Cared or Not

When Trevor had finally left I was left with these two men, Cedrick and Luther.

Cedrick was still supporting me and it just happened now. Only now he wrapped his arm around me for a different reason and not because we were having sex.

I simply glanced at his hand on my shoulder. It touched it similar to how Trevor had touched it earlier. As if he wants to protect me but I know what I'm seeing is wrong... This is not his intention... The difference between them Trevor is huge.

Cedrick clutched my shoulders but not too firmly. I looked up at his face when he spoke. "He was right. Your fever is not a joke. Have you taken medicine already? I can call doctor—"

"No need," I immediately shook my head. "I drank medicine earlier at the clinic and I'll probably just sleep. I'm dizzy..." I answered him.

He just nodded and was about to walk me towards the stairs until we reached my room but I stopped and stopped him. "Don't do this if you're going to be angry with me later..." I bowed slowly and deliberately lowered my voice so that Luther wouldn't hear that he was sitting there on the sofa. "And I'm not just acting. It's not like you always think of me," I added with sadness in my chest.

He sighed and his gaze seemed to sharpen even more. He looked away from me before speaking. His jaw tightened when he let go of me. "Then go, walk your self." His voice was mixed with annoyance.

I smiled very sparingly before leaving his eyes. I started walking away from him to head for the stairs. My arm was stretched out to hold the railings on the side, but as I walked closer, the handle on the side seemed to give way. I couldn't handle it and the floor continued to ripple.

"Goodness, Sherin!" Cedrick's voice panicked until I felt his arm on my waist and his hand on my shoulder.

I held my sensei and looked at him from my side. "Why? I'm fine..." I told him but the truth was that I was dizzy.

"Fuck." He hissed. "Okay when you can't even walk properly? You looked like a damn drunk woman." His voice was full of sarcasm. He stood me up properly even though I knew I was already standing straight. Is it true that I don't walk properly and I look like I'm drunk in their eyes? Is the poison I feel really that bad?

I felt Cedrick's warm arm supporting my shoulder. "Oh God!" I stayed when he picked me up without saying anything. I got a little dizzy because of that, so I closed my eyes tightly and dropped my eyelids. He started to walk slowly as he carried me in a bridal style.

"Nice! Brother-cousin's carrying!" Luther yelled teasingly from behind. I heard Cedrick mutter a couple of cursing words.

Cedrick fixed me in his arms before he stepped up the stairs, making sure I didn't fall. While he was lifting, I was leaning on his chest. I heard every beat of his chest. As if his heart wants to break free from its confinement here.

I closed my eyes very tightly and simply pressed my ear to his chest so that I could hear every beat of his heart. Maybe this was just because... he was tired of carrying me... Am I really this heavy and even this handsome man is having a hard time carrying me?

Despite the headache, I bit my lip in shame.

The living room has a quite far distance from my room. So we didn't reach my room right away and I stayed away from Cedrick. For a long time, his body was getting hot as if it wanted to give me the heat I needed for my fever. I can still smell his muscular perfume and maybe he just got home from his company.

I tried to open my eyes so that I could see his face, but when I did that, I just looked away because.... I caught him staring at me too. I feel my body shaking with every step he takes.

"You had your lipstick smudge off your lips. You weren't flirting with him, huh?"

Just because of that, the lightening mood I had for him quickly disappeared. I want to be angry but my dizziness and the heat in my eyes dominate.

I swallowed before answering him. "Fine. I was flirting with him. No matter what excuses I say... You won't believe it. Because you're always right? Who am I, right? A woman who has sex with a man who has a girlfriend just to get the material things she needed. I can't blame you if you think of me like that, Cedrick. It's okay. Maybe I'll just get used to it..." My heart was full of pain as I spoke, tears almost fell but I was able to hold them back.

I took a deep breath and then took in a lot of air, trying to calm myself down.

Cedrick didn't speak after that. It seems that I have already said what he intended to say so he has run out of words. Is it not? Maybe this is all I'll do for it he won't say hurtful words anymore. I will be the first to belittle him and belittle myself for my own sake. I don't know, it really hurts more when it comes from the mouth of some people.

Because when all the insults and self-deprecation come from me... Less pain because I know I'm lying. I know it's not easy to blame myself because I don't deserve everything that happens to me. The world has tested me too much.

Each person's state in this world is different. It's not my fault or ours that we grew up in hardship so we'll just end up here. It was not our fault that we lived without power so others looked down on us.

So despite the hardships I'm going through... I still believe there is a prize waiting for me at the end. There is a light waiting for me in the middle of my journey through this dark tunnel. So I said... I can handle it. I'm here, eh.

Maybe I have nothing else to do except fight, kill, fight the challenge of tomorrow.

He kicked the door of my room and when he entered he carefully laid me on the bed. Then he put his hands on his waist and sighed, observing my condition. He didn't leave and it looked like he had something more to say so I didn't sleep at first either.

"Next time, tell your school to dial my number. I'll pick you up in case of an emergency." he said while staring at my face.

I slowly looked away and looked at my feet. "I don't want to bother you." My voice is shy.

"So you like bothering other people?" Cedrick's voice was tinged with annoyance. It's as if he's telling me that I embarrassed him in front of other people because he's not the one who supports me, as if he's afraid of being called worthless.

I closed my eyes, remembering how Trevor had handled it earlier. "Trevor doesn't complain." I said.

"And I'm still the bad one now?" Disappointment was all over his voice.

I leaned over, turned my back on him and rested my head on the back of my palm. Avoiding the beginning of an argument between the two of us. I gently closed my eyes.

" want to rest first." I told him, indicating that I didn't want any sermon today. I don't want to be stressed.

He sighed again for the second time, still not intending to leave my room. "Aren't you going to change your clothes?" he asked.

I woke up and slowly fell asleep. "Ahh, yes... that's right... But can I be wooed? If it's okay with you..." I said and raised my arm to get up and lean on the headboard.

"Yeah. What is it?"

"You can get me some clothes from my closet and a wet towel... I want to get cold." I command, very respectfully.

He followed immediately so now he is no longer in front of me. I leaned my head against the headboard and dropped my felt. I heard Cedrick close my closet, maybe he's done looking for clothes for me. Then I heard her opening the comfort room, she was also starting to prepare the wet towel for me to wipe.

I waited for him to finish there until he came back. I also started to take off all my body coverings, not caring who could see my private part because he had seen it for a long time. Cedrick was by my side while I undressed. I also removed my undies because I saw that someone had taken my new change.

I glanced at the wet white towel he was holding and then met his eyes.

My hands don't have the strength to wipe myself right now so I said... "You saw and touched them already. Can you wipe me?"

I didn't see any complaint in his eyes so I already know what he will answer. "Okay," he replied and approached me. I straightened up and stretched my legs. He started to wipe my arm and I just closed my eyes from the taste of the coldness of the towel.

He followed my thigh and the corner of my womanhood. He finished quickly so he took my clothes next. "I will help you wear these." He said that I nodded in agreement.

He grabbed my panties and held and stretched it on its opposite corners using his fore fingers. I lifted my foot so that it wouldn't be difficult for him to put it on me. It was such a different feeling when you were awake and he was wearing you your panties.

I mean... yes, this is not the first time that he has made me wear my underwear. I know that because sometimes, when we finish having sex, I wake up in my undies. But today is different because I'm not sleeping. I can see how he lifts the small cloth and how his finger feels touching my thigh.

I have a fever and a headache and I'm dizzy but I can't help but knead in the middle every time I experience his hold. Earlier, when he was wiping me, I almost let out a moan. It should be normal but why did his hands feel different from mine? That it makes not only my heart beat but also my femininity.

His hands brought too much electricity, pleasure, and it awakens my libido that hides inside me.

I tried to see Cedrick's reaction as he slowly lifted my panties, his eyes would be glued to the fabric in his hand as he carefully lifted it. And I thought I was the only one breathing heavily at this time, but so was he.

His gaze followed his hand as it gradually rose. And when it reached the end, I lifted my ass so that he could wear it on me quickly but he was still stunned and stared at my femininity so I also lifted my ass for a long time.

I was freshly shaved there. There is nothing blocking anything there so he can see it very clearly. I squeezed my thigh slightly, embarrassed because he might see the sticky thing that is slowly flowing out of my womanhood.

I watched Cedrick's face and his eyes were full of desire. I still catch the violent swallowing of saliva. I opened my thighs so that he would know I was waiting for him to put my panties on me. He looked at my face and only then did his hand move again.

And after he did wear me my panties, he cupped my womanhood against the clothing. I was startled by what he did and couldn't stop the release of the moan that I had been suppressing. It's very tasty. He was right, Cedrick was right. I also enjoy what he is doing to me so I have no right to complain.

"Sorry... You're seducing me... I couldn't help but touch it," I swallowed after Cedrick's anxious voice. I fell back on the bed. Is he really this fond of me?