Chapter 53 Will you?

Chapter 53 Will you?

I don't want to say I won't let him go because I don't want to ruin what he asked me to do. She begged for me to leave her and God knows that I'll do anything she'll ask, even it means of loosing her. My steps stopped when she faced me again. Her cheeks are blushing and her eyes are puffy because of crying. I want to hug her but I stopped my self.

"My ... room is here." I know. Room 107

"Where's your room? I'll take you."

Even though I really know. Of course, I won't let her know that Celest did it all. That stupid cupid of ours always has her ways in our story. She opened her mouth looking like she has something to say but she backed out. He turned again and went straight to the villa. When she reached her door she faced me again.

This time, don't look at me anymore. The small hallway suddenly felt so spacious having this small space between us. I place my right hand on the wall supporting my self because of the thin space.

She seemed flustered with our position and the thin gap of our bodies but I seemed to be still lacking. The hint of alcohol scent did not give justice to her normal sweet scent. I was nervous thinking that she might push me but she didn't. I sniffed and prevented the smile from coming out. She look cute biting her lips and looking down because she don't want to meet mine.

"A-are you coming back?"

I was so closed of loosing it but I remained my cool. I don't know what else restraint I'm doing and for what else. I just think that she might get mad and hate me again. He will take back what he said he still loves me. Damn, she what?

"It's late. t-the road is dark." My mouth parted hearing her words. I was so amused thinking about what she might meant but I shook it off in my head. Does she want me to sleep here? No Levi, keep you shits together.

Yes, the road is dark so I took you. Not because I don't want to go back and enter your room and can't stop myself from making you feel fvck, no.

My legs were shaking as I walked along the beach. The thought of his words clouding my mind. He was just behind me, following me. I had many questions in my mind, I wanted to ponder and talk to him but I also thought I didn't know what to say. I don't know what caused me to be this nervous.

This foreign yet a little familiar feeling inside me is overwhelming. Is it because of the alcohol in my system? Or because of the words he uttered lately? I almost stumbled on my lame walk. This is not about the liquor anymore. I stumbled because I was out of myself and I felt like I was floating in the air because of what he said.

Did I think he had a girlfriend? Who's that woman? If I speak will we be together again? I saw his tears, I saw how his smile that broke me into pieces. He did not wait for my answer, does that mean that he thinks I'm declining him again? Does he think I'm rejecting him again and pushing him away? God! I'm going crazy.

Unselfishly I saw that we were already in front of the villa where my room was. I slowly struggled in his direction, still unable to look straight into his eyes. His expression is unreadable. It's cold and hard. I could do nothing but swallow the idea of asking him all the questions in my mind.

"My ... room is here." He stared at me.

"Where's your room? I'll take you."

My mouth went agape. Will it be delivered? Why do I feel differently about that word? Why do I feel like this will be that last time he will walk me home? What if he doesn't talk to me after that? Will we be like this again tomorrow? What will happen after this? Can I make the first move and do everything I want to do with him? I turned my back to him and close my eyes so tight.

I'm so frustrated. I feel like I'm going crazy with all the questions in my mind. All I know is that I want to be with him and I him to know that I want us to get back together. When I got to the hallway where my room was I faced him again.

His face is only a few inches into mine. I can smell his breath, making me want to jump on him and embrace him so tight like there's no tomorrow. My mind went more crazy when he placed his arms beside my head as if confining me. I bit my lips and my eyes went down. I can't seem to look at his handsome face.

"A-are you coming back?" I want him to say yes, yet half of me wants him to stay here so we can talk more about what's between us because for sure I won't be able to sleep tonight thinking about him and what's the real deal of us.

He did not answer my words. What if I Invite him to stay here, just for a few more hours? Or can he just sleep here and I'm just on the couch? No. That would be wrong and awkward. How is her baby waiting in their room?

"It's late. t-the road is dark." I uttered.

Not sure if it's to evict him or because I'm giving him the freedom to choose to stay here. My heart felt sad and confused. I feel blue and extremely crazy. I feel like I'm drowning in hope, but now that he's gone I'll lose my grip on the two of us again.

"Get inside. I'll go now." I looked up at him.

I know that's what he's going to choose but why do I still seem surprised? I tried to smile but I failed. I just bowed and nodded at what he said. Meanwhile, our position is still on this awkward position. I was very disappointed that night.

I couldn't sleep for many reasons. Did we get back together or did he base it on my answer so he thought I didn't agree? So the rest of my days there I wasn't able to have fun anymore.

Until the day of Sister Celest's wedding came, it seemed that heaven and earth still fell on me. Wearing a white puff sleeve dress with it's delicate embroidery on it, I paired it with a simple brown strap sandals.

The time I was confined to the room even though I could have gone to the venue first. If Lucy and Lourd hadn't knocked me in my room I wouldn't have come out. It's been three days since they got here. Everything seemed to blink at me.

I just want to spend more time in my room, I just say I'm busy at work every time they invite me out. I checked my look for one last time. My hair is in big wave curls that Lucy did.

When I had the chance alone I wore the gold leaf barrette he had given me before. I don't know what's gotten into me. I just want to feel a part of him. I want when he sees me he will know that it is still with me and I did not throw it away or forget it like what happened to the two of us.

Lourd's hawk like eyes pinned into the barrette. Our eyes met but I pretended to be nothing. Arriving on the venue, my heart seems to not cooperate. I think I even beat the bride because of the nervousness I was feeling. My eyes searched for him and I found him talking to groups of a few people.

He's wearing a simple white button down shirt, its first two buttons open exposing a bit of his chest. On his eyes are his aviators that made him look like ... sorry brother Paul but he really seems to be the groom. My goodness, I'm so whipped.

"My! I can't wait to get married."

Lucy shrieked out of excitement seeing the beautiful and extravagant venue. I smiled at him as his hands were anchored to my arm. Lourd is beside him, silent. Kuya Paul is on the altar together with the best man and the priest. Ate Celest is the only one waiting. There are also many visitors who have come from everywhere.

This is truly the most awaited part of the couple. Maybe for everyone it is just a simple ceremony but for the couple it will be the happiest day of their lives. And so when the arrival of the bride was announced. Everything has been quiet since the start.

I also had to go to my place for the entourage because I'm one of the bride's maid. I just smiled while walking down the aisle, less shy and pressured because clearly, I'm not what everyone is waiting for.

But when my eyes fell on someone, my knees almost wobbled due to nervousness. I could not see his eyes because of the glasses that covered his eyes. I just averted my gaze and continued walking.

The whole ceremony was like a movie, the exchanging of vows and the rings are a butterflies to everyone's stomach. Looking intently how the bride and the groom exchanged their ring to each other, made me remember some parts of my past. He never showed nor offered me a ring before, yet there's some times when he did asked my hand for marriage.

If I had agreed then would this be how we would both end up? Is it as fun as Celest's sister feels? How about him? Would he cry too like what kuya Paul did? When the priest announced the kissing of the groom and bride, I didn't even look for his figure in many people.

And I succeeded, his expression is serious. In the midst of the applause of the crowd the two of us did not even move our hands. I looked at him, not sure if he's looking at me too.

He heard the flesh of my mind because when he removed his dark glasses that covered his eyes it was the meeting of our eyes. My heart thumped loudly. I can't concentrate, my attention should be on them Ate Celest.

This should be their time. As I avoided looking at him, I saw an even more surprising scene. That woman I saw with him and that woman I thought he's with. Beside her is a man, carrying a toddler. They were on the other side of the chairs but I could see how the man kissed that woman, the baby girl even kissed the man carrying him too.

Them, looking like a happy family. I was weak at the sight. I blinked a few times trying to cope things up. My attention was focused on kila and Celest but until the end of the ceremony I was still not myself.

"Maybe I'll ask ate Celest, babe? The flowers are beautiful, I wonder who their supplier is."

Lucy was the noisiest in the table. Lourd and him is chatting and debating about some highlights of the wedding. But most of the time and only Lucy is noisy with the two of them. My eyes still can't take my eyes off the family I've seen before. I narrowed my eyes and confusion was for sure evident. Am I wrong? Levi begged for me on that night. Does that mean he really doesn't have a girlfriend? But why were they so sweet that time I saw them? Oh my God, are they cheating?

"Cyreese."

"Yes?" Lourd grabbed my attention.

"You're not touching your food."

"I-I'm still full."

His eyes narrowed. Obviously not believing what I said. I'm still obsessed with the family I've been observing. I hope I'm wronged, if they are cheating then that needs to stop. And did Levi really want to put me on the wheel he entered? What am I? A collateral damage?

"Are you okay? Everything's well?"

Lucy said. I nodded and smiled. But my conscience would not just leave me alone. These two don't know anything so nothing will be lost if I ask.

"Uhm ... do you ... guys know that woman?"

Their eyes both shifted in the direction of my eyes. I gulped a few times.

"What about her?"

Lourd said sternly.

"I just ... want to know. She's pretty and ..."

Lourd did not answer. I was just nervous when he looked at me. Because he seemed to be reading what was on my mind.

"That's Thalia Asterial. You don't know her? That's Erato's sister, Jade's husband."

"What?" Now my attention is full on Lucy. Who again? I know Jade's husband because I've met them before. But this Thalia Asterial is not familiar to me.

"And that is her husband, with their kid. Aww, look at them."

I seemed pale at what I heard. So am I right that that woman has a family? And while Levi and her are ...

"But I saw her with ... Levi a few days ago." I hesitate to say. Lourd still looks warm at me. And because I said that he confirmed what he wanted to know. His eyes went amused and his lips rose up.

"They are cousins." "Cousins?" My jaw dropped. I immediately looked in their direction and can't believe those two are cousins. I can't believe this. I felt wronged, accusing them with all the cheating matter. God, Ava! Lucy said a ready explanation but I couldn't hear it anymore because Levi approached their table.

They looked casual and the woman even kissed Levi again and they also greeted the man. I scratched my face and was embarrassed by my own allegations.

"Ohhh ... I see the ex, over there."

I breathed through my nose. To let Lucy know that I'm not in the mood to accept her teasing now. Just now, that I'm feeling guilty about what I've been thinking about the two.

And to think that I've lost a lots of sleep and spent my time locking my self into the room just because I thought he's in a relationship with another woman. This is a one hell of a crap, Ava. What a fool you really are.

"Are you sure you won't be attending the after party, Cyreese?" Si ate Celest.

"I'm sorry Ate Celest." The day after tomorrow will be my flight home. After the reception I had to say goodbye. I'm going back to the Solidad's mansion to get my things. I still have some important business to do while I'm here in Mar De Vena.

I will return to Solities alone. Since Lucy and Lourd will be staying for one more day because they arrived here late. Some bonding time, they say. Still wearing the dress I wore in the ceremony, and dragging my luggage into the car that Aunt Celest told me.

Ate Celest had a driver who I refused at first but then she just insisted because I was only here once. Arriving at the parking, I saw this white Prado with the same plate number ate Celest mentioned to me. At first I thought I was just wrong. Maybe not, right? He is not the only one with this car. And that's way before, maybe it's already sold or maybe-

"Get inside, I'll load this."

Inwardly it was as if cold water had been poured on me but on the outside my posture was calm. He didn't even wait for me to say something and just took my suitcase in his hands and put it in the back of his car. I want to ask what happened and he will deliver me.

But then I thought that this will be also the right time to talk to him after all of this misery. If there needs to be something to end with us then let it be. But if I have to plead him to be back to me then I'll gladly do so.

I got into the shot gun seat as he adjusted the luggage in the back. The smell is still the same. How I got to it then is still the same. I smiled and looked away so he wouldn't catch me. When he got inside the driver's seat that's when I looked at him. Our eyes met and he immediately turned away. I stare at him still, can't get enough of him.

"Celest told me to drive you home."

I smiled lightly and nodded my head. He took another look before turning on the car's engine.

"About what you said ..."

I started after almost forever in the car. I find it hard sorting out my thoughts so I was alarmed because I saw that we seemed to be close to the Solidads and I spoke even though I didn't know what to say. I looked at him again thinking he had something to say but only his jaw dropped as his eyes focused seriously on the road. I shook my head and closed my eyesn the eyes. This should be the right thing to do. This is worth it. He is worth it.

"C-can you come with me first?"

I saw his expression froze. I blinked for a few times, nervous that he might say no. Please ... It's been so long. Just entering the arch of that area was the immediate heaviness of my chest. He repeatedly looked around the corner of my eye but I couldn't look back at him because I was afraid tears would well up in my eyes.

The car stopped when I told him to. And there, I saw them. A two tomb stone beside each other, both looking neat even though I'm not able to see them since the last time I visited. I payed someone to maintain them, from working together and earning. With no words, I got out on his car.

The strong wind made my hair flew because of the open field. I no longer bothered to touch the flying clothes because my eyesight was already on them. I knelt in front of them and smiled.

My chest felt heavy, having both joy and longing is a bit too much for me. I felt Levi following me. He remained silent as I do my thing. In loving memories of Ava F. Suarez. In loving memories of Javier S. Suarez.

"Mom, Dad ..."

I removed the few leaves on their tomb. "I'm sorry if I've come empty handed." I uttered. But I brought someone who is not with me yet. I smiled at the back of my thoughts.

"I can't believe everything is so fast. Only a few years ago you were in my arms, and when both of you left ... there's just emptiness."

I smiled and look up trying to stop my tears.

"I'll admit, how many times have I let you down. How many times have I thought of just following, because ... the s-sick-sick. I don't know where and how to start, I don't know if how can it continue if you are the only reason for everything ... it's gone. "

I failed on holding my tears. Remembering all the pain and struggles I've been through. From the day they left me, to the present.

"Until now, I still miss you. I'm still longing for your presence every now and then. And until now, I still wonder how both of you just left me here that instant."

I took a few breaths to calm down. Only the whistle of the wind and the noise of the trees became noise.

"I'm back, but don't think that I left you. In all decisions and circumstances I've been through, both of you have been my strength and my wisdom. I hope you didn't think that I forgot you because the ala- You deserve the only wealth I have, which I carry with me everywhere I go. "

"Mom, 'Dad ... although my heart felt broken by the two of you leaving. I'm still grateful for all the memories you left with me. It's not just that, because you left me with the people who loved me and considered me my family. Even a brother who loved me wholeheartedly. Even so, you also left me with all the knots that I have to s-suffer alone. "

I swallowed the lump in my throat and another pool of tears started to form. I heard Levi sigh.

"Mom, I don't blame you for everything. Instead, I feel guilty because I know, at some point in your life, you suffered too and I'm not aware of all of that. Please forgive me if I'm not there for Please forgive me if I have done nothing to help you. And I will be forever sorry for all the heartbreaks and tears you chose to deal with.alone. "

"And now, even after all of these, I hope I still made you proud. Even after all the damage that I have to pay for ... I hope it's not yet too late. I did everything for you, so I hope in my last fight ... give it to me. " I wiped my tears and knelt properly.

"Today I'm back, to fight this with you. I'm sorry if I have to be selfish until the end but ... here in front of you two ... I brought the only person I loved. The person who gave me hope to go on again and made me feel the joy of life. The person who thought me that sunsets are also to thank for.

The only person who win my heart and always ... always mine. "

I broke down into tears. I rubbed my chest because of a mixture of pain and joy. I felt his hands on my shoulder as he crouched beside me. His hand slide down into my hand and as our fingers touched, he made it intertwined.

"Baby ..." He wiped my tears looking miserable seeing me cry so bad. I ignored him and continued.

"We lost each other a lot of times and the whole world felt like it's against us. I have nothing to blame but myself, I know that and I should but I've never been happy to leave him. Every morning strikes me, realizing that he's out of my arms again ... "

"I thought being left was painful enough, but I've proven that leaving is more painful. Especially since you love the person you left. Because of him I understood you, I also understood that it hurts for you. Leave me but maybe that's what's needed. All of that needs to be done because both of you want the best for me. "

"I was a fool of letting him go, for not fighting harder to keep him beside me. I was immature and afraid to choose him. I can't match the love he gives me. And now that I, again have the chance to choose, I'm finally choosing him. The reason I came here is not disobedience but with the hope of asking for your blessing. "

I looked at him and saw how shocked he is. With his lips parted and his hand looses it strength holding mine. I held him tightly. I smiled even the tears keeps on falling.

"Help me to win him back. Help me to fight all odds just to have him. He's the only one, he's the only one I want from you first and last."

I faced my whole body unto him. I held both of his hands as I saw his tears clouding his eyes. It still seems nothing to myself after all you've heard of me.

"Let me be the one to fight this time. You asked me once, I rejected you. You asked me the second time, I was not ready. I ask you this time ..."

I saw his adams moved in a harsh way. Obvious that he was nervous about what will come after.

"Levi, will you marry me?"