by the river

It's crazy to force yourself to forget the person who reminds you of everything you do. I would wake up in the morning on the other side of the bed thinking that Maverick was there and sound asleep.

I would cook a meal then would just stare at the thin air while contemplating his absence. Before I knew it, I needed to make another breakfast because my food was already burning.

I'll eat alone, sleep alone, and cry alone. I have experienced being alone for a long time but I was not as sad as I am now. I felt like I lost a part of myself and I can only be happy and content if I take it back.

It's been over a month now but I'm not coping well. The loneliness I feel only gets worse.

Adding to the emptiness I experience is living here in the place where Maverick and I first met. Everything in this place reminds me of him. When I go to the plaza and to the proper town, he is always the one I remember, especially when I choose to spend the whole day by the river like today.

He first talked to me. He also gave me the anklet here that I had completely lost. I have regretted it a lot because it's the only thing that connects us but I can't find it anymore.

I wiped the tears from my face and stood up. I took off my t-shirt and shorts and just left my panties and bra. I jumped into the river and started swimming. Through swimming, I get peace. This is where I get a sliver of pleasure.

I went up for a moment to catch some air before I immersed myself again under the water. If it's only possible to stay here forever, I'll do it. I want to stay underwater forever. What is my life for if it doesn't matter to me anymore?

I smiled as I slowly ran out of air. It's better this way. Maybe there's no more pain out there.

Suddenly out of nowhere, a pair of strong arms caught my waist and pulled me up above the water. I gasped as I stared at Maverick's wet and worried face. He looked so real that I began to tear up again.

I smiled at him. Have I gone completely crazy to see the man in front of me? Am I really this pathetic to hallucinate and convince myself that he owns the arms that wrap around me? I can even hear the sound of his heartbeats and his warmth against my cold body.

I reached for his cheek and caressed it. I don't care if it's just my hallucination or what. I'm too distraught to identify what's real from not. My tears flowed as I reached for his nape. I kissed him with all the longing in me. My tears welled up even more when Maverick responded.

How strong is my imagination to conjure Maverick to be kissing me the same way I'm kissing him?

He pulled me closer so I could feel his hardness in my thigh. My eyes widened and I immediately moved my lips away from him because of the realization.

I cupped his face and stared at him bewildered.

"Y-you're real?" I asked, stunned.

He did not answer me. He pulled me again to him and captured my lips for a searing kiss. I suppressed my emotion and pushed him away but he didn’t let me. Instead, he steadied me and grind his hips against mine. I moaned and clasped my hands around his neck as I responded to the kiss.

I can't fight against my body when it comes to Maverick. He knew my body more than I did.

"Don't push me away again, Fem. Don't fight us please," he said while drying off my tears through his kisses.

I did not answer. I pulled him over and kissed him again. My hand went down under the water and rubbed his body. He pulled my bra off and threw it into the water.

He squeezed me in the ass and pushed his bulging hardness even harder into my softness. My head spinned in sensation.

He briefly ended the kiss and began to walk out of the water. All the time I did not take my eyes off him for fear that he would just vanish in thin air. Even if there is no denying the warmth of his hold on me and the hard membrane that's hitting my thigh.

He lowered me to the mat. I opened my legs to him. We wasted no more moments. He trailed kisses on my neck down to my two turgid peaks and even down further in my most sensitive part where it aches the most.

He hurriedly took off my black panty and threw it away. He slung my leg on both of his shoulders and began kissing me on the most sensitive part of my body. He licked me and sucked my clit which drove me crazy. I screamed softly when he inserted his tongue inside me.

"Oh shit," I whispered. His highly skilled mouth is giving me again that pleasure I have been deprived of for months.

"Mav, please ..." I pulled his hair to convey my message to him. He got my message and positioned himself on top of me. He lowered his brief to his thigh and moved his foot to remove it completely. He strokes his maleness while looking hard at me.

I could no longer hold back. I pulled Maverick down on me and kissed him. I took his hand from down there and put my hand on him. I stroked it slowly and teasingly until he began pumping in my hand.

He released me from the kiss and grabbed my hands and lifted them above my head. He held his dick and slowly pushed it inside me. I held my breath until he was fully inside me.

Maverick looked at me with a blush. He didn't move at first and just caressed my face. I close my eyes to the overflowing emotions that have been engulfing me.

He kissed my closed eyes tenderly and began moving at a very slow pace.

"I miss you so much. I miss being inside you, your tightness and wetness. I'm going crazy the whole time that we're not together, Femella."

Crying, I buried my face in his neck and followed his rhythm.

"I'm sorry, Mav. I'm really sorry," I whispered.

He hugged me tighter as his movement quickened. He stopped for a second, rubbed the back of my head and moved even faster. I clung to his shoulder and met the intensity in his eyes.

He lowered himself to kiss me and I responded wholeheartedly. I bit his lip when I reached the climax. He slowed down again to give me time to recover.

Still panting from my orgasm, I urged him to go on by initiating the movement.

"Fuck..." he muttered.

Sweat trickled down his red face to mine as he pumped harder and faster. I felt him getting close so I touched his face. I always love to look at him when he's about to fall into pieces. Something magical is in his expression every time he achieves orgasm and ejaculates inside me.

He gave one long thrust before I felt his seeds spilled inside me. Chasing his breath, he pressed his face to my neck as his other hand continued to caress my breast.

I leaned over and rubbed my thigh against his waist as he started to come in and out again. Heat and need enveloped my body again.

"Mav ..." I sobbed as he quickened his pace.

He was already running over me so he raised his elbow to my side while confining my whole body from my chest with his body. I can feel that I'm nearing the edge again. His every move was tearing me apart, his jaws were locked and his eyes were red from tears and desire.

I reached for him and kissed him tenderly. I convey with a kiss my months of longing for him. He responded as sweetly and as affectionately.

I felt that inviting feeling again as if you were being lifted up in the air to the sky.

And in seconds, Maverick and I reached the glory together.

Soften and exhausted, I held Maverick's arm. My whole body was wet and we were both chasing our breath.

"I love you, Femella. From then until now please, don't ever leave me. Don't ask me to let go of you again because the next time you say that, I'll never be able to fulfill your wish. I'll do anything you say as long as you don't just ask me to leave you," he whispered as he showered little kisses on my face.

I was not able to answer him so I just cried again. He's right, it makes no sense to be separated from each other.

Maverick got up and picked up our scattered clothes on the grass. He never bothered to conceal his naked body. We got dressed and helped fix the mat.

No one was talking to each other on the way home. He just held my hand while squeezing them sometimes. When we got home, I immediately faced him who went straight to the fridge to look for food. He glanced over me while picking out a canister of leftover food.

"I know you want us to talk but let's save that later. Take a shower first. I'll cook. I didn't have my lunch yet."

I did not budge from standing. I just stood there like a statue while staring at the man like he was some sort of an apparition. He laughed from kneeling in front of my small red and then hugged me. I responded with a tighter hug while crying again.

"Hey, hey." He cupped my face and wiped off my tears. "Don't cry. I'm real, okay. I'm not your imagination. I'm real."

He kissed my lips.

"See? Feel that? You want us to repeat what we did before so you won't have any doubts? Hmmm?" He teasingly licked my neck.

Still blurred with tears, I pushed him away.

"You're really crazy."

He chuckled.

"You'll get sick if you just let your clothes dry on your body," he reminded me.

I wiped my face then nodded.

"I know. I'll just be quick."

I ran into the bedroom and took a quick shower. After I got dressed and wrapped the towel around my head, I went out immediately. I caught him mixing something on a stove. There was also a black traveling bag on top of the wooden table.

He turned to me before turning off the fire. He caught me staring at his bag.

"I'm a boy scout," he explained and picked up the bag. "Can I take a shower first before we talk?"

I nodded.

"Yeah. We'll talk after you eat."

I prepared the table while he's showering. He cooked my leftover tuna last night and put different sorts of greens on it. I sat down in the chair and fell into deep thought and was just awoken from the sound of the bedroom door opening.

Maverick is walking towards me in his low waist shorts and white shirt. He winked at me before sitting down in the chair next to me and starting to eat. He ate so enthusiastically that it looks like he hasn't eaten for days. I stood up and took the towel over my head and began to dry his hair.

"Your cupboard is full of processed foods. That's bad for your body. Let's go to the grocery store tomorrow to replace those junk foods of yours," he whispered in silence between his delicious mouthfuls.

"All right. Let's do that."

After he ate, he led me to sit on the sofa in the living room to talk. He hasn't started yet but my eyes are already clouded with tears. He hugged me and kissed my forehead. I rested my head on his chest and closed my eyes. I relished the moment of being wrapped in his arms again.

"My memories have returned."

It was as if I heard a bomb explode at what he said. I was stunned. Does it mean that his love for Trisha has returned as well? If so, is it really just closure sex that he came here for?

I pulled myself away from him but he wouldn’t let me. My lips quivered so I averted my gaze as he attempted to meet my eyes. I couldn’t bear to see him telling me that he was going back to Trisha. Why does he have to come here? I hope he just keeps everything to himself.

"... and I have returned to you," he added.

I looked up at him. "W-why? Why do you have to be here when we know you're going to leave me?"

I bowed my head as my tears continued to fall.

He grabbed me by the chin and lifted my face so he could look at me.

"Who's going to leave? Definitely not me. Why would I leave here if the person I loved from then until now is here? Who's the foolish one to go? Certainly not me. I'm too greedy to let you go."

My tears stopped falling. What the hell is he talking about?

"I thought you remembered everything?"

He leaned forward in his chair and nodded.

"Yes, I did."

"So why are you here? Shouldn't you be there with Trisha?"

He reached for my cheek and pinched it.

"With memories or not, I don't have any feelings for her. But we won't have that problem because I remember since then that it's you I like."

His hand moved to my other cheek and pinched it.

I slapped his hand away from me.

"Be serious, Maverick. Is this your way of revenge? By playing tricks on me?"

My mood changed when I walked out to the terrace.