The Player who Gets Played 25. Letting Go

Louise's POV

We were staying in bed and enjoying each other's company, I was in his shirt while he was back to his boxer briefs and nothing else.

"Thank you for the coffee." He said while kissing the side of my neck.

"Mm..hmm...welcome, I don't usually serve coffee in bed for my guests but I'll make an exception for you," I said to him giggling when his kisses started to go lower.

"I'd be very upset if you do. Have I told you that I'm a very jealous man? I couldn't even start to imagine. So just don't."

He kissed me sensually slow making my toes curl in delight, seconds later I started moaning his name. But then he groaned when his phone was buzzing and ringing on the side table. I smiled at him and told him to answer it, while I relaxed back to my pillow.

"Mom...yes, I'm meeting Clara this afternoon. No, she has some paperwork for me to sign."

Allen was still talking o the phone when my mind wandered off aimlessly. I couldn't believe that we fucked without a condom. But I was so upset with myself, that I get carried away with our lovemaking...crap!

I don't love him...

I don't...stop this Lou!

You won't be fooled!

Not for the second time...

Suddenly I was out of breath, panic attack.

Damn it, Lou!

You're a woman now

It's been years ago...

Getting myself out of bed, I quickly got to the bathroom passing Allen who looked at me but was still on the line.

Trying to exhale in longer intervals, I adjusted and make more attempts to control my breathing. But I kept on coming with short shallow breaths. I tried to focus on something else when Adam's words flow through my mind just like it was just yesterday.

"Louise, I love you. She meant nothing, we were just fucking. Maybe you should eat less, and make yourself more presentable for me..."

My hands were shaking when I try to grab the faucet, wanting to wash my face and hoping to wash the panic out.

No...not again...

"Hey, Lou baby? I'm coming in..." he knocked on the bathroom door, before coming inside.

He must've seen my panic face, but he didn't say anything he just engulfed me in his arms and rubbed my back repeatedly. I was trying to calm myself down, but my feelings were exploding inside me. He was breaking down my wall, years of cementing, and building up my wall had gone the instant he took me into his embrace.

"I hate you...I don't want this, I don't want to love anyone anymore, I don't want to love you..." I finally breakdown and sobbed on his chest.

"I'm sorry baby...but I won't hurt you, I won't... we're doing this your way, as slow as you want..."

He carried me back to the bed and cuddled me in his arms. He was not letting me go, not until his stomach growl making me laugh.

"So, you're good now? Cause I need some food and I'm taking you out, I'm not leaving you alone." He asked looking at me seriously.

I'm good, I love him.

And I'm freaking terrified.

I nodded at him, still couldn't make myself utter the words. He cupped my face and kissed my temple softly.

"Okay then, as much as I love seeing you in my shirt. But I need to get dressed."

Okay, Lou...get your ass up...

And let's do this.

You can do this.

I smiled at him and strip myself off of his shirt. Slowly. That was one of the things that I mastered for the past few years. He was looking at my naked body when I give him the shirt and walked away from him. I could hear him curse lowly behind me.

Grinning widely I opened my drawers and start putting on my clothes. I was buttoning my blouse when he was wrapping his arms around my waist and started kissing the back of my neck.

Sighing in content I slithered my arm behind, reaching for his neck and pulling him down lower. His warm breath and his deep sexy voice make my heart fluttered. At that very moment, I was letting myself go and I finally told him.

"I love you too." I closed my eyes and breathed out my words, seconds later he pulled my back flat to his chest. My wall was no longer there, I was done suppressing my feelings for him. He might ruin me, but at that moment I wanted him. I wanted him to know that I love him too, I was letting myself go for him.

He didn't say anything back, but he turned me around to face him. His thumb stroked my cheek, his other hand holds my neck possessively and he kissed me. Our lips molded, our tongues tasted each other. We stopped, breathless but then start kissing again within seconds.

I could feel his love surging through his kisses, he was gentle yet demanding at the same time. My heart was beating faster, I was wanting more of him. We were stripping each other clothes off and I push him to the bed and was on top of him straddling him.

"Lou...baby, condom..." his words were strained while his hands caressed my body sensually.

"I'm on my pills, I want to feel you. All of you..." I whispered seductively while nibbling on his ear.

Then he groaned louder when I push myself down to his erection. He cursed and hold my waist tight in his grip, then he thrust hard from under me taking me higher, making me moan his name louder.

He was pulling my body flat to his chest. His arms were holding my body tight, while he kept on thrusting himself from under me. Hard. Over and over again. I was moaning on the crook of his neck. He was breathing heavily on the side of my neck with every thrust while holding my body possessively above him.

He was hard and finally twitched as I clenched him tighter, feeling that I was getting too close to my climax.

"I'm going to...Allen, harder...again."

His hold on me was tight until he took me under him and start pushing himself deeper and harder. I was high instantly. He was groaning louder, and I was squeezing him harder inside me.

His kisses were rough, his breath was harsh. His hold on me was dominating, and I was wanting him even more for it.

He was licking and sucking my tits making me arched my back, and holding him close telling him to kiss me harder. He did just that, and parted my thighs wider with his knees and pound me harder. Repeatedly. Taking me so much closer to my climax.

Until he told me to let go "Now baby, come with me now!"

I did just that and we climaxed seconds apart. I could feel him burst inside me, and I was milking him as he lazily kissed my lips. He slowly pulled out and I could feel his cum trailing down my inner thigh.

"I love you Lou..." he breathed out and slumped next to my body.

I kissed his chest and told him that I love him too, then we rest in each other's arms for a while.

"We might as well shower, then we will leave for brunch," I told him as I get up showing him my naked ass, then parading my naked body walking to the bathroom.

He grunted and then took me into his arm, and carry me to the bathroom. I was giggling and back to screaming his name when he put me under the shower and let the cold water wash over me.

It took us another hour until we were finally out the door. I was actually hungry and wanted to leave the apartment quicker.

That early afternoon, I had the largest meal I've had in weeks. He was looking at me and smiling, as he watched me eat. It was a new feeling, and I was liking the way he observed me while I was devouring my food.

"You know it's not polite staring at your girlfriend, while she eats like a horse."

"Hmmm.... girlfriend, I'm liking that new title. And this boyfriend of yours had seen you in the most impolite manner, and I'm liking this view baby."

He took my free hand and kissed it, and with that gesture, I knew that I was letting myself go. I was not falling anymore, I was definitely and absolutely in love with him. And it made me grin at him and took another big bite of my steak.