Chapter 167

“If they will not fight for her, what makes you think they might fight for me?” she asked, her voice low but still laced with resentment.

“Because they believe in you. They know that you are fair and that you would never expect them to do anything without proper compensation.”

“What if I can’t? What if the reason my mother isn’t paying them is because we do not have the funds?” Was it possible the queen was just in a difficult position because of the failure of the crops in some provinces and the depletion of the mines in others?

“I don’t think that’s the case. With a proper army, we wouldn’t have to send funds across our borders. Then, you would have the money to pay them. Not to mention, I am convinced Rona is hoarding gems and other valuables.”

Kit pondered that statement for a moment. It wasn’t the first time he’d mentioned it. “I wouldn’t put it past her, but I’m not sure why.”

“I don’t know either, but if she is, the treasure is probably somewhere in the castle. We could potentially use that to change the circumstances in the provinces.”

She envisioned a warehouse full of gold and jewels and thought about how much bread and lumber that could buy. It made no sense to Kit to keep all of the riches locked up in the castle somewhere so that they could be of no use to anyone. But then, the one thing the princess did know was that there was a lot that the others were not telling her. That needed to stop.

Reaching out and brushing his hair back again, Kit scooted as close to him as she could without hurting his back. “Eli, I need to know everything that you do. If something were to happen to you—goddesses forbid—this revolution would fail because no one understands what needs to be done as well as you do.”

“I’m not exactly sure that’s true. There are others.”

“And I don’t even have the foggiest idea who you might be referring to.”

He laughed, and it was nice to hear a bit of joy in his tone despite the situation. “I think you do, Kit. Give yourself a little bit of credit.”

She found his hand with hers again and considered what she did know. Her grandmother was certainly on their side. Kit was certain her mother suspected Junno. Could she be one of the people Eli was referring to? Her mind wandered back to the night she’d heard Eli and Avinia whispering in her antechamber. Maybe the duchess was a ringleader as well. And Cassius always seemed to know just slightly more about what was going on than Kit did—maybe he knew a lot more.

Eli’s voice interrupted her thoughts. “Kit, as much as you want to hold this against your mother, you must find a way to bury that anger, for now. Believe me, over the course of the last twenty-five years, there have been plenty of times I’ve wanted to commit regicide. When the time finally comes to dethrone her, then you can draw on that anger. But for now, you cannot act upon it.”

She narrowed her eyes, hearing what he was saying but getting caught up in his disclosure that this wasn’t the first time, and she could only imagine what other atrocities he had suffered at the hand of her mother.

“Kit, promise me.” He reached up then and touched her cheek. She could tell it was painful for him just to move that little bit. How he’d ever managed to make it to the morning meal, she’d never know.

“I promise,” she finally said, taking his hand and lying it back on the bed, but not removing hers from atop it. “This time, I will not say anything. But I also swear to you, the next time she does something like this—to you or to anyone that I love—it will be the last time. I don’t care what happens to me or what I have to do to make her understand that this is not all right, but I will do it. If she’s willing to beat a Representative in the middle of a Choosing for simply winning a contest, then she’s completely out of control and beyond the scope of Yewforian law and needs to be set in her place.”

It was apparent in his eyes that Eli disagreed with her, but he also knew her well enough not to try to dissuade her. “Caution is our friend, for now, Kit. The time will come, and when it does, it will be like the waves of a stormy sea careening into a small boat and flinging it into the rocks. It will be furious and uncontainable. But if we act too quickly or without the proper momentum, the force will be more like a tide at evening fall, unmemorable, uneventful, and incapable of making any lasting impression.”

Kit nodded, understanding perfectly what he meant from his analogy. It was no wonder he was such a successful leader of men when he could use words to weave pictures and illustrate outcomes for those who may have had little ability to envision consequences on their own. Kit had no such problem—but she did have a temper, one that she would have to find a way to keep in check.

“I’m afraid I need to go. I’ve been here several hours. I wouldn’t be surprised if my mother hasn’t sent out her guard looking for me.”

“You should,” he agreed. “You probably shouldn’t have come. But I’m glad that you did.”

She leaned over and kissed his lips, difficult at that angle but still manageable, and she was glad to feel they were warm but not feverish. When she pulled back, she asked, “Shall I ask Armant to come down and change the poultice?”

“No, it’s far too dangerous for him. If your mother had any idea he isn’t completely loyal to her... he’d be gone in an instant, and he knows much and has connections everywhere in the castle. No, Bea said she would be back later to change them, as soon as she can make it here undetected.”

Bea was the same nurse who had helped with Jecob, Kit remembered. At least Eli’s back would be in capable hands. “Is there anything else I can do?”

“Keep your head about you, Kit. This is a long game, and if we show our hand too quickly, it’ll be over before it starts.”

Again, her head rocked back and forth, but convincing herself of what she should do and then actually doing it were two separate matters. She leaned over and kissed him one more time. “I love you, Eli.”

“I love you, too, Kit.”

Sliding off the bed and walking away from him was difficult, but she did have other matters to attend to, and she was certain he wanted to go back to sleep. As she walked to the door, she couldn’t hold back the tears that trailed down her cheeks. Anger and sorrow all mingled into one.

Her thoughts went to the night before, when he’d come to her in her chambers. Kit had been with many men, but making love with Eli was different. When he pressed into her, it was more than a pleasuring, more than some form of entertainment or a duty a man had to fulfill in order to make a woman happy. It was a bonding, a joining together in a way that no one else could possibly understand, and while Kit felt similarly about some of the other Representatives, no one made her feel exactly the same way that Eli did. The binding between them wasn’t something easily articulated, but the feelings he sparked in her were unique, special, worth fighting for, no matter what any outside forces might think.

She’d simply have to find a way to balance her need for vengeance with the understanding that timing was everything, and even as she walked out into the hallway, where Galter was waiting to escort her to her own chambers, Kit was frightened she’d make a mistake, one that could cost her everything.