Chapter 24 All of a Sudden

Elaine tightly shut her eyes when she heard Tan trying to unlock the door to her room. She gripped her chest and bit her lower lip, waiting for the pain in her chest to subside.

Eventually, her breathing returned to normal. Tearful and sweaty she released the tight hold of her chest.

However, she has no plans of coming out. She won’t let him see her like that. She doesn’t need his pity, but his forgiveness and acceptance. She felt her tear-stained face.

Guilt.

It had been eating her up for the past three years.

No matter how difficult, she deserves to bear it by herself. Until she is able to forgive herself.

Outside the room, Tan raised his clenched knuckle to knock on the door. The door was locked. He was holding the house key Marco gave him a while ago.

Why did he go back? To return the key to Elaine? He’d be lying if he’d say that’s the reason. He foolishly wanted to check on her. She drank a lot and could be hungover with a throbbing headache. She couldn’t even remember what happened last night.

Elaine knows how to drink long before they met. Even with such a tiny body, she has a high tolerance for alcohol. He shouldn’t care, but he threw the cans and bottles of beer that he saw in the room two blocks away from the house.

He was already out on the main road a while back, but he just wasn’t at ease. The next thing he knew, he is parking the car in front of the house.

Why? Aside from worrying about Elaine being hungover, her sad face kind of got stuck in his head from last night and a while ago.

Tan saw how hurt she got because of what he said. Did he want to take it back? And make sure that he was leaving her okay and not upset?

Another why.

Why did he want to soothe her feelings despite the hurt she has caused? He must be out of his mind right now. He had been doing a good job ignoring her for the past few weeks. He was able to endure being mean and speaking harshly to her- even though when he turned his back, he is the one with the heavy heart.

His heart is a traitor and wouldn’t be stopped. He was starting to feel anxious, concerned, and worried. That sad and mournful look in her eyes was killing him. That look never left her eyes from the time they saw each other again.

The question was, why did he really quit? Was it really because he didn’t have the time? Or did he consider her when he decided to resign?

Tan heaved a deep sigh. Dragging his heavy feet, he turned away. He put the key on the shelf and walked out of the house. He gave the house one more glance before getting in his car and starting the ignition.

Elaine was seventeen when he first met her. Cold-blooded, short-tempered, and always looking out for trouble- those were his first impression of her. Until she met him again four years later. She was twenty-one and is working in a restaurant. It only took Tan two hours to realize that she wasn’t as shallow as his first impression of her.

Elaine didn’t have friends aside from Drew and Macon. She hated people who abuse the weak. She was a bit uptight, but she was warm-hearted. She speaks profoundly that you’d think she’s been through a lot in life even at a young age.

Elaine didn’t know who her biological father was. The girl only spoke of her family once before. According to her, she didn’t grow up with a father. The man didn’t show up upon knowing of her mother’s pregnancy. A few years later, her mother passed away because of illness.

She was seventeen when she jokingly told him to stay single for she will marry him in the future. Like crazy, he did what he was told.

But when they got married, all nice regard and the good Tan believed in Elaine vanished. But he wanted to blame himself then. She didn’t have a family. She didn’t ask for anything from him then - just his time, attention and love. And he thought he fails to give it to her.

Then he heard every single truth came out from her mouth.

Tan believed he was more guarded now. He put those high walls up and constantly reminded himself not to let anyone in again.

Not even Janine.

Until all of a sudden, Elaine came back.

Believing he wouldn’t be shaken by anything his ex-wife would do or say, he agreed to her offer. Not just for Textile, but also to hurt her. To make her feel that she doesn’t affect him anymore after everything she did. Now, he is slowly realizing that his decision to accept her help was a mistake.

Elaine started to gradually break down his defences, and he was scared. He wasn’t prepared to get hurt again.

Tan didn’t go home. Elaine stayed up all night waiting for him. Even at two in the morning, he wasn’t home yet. When she woke up the next day, Tan was still nowhere to be found.

The camping slash birthday party of Danielle at Mt. Pulag is happening on Saturday already. She wanted to inform Tan she is attending whether he comes or not. But of course, she would’ve wanted him to accompany her.

She would try to be close again to his husband’s family. She easily got along with Danielle before. When she talked to her over the phone a few days ago, she was still friendly.

Elaine got off the car after parking in the empty space inside the memorial park. She walked her way to the private mausoleum carrying with her a bouquet of flowers.

She removed the sunglasses she had on upon entering the spacious and customized mausoleum. She laid the flowers on the grave and breathed heavily.

“Sorry, it took a long time for me to return,” she said. She tried to stop the tears from flowing so she smiled even more. “Happy Birthday. ‘Mom please pray for me in heaven. Life here on earth is hard for me.”

Tan’s meeting with some of Textile’s branch managers was just over when he received a call from Gilda. Janine’s mom, Mrs. Corazon Crisostomo is in his office.

The old lady immediately stood up from where she was seated when he arrived. She threw some pictures on his desk long before he could sit.

“What-“

“Those are additional proof that your wife has been fooling you for a long time now.”

Tan’s brows furrowed. He picked up the photos.

“Orphaned by her mom at a young age? Huh! There’s the truth. It’s just been three years since she lost her mother!”

Tan clenched his jaw while staring at the photographs. Those were stolen shots of Elaine while standing in front of the grave of someone named Bettina Martinez. The year of passing indicated was 2017. Different from what Elaine claimed that she was young when her mother died from a severe sickness.

Pain tightened in his chest. Why would Elaine even lie about such a thing to him?

“I’m very disappointed in you, Tan. You don’t know how affected Janine has been

because of that woman. Had I known that Textile is more important to you than my daughter, I would’ve taken her away from you then!”

The office door opened. Gilda peeked first, then he saw Elaine right behind her.

His wife was taken aback upon laying eyes on Mrs. Crisostomo. He noticed how she took a step backward when she approached her.

“Good you arrived. Start making up excuses. You’re good at that,” Mrs. Crisostomo said, sarcastically. Loud enough to be heard by him and Elaine. Elaine swallowed hard when she passed her by.

Elaine hastily stepped inside Tan’s office. It was Gilda who pulled the door to close it and left.

Elaine was feeling nervous. Her husband was standing beside his desk just staring at her with that disappointed look on his handsome face. Her attention came to what he was holding in his hand. Her heart was beating fast when it dawned on her what they were.

“I-I can explain…”

Tan sighed. His smile was faint. He dropped the pictures on the desk before he sat on the swivel chair. He looked down. His eyes were focused on the papers in front of him.

“Tan…”

“There were those times when I would have held a strong interest in every word you are going to say, Elaine. But that time ended the very moment you admit you’ve been lying to my face.”

Elaine didn’t want to go camping for Danielle’s birthday party anymore. She was worried she might just ruin the mood. But she was persuaded by the celebrant. Before one o clock in the morning, she found herself riding in Danielle’s four–wheel drive pick up going to Benguet.

Tan wouldn’t be able to make it. According to Gilda, he has a very important meeting on Monday. Tan wasn’t home yet when she left with her bag of packed belongings.

There were many things running through her head during the trip to their destination. Elaine had a strong inkling that it was Mrs. Crisostomo who brought the pictures to Tan. Did she intentionally follow her or it was just a coincidence? She swore she wouldn’t be happy, did the woman stood by what she said?

It was already nine in the morning when they arrived in Benguet. They all went down the vehicle at Badabak Rangers Station for a short briefing.

Elaine was welcomed by the cold wind. She is trying to assess in her mind if the sweater jacket that she brought would suffice for the cold night that awaits when Danielle held on her arm.

“The one who said ‘I couldn’t come’ was even the first one to arrive in the meeting place.”

“Huh?” She didn’t understand what Danielle meant to say.

Danielle had that playful smile on her lips. “Look.”

Elaine followed where she was pointing at with her lips. Her heart pounded in her chest when she recognized the man who seemed annoyed waiting and standing at the other side of the road.

TAN.

He was wearing a quilted puffer hooded jacket, trekking shoes, and his hands were inside the pockets of his outdoor tactical pants.

As if he felt a pair of eyes were staring at him, he raised his head to look. Elaine’s heartbeat accelerated when they caught sight of each other.

“I told him you’re sad and you look depressed. I said I’ll pimp you out to the most good-looking guy we’ll see in the campsite if he isn’t coming along with us.”

Elaine didn’t respond. She knew she wasn’t the reason Tan decided to join the camping trip. But he was here now and she was glad to be on an adventure with him again just like the old times.

“I wonder if his car has wings. He got here fast, huh?”

Elaine was restless in her seat inside the briefing room. She eyed Tan who was seated at the other end of the room. He seemed unbothered about the fact that she lied about her mother. She is now in doubt whether the disappointment, sadness, and betrayal that she saw in his eyes a while ago were indeed true.

She wanted to tell him the truth. But what if he himself would be the one to decide not to end their six-month-long contractual marriage once he finds out the reason why she did it? She is afraid that if Tan knew everything this early, he wouldn’t be able to accept her all the more.

After the briefing, the group decided which trail to follow. According to the tour guide, there were three trails to choose from. Danielle and her group decided to take the Vizcaya trail; the most difficult trail going to the campsite. They were all experienced hikers so she expected that already.

“This isn’t your first climb, right, Elaine? Come with us. This trail has more thrill than the Ambangeg Akiki one. Besides, Tan is there to assist you.”

Elaine threw a glimpse at Tan. He would probably join Danielle’s group and take the Vizcaya trail. She immediately looked away when she saw him staring at her as well.

Her first and last climb was four years ago. Before Tan and she got married. He was the one with her on the hike to Mt. Pundaquit in Zambales together with his cousins-Danielle and Gian.

It would be difficult for Elaine if she’d choose the Vizcaya Trail. Should she just ask a guide to accompany her and go separately from the group?

Tan cleared his throat.

“We’ll take the Ambangeg. Let’s just meet at the campsite in the afternoon.”

Elaine was stunned. She moved her gaze towards Tan who approached the tour guide. Danielle winked at her happily. The hikers started to prepare. The group was bidding their ‘see you laters’ when they were called by their assigned tour guide.

When they started trekking, Tan took the hiking bag she had on her back.

“It’s okay. I got it…” she protested.

But Tan couldn’t be stopped. He took it from her and went ahead.

The trail was indeed easy but not really for a beginner, such as herself, in mountain climbing. Had it not for Tan who’s been asking the guide to take breaks for her to rest awhile, they would’ve reached the campsite before three in the afternoon.

After a few more hours of walking and trekking, they finally arrived at the campsite. Catching her breath, Elaine sat by the grass. The sun was setting and the cold is penetrating her insides.

She heard the guide say while speaking with Tan, that it is possible for the temperature to drop to five degrees Celsius at dawn. It was early February, and they say it was natural. If they’d get lucky, they might even experience snow. But she was worried, she wasn’t prepared for that kind of cold.

Tan went up to her after helping out Danielle pitch her tent.

“Where is your tent?”

Elaine looked up at him. She opened her mouth but no words came out.

Tan wrinkled his forehead. Exasperatedly put his hands on his waist and faced her. “Don’t tell me you didn’t bring a tent?!”