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(A.N POV Switch to Carter. He will sound a lot more 'mature' for his age only because he is a Lycan so you as the reader can understand what happening)

Crispin's POV

Day One

Pacing around this house the only memories that fill my mind are of Dieter. Our first kiss, our first touch, our first time. His presence changed the feel of the house in a way I didn't recognize until now. Until he was gone.

It's only been a day but it felt like my world was closing in.

I tried my best to be present for Carter, and I fought tooth and nail against every instinct that told me to get to my mate. I wanted to. So badly. But I couldn't leave my pack. I couldn't. Not yet.

Though it was nice to know Dieter felt the same way. My phone stayed dinging from a text from him. Both of us and our wolves feel the distance. I don't know when the next time we'd see each other. We purposefully ignored those questions because it made it too real. Now I wish we would have been grown-ups about it and said something.

Day Three

Everything hurts. My body, my heart, my will to live. Dieter and I stay on the phone at all times, we've been on a continuous call since the second day he left. We only hang up when our phones are overheating and having a broken phone would be worse than two hours of not talking to each other. But even then, it's not working.

There needs to be more. I need to be with him. His scent is fading and is not as strong as it was in the house anymore. My bed is cold and empty and I find myself at the brink of tears at every waking moment.

It gets harder to resist the urge to leave everything and go to him. I just want him. I just want to see him. I need him.

Day Seven

I can't breathe without him.

I can't eat without him.

I can't live without him.

The mark on my neck that usually causes me pleasure is burning with need. It's causing my body to shut down.

I need to go to him...I need... I don't know.

The only thing that kept me moving was the fact I had a son to take care of. Though I think he can sense something is wrong with me. I find him standing and staring when I hand him his food. When he speaks I try to respond, but it's not up to par so he throws a fit. But when that happens I just walk away leaving him on his own. I can't handle him right now. Not on my own. Not anymore.

Day Nine

My phone broke.

And that was my last straw. I couldn't take it anymore. I never knew what depression was, even after my parents passed away. But now I do.

I found myself regretting many of my life choices, regretting not being smarter and not leaving to be with my mate. I should have left and been with him. But now I am stuck in bed. Pitiful. Unmoving, and unwilling to live life he is not here with me.

I ordered a new phone but it will take another day before it gets here, which means I have to go two days without speaking to my mate.

That broke me.

I was planted firmly in the bed, covered with a blanket from head to toe. Unwilling to move until I got my new phone. Until I got my Dieter back.

I needed him more than I needed to breathe.

And I should have known better.

This distance would never work, mated or not. Though I am sure it would be a lot easier if we weren't. I do not regret what we did. No, I am happy that we did. But now that happiness is being overshadowed by the pain of my mate being near.

I wondered if Dieter was handling this well, or was all on my own. Was he as heartbroken as me? Was he fighting off depression and loneliness as much as I was right now?

The only thing that brought me comfort was sleep, and I knew if I slept the day would go faster and hopefully the time I woke my phone would be delivered.

*****

Carter's POV

'Daddy's crying again.' I told Tatty as we sat on the couch.

We've been sitting here all day. Daddy came down to make us cereal but then went back to his room without us. I tried to say 'Morning Daddy' but he didn't respond.

Daddy also doesn't have a phone, and on the phone, Deder is there. But no phone means no Deder. Deder is so nice to us. He likes us. He made sure to have Daddy take care of us. But no Deder means no Daddy.

'I'm hungry, Tatty.'

Daddy told us to stay on the couch and don't move until he comes back. But that was a long time ago. When the sun was up, but now the sun is gone! And my belly hurts bad and I have to go potty. But I can't potty without Daddy's help. But no Deder, no Daddy.

'We should check on daddy.' Tatty said.

'No! Daddy said to stay!' Though I wanted to make sure he was okay. Daddy doesn't stay up there for long. This was different than other times.

'What if he is hurt? And you have to get someone?'

Tatty was right, but I was scared. Daddy yells at Carter a lot now. Even when I want to stay with him, he yells. It makes me feel very bad and sad. Daddy doesn't like Carter. Deder likes Carter. But there is no Deder. So no Daddy.

'I will keep you safe!' Tatty said as he puffed his chest out. He walked around and I smiled. Tatty would always keep me safe. He said that all the time.

'Okay, Tatty!'

I jumped from the couch and it took a long to go upstairs. The steps are so big, but once I was done I made sure to tiptoe and be very quiet.

Daddy's door was open a little bit, so I pushed it open even more. It was very dark in the room and it was kind of scary. Daddy's back was facing towards me and I could hear him whimpering, and it hurt my heart. I wanted to make Daddy feel better.

"Daddy?" I squeaked out.

"Go away, Carter." Daddy's words were mean, but I didn't leave. No, Tatty told me to stay.

"But, daddy--"

"Carter, go back on the couch."

"Are you okay?" I asked, which finally made Daddy turn around. I was happy to see Daddy's face finally. But he didn't seem happy to see me. He looked very mad. His face was all red, his eyes were glowing. He was really mad...

"I SAID LEAVE! GET OUT!"

Mean voice....he used the mean voice again.

I felt my tears on my face and I wiped it away quickly. Daddy doesn't like it when I cry. I took a step back and ran away from the room, and back downstairs.

I HATE Daddy's mean voice! But he always does it! And it hurts my heart. My heart starts to hurt every time he does it. And I cry but Daddy tells me to stop crying and he uses a mean voice again!

'I'm sorry, Carter. I didn't know he would use a mean voice.' Tatty whined to me as I sniffled.

My stomach growled again and it was hurting. I looked down at my pants and I saw they were wet in the front. Uh oh.

'Tatty, I had an accident.'

I was supposed to tell Daddy when I go on myself, but Daddy doesn't like Carter anymore. So I don't know what to do now. I'm hungry and I'm wet and it's dark. And now I'm very sad. Daddy doesn't like Carter. Daddy only likes Deder. But Deder likes Carter.

'Let's go find Deder!' I yelled at Tatty.

I went to where my shoes were and I slid them on. Tatty helped me to make sure they were on the right foot. Tatty also said it was cold outside so I put on a jacket. I unlocked the door and pulled it open. It was dark but the lights were on outside so I could still see.

'Hmm...which way should I go?' I asked Tatty as I walked further out of the house. I left the door open just in case I couldn't get back in.

'Go...that way!'

Even though Tatty wasn't here, I could still know what he meant...

It was really cold outside, but I was happy I had a jacket. My feet hurt but I had to find Deder for daddy, then daddy would like Carter again. My stomach made a loud noise again and this time it hurt really bad.

'Owie! My belly hurts tatty!'

'We have to find Deder! If we find Deder he will feed us!'

Tatty was right. Deder took care of me. And he took care of Daddy.

I stayed on the sidewalk. The street was scary because there were a lot of cars and I could get hit if I walked out there. That's what Rewa says.

I felt my face get wet again, I was crying again and I was really sad. I can't find Deder, and my belly hurt, and my feet. And I don't know how to get home! It's too dark to see where I am. But Daddy did tell me to go away. Maybe Daddy wanted me to get lost.

I sat down on the grass and I started to cry. Tatty tried to tell me to keep going but my feet hurt a lot. And I was all alone.

One of the cars went passed but then stopped a few seconds later. I thought that maybe it was Deder and I stood up to look but it wasn't.

"Carter? Oh, my goddess! Carter!" I saw Rewa running toward me, and she looked scared and sad. I started crying even more as she got closer.

"Carter? Are you okay?" She picked me up in her arms, even though I was wet, and held me close to her chest. I cried as I wrapped my arms around her neck and held off tight.

I felt her head whip around like she was looking for something. But whatever it was she didn't find it. She walked to the car and opened the back door and she buckled me in my car seat. My stomach made a loud noise again and I kept crying.

"Oh, Carter." She said softly as she looked over my wet and dirty clothes. "Did you eat today?" She asked me and I shook my head no. I saw her eyes and she looked angry. Was she angry at me?

"I'm sorry Rewa! Don't be mad at me!" I screamed out, I don't want her to use a mean voice on me either.

"W--what? No, Carter, I'm not mad at you! I promise. Okay? I'm going to take you home--"

"No! Daddy doesn't like Carter! He told Carter to leave!" More tears fell out of my eyes. I needed to find Deder.

"Okay, okay. You'll come with me okay? I'll take you to my house. Is that okay?"

I nodded slowly and she let out a deep breath and backed away. I watched as she got in the car and started driving.

"Babe? What's going on?" A random girl's voice asked. It was coming from a phone in Rewa's hand.

"I--I just found Carter outside, all alone in a random field. He is 25 minutes away from his house." She gritted out.

I felt my eyes get heavy and I was really, really sleepy.

"I need you to get Dieter, somethings not right."

Deder? I FOUND DEDER!

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Guys...I am so sorry to traumatize you all like this. Things were so GOOD, weren't they? Well, it was good while it lasted. Now we are getting to the nitty-gritty of the story.

But poor baby Carter, so happy Rena found him...