Retreating Feelings.

Ever since Jay found that Yvette is having a secret affair with someone online, their relationship has been going down hill. He clearly saw the message on her screen " I like your taste". But instead of confronting her squarely, he had just withdrew himself

He never calls or texts when he's on a trip. They do meet for sex, but it was clear Jay was only satisfying his libido and had no more feelings for Yvette. The energy of hot sex was no more there. Been had suddenly gone silent, and unreasonable. Yvette couldn't bear her urges for good sex. She resorts to continue her online satisfaction with nicodermis. She logged in, and tried to reach him severally, but all of a sudden he too had gone mute. Yvette couldn't control her urges for hot feelings.

Yvette took a deep breath from the smells of the ingredients. She prepared the pans to mix up a nice calming body scrub, to get rid of all the negativity that was piling up on her heart.

The words “Italian” and “Hairy” circulated in her mind.

She contacted other Psychic Advisors as well, and it seemed that everyone is singing the same song in unison, that she needed to leave Ben behind. By this time, she was so saddened by this information, and the row of consequential confirmations. And although she knew deep down inside that it was the right thing to do, she also felt from the bottom of her heart that she definitely didn’t want to meet anyone at a bar. She really had enough of the old, creepy, aggressive losers wanting in her panties, and the young, empty-headed stallion wannabes who in fact had no idea what they want for real. But she was also sick and tired of driving 80 miles for a date that has been set online. “Forget that. Forget it all. The past may be hazy, with a rollercoaster relationship of sorts, but there’s no place for the future resembling a typical single, partying, dating lifestyle either” she concluded.

Days passed, mediation and prayer continued, and one morning she woke up to a voice:

“Put your profile back online and wait.”

It was not unusual for her to hear a suggestion, crystal clear. Sometimes she felt it as an echo of her own subconscious, suddenly radiating back to her from the high halls of the universe. Other times it appeared as a straightforward, conscious thought, and she just slowly realized. Seconds later, wouldn’t be able to weave that particular string of meaning in her mind so quickly and effortlessly only by herself. And, quite simply, sometimes she got guidance. She has been in a special contact with several Psychic Advisors, spiritual guides anyway, sometimes she felt something from one of them, and sometimes they referred to receive emotions or experiences transmitted from her. She just woke up with this thought, so she could not decide if it was the last remnant of her dream, or her first, conscious thought - or something else entirely.

Her sister, Sybil who knows her inside and out, wrote the profile for her - the eye of the beholder can describe the image what others see more clearly than she could describe herself by her own judgment. Yvette thought it is a funny plan, but she was quite happy with the results herself.

“I vowed to myself, I don’t want to meet a guy at the bar, I want the one who is supposed to teach me, love me, and grow with me. I wanted someone like my dad, a deep connection, and I would know him when I met him.” She told that to Sybil, Grace, and several of her guides as well, when talking about online dating.

She received 75 hits, 24 emails on the first day only, but no profiles that she could even reconcile with. No connection whatsoever.

She took a deep breath and did an advanced search, based on Taurus, her father’s zodiac sign. One profile was honest and forth-coming and the other profile: the pictures told a story. Yvette loved stories. This guy was the one - Yvette could feel the connection through the pictures. He seemed genuine and honest.

She did the unthinkable from her perspective and winked at them both. Although it was perfectly normal on a dating site, that members show their openness towards several other members privately - after all, they are there to get to know someone in real life, there is no such thing as cheating on someone you are not even together with… or is there? Yvette always kept her interactions to a minimum, and when she started messaging with someone, she immediately dropped communications with all other members. It was like from the very second that something clicked in her, she handled the applicant as the actual candidate for being the one, the one she could create that special, deep relationship she is looking for with.

But no matter how high she regarded her own instincts, how she tried to follow them, sometimes they did fail her. The guy he felt strong connection with, well, the first few messages were disappointing, their correspondence got less and less frequent, and faded into disinterest. The other guy with the storytelling pictures, well, he never replied.