Chapter 42

Lionel’s lips devouring mine in the last kiss we shared welded itself to my mind as I absentmindedly approached the train in a robotic style. My destination was still unknown because I was following Matthew’s directions.

My surroundings were a blur but I could feel the train speed away, sending me to the miserable life I was bound to end up in. It’s like fate had made its decision because no matter what I did, there was no out for me. I certainly couldn’t pull the trigger of the gun tucked in my back. I didn’t have it in me to kill anything that had life, more so a human being.

I doubted I could even aim right. The two hours shooting practice session gave me the notion that it was easy to aim and hit your target. They were right but there was a huge difference between a dummy and a deranged man.

When the train came to a halt, I slackly got off, occupying the seat he’d asked me to. I was jolted to my senses when a man dropped an envelope on my lap before walking away. I wasn’t sure if the undercover agents with me saw it but I followed their instructions nonetheless. I wasn’t supposed to steal a glance at them for fear of giving them out to Matthew’s men who were likely to be watching me as well. The letter inside it directed me to the next stop.

After three train rides and two cabs, I finally came face to face with Matthew Morgan. He chose a quiet and empty parking lot a few blocks from the jam-packed roads. He hadn’t aged a day from when I last saw him and the sight of his devious smile sickened me.

“Where’s my sister?” I asked before he could voice out his enthusiasm to see me.

He beckoned at his friend who disappeared to reappear with a frightened Ashlie. A sigh of relief escaped me; not a single hair on her head was out of place. She scurried towards me, tears of joy cascading down our faces as we embraced each other. But it was short-lived when Matthew grumbled that we were sapping his time.

With the supervision of Matthew and his men, I walked Ashlie down the busy street, waving down a taxi and urging her to go home amidst protests. Her safety is what mattered most at the moment.

I could only hope the agents still had a visual of me as I hopped into Matthew’s car. “You’re sick if you think I’ll agree to be with a psychopath like you,” I said through gritted teeth.

A resounding slap stung my cheek, the venom in his eyes impelling me to scoot further away from him than I already was. “Shut the fuck up!”

The slap was enough to keep my mouth sealed for the remainder of the ride. Someone had better save me because there was no way my sanity would stay in check while with him. If the trackers didn’t work, I was doomed.

Once at the hideout, he locked me in a room and disappeared. I was antsy, pacing the tiny room and holding on to the hope that things would soon be alright. Hours went by, but there was still no sign of anyone coming to my aid. Matthew only unlocked the door to give me food before leaving again. This was pure torture, giving me the urge to interrogate him because I needed to understand why he was holding me hostage.

When next he came to check up on me, I took the opportunity to question him. I needed to uncover as much information as I could before he could get hauled to jail. “Who’s working for you in the FBI?”

He plopped on the only chair in the room, his posture giving off the vibe that he was in control. “Let’s just say I have my ways of getting things done. There’s always a dirty cop or two willing to get their hands dirty for a handsome price.”

“So your informant gave you our witness protection details? What are their names?”

“Why would I tell you? We should be discussing our future not this.” I scoffed at his reply. He wasn’t about to let up easily and I was beginning to get irritated.

My mind wandered to what I had done in the past to warrant such bad luck but I came out empty. I always lived by the book, made the right choices, and worked hard but for what?

“What do you want from me?” I was compelled to ask. I had nothing to offer, but he still clung to me, risking his freedom and everything his family owned.

“If you have ever fallen in love before, you wouldn’t be asking me that,” he remarked.

I always thought gangsters never fell in love because it was against their rules but I was clearly wrong. I now understood why love was a taboo in their world; it was a brisk way to destruction.

“How can you force me to stay when you know I don’t love you?”

He wasn’t fazed by my revelation, going silent and leaving me to believe he wasn’t going to answer until he said, “You love me. It’s just that you have forgotten. You will love me again.”

I palmed my face, he sure had a fucked up way of thinking. All I felt towards him was distaste. “I don’t love you. I never have and never will. Just let me go and the feds will be off your back. You shouldn’t give up everything you have for someone who doesn’t even love you.”

He shot up, his chest heaving up and down as he strode towards me. My back connected with the wall in an attempt to escape him. There was no telling what he could do so I got ready to strike.

“What do you want me to do for you to love me back? Tell me, I will do it. If you want me to stop everything I’m doing to start afresh, I will do it.” His words came out strained and for a second, I was empathetic of his situation.

“Just let me go, Matthew. We can’t be together even if you leave the gang.”

His pale skin immediately turned red, his nose flaring with the fury burning inside him. Grabbing me by the collar, he shoved me to the floor and marched out of the room. “If I can’t have you, nobody will,” he yelled before shutting the door and locking it.

A soft, woman-like voice echoed to where I was seated and I rushed to the door, pressing my ear on it to confirm if I heard right.

“You’re not listening, she has made up her mind. Knowing her, there’s no changing it,” Matthew’s said in distraught.

“You’re not trying hard enough. Do I have to teach you how to court her even after giving her to you on a silver platter?” The woman’s question was followed by silence. Matthew’s ego would never let him answer that. “All you have to do is treat her right and in a few months, she will forget you ever wronged her, trust me.”