38

Eloise

A week went by, a week in which I didn't know what it was like to smile, or feel any good feeling, every day I had nightmares with the image of Julian leaving me and when it wasn't that it was my grandmother saying goodbye, II couldn't take so much sadness anymore. I couldn't eat anymore and had already lost three kilos. My nights at the hospital were constant, sometimes João or Olivia made me go to their house to sleep while one of them stayed in the hospital. They were also suffering for her because they also considered her as a grandmother.

My grandmother was the same way, every day she lost more weight and the doctors couldn't tell me if she would be cured, the cancer was discovered very late and the day I, in tears and despair, demanded an explanation they said that not even a withdrawal of the breast would solve, that I would have to enjoy every second with her, and that's what I was doing. He read to her every night, sang to her, did her hair, and showed her stuff about marriage on his cell phone.

I still hadn't received any news from Julian, I just knew that someone was following me, but that was his friend, Agnelo who told me that it was in case someone showed up wanting revenge on Julian. He also told me that I couldn't visit him in prison and that he was doing his best to free my love.

I was so sad that I didn't care about anything but my grandmother and the thought of my fiancé in that prison, he didn't deserve any of that.

The night in which my life took a complete turn began when João and his sister forced me to go out to eat and also go to the movies, while Mr. Mollina stayed at the hospital with my grandmother.

"Please my northern strawberry. It's so bad to see you like this." João said and I smiled with the new nickname.

"It's impossible to be happy in my situation." I said with burning eyes.

"But as your best friends, we'll do anything to make you happy." Olivia decreed.

"You guys are the best... I'm sorry for being such a pain in the ass these last few days." I admitted.

"What?! Don't ever say that again! Look at everything you're going through, I in your skin would have already committed suicide, imagine being asked to marry you one day and the next having your fiancé arrested. No no, you're wonderful and strong!" My friend exclaimed giving me a strong hug.

"It's cool Liv. You don't need to talk like that, be more sensitive with our doll." João said in a joking tone and hugged me too. "By the way, we're all grieving for Grandma." Completed.

"João, when you have a daughter, if you spoil her like you spoil Eloíse, she'll be disgusting!" Liv teased and I couldn't help but smile.

Then we went to the cinema and watched a movie, I didn't really pay attention, on the contrary, I ended up taking a nap in the soft upholstered chair in the huge cinema room. When it was over, my friends woke me up and complained about how they were talking to themselves while they thought they were talking to me, it was funny I confess, watching them pretend to be angry to make me smile.

We stopped at the food court and each of us ordered a complete x-everything, except mine that I ordered without pickles. It took a while but it arrived, I was starving, but I felt something very strange, like other times I tried to eat, a strong wave of nausea rose through my throat, I tried to hold it, stop and concentrate until I reached a bathroom .

"I need to go to the bathroom, quick, quick. Liv help me, where is the bathroom?" I asked when the urge was too strong.

The two looked at me scared, but Olivia, who lived in the mall and knew the place like no one else, pulled me over and quickly found the bathroom, I went in and it was like an impulse, everything I had tried to eat came out at once, I suddenly felt weak and dizzy, my mouth went dry, and I blacked out. My fainting must have been quick because when I opened my eyes Olivia desperately tried to wake me up.

"Oh God! Friend, friend... Eloíse, you're not playing with me! Please wake up!" I opened my eyes and saw her pale with her arms around my head.

"Calm down..." I stammered.

"Oh thank God." He exclaimed and hugged me.

When I composed myself, I washed my mouth and splashed some water on my face, walked with Olivia clinging to my arm to the water fountain where I drank water until my stomach was full. Then she held both my arms so that I was facing her, looked deep into my eyes and let go of what I even imagined.

"How long have you been feeling this?" He asked and at that moment my head started to work properly, and only then did I start to have an idea of what was really going on.

"Since Grandma got sick. I mean, since she told me." I spoke and our eyes started to get amazed.

"And the times you and Julian had sex, which I'm guessing was a lot." She has no idea how much. "Did you guys wear protection?" My heart was racing I could hear the pounding, my palms started to sweat and my mouth felt dry. Reality was so easy to see, but it often blinded us.

"None…" Her eyes widened.

"None? Since the first time? My God Eloíse! How stupid you are!" She exclaimed and I started crying as reality hit me in the face.

Stupid! I really was really stupid, Julian and I had sex many, many times and none of them used a condom or I took some kind of medicine, where was I thinking that with all this I could get pregnant? I was so delighted and in love that I didn't stop to analyze the truth, the consequences of my thoughtless actions, the truth was much harder than we wanted to accept. Everything pointed to a possible pregnancy of mine.

"We're going to the nearest pharmacy right now and you're going to have a test. Come on." She pulled my hand and we went to meet João, who at that moment was using his cell phone.

"Wow! I thought they walked away and left me!" Complained.

"John, where's my lunch?" Olivia asked with a killer look.

"I ate, you took your time, I thought you wouldn't want to have an iced snack." He shrugged.

"Oh but you son of a bitch..." When she would finish the sentence the same did for her.

"Bitch. I really am, our mother is a cow!" He spoke making it clear how that did not affect him and showed his tongue. "My God, what did that bitch do to you? Why are your eyes red? Were you crying?" He asked getting up and looking at me.

When someone is crying, don't ask why, it breaks down the person's structures and they start to cry compulsively.

"I'm so stupid!" I said between sobs.

"Why?!" Impatient he asked.

"I think I'm pregnant." I spoke softly and my friend got a furious face.

"You're kidding, right?" he exclaimed.

"No. It's not, everything points to it, your pretty little doll didn't protect herself any of the times she made love." Olivia smirked. I wanted to punch her in the face, but I decided it wasn't worth it.

"Eloíse, Eloíse... And now my daughter? Your fiancé is in prison, your grandmother is sick, you're definitely pregnant now. Heavenly girl, how lucky!" He said it in a joking tone, but I realized it was to break the tension.

"Let's go straight to the pharmacy for a test, then we'll all go tell Grandma Florence together and you'll find a way to tell Julian." Olivia said.

"Can you let the main story decide her own life?" John scolded his sister. She paused for a moment, perhaps thinking about her strange attitude.

"Sorry friend... I'm exaggerating a little, but you're so young, you're about to finish high school, you have so many dreams to fulfill, maybe an unexpected baby will mess it all up. I swear I 'm thinking about you." confessed.

"In the same way that I came to see that a marriage wouldn't hinder me, a baby won't either. I can accomplish anything I want, with a baby or without, married or single, that depends on each one. I 'm not terrified at the idea, I'm surprised, even though I was dumb enough not to protect myself, it would certainly happen. And by the way, he's my and Julian's son, the love of my whole life, the man I love with all my heart. my being. Now I have to bear the consequences of my actions." I spoke and my friends gaped at my quick compliance.

"Make your words my words." John said. I knew he would always have my back, he was the best friend anyone could ever have, I was so grateful to have him in my life.

At that moment the three of us hugged and cried together. And they told me that they would be with me at all times, good or bad. Then we went to the pharmacy in the mall and bought three tests.

I went into the bathroom and they were waiting for me outside, so I did the three, I waited until the moment of the result, I didn't want to look alone, so I took the three and took them outside where my friends were , we were each with a test in hand, count to three and say what you were saying.

One two three...

"It came back positive." The three of us spoke together.