Chapter 17
The trip is silent and quite uncomfortable, I am not happy to have talked to mom like that, but she must understand that she will not redeem what she did if I go back to Kahin. I would never break a relationship to be the one to stay with someone. I can't be with the man who got my mother pregnant. What would people say about me?
"What's all this about?" I ask, parking the car in front of the house.
"The baby turns 2 months today. Did you think he would not celebrate it?” My mom answers. I smile when I see the house decorated as if it was a one-year party. Carla, Loan, Randon, Aunt Lourdes, and Malcolm come out to meet us.
"Where is the most precious thing to aunt?" Asks Carla. My mother comes down with my son in her arms.
"Here's the brown one," my mother smiles, giving the baby to my friend.
“Happy birthday, my dear,” Carla indulges in pampering my son.
"How was the trip?" Randon asks, hugging me.
"Great, I really needed something like that." I sigh at the thought that I have come back to reality, “let's go inside, this sun is not for meetings outside.” We all go inside, when we enter everything is decorated with beautiful, celestial balloons, banners with baby pictures and what I liked the most was the baby bottle cake, “clearly, Carla bought it, right?” My friend looks at me laughing.
"I couldn't help it,” she says and I laugh, “don't laugh. I have a problem with shaped cakes. I walk to the table to eat what is there.
"Are you okay, Camilla?" Aunt Lourdes asks, we all look at mom who looks sad despite the smile she gives us.
"Yes, I'm fine,” she looks at my aunt, “seriously, everything is fine. My daughter is here with me, I have a precious grandson and none of you have left me alone all these months,” tears run down my mother's cheeks, my heart clenches in my chest seeing my mother like that. When they abused me, even though I didn't remember anything, I got depressed and it's not nice to be like that, thanks to Kahin and those around me, I was able to get out of all that, so I understand my mother.
"Don't cry mom," I approach her and wipe my eyes before my tears falls, "this should teach you that we've never been alone. We can curse Kahin, but the reality is that if he had not entered my life we would not have met Loan and Malcolm, that support that from moment zero have been firm,” I hug him, “everything is fine, you no longer have to be sad,” my mother starts crying with more feeling and without being able to bear it, I also start crying.
“None of this is worth it if you are not close to me,” hearing that makes me close my eyes tightly, “I know you have to be free, that is the most important thing for you, but that you are far from me kills me, makes me feel that nothing was worth it, that I did everything wrong.”
Moving away from her a little, I look into her eyes and wipe her cheeks, “don't take it the wrong way mom, I think that being in Italy makes me good, it makes me happy. You always say that my happiness comes first, well look at me, I'm happy being in Italy,” I kiss her forehead, “now, let's stop crying and celebrate our marrone's birthday,” my mother smiles, she knows why I say that to my son.
The little party was great, my son had a great time, although when he was very stressed by so many kisses and pampering, he formed what he only knows how to form.
"Can we talk?" I turn to see Malcolm and I nod, I see him walk and I follow. When we were away from house, the two of us looked at each other, “what are you trying to do?" He asks, staring at me.
Without looking away, I purse my lips, “make my life and let him do his. I intend to heed what I was ordered,” I sound as cold as my voice allows.
"And does that make you happy?"
Looking down at the street, I answer, “it makes me very happy, going to Italy was the best thing I could do," I shrug my shoulders, "being there, I forget everything. Malcolm, I am happy, I feel full and my son grows up in a relaxed and not chaotic environment." I look at him, “it was just getting here and my life is fucking crazy. Kahin is getting more and more intense and since I ignore him, he just makes sure that I see him happy with another woman. Don't you understand that that just makes me feel good? That just shows me that my decision was the best.”
Malcolm, as always, smiles and nods, “you're a bad little girl, you should listen and give him a chance to talk to you.”
Now, I'm the one who laughed outrageously, “don't screw me, Malcolm. Since when do you sponsor those things for him? Are you aware that he intends to continue with the damn contract?” My chat partner nods again, totally relaxed.
"I know, but I also know that you are forcing him to do so."
Looking at him incredulously, I frown, “don't joke with me, Malcolm! He has a wife and he’s expecting a child. Who do you take me for? It would never be the other, I love and respect myself a lot to give in to something like that. Tell that idiot to respect himself, to respect his wife and son, and for the most sacred thing to respect me as a woman with self-love that I am,” pissed off, I try to go inside the house, but he stops me, I glare at him, I can't believe this about him.
"Your relationship with him is lost. Let's put it the way you paint it, but your son's relationship with him is very different, you don't do something that you can't stop later.”
I smile bitterly, only I know why I do things, they are better that way, “each action has its reaction, you know that better than anyone," I shrug off his grip and open the door.
"He'll be here in half an hour, you better talk to him." Hearing that gives me chills, denying, I enter, I must get out of here as soon as possible.
"But what are you doing?" Asks my friend from behind me.
"I'll stay in a hotel today." I readied the bag with my son's things, I put it on my shoulder to take him in my arms.
"Is this a damn joke?" Laughs my incredulous friend, “are you crazy? It's getting dark Marilí, stop the idiocy.”












