62

I sat frustrated in a heap of crumpled up, partly torn pieces of paper.

It had probably been two hours since Tyler had left me alone and although I had made good progress at first, when I reread it I had found that my thoughts had been jumping back and forth far too much. Probably no one would really be able to understand what I had written there. I even had some problems myself in understanding the idea behind some of the points.

So I was starting over. However, I hadn't gotten very far until I realized that I had gotten lost again.

I had probably chosen every possible beginning by now, but had never gotten too far.

"Hey Lily, I wanted to check on you." Tyler came back in and stood there, confused. His gaze slid away from me at the mess of crumpled and torn papers surrounding me. "Oh..." he

said and looked at me questioningly.

"Is everything okay?" He asked a little uncertainly, since he was probably aware that the question was actually unnecessary. I wouldn't be sitting in such a mess if everything was fine.

' I've made a decision,' I wrote on a new piece of paper and handed it to Tyler.

"Okay, what's the point? Can I help you?"

I held out my hand towards the note and Tyler handed it back to me.

' I have to become a werewolf,' I hastily wrote on the note and handed it back to Tyler, who had meanwhile also sat down on the sofa with me.

He read the note and frowned briefly.

"Yes." He stretched out: "Sometime."

I took a deep breath in and out and then shook my head slightly.

"I... I don't quite understand what you want to tell me.", was the only answer I got.

I grabbed the piece of paper again.

' Not sometime , but Zeinah. This or next full moon

Tyler looked at me in absolute irritation.

,,I do not quite understand. I mean, we both agreed that you didn't want that, especially any time soon."

' I don't want to either, but it's the only way we have'

" Why?" he asked, "Is someone pushing you? You know you have all the time in the world."

'No, I haven't. As a human, I'm far too weak and the pack needs a Luna. You alphas won't search so excessively for your companions for nothing if it were n't really important '

By now, Tyler was reading along with what I wrote. It seemed to be taking too long or he really wanted to know what I had to say or write. Even if I only told him half the truth right now. I kept the story about the twins' mate to myself. The topic would only lead to uncomfortable questions anyway.

"Lily, you really don't need to worry. There really is time for everything." Tyler must have tried to calm me down.

'But you want it too'

" Lily, it's your life. I would never force you against your will."

' Be honest with me. Would n't you prefer it if I could stand by your side now as a werewolf?'

"Please Lily, it's your choice. I just want you to be happy."

' How could I be happy if you 're not ?'

" I don't quite understand... I'm happy after all, you're by my side right now."

' But you could be happier if I finally turned and could help you with your chores too'

After I finished writing, I looked at Tyler. He was still staring at the sheet of paper and said nothing.

I lay still in Tyler's arms. He still wasn't really convinced about the idea of ​​transforming me. You could definitely see it on him. It probably bothered him far less that walking itself, but that he knew very well that I didn't really want it. And if we're being honest, it really was a bit crazy. I was insisting on something that both of us, and probably the whole pack, knew I didn't want. If I ever really wanted to, I would probably be a werewolf by now.

But just the thought of turning into an oversized wolf made me shudder. If I didn't know better, you'd think it was impossible. After all, humans and wolves are two very different creatures, the only thing that probably had in common was that both were mammals. Just what was apparent from the outside was already beyond common sense, so I really didn't want to imagine what was happening in the body during the transformation. The relationship between some body parts in human and wolf form was immense in some cases.

Tyler rubbed my back. For the umpteenth time, he whispered softly in my ear: "You don't have to do that." But like the times before, I shook my head. From a purely logical point of view, being a werewolf meant for me, as well as for some other people, straight and with a view to the future advantages that should not be underestimated.

There was a knock at the door. "Come in!" Tyler called and the door opened shortly after. One of the twins was standing in the doorway.

"Hey, I wanted to apologize on behalf of Luke. Somehow everyone seems to get hurt worse these days. Both pack doctors are fully engaged."

"All good Jared. Do you want to sit down or do you have to go back to your companion?" A little uncomfortable Jared looked back into the hallway. "Well, I would have a moment. Luke is there if anything should happen." You could tell that he wanted to go back straight away, but he sat down with us for a moment.

"You don't have to stay here," Tyler said to him. "No, no, I'm fine. After all, I'm your beta. Even if I let my duties slide a bit from the start. Not that the pack yet comes up with the idea that there is a conflict between us. That would not do the mood in the pack any good."

Annoyed, Tyler huffed once and rolled his eyes. ,,My goodness! Did you agree somehow? Why do you all feel like you have to put up with others right now?!"

Jared looked at Tyler confused: "I don't quite understand what you mean. Who am I supposed to talk to?"

"Well, with my companion who's lying on top of me. She's got it in her head that for the good of everyone else, she needs to become a werewolf as soon as possible."

"What?" Jared remarked even more confused. Then thought about Tyler's words for a moment.

"Wait, does that mean..." Tyler interrupted his beta with a growl, then he stopped speaking, but seemed a lot happier. I'd probably be pretty confused right now if I couldn't figure out what it's about .The mate of the two twins.

After a few seconds, however, Jared seemed to have found something to talk about: "But I don't quite understand what your problem is?" "You don't want it at all!" "Tyler, please be realistic. In our entire history, there have been maybe a dozen or so people who really wanted to turn into a werewolf. The vast majority have always been forced, and while your mate doesn't really want it, you don't have to force her. This makes her a huge exception. She's right about that. For many in the pack it would be better if she were a werewolf and could go about her duties as Luna."

Tyler just growled, but more frustrated than aggressive since Jared didn't share his opinion.