CHAPTER 46

“Want another drink?” I ask Noel as he lounges on my couch and takes the final swallow of his scotch. He flew in about an hour ago, and we’re waiting for Jasmine to arrive to go out to dinner tonight. My nerves are on edge. I definitely want another drink.

“Nah, man,” Noel says as he pushes up from the couch and moves to take his glass back into the kitchen that opens straight from the living room. “Tonight’s not about getting drunk. It’s about hanging out with my two favorite people in the world.”

I smile at him and nod, my stomach clenched.

“But just so you know,” he says with a laugh. “Jasmine’s my first favorite, you’re my second.”

“As it should be,” I reply, and hope that sounds casual enough.

Noel rinses his glass out and sets it on the counter. As he walks back into the living room, he says, “And besides… I figure tomorrow night, you and I are going to hit the town, right?”

“You know it,” I say as I push up from the chair, head straight to the wet bar, and replenish my vodka. There is not enough alcohol in the world to get me through this weekend. I take a healthy slug as soon as I cap the bottle.

“Dying to go to The Sinful Night Cub,” Noel says with excitement in his voice. “Want to meet Ford, too. He and I have been emailing about testing out some more of my designs in his club. Plus, you and me, dude… we haven’t had a woman together in a long time. Your stories about the stocks… we’ve got to hit that, man.”

My shoulders tighten and my gut rolls with nausea. How in the fuck I am going to weasel out of this is beyond me, but I’ve got to figure something out. I don’t want another fucking woman other than Jas.

“Alex?” Noel says in question, and I turn to look at him. “We good with going there tomorrow night?”

“Damn straight we are,” I say with a smile. “A night of debauchery for the both of us.”

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

Just then, the elevator doors give a slight hiss as they open, and Jas is standing there. She looks fucking amazing, wearing a dress done in large black-and-white zebra stripes that’s loosely belted around her waist and comes down to her knees. She’s got on a pair of sexy-as-shit taupe heels to go with it and my mouth waters as I take in what they do to her legs. Hair in that sleek, angled bob that hangs halfway in between her jaw and shoulders, and that thick crop of bangs straight across her eyebrows make her green eyes brighter than ever.

I swallow hard and try to appear casual.

Her eyes go immediately to Noel, and she gives a squeal of excitement. He rushes to her, picks her up, and swings her around. The skirt of her dresses rises a bit in the back, and I look away guiltily.

“God, I missed you, squirt,” Noel says with a choked voice. My guilt intensifies over the naked display of love and affection he has for his sister.

Jasmine’s voice quavers with equal love. “I missed you, too.”

She hugs him hard and looks over his shoulder at me. Her eyes are wary and nervous.

When Noel releases her, I step up and casually say, “Got a hug for me?”

It’s a shameless move to touch her, but not something that would raise Noel’s eyebrows. I’ve hugged Jas a million times over our lives together growing up.

“It’s good to see you again,” she says to me as she walks into a very brotherly hug. I make the mistake of inhaling her scent, and I’m hit with a jolt of lust for her.

After we quickly release each other, she steps back and surveys my apartment as if it’s her first time. She told Noel we met for breakfast one day, but he sure as shit doesn’t know I’ve fucked her on almost every piece of furniture in this apartment. He’ll never know she went to her knees right where we’re standing in front of the elevator and swallowed every drop of cum I gave her.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

I have an overwhelming urge to fake a stomachache, a migraine, a goddamn stroke for all I care at this moment, and beg off from this entire weekend.

Instead, I put a smile on my face and tell them, “Come on. We’ve got prime seats in Moulineaux tonight. I’ve not eaten there yet, but heard it’s amazing.”

Jas smiles back at me before turning to hook her arm through Noel’s. She leans over and puts her head on his arm as she’s too short to reach his shoulder. They both stroll into the elevator.

This night can’t get over with fast enough for me.

***

“God, I’m stuffed,” Jasmine says as she licks the last of her chocolate mousse off her spoon and thank God, we’re sitting at the table so no one can see my arousal. I’m not sure what it says about me that I’ve been like this most of the night, just sitting across the table from this beautiful creature.

“This was really good,” Noel says in agreement as he pushes his own empty dessert flute away. He picks up his scotch, which I think might be his fourth of the night, and swirls it around before taking a sip. So much for not drinking tonight.

When he sets it back down, he turns to Jas and asks, “Have you decided on anything with Peter?”

I immediately tense up at the personal question leveled at his sister right out of the blue, and I guess the liquor is making him too loose with his words.

“We’ve talked a little,” she says easily, but I notice the tightness just around the corners of her mouth. “He wants me to come back.”

Noel doesn’t know the details of what happened. Only Alma and I know Peter kicked her out of the home because he didn’t like her performance in bed. Jas only told him that they separated per Peter’s request and he asked her to leave.

“And are you?” Noel presses her.

Her eyes cut to mine before going back to her brother. “Now’s probably not the best time to talk about it.”

“Why not?” Noel says, turning to look to me for a moment, then back to Jas. “I’m your brother. Alex is as good as a brother. We care about you.”

God, I want to shoot myself.

Jasmine nods and gives a confident smile. “Well, okay… in that case, I don’t think I’m interested in reconciling. I’ve been using this time on my own to evaluate what I want, and I’m pretty sure it’s not marriage to Peter.”

“He hurt you,” Noel says tenderly. “I get that. Some things can’t be undone.”

Jasmine’s eyes turn soft as they soak in her brother’s words, and then I’m fucking ripped wide open when she says, “Peter doesn’t want children. We might have been able to repair everything else, but it’s something I very much want one day.”

Noel’s hand crosses the table and takes Jasmine’s. He squeezes it and leans toward her. “You would make a fucking fantastic mother. You get back out there, find the love of your life, and make beautiful babies, okay? I can’t wait to be an uncle.”

Jasmine’s smile back to him is bright, and there’s no tightness at all around her mouth now. “I will, Noel. I promise.”

I swear to God I’m going to throw up. How could I not know this about Jas? I’ve had my cock in her ass, my cum in her pussy, but I didn’t know how she strongly she wanted children. I mean… I assumed she might, but I had no clue it was a bone of contention with her husband. It goes far deeper than I ever imagined.

Moreover, how in the hell can I keep this up with her when she wants so much out of life, and I can’t be the one to give it to her?

But man, if we had babies together, they’d be stunning.

I shake my head and stand up from the table in a little lurch. My head swims with the implications of what I’m doing with Jas and what she’s failing to get. Peter is a non-issue to me now. I’d worried I was perhaps blocking her from her soul mate or something, but it’s clear he’s not the guy for her.

It’s even clearer I’m not the guy, either. Or at least, I can’t be that guy for her. Noel wouldn’t understand.

Or would he? my subconscious pipes up.

I ignore it and toss my napkin on my chair. “I’m going to use the restroom. Be right back.”

Both Noel and Jas smile at me. Noel totally nonplussed, but I can see the worry for me in Jasmine’s eyes. She knows that conversation just bothered me, but I can never tell her how much or why.

I make my way through the restaurant to where the restrooms are located. I do nothing more than splash chilly water on my face and stare at myself in the mirror, telling me to get my shit together. This shouldn’t be this hard.

But I once told Jas she was complicated, and it appears that is the understatement of the fucking millennium.

With a sigh, I take a towel from the attendant, dry my face and hands, and put a five-dollar bill in the tip jar. He bobs his head and says, “Thank you, sir. Enjoy the rest of your evening.”

Yeah, that’s not going to fucking happen, but I smile back at him as I leave.

I come to a dead halt as I find Jas there waiting for me in the alcove that separates the restrooms from the open restaurant layout.

“What are you doing here?” I ask her as I take her arm and step toward the wall, further shielding us from the patrons.

“Checking on you,” she says quietly. “I know this is hard—”

“It’s fine,” I assure her. “It’s fine, and Noel doesn’t suspect anything.”

“I want to tell him,” Jas says suddenly.

I look left and right; the coast is clear, and I lean into her. “We agreed not to, Jas. Don’t do this to me.”

“He’d understand,” she promises.

“He wouldn’t,” I return.

“Alex—”

“Jas,” I snap. “You know that dildo machine in The Sinful Night Club?”

She nods back at me, lips pressed tight.

“Your brother designed it,” I tell her in a low voice. “I took a picture of your fine ass as that dildo hammered into you, and I texted it to Noel so he could see his machine in action.”

Jasmine’s mouth falls open in stunned surprise.

“You think he’s going to appreciate the fact that was his sister I was exploiting? Fuck… I sent that picture to him knowing he’d probably jack off to it. How do you think that’s going to make him feel?”

“Oh, God,” she says as her eyes practically glaze over from the implications and she stumbles back to rest against the wall.

“Leave it be, Jas,” I beg. “Please let’s just get through this weekend.”

She nods at me, her eyes still a little blank. It shreds me up seeing her look so lost.

I press into her. For a moment, I don’t give a fuck about Noel. I brush my lips over hers and whisper, “It will be fine. I promise.”

“Okay,” she whispers back.

But we both know that’s a lie, no matter how this turns out.