19

Iris Parker

I knew this was gonna happen, but I didn't expect it to be this bad.

"Mommy, where's daddy?" Jamie asked again. I breathed in deeply and turned towards him. The other two looked towards me for my answer.

I probably answered this a thousand times since we arrived here a week ago and I was getting tired of it, but I needed to suck it up. This was a choice I made.

"I already told you, honey. We won't be seeing him for a while. Besides, we're with grandpa now. Aren't you happy?" I ask, trying to change the subject, trying to make them feel bad about asking. It was evil, but I had no more options.

They just kept asking and I was... tired of answering.

"We're happy..." Jacob started, fiddling with his fingers and looked to his siblings for help.

"But we want to see daddy." Jace said finally with a pouty lips, a sign that soon, his tears were going to fall.

I felt a warm tugging in my chest as they said these things. Why is this so hard?

"I understand, but we have to be away for a while alright? What about we go see aunt Haley and Gaby? It's been a while since we've last seen them." I question for another time. I reach my hand out to Jacob's cheek as I waited for a response, but all he did was stare at me and I knew that he wasn't happy with the way things were.

I turned around and started cleaning the things I used to cook as the triplets ate quietly behind me.

It's okay... It's hard now, but soon they'll get used to him not being here. Just like before. It'll be just the four of us.

We'll be happy again.

-----

I was watching the triplets and Gaby play at the playground as I waited for Haley to come back. For a moment, I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly.

This past week had been a rollercoaster as we try to adjust in a new place again. I was happy to be back home, but I was still worried for the three. I couldn't do anything but feel sorry for them. I just want them to have a normal life.

I was suddenly snapped from my thoughts when someone put a bottle of water in front of me. It was Haley. My lips immediately formed a smile as I looked towards her.

"You don't look stressed at all." she starts sarcastically and sits beside me.

I laughed softly and shook my head.

"You know Haley... Lately, I don't know if I've been making the right choices. All the logical reasons say that these are the best choices, but why do they feel so wrong?" Haley's hand held mine, comforting me.

She smiled at me and then she looked up to look at kids playing.

"Iris, Iris. I really don't know what to say. I think you already know the answer to your questions."

"But, Haley. I don't know if I can forget. I tried, I try. And I'm afraid that I will only use the past to hurt him, me, and especially them." I say and look towards the triplets.

After I said that, she rolled her eyes at me as if I was some whiny brat, which I probably was anyways.

"Look, hun. Everything now is up to you. I'm not telling you to go back to him, pretend everything is okay and voilà, a perfect family. It doesn't work like that. Did you really give him a chance? Or did you just try to pretend like your problems didn't exist and that's what ate you up inside? Did you go back to the past every time he tried to make it work? Forgiving is a process, dear. You will not forget, sure, but at least you'll forgive." Haley said lengthly.

I sighed and avoided her gaze. Every word she said hit my heart and it made me wonder how exactly she was saying the right words.

Did I really give Liam a chance? Have I really forgiven?

These questions started rolling in my head as scenes replayed. The answer to them, I don't really know.

I chuckled silently and shrugged.

"Iris, you know all I want is the best for you. But, look at them, hun. Ever since we saw them again, all they've been telling me about is their dad. You have a chance to complete your family. Me and Gab... Well, we don't have that chance." she says and laughs, trying to make the atmosphere light. But I felt her pain, I understood what she was trying to convey.

"I understand, Haley. Thank you." I said sincerely and hugged her tightly.

What have I ever done to deserve people that care for me so much?

We stayed that way for a while, content with watching the kids play and content with the silence. My mind was still a haywire of thoughts, but slowly, everything is getting untangled.

Everything is still a bit foggy, but I'm sure that soon, everything will clear up soon.

"Actually... I have something to tell you." Haley said all of a sudden. There was a hint of sadness in her voice and my heart skip a beat, a sign of warning that she was going to say a bad news.

I chuckled nervously. "You're scaring me."

"Yeah... Uhm, my family called." she said lowly, but I didn't fail to pick up the happiness in her voice. I gasped and put my hands on my mouth.

"Oh my! H-Haley, that's-that's great!" Finally, she smiled and looked at me. I could see the tears forming her eyes, but nothing like the ones I've seen before, these were tears of happiness.

"Yes, you know how long I've dreamed of this."

I knew, of course. I remember she used to call me at night, sobbing about how much she missed her family. Although she was slightly bitter, I knew how much she loved her family.

"Of course, Haley! So what's going to happen now?" I asked excitedly. But then, her smile turned to a frown.

"That's the thing... they're telling me to come home."

Oh.

-----

Iris Parker

I found Jace crying inside their closet.

The triplets had been playing outside when all of a sudden, he left and hadn't returned from then on. I was more than terrified when I couldn't find him. I felt like he was taken away from me.

I broke into cold sweats, my heart jumped out of my chest and the strength abandoning me.

I searched the whole house and it was only at my second time going in the triplets' room when I heard little sniffs from the closet.

As I opened the doors, I prayed with all my heart that he was inside and God must have heard my prayer because there he was. A great wave of relief dawned me and I could finally breathe.

I rushed inside and hugged him. "Oh my goodness, Jace! I thought you were gone. Don't do that again!" I said, unintentionally raising my voice. But instead, his cries became louder.

I let go of him to take a good look and tried wiping his tears away. What's going on? Why is he like this?

My heartbeat was fast at the same time warm, the familiar hurting was there.

"Jace, baby. What's wrong? Why are you crying?" I ask, trying to calm him down at the same time.

However, he kept crying. Both of his hands were trying to wipe his tears but it was useless since his tears kept coming. "You can tell me, baby. What's wrong?" I tried again. This time, his ragged breathing was calming a bit.

"I--I want to s-see daddy." he said. His eyes were red of tears and his voice choked as he told me that. My heart sank and bled.

Has it been that bad? If it has, then I have no choice. I have to call him... even if it's hard for me.

"Okay, okay. Don't worry. I'll call him, okay? He'll come right away." I told him, trying my best at feigning a smile. His breathing has steadied and I wiped his tears away as he put his hands down.

"Is that true, mommy? Can we really see him?"

I nodded immediately. "Of course. Now, why don't you go downstairs with your brothers while I make the call?"

Jace nodded slowly and left the closet while I grabbed my phone from my pocket and dialled Liam's number. I waited for a few rings before finally, I heard his deep baritone voice from the other line.

"Hello?"

-----

I sat alone in my room, looking outside the window. I didn't cry, no. I was the one who was being selfish the whole time and in the process, I was just hurting the ones I promised myself never to hurt.

I already knew it, but I ignored it. Again. It seems that I never learn from the same mistakes, do I? That's why I keep making the same mistakes.

It's true. I can't just give the triplets something only to take it away. They should not be the ones to suffer from Liam and my issues. It's unfair to them and unfair to him.

Right now, they were at Venialgo to spend the next few days with him. I didn't even see him when he came here.

I got scared because even if I would never admit it, I missed him terribly so much too. When I heard his voice from the other line, I wanted to tell him how much I missed him, how much I needed him. I got scared because if I saw him again, I probably would ask him to take me back.

I probably would've told him how much I still... loved him.

My love for him scares me because if he hurts me again in the future, if he uses me again, I might just turn a blind eye and keep loving him as if he was the most perfect person I've ever met. I've hit an all-time low, haven't I?

I heard a knock and soon enough, the door opened and lights were opened.

"Well, the house is certainly much more quiet." my dad joked. I turned to him and smiled. I sat up to face him as he sat at the chair in front of me.

"Yeah, it will be for a few days." I say quietly and looked outside, avoiding his eyes. I knew he felt bad for me, I could see it very well in his eyes.

And it was silent for a few minutes. He wanted to say something but he wasn't sure, so I waited.

"Do you know why our company hasn't died completely back then? Why, until today, somehow it's still running and I'm still the major shareholder?" he started. I couldn't help but furrow my eyebrows at him.

"Didn't you try to save the company from mommy's insurance?" I ask. It was her last wish also. My dad smiled and nodded.

"I was going to, but no. I kept that money for you. I just hope she doesn't get mad at me for that." he chuckled to himself and rubbed his knee. "I want to tell you a story, love. And I'm going to need you to listen very carefully. Is that a deal?"

I wasn't sure, but I nodded anyways.

"It was around five months after your mom died and one month after you disappeared. The company was in chaos, all the shares were getting sold at such a fast rate and I was losing everything I built. My partners and some friends have turned their back on me. I was at rock bottom. Your mom was gone and so were you. I've lost all reasons to live." I could notice the tears brimming his eyes and I had to hold back mine. "Everyday, it was getting harder to get up. It was getting harder to face the problems. Your mom wasn't there and you weren't there. I wanted to give up. I was going to. So through a few shady connections, I got my hands on a gun." I gasped and my eyes widened.

"D-dad!" he chuckled lightly and I couldn't understand why.

"Just listen, love. So there I was one night in my room. Sitting in front of a gun, contemplating the life that I'd lived. I was ready to do it, Iris. But then I heard a commotion going on downstairs. I was quite irritated of being interrupted, but I had to check it. I was getting up from my chair when the door opened violently. Do you know who it was, Iris?"

I thought for a while. "No." Again, my dad laughed knowingly.

"It was Liam. That bastard son-in-law of mine rushed here to stop me from killing myself." My eyes widened in shock and I took a moment to let his words sink in. Liam came here? To stop my dad? "Well, it turns out that he had been keeping me followed and found out about the gun. Can you believe it?" he laughed out loud again when honestly, there was nothing to laugh about.

"D-did he really do that?" I question through my shock.

He nodded, taking his glasses off and wiping them. "We even got into a big fight after that. I blamed him for everything. I blamed him for your mother's death, for your disappearance, why my life was a mess. I punched him numerously, believe me, Iris. I gave him what he deserved. But he didn't even fight back. He just let me beat him up and when I stopped, he said 'Is that all?' That bastard." he laughed again.

"After that, he bought back the shares that we owned and gave them back to me. The company wasn't as successful as it was when I got it back, but it was still running and making more than enough. For these past five years, he's been taking care of me in his own way." he says, a tone of finality in his voice indicating that his story had ended.

I just sat there, thinking about everything that he had said. Was that true? Did Liam really do that?

"I'm not asking you to get back with him, I'm just asking you to give him another chance."

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