Chapter 11

THE LAST FIFTEEN MINUTES RIDE had been a silent nightmare.

They'd both stayed mute, unwilling to talk as they wrestled with their inner thoughts of what-ifs.

When they reached home, Dawn got out of the car as soon as it stopped and quickly walked into the house without waiting or checking to see if he'd followed behind but he did and before she could climb the stairs, he grabbed her hand to stop her.

"Dawn, honey, I'm sorry okay. I shouldn't have let her get that close" he stated, trying to pull her close but Dawn freed herself and walked ahead of him to their bedroom.

His words might have been sincere and genuine but she didn't care, at least not now. Not now that her body boiled with a type of anger she couldn't describe.

She knew about his past, she knew he'd probably slept with half the women in the Boroughs of New York City, she just never really wanted to accept it and frankly, she didn't expect the reality of it to sting so bad.

She stormed into the room and threw her purse on the bed, piling her off her dress subsequently, and all the while she did it, David watched her.

He didn't know what else to say, he didn't know what else to tell her. He was at a loss for words and honestly, his brain was too tired to think up anything.

Dawn grabbed fresh clothes from the walk-in closet and tossed them on. She picked up a cushion, about walking out but David hurried over to the door and kicked it shut.

His grey eyes found hers that stared back with open hostility "I've apologized. Why are you still so angry?"

Dawn said nothing, just tried to maneuver her way around the door but he'd blocked all passage.

"I asked you a question" His tone held a hint of annoyance as he spoke those words.

"I don't want to talk" she stated, trying to reach for the handle but he blocked her path and held her wrist from trying any further.

"Let's talk"

"I said I don't want to!" She pulled her hand out of his grasp harshly.

"I'm trying my best here Dawn. I'm trying my best to understand you, to feel what you feel but I just don't get it, this shouldn't be enough to get you this upset" at this point, he was getting irritated and tired from wearing a tight blazer all day.

She should have been the one to take it off. They should've been in bed now, he should've stripped her bare and they should be making love but she'd rather argue baselessly than get naked with him.

"You wouldn't understand David. You wouldn't even if you tried and do you know why? Because you've had women stick their hands far up your ass that you don't see what's right or wrong anymore"

He tightened his fists, his frustration causing him to become upset.  "You have no right to throw insults at my face Dawn"

She chuckled humorlessly. "It's ironic, isn't it. You can see when I'm throwing insults at you but you're too blind to see when a woman is throwing herself at you"

"Penelope wasn't throwing herself at me!" He bit off, irate.

"You could not see it because I was the one standing there! Me! I watched her talking about wanting to enact old times. She said she fucking had what you like!" She shot back.

"For the last time, I didn't sleep with Penelope!"

"And you expect me to believe you! I'm not that naïve!"

"Do you think I'd seriously lie to you! What do you honestly take me for!"

She shook her head softly and chuckled "This is the reason right? This is the reason why you don't want to have kids with me. You're probably waiting for me to get old or loose so you can continue to enact old days with women"

David sank his fingers into his hair and nearly pulled on it "Jesus fucking Christ, Dawn! I thought we talked about this?!"

"You talked, I listened!"

He slapped his hand on his forehead and muttered something incoherent under his breath.

"What did you say?"

"Fuck, nothing. Forget it. I'm tired"

"Oh, you're tired. How convenient"

"I said I'm fucking tired okay — you know what, you take the room, I'll be leaving"

"You're not running away from this conversation David!"

"Watch me" he opened the door and walked out.

"Where're you going. We're not done yet" she prodded, following behind as he walked towards the base of the stairs and headed to the kitchen.

"I'm not fighting with you Dawn" he walked to the fridge, pulled a bottle of water out, and looked over his shoulder at her. "I'm not doing this"

"Oh, you are. We are doing this and you're going to give me answers because I've had enough and if you don't start talking I'll—"

"For the love of God. why do you keep bringing this up?!" He yelled, slamming his hand against the counter.

"Maybe if you give me a reason not to, I won't!" She bit, holding up his intimidating gaze.

"But I've told you I'm not ready yet"

"Fine you're not ready, what about me?" She jabbed her hand In her chest. "Am I suppose to wait till you're ready and when is that gonna be. Next year the next! When David!"

His shoulders heaved as he took a deep breath in and then sighed it out "Can we just go to bed Dawn. Everything was perfect. Tonight was going fine. Let's not ruin it"

For all it was worth, he needed sex, and not just any random one, he wanted the feel of his wife but she now proved difficult.

"I'm not gonna take your shits this time David" she snapped the keys from the table with a huge click "It's either you give me answers or I walk out that door and if I do, you're not getting me back, David. I swear"

"Dawn I married you because I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you and not because I want to have fucking children. Goddamit. Aren't I enough for you?"

"Don't Change the subject, David answer it!"

"I honestly don't know what you want to hear me say"

"Just tell me why David, why don't you want kids?"

His head darted down. "You wouldn't understand" it was complicated, not something he could just say, she just wouldn't understand.

"I'm willing to understand, David but first you have to tell me"

David looked up. He parted his lips but nothing came out except a slow exhale. "I can't, Dawn..."

Her hands fell limply to her side as she inhaled deeply and pressed her eyes close for a brief moment before opening them back up. "Well, congratulations," she said, her voice softer than he'd expected. "You've made your choice and now I know where I stand"

David didn't move. He stood there, eyes closed as his heart pounded relentlessly against his chest.

The front door suddenly shut and when he looked up she was gone.

The car engine started.

She hadn't been joking.

He should have stopped her.

But he didn’t.

She was leaving, she was leaving him.

"Fuck!" He ran outside. "Dawn wait!"

"It's too late David" she wiped her tears away and hit drive but he suddenly jumped in front of her car and placed both hands on it.

Her eyes grew impossibly wide as she immediately grabbed the breaks. "David what are you doing?!"

"It's either you run me over or step out and let's finish this," he said, his hand still on her car with no hint of letting go.

"There is nothing to finish. Just get out of the way David"

"No, Dawn"

She clutched the wheel tight and hit it a few times before turning off the car, stepping out and stomping towards him.

David straightened his back. He'd parted his lips but before he had the chance to speak, her hand struck across his face.

She'd slapped him, the force of it making his face turn to the side and the suddenness making him freeze in that position — his eyes wide with surprise and his cheek red.

"Are you insane?!" She blurted, breathing angrily with a conviction that shocked even her. "Don't do fucking try what you did ever again! I could have run you over, you idiot!"

David turned his head to look at her, a hand coming up to rub his sore cheek.

They stood there, eyes locked for a long minute.

"You're just a fucking moron," she muttered, trying to ignore the beaten look in his eyes but it only made her heart ache more.

Maybe she shouldn't have slapped him, but who could blame her, she was scared, terrified — didn't take him as a moron who would step in front of a moving car, and honestly, she —

She yelped, suddenly thrown out of her thoughts as he pulled her into his chest and slammed his mouth against hers, capturing her lips in a searing kiss that she hated herself for returning immediately.

Her heartbeat shot up and she found herself almost leaning into him but in a split second of regaining herself, her hands flattened against his solid chest and she pushed him off, gasping for air the minute he was away from her mouth.

"Are you out of your mind?!" She cursed, staring at him with confusion but David said nothing, he took a step closer, eyes glued on hers and she had expected him to kiss her again or grab her hand and pull her forward but he took hold of her waist and hauled her over his shoulder.

"David!" She screamed as he clamped one arm around her, just below her butt, and walked into the house.

He turned toward the stairs and she fisted his shirt as she bumped against him every time he took a stair upward.

When they got to the top of the stairs, she'd been urged to be let down but he ignored her helpless attempts to break free and carried her into the room before throwing her on the bed.

"What did you do that for?!" She exclaimed, stretching her hands out to steady herself, but it was useless because he kicked his shoes off, tossed away his blazer, and fell over her with his lips capturing hers in yet another kiss that she couldn't refuse.

"David" she mumbled "David get off me" she managed to let out but his greedy hands were already everywhere.

He tugged her dress up, his fingertips trailing burning pleasure across her heated skin, and in one instant, she was hot everywhere, a tightly wound bundle of desire bringing her awareness back just long enough to realize she should not be doing this.  She needed to stop. She didn't want him to win.

"I swear to God, I'll fucking kill you myself if you don't —" she choked on her spit as his hand snaked into her panties.

David groaned at the wetness he found there. He slid his finger up and down her soaked slit before shoving it inside of her and she clenched at the sudden intrusion, but he didn't stop, he eased another finger inside her and thrust them —his thumb teasing the edge of her clit every time he pushed his fingers inside her and once again, all her awareness drowned in pleasure and need.

David groaned. He could hardly control his pent-up need and frustration. When he'd kissed her, he hadn't expected a response, he'd anticipated another slap to his face but instead, she kissed him back and now she was wet, very wet, and moving beneath him, guiding him to her. He couldn't resist the hunger any longer.

"Make love now, settle later?" He asked, hips bucking against her thigh as his fingers thrust into her mercilessly.

"What are you waiting for, moron," she breathed, shooting her hand to the front of his pants.

"Careful or you may get more than you bargained for" he growled.

"Not at this rate" she gripped his hardened bulge with a little more force than she probably should.

"Now you've gone and done it" he groaned, pulling his fingers out from her pulsing wet sex and leaning back enough to fumble with his pants.

She was certainly going to get more than she bargained for and maybe after that, they could come to terms with each other, but now — "Now. Turn around and get on all fours"