Chapter 19 My First Unfortunate Slumber Party

Mavis locked her bedroom door, "Alright everyone," She turned back towards us and shrugged, "Our unfortunate slumber party starts right now."

Most of the bedrooms at the school were actually old classrooms. Mavis still had a whiteboard and big cabinet and counter space in hers but she had doodles all over the beige brick of flowers and stars and other weird shapes that came together to look beautiful. She had a big bed in the corner of the room and we all arranged a border of pillows and blankets around it.

My heart has been racing ever since Jack figured out that there's a good chance there's a "mole" in the base which I'm not entirely sure what that means but I guess it means traitor. Somehow there's got to be another reason for my parents' bodies showing up here, at an address only a rebel would know, but from a place only a smaller group of rebels would know.

I met a lot of people during my time here, most of them were nice but any of them could have taken the information I shared and somehow figured out what house I lived at. I mean, another silver did it once before and the guy wasn't someone they've even heard about. Plenty of townspeople already know where we live, it's an open property and my parents are well known.

Were well known.

It kept sinking in over and over that they both were dead. They even knew they'd be dead soon and yet they still kept me a secret as long as they could. They certainly didn't love me and I don't know if I loved them and they died for me.

My first sleepover is one to make sure no one tries to kill me in my sleep.

I shuddered at the thought that the mole could be someone in this room right now.

'Do you honestly think it could be someone here?' Jack lurked to me, asking politely and not to degrade me which I was grateful for. I didn't mean to seem unappreciative but no one was entirely ruled out.

'I don't want to think that way when I honestly do trust you three but... you never know.'

Jack nodded, 'There's also Ethan, Jasmine, and the head to consider in this.'

'Would anyone at the other base know anything about me?'

He shuddered, 'The only person who would know something about you would be the big man himself, the man that sees all. Except that only works on Insurgents and not undead's so.'

It still makes me laugh thinking that they refer to regular people as "undeads" around here.

'Did I do something to make people who are here to literally help people like me want to turn me in?'

I watched Jack clench his jaw and aggressively shake his head, 'I don't know, Ayla. I don't think so.'

Jack isn't a very good liar. I've heard a lot of talk about how me being here was apparently bad? And I never asked why because I figured it wasn't something I would want to know for the sake of my feelings... I think there's something else going on.

"Our guest of honor Ayla, you can sleep in my bed."

I zoned back in and looked at Mavis who was sitting on the floor in her own sleeping bag instead of her giant bed sitting right next to me.

"What?-"

She nodded, "That way we are your little circle of first defense."

My skin trembled and I tried to ignore a very vivid and graphic picture of these three dying for me.

"Yeah even though you guys woke me up in the middle of the night I would easily fight for you, princess. No questions asked."

I blushed and stood up, sitting down on the edge of Mavis' bed, "I just... I want to say thank you to the three of you for getting me through this and... being so much more than that too." I offered a tiny smile and slowly let out a deep breath, trying to shake the nerves and calm down. I was worried I'd never come off the rollercoaster of emotions I've cycled through today. I was also afraid of the nightmares of my parents' dead bodies awaiting me.

What seventeen year old could say that? Aren't seventeen year olds supposed to go out to parties and do illegal things?

Mavis stepped over Jack's blanket and leaned down toward me, "Ayla, you reminded us that there's a world out there full of people worth fighting for. I know things have only ever been on different levels of difficulty but... we won't let anything happen to you."

"Thank you," I gave her a smile and watched her walk away and climb into her sleeping bag.

I sucked in my lips and looked at the first bed I'll be sleeping on in a week. I had originally hoped that it would be the bed at my own home that knew my body so well, but this came out of generosity during crisis... I've learned over the years that the little things are what bring you the most joy and comfort, even when everything seems to be fully awful.

I laid down, the soft sheets clinging to me and my damp hair making me cringe feeling the wet fabric under my neck.

Then I remembered a certain boy who doesn't sleep well despite having his own bed and I felt my heartbeat stutter.

'Jack... can I ask you something bad.'

'How dare you lurk to me at this hour?'

I felt a smile creep up on my face, 'Please? And don't be upset.'

'We'll see about that. What do you need?'

I took a deep breath and relaxed, 'Can you please just... come up here.'

When he didn't answer or burst out laughing or anything, I automatically regretted my decision of asking. I didn't want to come across as weird and I didn't want to ruin this solid bond I had going with him. Maybe there's a reason he never asked me the same question back in his room- this was stupid wasn't it? I just didn't want him to be uncomfortable at my expense-

The sound of shuffling made my heart stop and I felt the left side of the bed dip down as a new weight got on top. I tried to just ignore the fact this was happening and stare at the ceiling and from what I could tell in the dark- he had the same idea as me.

'Why was this idea so terrible? Why are your thoughts looking like alphabet soup right now.'

I heard my breath stagger in my throat, 'It seemed... wrong.'

'I mean... I can go back...'

'But I don't want you to.' I gulped. 'I'm afraid to go to sleep after today.'

I felt Jack turn on his side and I turned my face to look at him, I couldn't make anything but a silhouette out in the dark but I could imagine that careful look on his face that he always seemed to have on when he was being sincere with me.

'That's okay and I get why. I'm totally okay with being right here.'

I couldn't help but smile although he wouldn't see it, 'Thank you, Jack.'

I turned on my side facing against him and closed my eyes... but it didn't feel right. He felt... far away.

I tried to scoot myself closer but I didn't know how far away his body was and I knew I wouldn't make scooting until I found him subtle enough. I shouldn't push it.

But then his hand found my shoulder, and then his finger slid its way down my t-shirt until it found the bare skin on my arm.

I felt my breath falter and I nearly gasped- his hand is so warm.

'Your hair is still wet.'

I gulped and didn't answer. I wanted him to just ask if he could get closer just so I could tell him yes. I can't stand not being able to tell where he was... and I just wanted him near. Was that wrong? Did he want me to confide in him?

I nearly gasped when his warm body did find mine, and his hard chest was pressed up against my back. I could feel the heat radiating from his body, making me shudder and my tense muscles relax.

'Am I okay right here?'

I nodded, smiling softly to myself that he did actually ask.

The butterflies in my stomach intensified when his hand crept down from my waist and then landed against my stomach.

'Is this okay?' It felt like he was whispering right in my ear.

'Yes.'

I knew right at this moment there were about a million other and certainly more important things to be worried about but it felt relieving to just let go and try to rest before another day in this unpredictable world. I'm just glad that sleep wouldn't be riddled with nightmares and I would get the tiniest break away from my new harsh, cold reality.

'Goodnight, Ayla.'

I exhaled a breath I didn't even know I was holding, 'Goodnight, Jack.' My hand found and landed on top of the hand Jack at on my stomach and I gave it a small squeeze of gratitude.