xxii

I held my breath tightly, wondering how long I could fight the urge to jump out of the car.

Although I knew I would be more of a hindrance to Malio than a help - I found the thought of doing nothing and just waiting for something to happen unbearable.

"Malio," I heard a man's voice. "What are you doing here? This is our neighborhood," Malio replied, unimpressed. I immediately noticed the arrogance and hubris in his voice, which made him sound exactly like his father.

"I didn't think you were in the position to make demands, boy," said another, much deeper, male voice.

"Shut up, Bruno. This is Malio Dakarias. He could shoot us all before a bullet or even a punch hit him. I've heard a lot about you - they say you're even more dangerous than your father."

The words made me shudder. I laced my fingers together, hoping that would calm the shaking.

"You tell yourself that, eh?" Malio replied, amused. He didn't seem intimidated at all, despite the fact that he was facing four grown men, two of whom, as I could see through the side mirror, ran to the gym at least daily and lifted weights I could only dream of.

Not to mention the tall, lean man in the middle, who, like Malio, still had his pistol in his hand. They didn't point them at each other, but the quiet presence alone cast the alley in a somber mood.

"Oh yeah. They say you're more unerring, merciless and brutal," the slim stranger listed. Malio's cold laugh wafted through the alley.

"But people don't tell people that you have a girlfriend." There was something dangerous in the man's statement this time, while he looked past Malio and pointed the gun at the car. The threat that was in his words lay could be heard clearly and distinctly.

"I don't know what you mean." Malio replied, no less threateningly. "Oh, Malio. You know exactly what I mean - and if that's true..." "Are you done with your chat? "Malio interrupted him annoyed. "Are we getting impatient?" laughed the man. ,, Yes I will. And it's also true what people say about the things that happen when I get impatient."

I looked in the wing mirror and was horrified to see one of the burly guys swinging the baseball bat dangerously close to Malio's head.

"Are you serious?" Malio asked, laughing, "You won't get me down with that."

"Is it true that you were shot?", the man motioned for his men to put down their bats with a single short gesture. "That's correct." ,, What happened to the perpetrator? Malio hesitated. "What did you do to him, Malio?" The man's voice suggested that he already knew the answer to that.

Hadn't Malio told me his father wanted to take care of it?

"I only did what you would have done," Malio finally replies. "They say he was tortured to death, you got yourself in trouble. You'll need this agreement between us in the future .So think about what you are willing to risk, my dear friend."

"Men!", the voice of the supposed leader suddenly turned loudly to his followers. "We're going. See you, Malio. Say hello to your father!"

After a few minutes, Malio came back to the car while the men pushed past the car on my side. I didn't dare look at her, not wanting to draw any more attention to myself.

When the young man, who I guessed to be in his mid-twenties now, from close proximity, stopped at the window and gently tapped the glass and then waved with a grin, my stomach clenched.

There was something odd about him, almost frightening.

It wasn't the silent menace that vibrated with every word, every step, and every look like Malio's father was - he was much more a mad menace, from someone who had already seen so much that he was completely ignorant of it had lost his mind.

There was a knock again. Intuitively I knew he wouldn't go away until I got a look. I focused on the blonde hair that he wore in a casual men bun.

When he knocked on the glass again, Malio cleared his throat. "What's that supposed to be?" "I just want to say _Hello_ to her!" I heard the man's voice through the glass. "You did that now. Make sure you go!" Malio said angrily. "Okay, okay - I'm not going to take your toys away from you!"

Malio didn't open the Lamborghini's door until the La Cruels' black car pulled out of the alley. "Are you okay?" Malio asked me worriedly, even though it was he who was in danger the entire time.

I nodded silently and stretched out my hand to him. As he grabbed it, I pulled him into the driver's seat and crawled onto his lap.

"Jolien?" I heard the puzzlement in his voice as I wrapped my arms around his neck and cried softly. "What's wrong?" He sounded even more worried. ,, Are you stupid? Just walk out there, I thought they'd kill you!" I sobbed, not sure if he even understood a single word of what I was saying since my voice was so choked.

"Calm down!" he said carefully while gently rubbing my back. But his touch only made me cry more. "I thought I was losing you!" I knew I was about to was to get worked up about my fear for him.

"Jolien!" Malio pulled me back a few millimeters to look me straight in the eyes. "Stop crying please. I'm fine!"

He wiped the tears from my wet cheeks with his thumb. "I..." my voice broke. "I wouldn't have stayed in the car! I know I couldn't have done anything but I couldn't have sat here and watched them do it" I didn't know why I told him that . I just had the urge to be honest.

His eyes widened. For a moment he lost his composure. I saw that he was fighting the rising anger my disobedience provoked.

Although I hated the word, which is exactly what it was - after all, he asked me for my promise and I lied to him with the certainty that I would break it when it came down to it.

However, it only took Malio a few seconds to regain control of his expression.

"Never lie to me again. If this is to work, it is important that you do what I tell you in such situations. Not because my life depends on it, but because your life depends on it first and foremost," he said coldly.

He didn't even wait for a reaction, but continued directly: "I can't protect you if you don't follow my instructions, my orders - I'm only talking about situations like yesterday or just now. Did you understand that?"

I nodded again.

"No, say it!" He grabbed my face roughly and thus thwarted my plan to avert my eyes in advance.

His fingers dug deep into my skin as he tightened his grip and pulled my face to his. ,, Say it!"

I swallowed and squirmed under his grip.

His dominance was just too much for me at that moment. Mainly because I now felt that it was not a playful power struggle, but that he meant every word seriously. "Malio. Please let me go!" I whispered.

"No, Jolie. You wanted this, wanted me with every fiber of my dark being, so look at me and say god damn shit you got me!"

The dominance and coldness in his voice brought even more tears to my eyes.

But it was my own fault, after all I had to tell him the truth.

Why couldn't I just shut up?

"Okay, I get it!" He loosened his grip immediately, but didn't let go of my face. "I don't want to bend you, I don't want to break your will, but I have to be sure about this thing, this one thing that you obey me."

He kissed my lips as more tears rolled down my face. Unstoppable.

"Stop crying." He said softly, kissing the tears off my cheeks.

It was at that moment that I realized how difficult it would be to be with someone who had known and lived violence and had never experienced true love.

Was I even strong enough for something like that?Less than five minutes later he managed to kiss my concerns out of the world for now.

Actually, he managed to mercilessly catapult every doubt and every thought out of my mind until only one thing was present - and that was Malio.

Unfortunately, my persuasion skills weren't nearly as good as his, so he insisted on accompanying me to the exam. "You really don't have to come with me!" I tried one last time in front of the old door, which didn't exactly leave a trustworthy impression.

If the inside of the practice was half as run down as the front door appeared, my injured side was the least of my worries and I had better worry about contracting hepatitis.

"Relax, Jolien!", I heard Malio's soothing voice. At that moment I realized that I had grabbed his hand and was clutching it much too tightly. His bones were already white.

"He's really good. And I'll be by your side all the time. You don't have to be scared." I loosened my grip slightly and exhaled heavily.

To my relief, inside the house was a sterile treatment room that left no doubt that whoever was treating here might have lost their license but certainly knew what they were doing.

"Hello Malio!" It came from a small corner of the room. Only then did I notice the fat, brown-haired man sitting in front of an old PC and playing solitaire. He didn't even turn around when he greeted Malio. , "Didi, everything okay?" Malio replied with a grin.

"Didi?" I turned to him quietly. "Your loved one is my best customer!" Didi answered my question before Malio could.

"How often are you here?" I hissed in Malio's direction. "A few times." He replied with a shrug. "Not so modest! There was a time when you visited me every week. Now, however, your skills are so good that you rarely come to see me. How's your gunshot wound?" "Everything's fine." Didi sighed and turned around in the desk chair.

"What good can I do for you today?" "You should x-ray them" Didi raised an eyebrow questioningly. "Do I want to know what happened?" Malio laughed softly and raised his arms defensively: "It wasn't me - if that's what you mean."

I took turns looking at the two. There was probably something connecting you when you were examined over and over again by the same person and then patched up. A kind of familiarity was inevitable.

Didi correctly interpreted my uneasiness when the examination came up again, which was probably due to his years of experience as a doctor.

Because after he had given me a long look, he said: "Then go behind the locker room and free yourself. I don't know what connects you, but I'm asking you, Malio, to wait outside the door until she's ready." Before Malio could reply, Didi added: "No arguments, my friend. My work - mine Rules. Now get your ass out of my treatment room. hop, hop."

I stifled a giggle but couldn't quite manage it - which resulted in Malio scowling at me. "Don't laugh!" I stuck my tongue out at him and disappeared behind the makeshift locker room, which was simply a curtain mounted in a U-shape in front of a wall.

In fact, Malio left without another word and I was able to endure the procedure without his eagle eyes. Which was a lot more relaxed.

"Should I bring him back in?" Didi asked when I was already dressed and waiting impatiently for the result of the X-ray. "Is it something bad?" He shook his head. "Actually, you were lucky, young lady. It's just a bruise - which in most cases is more painful than a fracture for the first few days." I exhaled in relief.

"I can give you some painkillers so it should be bearable. It should get better over the next few days as the swelling subsides. But you will certainly have something of the large-scale hematoma for a while. "

"How long?" I whirled around when I heard Malio's voice. He leaned against the door frame and looked at Didi questioningly give me some cream." "No problem - that's not necessary!" I replied. "We'll take the cream," said Malio. "It really isn't necessary, Malio." "It is, Jolien. The Winter Ball is in three weeks." "How nice a ball, I would love to experience that again." Didi rummaged in his desk drawer and pulled out a tube.

He silently tossed them at Malio, who casually fished them out of the air with one hand. "Are you ready?" he turned to me.

Didi had already returned to his game. "Erm, see you soon," I said and Didi grunted softly. "For your sake, young lady, I hope we don't see each other again anytime soon. Don't try to let this handsome guy drag you down the abyss." Again Didi grunted at his own words and slowly it dawned on me why he probably no longer officially worked as a doctor, but only took care of the injuries of criminals by hand.

"He's crazy, isn't he?" I asked Malio when we were back in the car and he was taking a closer look at the cream. "But aren't we all a bit? Here, put this on the spot." "Now?" I looked at him in surprise. He nodded and put the tube in my hands. "I'll do that later." "No - you do it now!"

Thank goodness I had changed at the house earlier and swapped the bodysuit for a bra and panties. Which at least saved me a peep show.

I sighed and pushed up the hoodie, which I was still wearing nonetheless.

Malio eyed my bare skin and audibly sucked in air. His expression froze as he first saw the huge hematoma.

"Looks worse than it is," I said quickly - which didn't seem to have any effect on him.

"Let me do that!" he said suddenly, taking the tube from my hand, which, clumsy as I was trying to hold up the sweater and rub the area at the same time, slipped out of my hands.

I nodded and handed the tube back to him. Breathing heavily, I waited for the cold gel to touch my overheated skin.

he asked as I gasped as his hand touched my skin. "Yeah," I breathed, trying to remind myself it was just Malio and we've already been a lot had gone on.

So you could think that his gentle touch shouldn't really upset me anymore.

To my own surrogate, though, I found that I let out a small groan as his hand approached my chest, smearing a thick layer of cold money over the area.

A smile curled his lips. He stroked my side very slowly, over each individual rib cage until he reached the last one and stayed there for a moment.

I'd been holding my breath and never taking my eyes off his perfect face for a minute. The strange tension that lay between us was palpable. "You have goosebumps." He stated.

The goosebumps he had sent all over my body was the least of my problems.

Hands shaking, I lowered the hoodie, but that didn't make him lift his hand from where it still was, relentlessly pumping warmth through my entire body.

My breathing quickened. I no longer tried to fight against the enormous pull.

But to my surprise, he pulled his hand out from under his sweater just as I seriously considered getting in the back seat with him and giving in to the urge raging inside me.

I stifled the whimpering that the removal of his hand, the sudden lack of warmth, triggered in me so as not to appear completely desperate.

But as his lips curled into a meaningful smile, I knew he knew exactly what his touch had triggered in me.

And that led to not caring, so without a second thought I crawled onto his lap and unbuckled his pesky belt.

"Here?" he laughed, a dark haze covering his ice-blue eyes and he was already opening my jeans.

"Fuck me, Malio." I whispered in his ear. "Damn girl!" he breathed as we somehow managed to slip off our pants.

I heard the soft tearing of the condom packaging before he complied with my request and only seconds later I sat down on him with a groan, which made him penetrate deeply into me.

9 days later

It wasn't at all as bad with Elena as I feared at first. Her parents were very understanding and didn't ask me why I wanted to stay with them temporarily - which made them much more sympathetic.

Elena's mother, Mrs. Smith, was a short, plump woman. She almost always wore her shoulder-length, blond hair in a ponytail and her blue eyes lay behind filigree silver glasses. She worked at the local Silverside supermarket, so she was rarely home during the day.

Elena's father, Mr. Smith, was a tall, slender man with blond curls that tumbled over his face. He was a public school teacher and I wondered if he was teaching Silia every time I looked into his lovely green eyes over dinner.

At the beginning it was still difficult for me not to give in to the initial curiosity about this question, but now, 9 days later, it wasn't that difficult anymore.

In fact, I had settled in really well with them. Sure, it was still weird not waking up in my own bed, but in a room that wasn't my own, but humans were creatures of habit. I also knew that talking to a father was inevitable. I couldn't stay with Elena forever and hide from my father.

He had only received a short message from me since our argument. A sign of life that I was doing well, I couldn't do more. And him? He accepted it. Wrote me a reply just saying he was willing to talk to me if I wanted to. He would wait and give me whatever time I needed.

It wasn't easy for Elena at first either, because Malio insisted on picking us up every morning and driving us back to the Academy.

When I told her about it the first night, she gave me a look that clearly said she didn't approve, but accepted.

I had to admit that I could understand their fears and concerns, after all we were talking about Malio. Except for me, he didn't seem to tolerate anyone else, but to my own surprise, I found that he wasn't just pretending, he was genuinely nice to her.

On Friday, the day after we got to Didi's, the date of the Winter Ball was also officially on the Academy bulletin board.

December 18th. Just as Malio had prophesied.

"What are you up to today?" I heard Mr. Smith's voice snap me out of my thoughts and catapult me right back to the kitchen table where we were just sitting and having breakfast.

It was Saturday morning and I really enjoyed not being torn from my dreams by my sisters at 7:00 am. At least I could sleep in here. It was already 9:30 am when Elena and I trotted out of her room and sat down at the kitchen table with her father.

"We'll meet up with Bekka later in town!" Elena replied while pushing the margarine towards me.

Mr Smith looked up from his tablet. He sighed and put it down on the tabletop.

I knew he had probably just used up his last life in an online game and was now waiting for the five lives to refill. Mr. Smith was the polar opposite of my father. Where he hated every electronic device at the dinner table, Mr. Smith didn't care.

" Is correct. You wanted to look for dresses for the winter ball, right?", he poured hot coffee on his cold coffee, which he had completely forgotten during the game. " Elena retorted, which elicited a small giggle from me.

Because that was an understatement. I didn't know what made Bekka so upset about the ball. She only talked about it. Showed us pictures of dresses she had found on the internet during every break and changed her opinion on possible hairstyles almost every hour. We totally lost her to the Winter Ball.

"But that's nice. You will surely have a lot of fun - ", a soft ringing, announced the achievement of a new life. "- finally!", Mr. Smith was happy and reached for the tablet again.

"Do you want some more coffee?" Elena asked me after refilling her cup. I nodded and saw a new message on my phone.

MALIO: Good morning!

My heart skipped a moment. I hadn't seen Malio since yesterday afternoon and longing for him almost killed me. Crazy how you could get used to someone's closeness and warmth.

Since his father was still in Silverside and I didn't want to bring any male visitors to Elena's, our contacts were limited to the hours we spent together at school or on the cliff in his car. The place had somehow become special.

Although I made a point of taking a few minutes to answer, just letting him flounder, I managed to do just two minutes before I picked up my phone and answered him.

JOLIEN: Good morning. You don't happen to have time today and can save me from this dress purchase?

The reply came seconds later, which instantly made me grin like an idiot. Apparently he had already been waiting for my answer and hadn't even put the phone down.

MALIO: Even if I wanted to, I couldn't because I can't wait to see you in that dress.

JOLIEN: And I can't wait for you to take that dress off me!

It was much easier for me to flirt with him when his beautiful appearance didn't upset me.

MALIO: Jolien!"

Even now that I could only imagine him whispering my name with that admonishing undertone, I got very hot.

I quickly put the phone back on the table - albeit face down so I wouldn't be tempted again at not even 10am to start a dirty talk with Malio.

"Are you okay?" Elena asked as the coffee spilled over the rim of my cup as I thoughtfully poured milk into the cup.

When her father lifted his eyes from the tablet and gave me a skeptical look, I felt the heat shoot up in my cheeks. "Sorry!" I mumbled in embarrassment and rushed to the sink to get some towels from the kitchen roll so that I could clean up the flood that was slowly spreading across the entire table with a red face.

Even when Malio wasn't facing me, he still somehow managed to throw me completely off balance.

With the certainty that I'll see him again tomorrow at the latest, I wiped the table clean, threw the soaked paper in the dustbin and sat back down next to Elena at the table. Convinced that the shopping trip would be over in no time at all, I bit off a large chunk of the now-cold toast that was still on my plate.