Feeling Restless
Alex Pov's
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"You can take all this dress out ... I'm not going to wear any dress nor I'm going to attend any Luna ceremony" I heard Sana when I was outside the room, talking to Max about the arrangement.
I felt a sting of pain when she said that without thinking for once. Does it mean she doesn't want this relationship? She doesn't want to live with me. I came out of my thoughts when Max called me a little loudly.
"Alpha, Are you okay?" He asked and I can sense that he is concerned for me. I nodded with a smile.
"Luna just said that she will not attend the Luna ceremony." Max mumbled and bowed his head. "what if she didn't attain the Luna ceremony?"
"I asked her for a chance, Max. Now it's up to her whether she wants to live her life with me or to break this bond. I don't want to force her into an unwanted relationship" He looked at me dumbstruck but then nodded his head.
We moved towards the auditorium where he was looking at me like something bothering him.
"What happened, Max? Do you want to say something?" I stopped and looked at him.
"Yes Alpha," He said and then bowed his head nervously. I sighed, knowing that whatever he wanted to say was related to Sana.
"Say without any hesitation"
"Alpha if Luna didn't attend the ceremony then everyone will make fun of you. There are many Alpha from different packs who came here to show their gratitude towards you but what will happen when Luna would disrespect you by not coming to the ceremony" He said worriedly.
"First, I believe that she will come. I know she had a feeling for me, it's just that she was not able to accept it because of her painful past" I said, rubbing my forehead. "And the second thing, She will not disrespect me by not coming into Luna's ceremony. It's her life and she has all the right to decide what she wants. I marked her forcefully to save her and Maya's life but I don't want to force myself on her or bind her in an unwanted relationship."
"And what if she didn't come?" He asked.
"She will come... I can guarantee you she will come and answer your question. If by chance she didn't come then I will accept her decision. I will free her from this unwanted relationship" I said and my heartbeat rose and I felt broken just with the thought of losing her. I can't live without her but for her sake, I'm ready to die.
My eyes went to Sana who was standing behind Max. I look back at Max angrily, I'm sure he must have felt Sana's presence and that's why he asked that question. I nodded my head in disappointment.
"I should leave Alpha" He bowed his head and then left from there. Sana came to me. I looked at her with a smiling face where she was staring at me with teary eyes and had no emotion on her face. Don't know what's going on in her head.
I raised my eyebrow. She extended my phone to me.
"It was ringing continuously that's why I thought to give it to you," she said.
"Thank you" I mumbled and took my phone from her hand. I was about to turn to go to the auditorium when she called my name.
"Alex"
"Yes" I turned towards her. she was looking at me nervously while scratching the back of her hand. I held her hand and moved my thumb gently over the back of her hand. She scratched herself badly.
"What did you do? It must be hurting." I scolded her. "There is no need to feel nervous because of me. you can say whatever you want" I said. She nodded her head and smiled.
"You said you don't want to force me but right now from my point of view, you're forcing me to accept you again. Why don't you understand I need time? I need time for myself. I want to decide with my will but again someone put me into a condition." A tear rolled from her eyes but before I could wipe them, she wiped them off quickly and smiled sadly.
"I know you love me, Sana, that's why I asked for a chance and it's all up to you whether you want to give me a chance or not. I'm not forcing you" I said and kissed her forehead.
"But I'm not ready… You're doing the same thing which Richard did to me. He kept saying that I love him and I believe his words but later I realised that I never felt for him. He used to do this only, always forcing me to make a decision" Before she could complete, I pulled her towards me angrily holding her in her arms.
"Alex, you're hurting me" she mumbled looking at me with devastating eyes and I immediately realised that in anger, I held her tightly. I loosen my grip but didn't leave her where she was trying to get rid of my hold because of fear.
"Why do you always compare me with that bastard? why?" I grunt. she flinched and closed her eyes.
"Please leave me... please... please don't hurt me" She uttered. I immediately left her.
"Why? Why do you think that I will hurt you" I asked in a numb voice. It hurts to see her like this. She didn't reply and ran towards our room. I didn't stop her and wiped the tear from the corner of my eyes.
I went to the auditorium where everyone had gathered around for the Luna ceremony. Many Alphas and their Luna came to congratulate me and my Luna but I don't even know if my queen will come or not.
My heart says that she will come but I don't know why. Still, there is a fear that she will not give me a chance.
Time was passing like sand and everyone was waiting for Luna to come and Alpha to introduce his Mate to everyone. I was looking at the door, again and again, to check if she came but there was no sign of her. I can see many people talking behind my back and making fun of me but right now, all I care about is my Luna, My queen, my lifeline, my everything... Sana…
"Are you sure Alpha will come because it's almost the end of the night? Let's end this Luna ceremony… Everyone is making fun of us" Max said, whispering near me as slowly as he can but somewhere he also knows that everyone here is a werewolf and they can hear us.
"She will '' I answered. That's when I started feeling ominous like something is not ok... I look around to look if there is any danger over the pack. Everything was ok but still, I was feeling restless. That's when the thought of Sana came into my mind.
I was about to go outside the auditorium to check on her when Max came in front of me. I glared at him furiously and he bowed his head in respect.
"Sorry Alpha but everyone is already talking behind your back about Luna and if you leave like this then they will get more gossip" He mumbled. I sighed and looked around. He is right that I can't live like this when I'm the one who organised this party. It's ethically not good
"I know but I have to go Max... I don't know why I'm feeling like Sana is not ok" I said
"Then let me go and check the security of Luna, Alpha," He said and a smile came on my face seeing him respecting Sana. I know he doesn't like him but still, he is doing all this for me.
"Ok," I said. He nodded and went to check Sana where I again checked the security of the pack in case the danger is on the pack where my whole focus is on Sana. Don't know why I'm feeling like I made the biggest mistake by organising this Luna ceremony.












