Sinner or Healer?

Warning: Mature Content 18+

Xavier's P.O.V.

I was numb. Not because of pain but because of regret that had literally broken me today. My ego, my reputation, my anger, my revenge everything got shattered like a pack of cards. Emily's words left me speechless. She was right, not only her but Rosaline, Jennifer, Antonio and Elijah, they all have always been right and I was the one who was wrong.

The Xavier Knight who had always kept everyone at their feet, who never gave a fuck about anyone, the mighty and powerful Mafia had completely become vulnerable today. I looked at my love who was crying pathetically, her wisp of a figure trembling heavily with loud sobs. The girl who was my obsession, my madness was lying on the bed in a miserable condition.

If I wouldn't had arrived on time, God knows what would that fucker had done to my Rosebud.

The mighty Mafia King, Xavier Knight whom the entire world fears, the billionaire businessman, the biggest name in underworld, the King of the Dark world, all these tags had made me think so high of myself. These price tags made me so arrogant and cruel that I even started playing with the feelings of the person who was the only source of my happiness.

I could feel my heart tearing whenever her cries rang in my ears. I am ashamed of myself. I am feeling too guilty.

With heavy steps, I walked towards her. Tears of helplessness and remorse were escaping my eyes.

"R-Rose"

I called her but she kept crying as if she never heard me. With staggering legs, I walked to the bed and sat beside her. I grabbed her palms that were covering her face with trembling hands and removed them. Her eyes were squeezed tightly as if she was afraid of me. That mere thought made my heart heavy. I cupped her face in my palms and wiped off her tears with my thumb.

"Rosebud", I called her again. She didn't reply.

"Please baby say something. Your silence is killing me.", I cried and looked at her. Rose slowly opened her eyes; her tears were enough to squeeze my heart.

She looked at me with teary-eyes and sobbed. I couldn't take this anymore. I pulled her immediately from the bed and hugged her tightly. To my surprise, Rose also wrapped her small arms around my torso and hugged me back.

"X-Xavier, s-save me...", she whispered in a broken voice. I couldn't control my emotions anymore and burst into tears.

"I am so sorry Rosebud. I have done so much harm to you. You only gave me love and respect while I only gave you tears. You were right, if I really would have loved you, I should have approached you in the first place. I had always loved you from childhood but I waited for you to confess your feelings first. You had always cared about me, you always prioritised my wellbeing, you always kept me before you but I, I always kept my pride, my ego before you. You always craved for respect and love from me but I only gave you tears and pain. I thought I was doing right. I started thinking you as my possession, but God I was so wrong. I have always been so wrong."

I cried while holding her in my embrace. Her sobs died down slowly. I broke the hug and cupped her face. Her hazel eyes stared me innocently. I smiled sadly and pecked her nose.

"I have always taken advantage of your love, Rose. Emily is right. Your love is really pure. How many times I have hurt you but still you forgive me without giving a second thought. I kept breaking your promises and with that your soft heart but you keep forgiving me as if my wrongs never hurt you. You are so sweet, kind and pure. You are such a munificent soul. You are really an Angel, my love. I really don't deserve you.", I smiled and caressed her cheeks. Tears pooled in her hazel eyes as my words touched her heart. She raised her left palm and placed it on my cheek.

"D-Don't say like is-this.", she whispered. I shook my head and pecked her forehead.

"No baby, let me pour out my feelings today. Everyone kept advising me to not let you go. Antonio, my friend always advised me not to play with your feelings but I took everything for granted. I took your love for granted. I won't deny Rosaline that I really love you but I never understood how my love turned so dangerous and psychotic. I started becoming over possessive of you. If anyone even try to befriend you, I turned mad. I really love you Rosebud but I don't know why fear and insecurities gripped me? I thought you will leave me if you ever come to know about my real identity. That I am Mafia. You even told me that you will stay by my side forever but it was as if... my heart never believed your words. I won't lie today but the fear and insecurities which were rooted deep inside my heart always refrained me to believe you. And not only that but it compelled me to do so much harm to you.", I cried and placed my forehead on hers.

"I am sorry Rose. I don't even know how many times I have said this but today I really mean it. Please Rosaline, I beg you.", I whispered and kissed her cheek. I looked at her only to find her staring me blankly. Her eyes were gleaming with an unknown emotion which made my heart beat in trepidation.

"I know you don't believe me. So stupid of me to even think that when I have done so wrong to you? I know you hate me-"

But before I could speak further, a pair of soft lips were pressed on mine making me shut. I froze but before I could react, she detached her lips within a second and looked at me with her hooded eyes.

"I-I don't.", she replied. I looked at her and searched for truthfulness on her eyes. We kept staring each other for a few minutes in silence.

All of a sudden, a throaty chuckle escaped my lips. Rosaline frowned.

"You are saying this because you're intoxicated Rose. I don't deserve your love in fact I don't deserve anyone's love. I am your sinner but I will be your healer too.", I laughed and looked at her. She meekly shook her head in denial.

"N-No. Y-You saved me t-today. If-If you w-wouldn't had come o-on time, A-Asht-"

But before she could speak, I placed my palm on her lips. She flinched and looked at me in shock.

"Shut it. Don't ever speak his name", I growled. Her eyes turned wide. I gently removed my palms from her lips and grabbed the back of her head.

"B-But Xavier, I am really n-not a-angry on y-you", she again tried to speak but I ignored her words and made her lie down. Rosaline panicked and grabbed my wrists but I hovered over her and started caressing her hair.

"Keep quiet Rosebud, you're not in the right state of your mind right now. Don't worry I will take all your pain away.", I smiled. Her eyes turned wide as saucers. She tried to say something but I quickly pressed my lips on her soft ones and started kissing her hungrily.

End of Xavier's P.O.V.

Xavier was bogged up with regret and self-hatred. He was totally broken as he finally realized his fault today. He wanted redemption and that's what he was trying to do.

Rosaline was in pain because of him. Someone had tried to take her life; someone had tried to taint her. That mere thought was hollowing him from inside as his inner self was holding his madness only responsible for everything.

Although Rosaline was intoxicated but after watching Xavier's dejected face and glum eyes which wanted to say thousands of words to her but didn't have the courage to even face her moved her heart. She was in a daze but in her subconscious mind, she was grateful to Xavier who had saved her today from getting ruined by that psychopath. Xavier's weird behaviour and sad voice was breaking her heart. She wanted to tell him something but he wasn't even giving her a chance as he kept relishing her lips.

After kissing her passionately, Xavier left her mouth leaving Rosaline gasping for air. He immediately grabbed the sleeves of her gown and pulled them down from her shoulders.

"I will remove that fucker's touch from your body, don't worry Rosebud", he whispered and with that started planting soft kisses on her collarbone and neck. He made sure not to hurt her but Rosaline was becoming impatient. She wrapped her arms tightly around his neck and pulled him closer to herself. Xavier smiled with teary-eyes and started sucking her neck a bit roughly. Rosaline moaned in pleasure feeling his hot tongue rolling on her neck. Sparks flew all over her body as she felt him nibbling her skin. She gripped his hair and brought him closer to her face.

Rosaline frowned after watching tears sparkling in his obsidian orbs. She gently wiped them with her slender fingers and traced them all over his face. Xavier closed his eyes and rubbed his face in her soft palms which were enough to soothe his pain.

"I crushed the only flower of my garden", he whispered sadly and closed his eyes, freeing some tears from captivity. Rosaline furrowed her brows. She grabbed his face and kissed him hard.

"N-No you d-didn't. S-Stop blaming y-yourself", she replied and showered his face with feathery kisses. Xavier was losing himself slowly. Her soft touches were making him feel too elated. He immediately grabbed the strings of her gown and pulled it down to her waist.

A shuddering breath escaped her lips as she felt cold air pricking her skin like needles. Xavier then grabbed both of her bosoms in his callous hands and started squeezing them hard. Rosaline moaned loudly when she felt him playing with her soft, sensitive buds. She yelped when Xavier abruptly pinched her right bud and dug his face in her crook. He started sucking her skin roughly and at the same time fondled her breasts.

Rosaline was becoming impatient too. Her body temperature started rising up as Xavier was giving her too much pleasure. She quickly grabbed his shirt and tried to pull it up but her sudden move made Xavier halt his acts. He quickly moved away from Rosaline making her whine.

"W-What happened?", she asked him and tried to pull him closer to her. Xavier gulped watching her eyes which were filled with desire and lust. He shook his head and stood up.

"Nothing.", he gave her a curt reply and instantly ripped open his shirt. Her heart skipped a beat hearing the popping sound of buttons. She gulped watching his stocky figure. His broad clean chest, eight abs, taut muscles and well chiselled upper body left her drooling. Rosaline tried to touch him but Xavier immediately grabbed her delicate hands and tied them to the bedpost. Her eyes widened as she instantly got gripped with a strong sense of déjà ˈvu. A strangled sob escaped her lips as she started shaking her head vigorously.

"N-No, please", Rosaline whimpered but Xavier quickly cupped her face and pecked her forehead.

"Relax baby. It's necessary. I don't want to lose control that's why I did that. I am just doing my duty. I don't want to give myself pleasure. Don't worry.", he gave her a succinct reply, his gaze was icy cold.

Rosaline's heart dropped after hearing his blank tone which was devoid of any emotions. Xavier knew what she must be thinking but he ignored the pain of her eyes and stood up. He removed his belt and threw it on the floor. Rosaline flinched after hearing the clanking sound of the silver buckle as it hit the floor with a thud. Xavier again hovered over her and tried to take off her dress but stopped in midway when his gaze landed on her teary-eyes. He caressed her chubby cheek while rubbing his thumb on her bruised, cracked lips.

"I really won't hurt you. Please believe me", he tried to assure her. Rosaline shook her head in denial.

"I do. But I want you to make love to me not fuck me.", she gritted and glared him.

Rosaline's words hit Xavier like a lightning bolt. He thought that the reason behind her tears was her fear of him touching her but it came out something else.

Something which was hella hot and sexy.

His gaze instantly turned dark and his expressions hardened. He glared her and with that moved away from her. Rosaline sighed in relief but her happiness didn't last longer when she felt him removing his gown from her body.

"N-No don't do this. I don't want t-"

"Shut up. It's necessary. You will die.", Xavier cut her off harshly in midway and pulled her gown down revealing her pale legs. Rosaline started crying when she felt his hands tugging the waistband of her undies.

"N-No, don't. Not like this", she started kicking in air but Xavier had turned a deaf ear to all her cries and pleads.

Xavier was justifying her behaviour and her yearning because according to him Rosaline was drugged. But what he didn't know that Ashton did inject a drug inside her body but it wasn't that strong. After sometime, its effect started wearing off and Rosaline was by now had partially regained her senses.

No doubt she was angry at him but today his words and his acts gave her, her desires answers. When she came to know about Vincent's truth from Elijah, she lost all her hopes in love and Xavier's cold behaviour only strengthened the walls around her heart more. But when Xavier touched and made love to her the previous night, her inner voice persuaded her to change her opinions about him.

Rosaline was too angry at Xavier but after today's incident she made up her mind. She wanted to say so many things to her but Xavier wasn't giving her a chance.

Xavier removed her thong. He then hovered over Rosaline who was glaring him. Xavier could see a cloud of mixed emotions in her eyes. Anger, disappointment, lust, sadness and a tint of regret were shining in her hazel hues. Xavier heaved a deep sigh. He cupped her left cheek in his palm and caressed it softly.

"Doll, you aren't in the right state of your mind. Please don't make it hard for me. Trust me, I am really controlling myself damn too much. If I let you touch me then my inner beast will wake up which will then fuck the living daylights out of you. And I know once you will come back to your senses, you will regret everything and will hate me forever. I know I am your sinner but I just want to take all your miseries, wounds and pain away along with me. When you will open your eyes, I will be long gone away from your life. I will free you from this relationship and I mean this time. But please for now listen to me. Your Xavier is already burdened with too much regret and pain, don't give me more.", he said softly. Only he is aware how hard was for him to say those words from his mouth. He felt his soul leaving his body. He clutched her hand tightly as he feared she might slip away from his fingers.

Rosaline's jaw dropped.

Her world came crashing down.

"W-What are you-"

Xavier didn't let her complete as he slammed his lips on her and started kissing her harshly. He was disgusted with himself and wanted all this to get over as soon as possible.

Rosaline cried when he separated her legs harshly and lowered his hands to her southern region. He started rubbing her down there so as to make her wet but Rosaline instantly freed her hands away from those restraints and started pushing his shoulder.

"NO!! STOP!! I DON'T WANT THIS WAY!!", she screamed and pummelled his chest with her tiny fists. Xavier grabbed both of her wrists with his one hand and pinned them above her head while his other hard kept rubbing her nub.

"Stop it Rosebud. You will die if you don-", he whispered in a stern tone but got stopped in midway when Rosaline shouted on his face.

"Then I will prefer to die rather than losing my virginity in a disgraceful manner."

Xavier looked at Rosaline with pained expression as she quickly pushed him and got away from him. She pulled the duvet and immediately covered herself.

"Rosa, I-", Xavier tried to come closer to her but Rosaline quickly scooted away from him and shook her head.

"N-No please. Y-You are only taking actions, jumping on c-conclusions. Y-You are not even t-trying to hear me out o-once. Let me s-speak please", she cried as she clutched the sheets tightly around her naked figure.

"Rosebud, I am just trying to help you", Xavier whispered sadly as he again tried to come closer to her but she buried her face inside the sheets in fear.

"N-No. I had enough now. I don't want your help. I will let you help only if you give me a chance to speak."

Xavier huffed in frustration. He was already so pissed and now her stubborn behaviour was only getting on his nerves. He was angry at Rosaline but he didn't want to hurt her in any way. He punched the bed in anger making her jump.

"Speak.then. Don't waste my time.", he spat with clenched teeth. A lone tear fell from Rosaline's eyes as she peered at him with watery eyes.

"I don't hate you, Xavier. I really love you", she answered without stuttering once which surprised Xavier. Her voice didn't waver a bit but he still kept his face stoic.

"Alright now come here."

With that he gripped her left forearm and pulled her down on the bed.

"No, I am really in my senses. I love you Xavier", she cried as Xavier forcefully laid her down on the bed. He tried to pull her sheets that was covering her dignity but Rosaline started crying hard.

"Believe me"

"SHUT UP!!"

He growled and tore the sheets roughly making her startled. He again tried to touch her but Rosaline flinched back and started whimpering.

"No, I really love you. First tell me that you believe me then only I will allow you to touch me", she hissed in anger. Xavier harshly cupped her wobbling chin and glared in her red eyes fiercely.

"Rosaline Valentino, let me do it easily because you won't like it if I go hard on you", he growled. Rosaline didn't like the way he addressed her as Valentino. Her tears dried on their own. She slapped his hands away and glared him back.

"I am Rosaline Knight not Valentino and I am completely in my fucking senses. Xavier is my man and I only belong to him"

Xavier was taken aback. Never in a million years he had thought that Rosaline will say something like this to him. His name rolled off his tongue in such a sexy and seductive way that triggered his heart. While he was lost in a daze he didn't realise when Rosaline pulled him by his nape and crashed her lips on him.

Xavier was completely shocked and befuddled. His heart started palpitating violently. He felt tightening in his trousers when Rosaline started moving her lips against his rough ones and started sucking them. Pleasurable moans escaped her lips while sounds of soft kisses sounded like a melody in his ears.

Xavier slowly traced his right hand on the back of her head and fisted her silky locks. Rosaline yelped in pain when he gave a harsh tug on her hair and pulled them hard. She broke the kiss and looked in his hungry eyes.

"If you're in your fucking senses then let's stop this here itself. I don't want to ruin you.", he sneered on her face and started backing away from her but Rosaline was fast enough. She immediately wrapped her arms around his neck tightly and pecked her lips. She flashed him a smirk making him gulp down his drool.

"But what if I want you to ruin me?"

~~~💗~~~