Chapter 68

~Eliana~

I grabbed Alistair’s hand, and held it firmly, figuring that if I let him leave just like that, he was never going to show up in my presence again, and for Ian’s sake, I couldn’t risk that happening.

He seemed stunned, as he stopped right in his tracks, without even trying to resist the hold my hand had on him. Slowly, he looked up at me, and his eyes met mine.

From his expression, I could tell how shocked and confused he was by my sudden behaviour, which he had obviously not expected. He was probably wondering if I had had a change of heart and decided to forgive him, but the reason I had stopped him wasn’t because I wanted to forgive him, and left for me, I would have expressed a whole lot of gratitude to him for making the wise choice to leave my life alone and stay the hell away from me.

However, I couldn’t just let him go even though I certainly didn’t want to have him anywhere around me. Ian needed his father; Ian needed him, and if he thought he could just walk away from his responsibilities, then he was wrong about that, because I wasn’t going to let him do that.

“Where do you think you’re going?” I asked, in a firm voice, eyeing him from head to toe.

“I already told you that I have to leave,” He said.

I released the hold my hand had on his, and scoffed. “So, you’re just going to walk away from your duty as a father?” I inquired.

“Eliana, your family made me realise that I am just a sperm donor. I am not fit to be a father,” He said.

“Do you think anyone is fit to be a parent?” I asked him, shooting him a glare.

“El...”

“Answer the goddamn question. Is there anyone who is perfect to fit in the role of a parent?” I asked him once again.

He heaved a deep sigh, and appeared to be thoughtful for a moment. “I don’t know,” He later said, with a shrug of his shoulders.

“Well, I do know, and I’ll give you the answer to the very question I asked you. The truth is, Alistair, no one is fit to be a parent. We are all too broken and damaged, and majorly unfit in several ways than one. Having a child is scary, because you just want to give that child a better life than you had, but with your flaws, you’re scared you wouldn’t be able to do that. You feel unfit to raise a child, but at the end of the day, you do so anyway.

“You know what I’ve learnt? Every sane parent wants the best for their child, and they’ll at least try to be perfect for the sake of their child, even in all their imperfections. My parents weren’t the best, and I spent so many years hating them, when all they wanted to do was to keep me safe. I condemned their approach, but someone else will appreciate it. That’s how it goes,” I said.

“What exactly are you trying to say here?” He asked.

“All I’m trying to say is that every parent isn’t the best, but at least, they try to be the best for their child’s sake. If anyone fails at being a parent even after trying hard, it’s better than anyone who just doesn’t try and abandons their child,” I said.

“I’m not abandoning my son,” He said, almost raising his voice at me.

“Then, what exactly are you doing? Not abandoning him? You are throwing your hands up in the air and walking away from your son who clearly needs a father, and you say you’re not abandoning him? What then are you doing, Alistair? What then?” I fired at him.

“He deserves to have a better father than me,” He argued.

“Well, I guess it’s too bad that I can’t find a better werewolf than you to take care of my son...our son!” I yelled.

“What?” He questioned, with confusion written all over his face.

“You don’t get it, do you? Ian doesn’t just need a father. He needs a werewolf, and that’s why we came back to Los Angeles,” I told him.

“You’re not hitting the nail on the head, Eliana. What are you trying to say?” He asked.

I looked around, making sure no one was present or eavesdropping on our conversation. “Ian triggered his werewolf abilities,” I said in a very low tone.

“He did what?” Alistair asked, with his eyes wide in surprise.

“Keep your voice down, will you?” I commanded, in a hushed tone.

“I’m sorry. When did he trigger it? How was he even able to do that? Most importantly, why did he do it?” Alistair asked, in a tone which sounded more like a whisper.

“He did it sometime last week, I don’t know how he did it, but he did it to save someone’s life. She was dying, and he needed her to be alive, so, he took away her pain unknowingly, and although everyone says it’s a miracle, Ian is the one to be thanked that she’s still alive today,” I responded.

An impressed smile appeared on Alistair’s face. “He did it for a good reason, you know. I know I shouldn’t say this, but I’m extremely proud of him,” Alistair said.

I wore a half-smile. “He’s a good boy. If you knew him better, you’d be more proud of him, but apparently, you don’t seem to want to know him better,” I said.

“I want to know him better, Eliana, but you and I know that he’s not interested in seeing me ever again,” He said.

“You’ll let him decide? Ian wants to have a father, I know that for a fact, but hearing what my family says about you has really made him opposed to the idea. However, he’s still young, and he can easily be won over. If you try hard enough, you may have him calling you ‘father' in no time, but if you don’t take this chance right now, it may be too late when you come to your senses and decide to locate your first son. When he grows up, he will see you as the father who betrayed his mother and abandoned him at a time he needed him the most,” I said.

“I don’t get it, Eliana. You hate me, so, why do you suddenly care about me seeing my son?” He asked.

“The only reason I’m standing here and talking to you is because your son, Ian needs you. Otherwise, I couldn’t care less if you wanted to see him or not,” I explained in all honesty.

“He needs me?” He asked.

“Of course, he needs you, dummy. Did you miss the part where I said he triggered his werewolf abilities? Who’s going to teach him how to control his abilities and use them properly? Is it me?” I retorted.

“Wait. So, that’s why you came back,” He noted.

“Apparently. So, tell me, are you still keen on walking away from your son, or will you be a man and try to get him on your side?” I asked.

He sighed, biting his lower lip, as he appeared deep in thought. “I have no other choice. I’ll try to get him on my side even if it’s the last thing I ever get to do,” He said.

“Now, you’re speaking reasonably,” I said.

“Yeah, I guess. What are we going to do? The full moon is in two days time,” Alistair said.

“I know. When someone or something annoys him, he changes, and during our flight back home, I even had to place him on a sedative because I was scared he might cause a scene. Yesterday, after hearing what my relatives said, he was okay for a while, then kept on asking me if he was truly a monster who deserved to be killed. When I told him he wasn’t, he said I was lying and he exploded right before me. I had to try to calm him down, but I know I won’t be able to do that on the full moon, and I don’t even want my family to know about it, so, my hands are tied. As his father, you should take care of him on that day. I’ll bring him to your place. I hope that’s okay with you,” I said.

Alistair nodded his head. “I will do just that. Forgive my curiosity, but I must ask: What exactly did your relatives say?” He asked.

I heaved a sigh. “That is none of your concern. It’s a family affair, and you should stay away from it,” I said.

“I’m sorry. Then, let me ask something entirely different. Would you have come to see me if we hadn’t bumped into each other the other day?” He asked.

I nodded my head, in the affirmative. “Of course, I would have come. I was planning on even coming to see you after I returned from the mall. It’s not like I have a choice,” I told him.

“You do. You could have met Garrett,” He said.

“Then, Garrett would have still informed you about it. Besides, you’re an Alpha,” I said.

“Are you sure that’s the only reason?” He inquired.

“I’m sorry, what are you trying to insinuate?” I asked him, folding my arms underneath my breasts.

He came closer to me, and touched my cheek, which made my heart skip.

“What are you doing?” I asked him.

“Why did you cut your hair?” He asked, coming even more closer to me.

“Why did you start keeping beards?” I fired back at him.

He rolled his eyes. “I asked you a question first,” He said.

“Well, that’s none of your business,” I replied.

“You looked much more prettier with your long hair,” He said to me.

I scoffed. “How I look shouldn’t be any of your business, Alistair. Now, get your hand off me,” I said, slapping away his hand that had been on my cheek, causing me to have sensations I didn’t want to have.

“I’m sorry if I crossed the line, but are you sure you came back just for the sake of our son? You didn’t want to see me?” He asked.

“Trust me, seeing you is the one thing I never hoped for. However, for Ian’s sake, I’d go to the moon and back. I hope that answer meets your satisfaction,” I told him.

“I guess I took my hopes up a little too much. You’re never going to forgive me, are you?” He inquired.

“You know I’m never going to do that,” I told him.

“Well, I already told you how sorry I am, but I also want to say I’m thankful that you trust me with our child. I’m thankful that you let me see him, and you’re going to let me help him with his werewolf abilities. More importantly, I’m thankful that I got the chance to see you once again,” He said.

“I guess I should say you’re welcome,” I told him.

“Um... Can I get your number? I need it, so that we can communicate about issues relating to Ian,” He explained.

I smelt no foul play, and I saw reasons with him, so, I took his phone and punched in my newly acquired phone number.

“Thank you,” He said.

“It’s okay. I’ll bring him to you on the day of the full moon, and I’ll let you know when we’re coming. You may go now,” I said to him.

He nodded his head, and gestured that I should go ahead and leave, probably wanting to see me get inside first before turning around.

I heaved a sigh, and began walking away. The bastard couldn’t even tell me a simple goodbye. He knew now that I needed him, and he was probably going to start feeling like a superstar. Anyways, I was prepared to cut his wings if he ever felt like an eagle.

“Eliana,” He called.

I stopped, and partly turned around, so that my eyes could meet his.

“Take care,” He told me.

I nodded my head, then turned back around, and began waking away, with a smile on my face. I didn’t know why, but my heart felt warm as I remembered he was watching me leave. He still cared about me, and that was sweet to know, but he had once made my heart ache, and I wasn’t prepared to forgive that or even forget about it.

I was only talking to him because of Ian, and I was going to keep reminding myself about that, in order not to be swayed by his sweet behaviour and develop a soft spot for him once again.