Chapter 233

Jake groans against my neck as my hand closes around him inside his boxers. I almost jerk out of his hands with pleasure as his fingers find what I’ve wanted from him for weeks. Lack of touch down there has me at my most sensitive and I can tell already that I’ll cum the second he really is inside of me and not just those wickedly good fingers. Jake’s mouth captures mine again as he slides his hand in a rhythmic motion and I start the familiar internal building of hot waves and clenching pleasure. It’s happening too fast, weeks of not being touched is making my body long to climax. I’m over-sensitive and at this rate it’s going to be over before it’s started. I don’t want it that way. I want to savor this and enjoy it. I have him back, in his entirety, and I want it to be everything I’ve been dreaming of.

“Jake wait.” I pant, as my legs start trembling. I don’t want it this way, I want us to get past this emotional barrier he has and have him inside of me, all hot hardness of him. If he makes me finish before he starts, then he might not follow through and I need him more than air right now. I need his body and mine as one. He buries his face in my neck again, kissing me and pushing further into the rhythm our grinding has created with subtle moans.

“Jake? Emma?” A voice rings through the house rather loudly. The familiar song of a woman that you don’t want catching you up against a wall with her son; semi-naked and about to screw you. Jake immediately snaps his head up and looks at me in sheer surprise.

“Fuck, it’s my mom.” Jake pulls his hand out of me, slides me down to my feet and hauls down my dress, throwing a quick kiss on the corner of my mouth before retrieving his T-shirt from the floor and yanking it on crazily in one fell swoop; a move suggesting this isn’t the first time he’s almost been caught red handed by her.

Noooooooooooo!

I huff and pick up my cardigan, previously discarded on the floor next to me. Jake adjusts himself and buttons his jeans in almost lightening flash speed, already walking toward the door to go see Sylvana, while I sort myself back from the frazzled horny mess we’ve gotten ourselves into. My face is on fire and my body is screaming for release, tingling in a crazy motion, making me as grouchy as sin. I want to cry right now or just kick something … really, really, hard. We were so goddamn close!

Jake was so close to getting over whatever this bloody stupid fucking thing is.

I stomp around in a circle, buttoning up my cardigan and straightening my dress, trying hard to bring some calm to the fury of hormones ravaging me.

Maybe smashing something will help.

We were so close to him trying again but now, with the interruption from his mother, I’m not sure he will do that anymore, especially if cooling off while talking to Sylvana gives him time to re-think all this; make him go back to not wanting to try at all. It was unplanned and completely fueled by the thought of Daniel and Leila marking his territory. I could scream right now!

How on Earth am I going to find a way to get that spark back in him to where we’d almost been?

My skin is still tingling with the memory of his touch and I am sure as hell not going back to its absence. That sizzling sensation on my body has me aching with longing, a pain so intense that I am not, in any way, going to let this go. I need Jake to have sex with me or I am going to go insane.

I wander out into the hall and am greeted with the sight of mother and son talking. Jake looks unruffled and normal, not that it surprises me, even after full-blown, mind-numbing sex he has a knack for looking completely fine. Sylvana, on the other hand, looks flustered and completely uncomfortable.

There’s an embarrassingly loud wailing sound echoing our way from upstairs, which is so much louder out here than in the room I just left, traveling due to having no furniture or no floor coverings in the empty echoing house. Sylvana’s face turns beetroot as the noise pitches higher.

Yes, we’re standing here listening to Leila having what sounds like an earth-shattering orgasm right now … Lovely.

“So, yeah, I’ll bring Emma over soon, Mamma. We won’t be long.” Jake kisses her on the cheek and walks

her to the door talking loudly to cover the moans still happening overhead, trying his hardest to get her out the door fast. Jake is still an old-fashioned boy at heart and subjecting his mother to any kind of sexual noise is almost as painful for him as it is for her. He looks positively agitated. I’m trying not to count how many seconds it’s lasting, annoyed, with green-eyed jealousy as I glare at Jake’s back, a little moodily, and curse internally at our interruption.

It should be me making all that noise.

I don’t know why Sylvana was here, or if her departure is because of the obviously cringe worthy noises upstairs, but I can’t help but sigh with disappointment. The noise upstairs reaches its pinnacle with a rather embarrassing long drawn out scream and then deafening silence.

Thank God for that.

Jake shuts the front door and looks toward the ceiling with a hint of the Carrero Death Glare before walking back to me a little slowly. He lets out a long breath and glances back at the door as though checking his mother is completely out of ear shot.

“Remind me later to beat the shit out of Danny.” He grumbles and takes my hand loosely. I immediately get the vibe that what started between us is not going to continue at all. He has that whole aura of distance again with a calm and gentlemanly touch that screams celibate.

“Why’d your mom leave so soon?” I ask with more than a little attitude. Jake looks at me, with a frown and raised eyebrow combo, pointing out the obvious.

Ah okay. So maybe I would’ve run off too if I hadn’t been in the middle of trying to achieve the same noises myself.

“About before, Emma, maybe we should leave it for a bit.” Jake avoids looking at me. That urge to bash him on the head takes me over, disappointed rage and crazy hormones rise, hitting me hard.

I goddamn knew it.

“Not a fucking chance.” I snap in complete tantrum mode and yank my hand out of his. “I’ve had enough of this, you’re more than capable as you've just proven and if you don’t make good on what you started in there at some point today … then I’m going back to Queens until you fucking well do!” I spit harshly, lifting my chin toward him in complete frustration, weeks of pent-up sexual desire kicking in. Jake gawps, totally taken aback by this sudden and very loud verbal defiance and raises his hands in defense.

“Emma …” Jake puts a hand to my face, and I slap it away, a Leila type maneuver coming in handy. I am so beyond angry right now and the lack of sex between us has finally come to a head. I can’t handle this anymore, it’s torture.

“Don’t goddamn “Emma” me!” Tears prick at my eyes through sheer exasperation. This situation is getting beyond ridiculous and if I’m being honest it’s not just about the lack of sex either.

“You don’t want me, do you?” I spit as tears start falling hard. “You don’t get the same lust that I used to make you feel?” His face crumbles as he steps toward me, but I step back. He looks devastated which only upsets me more, but makes me think that maybe, finally, I’ve hit a nerve.

“Baby?” He tries to reach out for me again, but I hit his hand away, harder than before, fueled by heartbreak and emotions cruising through me at speed; pain aching inside.

“No. Don’t touch me unless you’re going to have sex with me! Do you have any idea how it feels having you go from being unable to keep your hands off me to this?” I wipe the tear away from my chin, angrily, moving anytime he tries to catch hold of me. Every frustration of the past few weeks bubbling to the surface in an extreme emotional breakdown and raging insecurity raising an ugly tortured head.

“It’s not like that, Emma … You know I still want you that way.” He’s trying but I’m not interested in hearing it, so fueled by hormones and frustration, my irrational mood moving back in. His actions of late haven’t shown me that he still feels that way, and now it’s no longer good enough to just hope.

“I want the Jake Carrero with zero ability to stop lust and love consuming him. The guy who screwed me in the back of a limo and the guy who pushed me against a hotel wall. Where is he? Because that’s who I fucking need!” I’m stomping around waving my hands, letting all fury loose, Teen Emma throwing her ponytail back in defiance.

“Emma, I don’t know what else to say.” Jake’s face is a mix of panic and pain, holding up his hands in a defensive manner, and he has no clue how to handle my sudden outburst or this version of me at all. This was supposed to be a happy day, getting the keys to our first home, and coming to see it now that it’s all ours. It’s ruined because our friends were too horny to get out of this house before having a quickie and it makes me aware that they are behaving exactly like we used to.

“You haven’t touched me that way since you kissed her!” I snap loudly, and his expression instantly turns sheepish. I swear I see the blood drain from his face, and I falter for a moment; as a tiny flash of doubt, from that bitch’s words, comes back to haunt me. Maybe he did do more than kiss her? I shake it away as stupid.

“I know.” He drops his gaze to the floor and closes his eyes. “I know how this looks, bambino, but it’s not like that. Hurting you, breaking up and then the baby, it fucked my head up more than I know how to explain, and I’m scared to have sex with you.” His voice is low and sincere, and it stops my rampant storming around, almost instantly. I turn to him more calmly, holding the crazy still for an explanation.

“Because of the baby? Talk to me, Jake, because this is killing me.” I beg him, moving toward him, holding onto the hem of his jumper like a vulnerable child, trying to understand.

“Every time I get close, Emma, all I can see is the way you looked at me that night. It’s not just about the baby it’s about how much I hurt you!” His eyes come to meet mine and flit down to my mouth, unable to rest on one feature, from eyes to mouth and back as though all he’s thinking about is kissing me. I’m shocked into silence by this unexpected confession.

“What do you mean?” I breathe softly. His slides his hands over my shoulders and he me closer, so we’re nose to nose