Chapter 22
Nandani waited, not sure where he was going with this. But at least he had started talking.
"Besides, you know most of my truths already. I cannot seem to say no, where you are concerned, Nandani." He said it almost under his breath like he was trying to make up his mind about something.
Manik took a step toward Nandani so they were only a few feet apart. Her head tilted back to keep eye contact. "Which truth do you want, Nandani. The truth about rehab?" His eyes bored into her with a passion and a vulnerability she had not seen in him before.
"I never went to rehab, Nandani. My Dad had a gambling problem. By the time I found out, he had lost half of my parent's savings. So, I told him I wanted to go on a father-son road trip, and instead, I drove him straight to a clinic. I had shocked the hell out of him, but he checked himself in for the week. The joke was on me when Dad's credit card company called home and told my mom the clinic charge put his card over the limit. When she called my Dad to figure out what the hell was going on, he was filling out paperwork and I answered," Manik said.
He stopped to drag a breath in. "I did the first thing I could think of. I told her it was me, that Dad was checking me in for drug addiction. My reputation was already tarnished at best, so it was easier that way. It was not right to stand by and let it ruin his career, or our family. I convinced Dad never to tell Mom the truth."
"That is what happened that summer. That is when things changed for me when I turned things around. I have no idea how the rumor spread, Nandani."
Nandani was stunned silent. For minutes she just looked at him, but he had clearly said all he was going to and waited with that look on his face. There were a million things she wanted to ask but could not. It was like a giant puzzle that had fallen into place. Between taking care of his Dad and having to get a scholarship to pay tuition, it made sense why he had fallen off the grid for a while. Why he had gone to Houston for a year. Why he was still trying to find himself now, and rebuild his identity and everything around him piece by piece.
All of the accusations Nandani had been building up evaporated.
Manik was a good guy. The kind of guy she did not even know existed anymore. The quiet echoed around them. She could feel her fists clench and unclench, not sure of where to release their energy now that there was no target, no one who deserved them.
His eyes were serious. The front hall was dark, and the only light falling in from the window, casting long shadows across his face. His voice cut the darkness softly once more. "Nobody knows except for me and my Dad. We kept it hidden from everyone. Including my Mom and Mukti. So please don't tell."
"Manik..." Nandani took a step toward him, wanting somehow to comfort him. The boy he had been, was forced to step up and be the man of the house. Keeping up the illusion for the benefit of his family.
"Don't, Nandani." His voice was a warning. "Don't look at me like I am some kind of saint."
"No? Because you kind of look like it from where I am standing," she said.
He let out a humorless laugh. "I am not even close." Manik took a step forward, nearly closing the distance between them. It was meant to be threatening, but Nandani was not afraid. She had to tilt her head back to keep their gazes locked.
"While we are talking truth, what if I told you that ever since that first night at the party I cannot get you out of my head? That from the moment I kissed you, I wanted to do a thousand things I have only imagined to you? All the while you were practically crying over some other guy, Nandani." Manik said it forcefully, with a dark undercurrent like he had been torturing himself with the guilt for weeks and the wounds were still raw.
Suddenly Nandani was not sure why she had come. Was it for an apology? To tell him to get lost? To have him make stupid jokes and help her ignore the feeling that her world was spinning out of control? He had blown away all of it with his words.
Then through the chaos, the answer came to her, clear as anything she had ever known. It was not what she had expected but somehow it was right.
When she started again her voice was steadier than she would have thought possible. "Manik. Do you remember what you said the night I came over? About wanting me to show you?"
Confusion mixed with the dark expression on his face for a moment. Then something clicked into place. "Yeah." Manik's gaze was intent on her.
"Did you mean it?" It was like someone had hijacked her brain and her mouth.
Something flared in his eyes. She would have given a thousand dollars at that moment to know what he was thinking. Was he thinking she was crazy? That this had come out of the blue? That he had been waiting for this?
"Nandani, we don't have to..." he started, taking a step back. Nandani realized she had basically proposed to him in his front hall after storming his house and accusing him of all kinds of things. All at 1:00 am, on a weekday.
"Forget it. This was a bad idea." Her head spinning, her face flushed, she turned to leave.
His voice stopped her even before his fingertips brushed her arm.
"Hey, smart girl. I am pretty sure that is my line," Manik said.
Nandani turned back slowly to face him and his hand fell back to his side. The barest upward curve graced his perfect mouth, but it faded quickly. Manik's eyes shone in the darkness as they searched her face. "You can show me anything you want, Nandani."
He might as well have said please stay because that is what it sounded like to her ears.
With agonizing slowness, she reached out and laced his fingers in hers, as he had at the game. This time she did not feel guilty for enjoying the way his hand fit with her's.
Manik then turned and led her up the stairs. The house was silent and dark except for the muffled sound of their feet on the carpet. Manik's room was the same as it had been when she was last there. Maybe there were fewer books on the bed. The piles of clothes had been moved away.
Her eyes adjusted to the darkness and her brain was soaking up everything no matter how insignificant.
Manik crossed to the bed and turned to face her. His moments reminded her of the jungle cats she had seen at the zoo when she was little. He was slow, smooth, and deceptively casual.
Manik sat on the edge of the bed, his head tilted up toward her. His fingers were still linked loosely with hers as if he was reluctant to let her go. In case she ran away?
Nandani was not the one to run away from her problems. She did not use sex, or alcohol, or drugs to numb when things ached inside. Sure, the exams and her mom had pushed her over the edge, but that had only been her excuse to get here. Anything from this point forward was on her own steam.
She wanted to think about tonight, and not tomorrow or three months from now or three years from that. She wanted not to worry about what the next breath she took might mean for Mukti, or their investors, or her mom. She wanted one night with this perfectly messed-up guy who wanted her back the same way.












