Chapter 43

Chapter 43.

Title: The Guilt

Chapter Theme Song: Stand Still by Sabrina Claudio

[Iris’s POV]

My mind went completely blank and I felt heady as his scent surrounded me. He wasn’t merely asking me for a kiss—it was a plea to help him try and forget the horrible things that were happening. Xavier lowered his head slightly and my gaze dropped to his perfectly shaped lips. My skin tingled with anticipation as I remembered how his mouth felt when it had brushed against mine. Moving my hand from his cheek to the back of his neck, I stood on my tip toes and closed the short distance between us.

His eyes widened in shock and I felt him tense ever so slightly when I gently touched his lips with mine. Holding my position a moment longer, I savored the warmth that had washed over me. Slowly, I started to come back down onto my heels. But before I could release him and break the kiss, his arm tightened around my waist and he pulled me firmly against his chest. He angled his face slightly and began to run the tip of his tongue deliciously over the seam of my mouth. I parted my lips without a thought, granting him complete access. I shivered in pleasure as his velvety tongue explored every inch of my mouth. He tasted like fifty year old brandy. It was the kind of liquor that was known to warm a person right down to their toes in the dead of winter. The sweet gentle kiss that I had started just mere seconds ago was turning into an all consuming fit of passion.

Heat poured between my legs and I sighed against his lips. Xavier moved his mouth and began to trail kisses down my neck. I moaned softly as he worked his way back up to my mouth. This was insane! Somewhere in the recesses of my brain, I thought that I should probably stop making out with the president of the fucking nation. However, as he softly murmured my name before going in for another kiss, I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. His hands moved from my hips down to the curve of my bottom and he pressed me against the evidence of his desire. I felt my breathing hitch as I lightly pushed against his chest. I needed to breathe! He groaned slightly in protest. I smiled as I kissed his cheek.

“Just for a moment, please.”

He set me down and held me as I gathered myself. I took one more deep breath before I moved my hands to unbutton his shirt. A surprise gasp came from my mouth as I felt his head hit my shoulder. Uh, what?

“Mr. President?”

I gently shook his shoulder. When he didn’t answer, I patted his arm while a little louder this time, I asked, “Mr. President?”

He snored. Fuck! I knew it! He drank too much. Taking a deep breath, I looked down at his face. He was absolutely spent. Dragging him over to the sofa, I tried to put him down as carefully as I could. After removing his shoes, I draped his coat over his chest. The door creaked open and I looked over my shoulder to see Daniel standing in the doorway. Quietly, I walked over to him and soundlessly shut the door behind me as I followed him out into the hallway. Daniel slumped against the wall and let out a ragged breath.

“I finally got everything under control, but just for now. Tomorrow we have to hold a press conference to release an official statement. Let him know once he wakes up.”

Daniel started to say something else, but stopped as he studied me for a minute with a perplexed look on his face.

In a curious tone, he asked, “Miss Young, what happened to your lipstick? I thought you had worn a darker shade this afternoon?”

Staving off the urge to die of embarrassment, I quickly changed the subject. “Did you find any leads of who could have been responsible for the fire?”

His brows rose in question and then he shook his head. “Not yet. However, we do have footage of an unknown janitor entering the building to collect the afternoon garbage.”

I froze. “Can… Could I see that footage, Daniel? It would be good for me to watch out for him as well.”

Looking down at his watch, Daniel yawned and rubbed his face roughly with his hands. “Sure, Xavier should have a copy on his laptop. I better to go. I have a billion other things to do before the press conference and I need to finish them up before I faint from exhaustion.”

“Sure, Daniel. Try to get some rest soon.”

He nodded and I watched him with a sympathetic smile as he trudged back to his office. I turned and went back to check on the president. He was still out cold. I adjusted his coat and then walked over to the desk. The laptop was still on from when he had been working on something earlier. It was only a couple of more weeks until the election so he had been pushing himself harder than usual. Sighing, I flopped into his chair. I didn’t even have to look for the footage as he had already been watching it.

I cursed under my breath as I studied the blurry footage. When the janitor came into view, I stopped the video and enlarged the picture. Squinting in concentration, I looked the man over. There wasn’t anything spectacular about him. Brown hair, medium height and build, but what was that on his forearm? I enlarged the picture a bit more. My heart thudded in my chest and I shot out of the chair.

As I quickly made my way out of the building, my breathing became unsteady. I replayed the image of the janitor’s tattoo in my head. I knew that symbol all too well. The cold air hit my face as I reached the parking garage. After scanning the area to make sure that I was alone, I walked over to a secluded spot and pulled my phone out of my pocket. My hands were shaking with rage as I waited for him to answer my call. The lazy drawl that seeped through the receiver grated against my nerves and I balled my hand into a fist as I heard him complain about the late hour.

“Shut the fuck up and meet me in our usual place in an hour!” I yelled.

Disconnecting the call, I looked toward the building. I knew that I shouldn’t leave Xavier alone—especially in his current condition—but I had to know. Under normal circumstances, I bragged that I was a fairly leveled headed person and never made irrational decisions. But as I watched Xavier blame himself for everything that had happened something within me cracked. I wasn’t going to let this go. Breaking into a nearby car, I quickly hotwired it to start. The engine roared to life and I sped out of the lot.

About an hour and a half later, I arrived on the outskirts of Silverstone City. Parking in the public lot, I got out and dusted the license plate with dirt. Hopefully, no one would come looking for it any time soon. After taking a quick glance up and down the road, I walked across the street to the small park. It had been here for years and not a lot of people were even aware of its existence since the entrance was ensconced with thick pine trees. However, if someone walked toward the back of the park, there was a pretty big clearing with a small pond. My brother and I had found this place when we were kids and it had become our meeting place for when we found ourselves in emergency situations. I sat on my normal bench and wait for him to show up.

The crisp wind whirled through the trees, making the air smell like sweet pine. I had always loved this place. It was one of the few places where I had felt truly safe. After a few minutes, the wind started to pick up and I heard a helicopter approaching. That damned man. I thought he would at least try and practice subtlety. But no, Artemis Harrison always had to make a flashy appearance. Rolling my eyes, I stood up and watched him descend from the chopper in one smooth jump. Walking towards me, his black hair whipped around frantically as the chopper left. Dressed in his usual cargo shorts and t-shirt, I couldn’t help but shiver a little. Didn’t he ever get cold? He smirked at me as if he could read my thoughts. Breaking out into a run, he all but tackled me as he gave me a huge hug.

“Sista! I have missed you so so much! But, ummm… why did we have to meet here?” he asked as he looked around with a grimace.

Being a computer nerd, I guess he didn’t like getting outside as much anymore. Not that he had ever really enjoyed it when we were kids, but his question and tone nettled me.

Frowning, I wrenched myself out of his arms and replied, “You must have known it was pretty important if I called you to meet me here.”

He looked equally irritated. “Of course I knew that! But, you could have just messaged me. I had to end a game early because of this… meeting. Do you know how many people are mad at me because I had to abandon the game early?”

I rubbed my temples while telling myself, Hold it in, Iris.

Artemis was a computer geek, but was a force of freaking nature. We had trained together and on our first mission he had all but taken out a whole gang by himself. Someone from the group had interrupted his conversation with a cute girl and he got angry. I inhaled a deep breath. No one from our “family” was normal. Shaking off the memories, I looked up at Artemis and crossed my arms.

“Artemis, you have to tell me. Was it Wolf? Did he order the fire on Xavier Gray’s project?”

He blinked and just stared at me for a moment. Then he shrugged and said, “I really have no clue, Sista. No one talks to me about Wolf’s plans except when they need something. Do you suspect that he had something to do with it? It doesn’t seem like something—”

“I saw Ricky in the footage that was recovered. The tattoo on his forearm was as clear as day,” I interrupted.

I felt tears prick my eyes as I thought about all the families that had suffered from the fire. Artemis looked stunned for a moment and then his eyes widened in realization.

“You are probably right. I did overhear a conversation between Wolf and Ricky at headquarters the other day. They were discussing something about a furnace… I didn’t think anything of it at the time.”

Silence surrounded us and I felt my nails dig into the palm of my hands. It was Wolf. It was me. I started shaking as hot tears slipped down my cheeks.

“How?” I asked. I didn’t even recognize my voice. It came out harsh and ragged. “How could he do that? Did you know that a child was killed in that fire?” My face scrunched in fury as I stared up at him and continued, “If… if it wasn't because of me none of this would have happened! I should have never sent him those documents.”

I took a deep breath as I rubbed my face with my hands. “Artemis, more than twenty families have lost their homes and some of them are seriously injured. Everyone is blaming President Gray, who is only guilty of trying to improve the living conditions in that area.” Grabbing Artemis by the arm, I yelled, “Call Wolf now! I have to know why he did this!”

He placed his hand gently on my shoulder, trying to comfort me. Looking at me intently, as if he was thinking hard about something, then he said slowly, “Calm down, Iris. We can’t question Wolf's decisions. You should just focus on carrying out your orders. You know what will happen if you go against him.”

“I don't fucking care what he will do to me! Families have been hurt and Xavier Gray’s entire party is on the brink of turning their backs on him because of this incident. How can you ask me to calm down when I am to blame for an innocent child's death? Don’t you understand? It’s my fault!”

Lowering his eyes, he let out a deep sigh. “Iris, you… you care about Xavier Gray a lot, don’t you?”

I froze as another tear of frustration fell onto my cheek. He swore viciously under his breath as he took a step back. Swallowing hard, I gathered myself and said, “N-no. It’s just those people were innocent and now their lives will never be the same because of my choices.”

Smiling slightly, Artemis shoved his hands into his pockets and said, “I suggest you stay away from whatever Wolf has planned, Sista. You know that I am always here for you. But, you know that no one can reason with Wolf when he has his mind set on something. His hatred from Xavier Gray runs deep and he won’t hesitate to get rid of anyone that gets in his way.” He shrugged as he continued, “Just thought I should remind you.”

Turning to walk away, he threw me a quick glance over his shoulder. “You should also remember that you have a fiancée. Act accordingly.”

He left me standing there, staring at his back as he walked away. I sunk to my knees as I buried my face into my hands feeling utterly alone.