart did, those visions provided answers to the questions your heart seeks. And there’s still more besides what you saw, there’s still a lot that happened that you don’t know about. I think you would be interested in seeing the remaining part of the vision.”

“Thank you, but I don’t think I’ll be interested in seeing anything that happened in the past. That’s why it’s in the past. I have all the answers I need now right here with me. I don’t think there’s anything else I need to know. I went in search of my own answers and I found the supreme council. The only thing I am interested in now is where I can find the rest of the ingredients so I can end this immortal life once and for all, that’s the most important thing I need to do, instead of finding more information about how Marylin lived her life when she was me. I am grateful to you for choosing me to access your water, but I think it’s time to get what I came here for and leave. I still have a long way to go, as I’ve only gotten two out of five ingredients. I hope you understand.”

“Very well,” the river’s voice still remained as calm and soothing as ever. “I understand that you need to go and reunite with your loved ones. And if you do not want to see anymore again then you may take the water and go. I wish you the best and I hope that you get what your heart wishes for.”

“Thank you,” Joana said to the river. She opened her small bag and brought out a little bottle, she took some of the water in it and put it back into the bag before standing up.

We will be going now, she took Derick’s hand and led him back through the path they had come. None of them said anything as they walked through the portal and back out into the north pole. They walked to an area where there was less raging of snow before taking off to head back to the castle.

***

After they arrived…

Derick checked the time from the large standing clock that stood in one of the castle halls. The sun had set not too long ago, this meant they had been in the spirit world for a whole day.

The castle was empty, of course Dana had left he and Joana alone in the castle again. He wanted to be with Joana again, but this time around he didn’t want sex. He felt it was time to talk about everything. As he headed over to her room, he remembered how things used to be when he would come to this room to see Marylin, before John got in the way of their relationship.

He entered her room and met her seated on the bed, looking at Marylin’s diary, deep in thought. Of course, the vision had affected her too. Seeing how they were once together made her imagine what would have happened if things lasted longer than they did between them.

“Hey Joana,” he said, startling her. She didn’t realize when he came in.

“Oh, come in Derick,” she said, quickly tucking the diary under her pillow. Too late, he had already seen her.

“Joana, I think it’s time we talked.”

“Talked about what Derick?”

“You know, us.”

Joana laughed; she knew she shouldn’t have put her hand into that river.

“There is no us Derick, and there is nothing to talk about.”

“Yes, there is,” he began to yell. He didn’t know if yelling would convince her that there was something to talk about, or if it would make him feel better that she gave a nonchalant attitude towards what he said even though he knew she cared as much as he did.

“Don’t you dare raise your voice at me Derick. Big deal, we both know about our feelings for each other, but that doesn’t mean there should be anything between us. We made a deal that we wouldn’t talk about it even if we did have sex, I don’t know why you’re bringing it up now all because the river made us see things we shouldn’t have.”

“I’m not saying there should be anything between us Joana, but what if you go back home and this affects your marriage, I mean will you be willing to get married to another man when you know you have feelings for me?”

“That’s the keyword there Derick, feelings. There’s nothing more than that between us, I am in love with Andrew, I always have been and I still am. So, if that’s what you came here to know, then you have your answer.”

Derick sighed, why did every single thing she said to him have to hammer a nail into his heart?

“You’re lying Joana, I can see it in your eyes, seeing us together there affected you as much as it affected me. You might blame what you feel for me on Marylin Lou, but you’re the one feeling them now whether you like it or not. So, they’re yours to deal with. And if you want us to keep silent about a matter that should be discussed, then have it your way.

He then left her room and headed to his, trying to mask the anguish he felt in his heart. She could do what she likes now for all he cared; he wouldn’t bring this up again, not after the way she had just spoken to him.