Her Past III : Rape Me

Sana Pov's

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"This is what you called love? if you love me then you will never force yourself on me" I screeched but like he didn't care about my tears or pay any heed to my words. He came closer to me to kiss me but I turned my head to the other side. He kissed my cheeks. I clutched the bedsheet and closed my eyes... anticipation ran through my veins. What would he do now? will he rape me?

"no" I screamed in my mind.

"I have to do something. I can't give up like this. No one can touch me without my consent, even if he is my husband. if I'm not comfortable then he has to understand this. I have to protect myself. If I give up today, I will probably never be able to fight for myself again. yes, I have to fight for myself" I was lost in my thoughts when I heard someone's giggle. I opened my eyes and found Richard sitting in the corner laughing loudly holding his stomach...

"Ohh god.. look at your face" he laughed... I sat on the bed and looked at him confusingly.

"You actually thought that I would force myself on you. how can you even think like that" he started laughing again. I frowned and hit him with a pillow and soon tears welled up in my eyes. He stopped laughing seeing my tears.

"Ohh love" he muttered and sat beside me and sucked my tears, cupping my face. I closed my eyes.

"I don't want to become the villain of anyone's story... I am the king of this story and why would I do something which will hurt my wife? I respect you and your dignity" a smile came on my face. I open my eyes and look at him.

"take your time but please have some mercy on your husband. please accept my love and this marriage as soon as possible because only I know how I'm controlling myself from having you"

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I breathed heavily with each word and felt a little nervous. This is all so new for me. I was looking everywhere but not for him.

"Can I cuddle you? I hope you don't have a problem with that" He asked. I nodded and soon he attached his lips to me.. kissing me passionately and deeply. He bit on my lower lip.

"Richard" I moan and don't know why his soft kiss turns into rough.

"aah,'' I hissed when he bit me so hard. I can taste blood on my lips. He parted and touched my lips with my finger and then looked at my finger. there was blood. He was mad at me but what I did... I started remembering everything that happened a while ago, I realised I called him by his name.

"I'm sorry... I'm sorry Ri... I mean Alpha... I'm sorry"

"You should be... only one person has a right to call me Richard and that was my Luna," he said. I looked at him shockingly and soon his expression changed and he started laughing.

"look at your reaction" he was laughing continuously. "I was just joking, '' he said. I hit him on his chest and he hugged me.

.

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I didn't even know how the time passed. It has been one month since our marriage. I can't even remember when I was so happy in my life as I was in this last month with Richard. he loves me a lot. He cares for me. In my whole life, I have always craved love and he fulfilled all the emptiness in my life. Today is Richard's birthday and I was preparing a cake. That's when he came from behind and hugged me. I was about to scream that's when I realised whose touch is this.

"Ohh god you scare me" I muttered

"Sorry.. what can I do... you're looking so smoking hot that I couldn't control myself" I blushed. he started kissing my neck

"Richard" I awkwardly distance myself from him. We had been married for a month, yet I was not comfortable with Richard's touch and intimacy. I looked at him nervously because I know I angered him again by distancing myself but he had a smile on his face. He was looking at the cake. I took a relieved breath. I hardly fear anything in this world, but my heart trembles with Richard's anger. it's not that he beat me but his little angry voice was enough for me to shiver in fear. His alpha aura is really scary. I know he will never hurt me but still, I felt scared of his anger.

"What are you thinking?" he asked, finding me lost in my thoughts. I nod in the negative, he took my hand in his and kissed my knuckles.

"I will be late after attending my birthday party. wait for me till I came"

"I'm not coming with you?" I asked

"I don't want anyone to see my beautiful wife. It's only me who can see you" he came closer and held me to my waist. I was about to distance myself but he tightened his grip indicating to me that he will not leave me. "Only I have a right to touch you, to smell you, to have you," he said.

"Alpha"

"yes, my slave" I stopped speaking when he called me slave. I just hate it when he calls me this name but can I say something.. no.. it will increase his anger and I can't anger him, especially when he is holding me because he always tightens his grip on me whenever I make him angry and it hurts.

"I want you to wear red today," he said, locking my hair behind my ear.

"Red?"

"yaa in red dress with red inner wears because today I want you as my birthday gift. I hope you will not deny and fulfil your duty as a wife and yaa I'm not asking you because I know you're ready... as you love me" he winks and leaves the room.

"moon goddess. I'm not ready yet but why? He loves me and I.." I started thinking about our relationship. He loves me but what about me?

"what are you thinking Sana.. he's your husband. It's obvious you love him and don't forget he's the only one in this world who loves you. He always cares about you and your happiness. now it's your duty to make him happy and to fulfil all your duties." I said to myself and decided that today I will give him all his rights over me.

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At night, I was waiting for him sitting in the hall as he asked me not to go into our room until he came. I wore a red saree as his order and a beautician came and did light makeup on my face. She applied dark lipstick to my lips. I saw myself in the mirror and no doubt I was looking gorgeous. I knew how fast my heart was beating at this time... It felt like running away because I was not ready to take another step in this marriage yet. He loves me, he cares for me, he adores me, he does everything that a wife wants in his husband but still, I'm not able to love him. I felt like I'm not his, I'm bound to someone else and I know there is no use in thinking like that. I have to accept him. He's my husband after all.

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"you're nervous Sana.. calm down.. nothing will happen. you're thinking too much" I was renting the same thing again and again in my mind. After a while, I saw every servant and maid leaving the house. I look at them confusingly.

"Mary," I called one of the maids.

"Yes ma'am," she asked. I could see fear in her eyes. I never scold or yell at her or any servant but don't know why, everyone in this house is scared of coming close to me and that's the biggest reason I always feel alone when Richard is not around me even many times in his presence. Also, I feel empty, like something is missing in my life.

"Where are you all going?" I asked.

"Sir told us to leave this house at 10.00 pm. before he came. He must be on his way."

"But why?"

"He wants you two to be alone," she said. I mentally slapped myself for embarrassing myself in front of her.

"Ohh god.. he wants us to be alone. there is no backout. He was so excited to take our marriage to the next step" I thought and started scratching the back of my hand with my nails.

"Ma'am, can I go?" she asked

"huh?"

"Please ma'am let me go. if sir saw me then no one can save me," she muttered in fear.

"Why are you always scared of me?" I asked. She didn't reply.

"You can go," I said. She immediately runs towards the door. I picked up my mobile from the table to call him but that's when someone snatched it from my hand. I looked at my side and found Richard standing there staring at me from head to toe.

"Whom you were calling?" he asked, pulling me closer, encircling his hand on my waist. I breathed heavily as today I wore a saree and there was no cloth on my waist. for the first time, someone touching me like this.

"Alpha" I muttered nervously and tried to push him but he didn't move a little bit.

"I asked you something" he kissed at the corner of my lips. I can see the lust in his eyes. I bow down my eyes.

"I was calling you only as all the servants " before I could complete he picked me up in his arms and took me towards our room.

"You know what, you're looking so tempting and gorgeous that my junior is already throbbing to ravish your innocence," he grinned. His words only increased my nervousness and anticipation ran through me about what will happen next. He opened the door of our room and got me down. I looked around, the whole room was decorated with red roses and scented candles. He hugged me from behind, pressing his body with mine.

"Did you like it?" he asked. I didn't reply as my whole focus was on his hand which was roaming all over my body and believe me I didn't like even a bit of it. I don't know why I'm feeling like shit. He roughly pressed my blossom and I hissed in pain.

"Aah Alpha" I yelp in pain as he bites on my neck harshly

"Yes, moan for me baby," he said. didn't he get that it was my painful scream, not a moan? He turned me towards him. I was about to deny him that's when he kissed my forehead.

"You don't know how much I waited for this day... for our first night.. thank you so much for letting me touch you," he said and started kissing me on my lips and the last thought of resisting him vanished with his word. he loved me so much, how can I hurt him saying no... No, I can't do this. I decided that I will not stop him today. I didn't realise when he unfold the plates of my saree and remove them while kissing me until I felt his hand roaming on my bare back. He picked me up and took me towards the bed and soon he removed all the hindrance between us. I closed my eyes and held the bed sheet tightly, feeling embarrassed as I was lying naked under him. He parted my legs and then I felt immense pain down there. I opened my eyes widely.

"Aah," I screamed because of so much pain. I started hitting him and tried to push him but he didn't budge. I had read in many books that it's painful but I never thought this would be this much pain. I felt like something was breaking inside me in two parts.

I thought he would give me some time to adjust to his size but he didn't. He started thrusting deep inside me. I started crying because of the pain. I was about to scream but he put his hand on my mouth and started kissing me on my neck. I was just praying that all this thing would end soon. After some minutes, I adjusted to his size and the pain I felt earlier became less but the way he was handling me was so rough that it was hurting me. I never thought that what people called "special and pleasurable" in reality would be so painful. I started feeling the pressure inside and soon I come. he too came after thrusting more than five times. I thought this pain would end now but then he took me again, and again and again. my body gave up after coming more than five times but he didn't stop and soon darkness consumed me.