Chapter 41

“Do I have your attention now?”

My hands balled into fists as I searched for the right words to use. The officers had asked me to play along with him and act nice so I heeded. “You have my attention.”

“Good. It’s you I want and if you don’t come to me, more people will get hurt.”

I shut my eyes, drawing in breath and exhaling to steady my rage. “Where is my sister?” I asked as calmly as I could.

He let out the cackle I had grown to loathe so much. “I can see that my plan worked. You must be terrified, aren’t you?”

The officer’s wave urged me to say something so the conversation could stretch to the sixty seconds they needed to track him. “Yes, I am very scared.”

“If you follow my instructions, you may save your poor sister’s life,” he said before the line went off.

The officers sighed. “This guy is smart. It’s exactly fifty-nine seconds.”

Before anyone could say anything else, my phone rang again. “Where is my sister?”

“She’s not dead if that’s what you’re asking. I just wanted to show you that I’m not playing games. You want to see proof of life? You can come see for yourself.”

I let out a heavy sigh of relief, the tensed faces staring at me doing the same. I wanted to believe him but I needed proof. “I want to speak with her now,” I demanded.

“I make the demands not you. Tell your father to open the borders and then maybe we can negotiate on the swap.”

“Swap? What do you mean?” I knew what he meant but I didn’t like the sound of it.

“You for her. I’m giving you an hour, if the cops don’t disappear within an hour, I’m sending you her body and then I’ll come get all of you one by one. You will be the last, of course.” The line went dead again and we waited for his next call but it never came.

Giving in to his demands was hard because there was no guarantee he would keep his word of not harming her but we had to do it. I could barely sit still as we waited for the inevitable.

“I can’t believe we’re doing this again,” Lionel mumbled. My head lay on his shoulders and his arm encircled my waist. Our bodies heated each other in the cold and uneasy moment. I couldn’t see myself doing anything else than be in his arms at the final moments I was probably going to spend with him.

I was dumb not to have given him a chance after all those months of waiting and taking care of me like no one else had. He understood my fears, gave me assurance whenever I was low and showered me with love I didn’t even deserve. He deserved better. A woman without insecurities and hazardous baggage.

“I love you,” he whispered. It was the second time he’d said it out loud and it felt as sweet as it did the first time if not more. A tear slid down my cheek. We were never going to have the happy ever after he’d always fantasized about.

“I love you, Lionel. I really do.” I finally voiced it out. I had kept it hidden for too long, it was time I let it out. He shot into a straight seating position, my head slipping off his shoulders. “What did you say?”

I looked deep into his grey orbs. “I said I love you. I mean it.”

He leaned back, placing my head back on his shoulders. “You don’t mean it. You’re just emotional, stressed, and tired.”

I rose from the seat, taking a hold of his hand so he could do the same. We excused ourselves, exiting the living room and circling the house to the guest house. Once he shut the door behind him, I pushed him against the wall, taking him by surprise when my lips claimed his in a passionate kiss.

His arms went around my waist, pulling me closer to him so there was no space between us. His erection bulged through his jeans, grazing my thigh and sending tingles all over my body. My hands quickly found the bottom of his sweatshirt in an attempt to lift it so I could take it off but he stopped me.

Suddenly cutting short the kiss, he loosened his arms and shoved them in his pockets. My heart ached at the loss of his touch, the sensation of his lips on mine, and how good it made me feel.

“We can’t do this, Shannon,” he managed to say after seconds of struggling to voice out his thoughts.

“Why?” my question came out more like desperation. I was indeed desperate to savor as much time as I could with him.

“You don’t know what you’re doing. You’re only acting on impulse.” He combed his fingers through his hair. “This isn’t how I would want us to do things. You’re not ready.”

I slumped into the couch, my face connecting with my hands. I was supposed to feel ashamed for getting turned down but I didn’t. I felt free around him; like I could do anything and he wouldn’t judge.

He came to sit beside me, his fingers running circles on my back. “I understand how you feel. I have been in an almost similar situation before,” he confessed.

My eyes quickly met his, it was the first time he’d opened up to me about anything. Maybe it had something to do with the loss I always presumed he’d undergone. “You have? What happened?” I was quick to ask.

His expression instantly changed, like he realized he had said too much. He took my hands into his and gave me a small smile. “It’s not yet time for that. Let’s first deal with the situation at hand then we can get back to this.”

Even though I knew there was no coming back for me, and we would never get to have this conversation, I still nodded. He leaned in to place a kiss on my cheek before moving to my forehead.

“You don’t deserve all that’s happening to you,” he said.

“It’s you I don’t deserve.”

His jaw ticked, his disapproval for my claims evident in his features. “Don’t you ever say that because it’s not true. It hurts me to know this is how you feel. Why would you say that?”

I palmed his face, my fingers roaming all over it. His lips were soft and I wanted to taste them again but he returned my focus to the question at hand.

“I’m too much trouble, Lionel. You shouldn’t be living the kind of life where you keep worrying about the safety of your woman. You shouldn’t have to risk your life to protect me. You should be happy, going on dates and doing things normal couples do,” my voice broke with every word I uttered.

He lifted my chin so our eyes could meet. A smile adorned his lips as he said, “Then I will save you once more, but this time, I will set you free completely. So that we can do what normal couples do. I promise you this.”