Chapter 16

I tried to forget the face that would haunt me now forever. I could not curse my luck better. No wonder ma tells me to always be truthful. You lie once and then you get caught in the web of lies to hide your true face. I got so stressed that I went on mumbling without noticing the numerous people judging me to be crazy.

Rasik saw me walk in without the tapes and was ready to bully me more.

"Newbie, where are the tapes?" I had no sense of humour left within me.

"The librarian is searching and said he would give you a call as soon as he finds it. Till then he told me to ask you to come up with a better plan to bully me." I announced in front of the girl's group and few other reporters who were working in the cubicle. I did not want to shame Rasik, but my fiery mouth definitely did that. The damage was done. I got on the wrong foot with the most important man in the life of interns and I would have to repay it for time to come. Rasik didn't say a word but his eyes threw daggers at me. Mohit tried to save his face.

"Lunchtime girls. Why don't you have your lunch?"

The other girls got up on their feet immediately, fished out their wallets and made their way to the cafeteria. I simply tagged along. Swati was the first one to break the silence.

"You have any clue, what you got yourself into. It was a harmless prank that Rasik played on all of us. Why did you shame him in front of everyone?"

"I would apologize to him, first thing post-lunch. I will let him know I didn't mean to challenge him or anything."

"Better," Anjali stated.

What could I say in my defence? That the young man and his shining eyes had riled me up. I decided to keep my mouth shut and not defend myself.

Anjali was the next one to offer her opinion.

"Babes, that was super wrong of you. Rasik is really nice and unlike many others, in the office, he gives all the interns a chance to learn and prove their mettle."

"Just go apologize to him post lunch." Jessey offered her tip.

Manpreet as usual was quiet and had nothing to say.

"I didn't mean to offend him. I relayed the exact words of the librarian to him."

"Are you kidding me?" Anjali enquired. "Did he ask you to speak to him in that tone? You were downright offensive."

"I didn't mean to sound offensive. I just..." and there it went. I had no explanation to offer for my behaviour without revealing a little more.

We had reached the cafeteria. The place was teeming with people from all departments and perhaps the different channels that had their offices in the building. Despite the crowd, the girls could find us a table. I decided to opt for a thaali while the others bought dessert or sandwiches. I was too tired to make a conversation and was completely lost and oblivious to the fact that the girls were talking to someone standing at our table. It was Swati's constant nudge that brought me to the present. I looked at her with wide eyes in complete confusion. She drew my attention to the man standing atop the balcony at the cafeteria and announcing the party in the evening. The sight of him was enough to make me lose my senses again. I was numb and not capable of saying a word.

"Anjali, let's go and congratulate him on his win," Swati said.

Anjali nodded her head in agreement. "Let us all go after lunch and congratulate him. And a word for you Swati, don't ogle him. It looks really stupid and childish. Grow up!"

"Arree...why are you getting irritated. I love him. He is so handsome..."

"And so, beyond your reach," Anjali spoke as a matter of fact.

Swati pouted. "Whatever, a girl can dream."

"Yeah. You are so not in your right senses. Bini is going to kill you if you make a fool of yourself in front of him."

"Does Bini know him?" The connection was obvious, both of them were from Kolkata and could be friends, or friends of friends.

It was so obvious of Swati to open her mouth and answer me. "She knows him since her childhood days. He is her brother's classmate and friend from school."

"Oh!" I gasped. How was this information of any help I had no clue? But Bini and he were a perfect combination, a match made in heaven. We finished our lunch and as decided we walked up to him to congratulate him.

Anjali took the lead. "Hey, congratulations!"

"Thank you! And you guys are also invited to the party in the evening."

"Thank you, Swati and Anjali piped in."

Manpreet congratulated him in a whisper that I believe I was the only one to hear since I was standing next to her. Swati prod me to speak. Anjali lifted her eyes to let me know it was time for me to congratulate him too.

"Congratulations!" I spoke very disinterestedly. He gave me his hand to shake. Swati introduced him to me. "Meet the star reporter of FBN, Agam Khandelwal." Agam smiled at me giving no trace of any recognition. How can he forget me? We just met two days ago on the train. If it would have been fifteen days, I could have presumed I was just another face to him, he saw on numerous journeys and spoke to on daily basis. But after the intimate time...I cringed at my own thoughts. There was no intimacy between us.

"Thank you! And you are...?"

Swati spoke for me as usual. She is Abhilasha, intern with FMN."

An "oh" escaped his mouth. "Please do come for the party in the evening. I will be looking forward to hosting you all."

And before I could speak another word, Swati held my hand and carried me out of the cafeteria as Anjali and Manpreet assured him of our presence as well as Bini's. I could feel his eyes on my back and humour dancing on his face. On our way back Swati reminded me how I owed an apology to Rasik and I should get going as soon as I get there.

When you had well-wishers like Swati for you, you didn't need anyone else in your life. Well, I was at my sarcastic best today.

Rasik was not at his desk when we reached. There was no way I could now apologize to his empty chair. I didn't know whether it was my tough luck or Rasik's that had got us to a wrong start on the very first day. The afternoon was uneventful as predicted by Anjali. With no work to do and nothing to learn, I decided to make myself useful by reading the newspapers in front of me. There were newspapers from all around the country stacked for reporters to read. I picked my favourite 'The Telegraph' which I had been reading since I was a kid. I was too engrossed in the newspapers to notice when Rasik arrived.

When I lifted my head to see him sitting at his desk, I sprang to my feet immediately to tender my apology in the best way possible. He was on the phone while I stood before waiting for him to finish. When finally, he did he looked at me with a questioning stance.

"Rasik Sir, I am really sorry if I have offended you. I did not mean to be rude or disrespectful. I spoke the same words that the librarian asked me to say to you." Rasik heard me carefully.

"It's okay. There is no apology needed." I smiled in relief.

"But you should check your tone while you speak to your seniors. Your haughty attitude would not take you too far and might end you up in some trouble sooner or later. You should learn to keep yourself calm."

I agreed immediately and thanked him for his kind advice. Now with no bad blood between Rasik and me and I was sure to make progress at work. Maybe not on my first day, but definitely later this week.

Swati the big mouth as usual had something to add.

"Rasik Sir are you going to the party in the evening?"

Rasik turned his revolving chair to face us.

"The one Agam has thrown?"

"Yes, yes..."

"No, no you girls should go. And the party is going to be very boring. Trademark samosa and gulab jamun and I don't like to enjoy freebie food for no reason."

Rasik's stance reeked of contempt if anything but else. I could not understand what was wrong with enjoying food at a party where you had been cordially and graciously invited by the host. It felt like Rasik had no better reason to refuse his presence. He did go to the party as soon as it began but he came back without having the cheap samosas and gulab jamun as stated by him. He had only gone there to congratulate Agam and meet his editor buddy Arjun Sisodia.

Precisely at six, all the girls got up to get ready for the party. What was the big deal? I had no clue. They went to the powder room and came out looking a little caked up than they were in the morning. Finally, when they felt they looked like the perfect divas they decided it was time to make an entry at the cafeteria.

Bini was still not back from her onsite work and the girls were totally not missing her. In fact, they seemed to be more chilled out and more like themselves when she wasn't around.

There was no attempt to add bling to the cafeteria for the so-called party. Everyone seemed to be just enjoying each other's company. There was no music but the voices of hundred people talking simultaneously were bad enough for ears and our subsequent health. Swati and Anjali jostled their way around to look for a place for us to stand and enjoy our snacks. The fare was limited, nonetheless, the food was unlimited for everyone to enjoy. I believe no one turned up at these parties for the food. It was more about enjoying some time off from work and being together with your colleagues in a relaxed environment.

The star of the party Agam Khandelwal was making an effort to talk to everybody who went up to him. I know because the first thing I did after entering the cafeteria was to scan it for his presence. He had a permanent smile pasted on his face and his eyes were glinting. I was observing him like a star-struck fan, following every movement of his.

Anjali and Swati were soon by my side. Jessey was catching up with some interns at FBN and Manpreet as usual was as innocuous as possible. Anjali had got hot piping samosas and gulab jamun for all of us to gorge on. I volunteered to help her stand in the queue and get food but she politely declined. Swati and Anjali were enjoying themselves to the core while I and Manpreet sucked at the party scene. They struck up conversations easily with anyone and everyone and mingled freely. While I was still stuck to the table for a company with Manpreet who could not be said to be a companion at all.

"Manpreet, I am getting myself a cup of coffee. Do you want some?"

She shook her head. "Can I come along? I am bored and I don't see the other three making their way back anytime soon."

"Sure."

I punched the buttons to pour myself a cup of coffee. Manpreet wanted to get herself a glass of drink and moved towards the counter. She asked me to wait for her. Someone tapped me on my shoulder and I knew it was a cue to get moving from there. I moved aside to give the person behind me space to use the machine. But instead of reaching out for the buttons, the hand reached out to me on my shoulder to tear my eyes away from the counter.

"Hi!" The same familiar voice.

"Hey!" I didn't want to sound hostile, particularly to a senior who exuded power in the office.

"We meet again."

"Yeah! What a coincidence." I tried to inject as much enthusiasm into my voice as I could.

"Are you not happy to see me?" His question baffled me. I had just spent a day with him in train out of compulsion. Why should his presence make me happy or sad?

"Why should I be happy to see you?"

"To see a familiar face in your place of work... and," before he could complete, he was called over by someone.

Manpreet was back with a can of cola. We sipped our drinks in silence. I decided to make an effort to talk to her. But before I could open my mouth, we were joined by Swati, Jessey and Anjali who still didn't seem to have had enough of the party.

"This is so much fun." Jessey chirped in. "The cute guy out there, he is interning with FBN and guess what, he turned out to be a common friend of a friend."

I rolled my eyes. "That's great!" I replied sarcastically.

Jessey was on a high and did not notice my irritation with her on mentioning the cute guy. As if my words were all that was needed for her to continue ranting about him.

"He is Aditya and he is working under Agam. He told me how efficient and organized Agam is about his work. He went to Kolkata for..." and I had drifted off. When I got back to my senses Anjali was narrating something about a story where FMN and FBN may collaborate.

"I so want to be a part of this story but Aditya informed me that everything is hush, and they might not select interns and if they do, it has to be someone with a great track record."

"It won't be me!" Swati quipped pessimistically.

"Bini will take the moolah again." Anjali chimed in with the same pessimism.

I had enough of Bini and her greatness for the day. Also, the loud noise was getting on my nerves and I needed a break.

"I will be back." And I excused myself from the girls.

I went to the terrace and just as Swati had pronounced, it was dotted with smokers. I found myself a corner from the chain of rings in the air and stood quietly sipping my coffee watching people leaving their offices and hurrying to go back home.

For the first time in my life, I was feeling lonely. I stood amidst so many people and I wasn't one of them. Fun-loving, extrovert, vibrant and open like the others. I could not relate to any one of them. How was I supposed to last here? The loneliness was engulfing me, constricting around me. In that moment of extreme vulnerability, my thoughts were running haywire, my determination was wavering, my self-confidence was zero and my chance to do any good work wasn't coming anytime soon.

"Hey! What are you doing here?"

I didn't have to turn back to know who it was.

"I think I am drinking coffee."

"You think?"

"Okay. I am drinking coffee." I smiled at our silly banter.

There was nothing much to talk about. And as usual, like a bad girl, I picked up the strands of our communication to keep it going.

"So, I didn't expect you here."

"Me too."

"Definitely."

"Congratulations! I wish I had known I was sharing the seat with a famous guy."

"And would that have made you a little less haughty?"

I rolled my eyes at him for labelling me. "Okay, that's rude and that's a first from you. Is it because you are a senior?"

"What! No!" He answered me rather disbelievingly.

"Chill, I am simply kidding," and I stuck out my tongue to make a funny face.

"How was your first day?"

"Pretty shitty."

"Is it?" and he continued with no need for me to egg him to speak. "It was a very fine day for me, perhaps one of the best in many years."

"I know." I looked at him with understanding.

We stood there for a few minutes in silence. The crowd around us was thinning as people headed back home reeling in from the after-effects of the party.

"Hello, hello and you are here dude."

Both of us turned to see Bini reaching out to Agam.

"Congratulations Agam!" She hugged him and I could see the speck of familiarity and warmth between the two.

"So, you two know each other." She enquired as she found us standing together. Before Agam could reveal anything, I gave her a tacit answer with my head. I was of no importance to Bini and I was intruding into their space suddenly by standing there. I decided to move and give them the much-needed space to talk. I walked afar and yet I had my ears glued to their conversation. They chatted for a long time. The friendliness between the two was evident through their body language.

"You better give me a good party. This isn't done."

Agam raised his eyes in question to know what she was looking for.

"How about dinner at Bistro followed by drinks?"

"Sounds like an idea! Maybe this weekend?"

"Perfect! I will ask dadu to join us."

"Killer. Let's do it."

They made their way out and Agam was totally into her to wave me goodbye.

I finished my coffee and went back to my workstation. It was 7 in the evening and people were winding up to leave. With no breakthrough news to be broken from the city, people were relaxed and working on the features for the weekend. Since Bini had a good long productive day at work, she was asked to leave and report tomorrow again at eleven-thirty in the morning. The rest of us sat to while away our time in our lounge, hoping for the shift to end soon.