Thumping heart

“I felt that if he touched me, I'd die. And then the thought crawled into my brain that if he didn't touch me, I'd die.” -Kitty Thomas, The Auction

Five years ago…

As the days were passing by, the wedding date was coming closer as now there was only a week left for our wedding. Both families went to the lake house where the wedding was supposed to happen. The wedding planners have already started their work.

Last month was the best month of my life, I had the chance to spend my time with Ethan Forbes, he was really a charmer. I remember the day when he was narrating his funny experiences and I kept splitting in loud laughs. He had taken me to watch a new release and also introduced me to his co-stars and after that, we had dinner in a restaurant. Throughout the dinner, my phone screen kept flashing with the calls from Xavier's number. Well, I totally ignored him after our engagement. I thought we could work out, but he wasn't made for me, and I didn't want to ruin my future with him.

"Evelyn… Miss Evelyn?" Someone called, breaking the chain of my thoughts. Looking towards the source, I saw the same tall brunette who was irking me with her different questions regarding the decoration.

"Yea?" I asked.

"Which flower arrangement would you like? Rose, Lily or Orchid?" Asked the brunette.

"Rose." I said, showing her my fake smile.

"Okay, so what kind-"

She was saying something, but I didn't listen. My eyes zoomed on the tall handsome figure that was entering through the huge entrance. This was the first time I was seeing Ethan after our almost kiss and his face brought back all the memories, making my heart go haywire inside my chest.

Remembering the night when he was dropping me at home, I was about to exit his car when he suddenly got a hold on my bare arm. Gasping, I faced him and found him staring at my face with dilated pupils. My breath hitched at the intensity in his eyes and a shiver ran down my spine.

"Ethan." I whispered when he stepped towards me, his delicious scent teasing my senses.

"Evelyn." He whispered back, his deep voice reverberating through my being.

My heart was thumping because of his proximity, he kept leaning towards me, butterflies erupted in my chest when he pressed his body to mine. He was about to erase the distance between us, when my phone burst out into a saccade string of ringtone and Ethan groaned. When I looked at my phone, it was Xavier who called. Grabbing the opportunity, I ran out of his car as the awkwardness grew between us and I was capable enough to face it.

"Evelyn!" Someone yelled.

Damn! I zoned out again.

When I looked at the owner of the voice that just yelled at me, I saw Ethan standing in front of me, wearing his signature smirk on his lips.

"Sorry," I said, "What were you saying?"

"I was asking, do you have a minute?" He asked.

After contemplating for two seconds, I nodded my head and followed him, wherever he was taking me. Following him inside the room, I found him stripping off his shirt. My eyes took in every inch of his ripped, muscular body and an urge to trace his abs with my fingers erupted inside my heart.

"Like what you see?" Asked Ethan, stepping closer to me.

"You wanted to talk?" I asked, ignoring the eruption of feelings for him.

"I wanted to finish what we have started…" he put his arms on my sides, caging me in. His intense gaze kept me frozen in my place. My stomach tightened in knots, and I let out a deep breath.

"What are you talking about?" I mumbled under my breath.

He snaked his arm around my waist, pulling me towards him. Butterflies erupted in my stomach when his lips landed on mine, the softness made my heart burst out of my chest. My knees felt weak under my weight.

Ethan deepened the kiss, tracing every nook and corner of my mouth, his hands left my waist and moved downwards, towards my butt until he cupped it gently and gave a squeeze. A moan left my mouth as I felt something which I haven't felt before. By the time we parted, both of us were panting hard. His grey eyes were hooded, and his mouth was slightly parted.

"Ethan," I mumbled as tears gathered in the back of my eyes. "I'm getting married to your best friend."

He pulled apart for a moment and stared into my eyes with his grey ones. "You don't have to marry him, Evelyn. He is not worthy of you. Look at you, fine and radiant, do you see yourself with someone like him?" Saying, he leaned down to capture my lips again, his hand caressing the side of my cheek.

Cutting the kiss again, by placing my hand between our mouths. "I need to get married to him, no matter what I want, otherwise my family will lose the shares." I spoke.

"It's not your job to sacrifice your life for your family." He gritted through clenched jaw.

Making some distance between us, "I need to do this, Ethan." I said, snorting and he pulled away from me.

"You still have a week to think, love." Said Ethan, picking up the towel as he then went into the shower, leaving me in his room all alone with a deadline while I sat down on the bed, dreading my wedding with the person who could never make me feel like Ethan.

Tears welled up inside my eyes, again at his departure.

Everything about him felt good at the moment, then why were warm tears rolling down my cheeks? Why was a part of me cursing me throughout? Why did I hate my selfish, shallow hits at that moment? Just why?