Chapter-31

Author's pov

" Don't be scared, ok. Take Almighty's name before starting to write," Maryam advised Omaira while braiding her hair.

Yamir said sounding extremely nervous," Mamma, what if I bring poor marks again. Baba will scold me a lot."

" Why would you bring poor marks, hmm? Didn't I teach you properly? Just don't be nervous. You will do good this time," Maryam assured forcing a smile on her face.

It was almost 9 a.m and Maryam was getting the kids ready for school. The kids have an exam today, that's why both of them are nervous. They were requesting their mother to not take them to the exam hall.

A few days passed after Maryam's last encounter with her parents. Since then she didn't receive their call again. Yardan was behaving civilly with her after that night. Maryam doesn't care how he is behaving since her mind is still stuck with her lost child. A few times she thought to leave everything and go wherever her two eyes go but looking at Yamir & Omaira's faces she remained silent. She felt like Mehzabin will be disappointed if she leaves Yamir & Omaira.

" Mamma will be back after wearing the abaya. Just wait for a few moments," Saying that she forwarded her legs when Yardan entered the room.

Yardan said loudly," I will tell the driver to drop the kids in the school. You stay at home."

Turning behind Maryam looked at him with questioning eyes. She frowned her brows confusingly seeing him approaching her.

" Stay at home with me. You haven't recovered yet. You need some proper rest," he told sounding concerned and then caressed her cheeks.

Maryam wasn't in the state to argue so she just nodded her head. She didn't question him nor she even shows any emotions. She knew why is he telling her to stay. To have sex with her. For the last few days, he didn't even touch her. She realized he was getting bored without touching her. She was way to lost to understand the genuine concern in his voice.

" Ok," she replied shortly.

Waving Yamir's hands through the car window, he said loudly," Bye Mamma. Bye, Baba."

" Ummah, Mamma," Omaira gave a flying kiss to Maryam.

Maryam said waving her hands," Don't be nervous. Love you."

When the kids left for school Maryam shared a blank look with Yardan. Before he could say anything she forwarded her legs to her bedroom. Yardan also followed her silently.

Hearing footsteps approaching her she started opening her clothes and looking outside through the window. She will just get naked when Yardan held her hands from behind. She turned her face at him with questioning eyes.

" Wear your clothes," He ordered but she kept standing like a statue.

Sighing slightly he buttoned her tops and held her shoulder. Sitting on the bed he gestured her to sit beside him which she obliged silently. She didn't ask him anything because she doesn't even want to know the reason behind his changed behaviour.

Yardan stared at her for a good few seconds. She was looking so lost like her body is only here. Her eyes were void, prominent dark circles can be noticed under her eyes. Her face was pale, her hair was messy and her lips were dry. She was looking like a living corpse.

" Umm.......I talked with your younger sister yesterday. She told me that you like playing chess," He asked breaking the silence.

The word chess triggered some memories inside Maryam. She used to play chess with Mikaeel a lot. It was her favourite game and he was her favourite opponent. Every time it would be her who won the game. But, in the game of life, she lost.

Her straight eyes started moving and slowly she looked at Yardan. His eyes were soft, full of concern and they were staring right into her eyes. She wasn't understanding that he was trying to be normal with her. He was trying to make her normal. But, he doesn't know that it was late already.

" You want to play? Why?" She asked.

He answered," What do you mean why? I just wanted to spend some time with you."

Maryam blinked her eyes because she wasn't understanding him at all. He wants to spend time with her! Why? It's been years since they got married, he never wanted to spend time with her. Then, what changed now? Isn't she still the murderer of her sister? Doesn't he hate her?

" No," Maryam answered shortly.

His face hardened for a few seconds by her rejection. But, considering her emotional state he controlled himself from spitting something awful.

" Then, let's go outside. Let's go for lunch. After that, I will take you to aqu..............." He was interrupted by her.

She said meekly," I am ok here. I don't want to go anywhere."

Saying that she tried to stand up but he held her wrist tightly. With a sudden pull, he threw her on the bed and hovered over her. Grabbing her jaw tightly he made her look into his eyes.

" I am trying to be normal with you. I am trying to cheer you up but you continued showing me attitude. Why is that, huh?" He shouted at her face making her tremble.

She shot back with the same intensity," You don't have to cheer me up. I don't need anyone. I just want to live alone. What will happen if you try to act normal with me? Does it even matter? You don't love me nor you let me love you. There is nothing between us. So, please don't show me your concern. Your concern and trying won't bring back my children."

He was speechless after hearing her. Her eyes brimmed with tears but she didn't let the tears soak her cheeks. He opened his mouth to say something but didn't understand what he should say. He was feeling disturbed. He never cared for her. Her tears meant nothing to him but suddenly he was feeling guilty. For what? He doesn't know.

Since the day he got to know that Maryam was a result of an affair he was feeling sorry. The way her mother described her feelings for Maryam was itching him a lot. Somewhat he was feeling sorry for her. The mother she loves so much and can even do anything for her has zero love and affection for this poor woman.

" You married me for your children. I am taking proper care of them. I am a substitute for my sister. Aren't you satisfied with my services yet? What more do you want from me? I have nothing to give you anymore," Saying all this she went to her favourite place.

The window where she sits every day and looks outside with void eyes. Yardan didn't disturb her again. Having no other choices he decided to leave her alone.

The next day

" Why aren't you picking up our calls, huh? What do you think of yourself?" Maryam's father shouted over the phone.

Maryam answered angrily," I don't think anything. What do you think about me, huh? Except for a money laundering machine, what do you think of me?"

Maryam decided that she won't pick up her family's calls again but in front of their continuous calling she decided to receive the call and tell them that now she has zero empathy for them.

" Why are you silent, Abbu? Do you need another bucket of money? If yes, then earn it or tell your useless sons to earn it. I am tired of earning money by spreading my legs in front of that buddha(old man). According to you, you guys married me off to him but in reality, you sold me to him like a commodity. Now, I am just a whore of him," She screamed at the top of her lungs. Her words stunned Abdullah.

He asked with a shaky voice," What kind of words you are taking, huh? I am your father."

" Oh, Allah!! You remember that! I thought I have to remind you that I am your daughter," Maryam mocked laughing.

Abdullah tried to manipulate her emotionally," I can understand that you are angry with me and your mother. I know that you are angry with your mother's behaviour that day. You need to understand tha.................."

Maryam couldn't hear what her father said further because someone snatched the phone from her hand. When she looked behind it was none other than Yardan.

" If you need money then learn to talk to my wife with respect. Otherwise, don't call again," Saying that he cut the call and threw the phone on the bed.

Maryam heard him but didn't say anything. She doesn't even care what he says or does now. Her mind doesn't let her think anything at all except for Mikaeel. She was just missing him terribly.

" How are you feeling now?" He asked trying to start a conversation.

Maryam didn't bother to reply. Without giving a single glance at him, she went to the balcony and sat on the easy chair. Pulling her knees close to her chest she rested her face there.

" I am trying to talk to you but you are ignoring me only. Why is that, huh?" Yardan's loud voice echoed through the whole area but Maryam didn't even blink her eyes.

Tapping her shoulder he shouted," I am talking to you."

Feeling his hand on her shoulder she closed her eyes. Fisting her palms she let out some heavy breathing. She couldn't tolerate his loud voice anymore and stood up angrily.

Without thinking anything further she raised her hand in the air and slapped right across his face. The impact was so hard that her five fingers printed on his cheek instantly. Touching his throbbing cheek he looked at her in disbelief.

" I hope you got my answer," She said shaking with fury.