###Chapter 107 Jordan Astley Actually Cares About You

She sighed. "When you're here in Jordan's house, we look at the both of you and think about how you two have been together for a long time already. How much better he would be if you influenced him? But now that you two have come this far, you should just continue and go on!"

I knew Marcela was well-intentioned. I patted her hand and said, "Marcela, the most difficult thing for a person to do is trying to change someone. I won't change Jordan, nor can I change him. It's probably fate. I'll try my best to control myself in the future. I won't quarrel with him. Don't worry!"

Her eyes were a little red, and she shook her head slightly. "You young people, you must remember to cherish these days you have together. When you get old and you look back, you will find out that the people who could have been with you have not done their best yet. You'll realize that the people who could have loved you sweetly are the ones you let go halfway. When you're all done with your youth, you will all have regrets. Regret is normal in life, but if they are regrets with people you love, they will be hurtful."

I nodded and I couldn't figure out how to respond to what she just said. There was not such a big gap between Jordan and me.

Most of our fights were about small and inconspicuous things, but these little things have piled up together. I couldn't just forget all of our quarrels. I couldn't explain everything clearly as well to her. I have so much resentment in my heart that I couldn't just let it go.

"Thank you, Marcela!" I could see clearly that between me and Jordan, she just wanted us to have a good life. She was only saying this all out of good intentions.

Seeing that I couldn't seem to listen to her, she said, "You child, you are so stubborn!"

I laughed and nodded again and again, "I know! I know you are right!"

Seeing me like this, she paused and said, "Ivelle, don't feel like your husband doesn't have you in his heart. Yesterday, when he came back, he asked where you were going several times. When you changed your phone, he thought you were gone and was too anxious to inquire about you. He knew that you went to Greenville, and he was determined to find you all night. You know, he just came out of the ward, and his scars are not yet clean. He needs a good rest. Dr. Silverman was afraid that something would happen to him, so he was stopped. Also, he went out early this morning and waited for you."

After a pause, she sighed and said helplessly, "I look at this gentleman and his eyes are full of love for you, and so are yours. I clearly care very much in my heart. How come neither of you is willing to live a good life?"

"Marcela, did you cook something downstairs?" I opened my mouth and interrupted her.

She stopped talking, smelled it, was distressed. She got up and said, "Oh, the beef spareribs soup I made for my husband!"

With that, he hurried downstairs.

I sat in the chair beside me and watched her bring some more chicken soup. I grew up very shallow, so the love I saw was also shallow.

I haven't felt family affection for many years now, let alone romantic love. I couldn't love, and I haven't learned how others love me.

Grandma adopted me. In those few years, she let me know what care and warmth are. I understood her actions as love.

Liam's extreme indifference, stubbornness and cold eyes, I perceived all of it as paranoia.

Maisie's guardianship and protections, I perceived as genuine friendship.

And Jordan, in the past two years, he treated me well. He really did not dare to hurt me. But he still did not do anything to make me feel loved.

Mistaking his actions as indifference was not my original intention when I got married to him.

I liked Jordan, that's why I could put up with him even though we treat each other coldly. This did not mean that I could pretend to be stupid and regard his cheap kindness as love!

The night was getting deeper and I was really tired, but I couldn't fall asleep after lying in bed for a long time. I got used to sleeping with Maisie a few days ago.

At this time, lying alone on the big bed, I felt so empty that I grew anxious. The wind outside the window was very loud, and the rain in the middle of summer came quickly and aggressively.

As several gusts of wind roared past, the torrential rain came one after another.

I couldn't fall asleep. I looked at the clock on the wall and it was already one o'clock in the morning. I was still so upset that I stood on the balcony in my pajamas.

The last time I got wet in the rain on the balcony, Jordan made sure to renovate the balcony. He assured me that rainwater would not be able to come in anymore, and all I could feel was the chilly wind.

I was so upset and my heart felt heavy. I went straight downstairs and into the yard.

The courtyard of the villa was gardened by Marcela alone. There were a lot of flowers and bushes everywhere. At that moment, another heavy downpour fell, beating these flowers askew, looking very appropriate to my situation.

I couldn't help feeling a bit like these flowers and plants. As I was walking into the yard, I also felt the heavy, pouring rain.

My pajamas were thin and were soon drenched with rain. The rain was not cold, so it felt a little pleasant. Still, I couldn't help feeling uncomfortable. I squatted in the yard and wept silently.

People always have to vent. I just took advantage of this rainy day to cry.

When Marcela found me, I was crying bitterly. She was holding an umbrella, panicking, as she tried to pull me up, but she was old after all. She couldn't help me if I didn't stand by myself.

Helplessly, she threw her umbrella and ran to the hall. When she came out, she took a raincoat in her hand and comforted me and said, "Ivelle, you can't do this to yourself. If you don't feel sorry for yourself, you should also feel sorry for the child in your belly. What can you do if something bad happens to your child?"

How could I listen to anything? While squatting on the ground, I just felt like crying. I wish I could vent all my grievances.

Although the summer rain was not cold, I was still a pregnant woman, squatting in the rain for about an hour. I felt my body shaking after a short while.

I was so dizzy for a moment.

I heard Marcela's surprised voice through my hazy ears. She shouted, "Sir, you're back!"

I couldn't help but look back and see the gate. Jordan was dressed in a black suit and his eyes came towards me with cool and angry look.

He picked me up and went inside the villa.

He kept a calm face, and my eyes felt a little tired after crying for a long time. I didn't want to see him, so I just closed my eyes.

When Marcela saw that Jordan was attending to me, she did not come up to interfere anymore.

As soon as the bedroom door closed, Jordan tore off my clothes and carried me into the bathroom.

As long as he didn't open his mouth, I also didn't say a word. The air inside was dreadfully quiet.

As time went by, my frozen body regained its warmth, and my sore eyes improved a little bit.

Slightly opening it, I saw Jordan's face gloomy looking at me for a long time. His eyes were deep and cold and his thin lips gently opened. "Self-abuse? You find that fun?"

I frowned and lay naked in the bath as he watched me. It was so awkward that I got up and got ready to go out of the bathroom.

He pressed my back on the tub and said, "Lie down!"

I frowned and turned cold. "I want to rest!"

"Oh, are you going to sleep outside?" Holding me under the water, he looked very pale. "Why did you run out in the rain?"

I pulled the bath towel, put it on my body, and casually said, "I'm in a bad mood!"

"In a bad mood?" He sneered. "Everyone in bad mood who hurts themselves like you turn into corpses in the street. Ivelle, are you torturing yourself or are you torturing me?"