Chapter 151 Bloody While

Avalyn

The silver-haired, blue-eyed lady appeared in front of me.

It had been a while.

"Hello," I smiled at her. I missed her and the peace her presence brought me. I needed that right now.

"Hello, Avalyn." She smiled and then captured me in a hug. "Today is a big day. But I don't have a lot of time."

"Huh?" My head felt fuzzy from being so close to her. Never had I felt so...unbothered and stress-free in my whole life.

This kind of peace didn't exist in the land of the living.

"Brighten the darkness, Avalyn."

"Save Nikolai."

"Lead them all to victory."

"The time is coming."

And just like that, she disappeared, leaving me confused as always.

I felt a finger trail slowly across my temple and then the side of my face.

I knew who it was; I didn't even have to open my eyes. The finger then curled a lock around itself before pushing it out of my face. And then it was back on my face, this time trailing down from the middle of my forehead to the bridge of my nose, as if it was tracing the lines, committing my face to its memory. And then it lowered to my lips, tracing their shape, familiarising with them again. After spending a good minute with them, the finger moved down to my chin before cupping it.

"Good morning, Love," Nikolai whispered.

He knew I was awake. Of course, he did.

I opened my eyes and found him crouching by the bedside, his arm resting on the edge of the bed, his head resting on it and his other hand still caressing the side of my face.

He smiled—a sad one. The smile spoke a thousand words.

I'm sorry. I missed you. I love you. I missed you a lot. I regret everything I did. Please forgive me. I'm back now. I love you a lot.

My eyes filled with tears, and a trembling smile formed on my lips. "You're here." My voice cracked as I barely managed to speak.

His smile fell as he caught a stray tear. "I am."

His dark grey eyes were filled with hurt when he stared into mine. "Do you hate me?"

My heart jumped at his question. If he asked that, it must've been on his mind for a while... "No."

He tilted his head, and despite being away and out of touch for so long, I was still so in tune with him. I knew he doubted my reply. "I didn't hate you. I was just furious at you..." I said softly. "But mostly, I was disappointed in you..."

His eyes lowered, no longer being able to look me in the eye, "I'm sorry." For trying to kill our own children was silent.

"Are you?" My heart ached as I questioned him.

His jaw clenched. "I'd never knowingly hurt you. At least not again."

I knew it was a momentary loss of control that nearly cost us everything we have left. It was like a veil of darkness had taken over him for a while. But I knew he regretted it the moment it was over. I just didn't understand why he didn't come back sooner. "That's not what I meant. You chose your hatred for Adrik over your love for me," I accused. That's what bothered me the most right now. "You knew I don't have a lot of time left... you chose to stay away to hunt your father, knowing you have a lifetime left to do that..."

He gulped, looking away again. "I'm sorry."

My throat closed up. He couldn't even look me in the eye while he apologised. And he didn't even bother to give me an explanation or even make up an excuse. "It's not okay. It is not okay at all."

"I know," he pressed his lips together. He was hiding something from me. "But what matters is that I'm here now, telling you I'm sorry."

I closed my eyes to reign in my tears. I took in a deep breath before releasing it. Did he just expect me to forget all that I went through in the last month? I woke up every morning feeling like I had lost a piece of myself. I had grown so weak...so...lost...I felt like I was just a shell of the person I used to be. And that was while I was struggling to make peace with the fact that I could hardly do anything by myself, having to ask for help at every turn, having to deal with the thought that I will never see my children grow up, hell, I might not even be able to see them...the tears I had worked hard to suppress resurfaced.

I won't get to hear them speak their first word, I won't get to see them take their first step, I'll miss their first day of school, or meet their mates, or know who they are as people...I'll never get to experience their love...they'll never know how much their mother loves them...

"Ava." Nikolai caught my hands and placed a soft, passionate kiss on the back of them.

I looked deep into his dark grey eyes that matched the sky and saw all the love they held for me. I'll not be able to meet him, to hold him, to kiss him for Goddess knows for how long.

I scooted back in the bed, and already knowing what I meant, he slid in beside me. I moved closer to him and pressed my lips against his. A shiver ran down my spine, and my toes curled in pleasure. I missed this. I missed him.

He raised his hand to cup my cheek and angle my head so that he could kiss me deeply. The kiss was soft and passionate before urgency kicked in, and it turned fervent. His fingers gripped my hair tightly before he turned my head in the other direction. The gentle display of dominance warmed my belly.

He trailed wet, open-mouthed kisses down the side of my neck before he sucked on my mark. A moan escaped my mouth, and I pressed my legs together as my core began tingling with need.

Nik's nostrils flared as the smell of my wetness registered. His hand instinctively slid between my thighs, crept under my panties and found my wet pussy.

I bit my lip to stop myself from moaning loudly.

"Don't bite that fucking lip," Nik hissed as he used his thumb to release my bottom lip from between my teeth before pushing his thumb in my mouth.

I sucked on it like I would his dick. His mouth dropped open, and he watched my mouth with unconcealed lust. His fingers massaged my clit expertly before sliding further down and pushing two fingers inside me.

I gasped at the fullness I hadn't felt in a while.

And then he began fucking me with his fingers. My eyes rolled to the back of my head, and my moans increased. I thrust my hips rhythmically to his movements. He took his thumb out of my mouth and pressed his lips to mine again, swallowing my moans.

"Fucking hell." He mumbled against my lips before sliding his tongue in my mouth.

His fingers inside me were unrelenting as they moved inside me, scissoring and pumping in and out as they brought me right to the edge and stopped.

I groaned as a complaint in his mouth, and he had the audacity to smirk. I opened my eyes and saw that his eyes were glowing with amusement.

I caught his lip between my teeth and bit down hard enough to make him hiss.

I tasted blood and sucked on it before releasing his lip. I licked my lip to taste the remnants of his blood. He tasted delicious.

"Finish what you started," I demanded.

He flashed me a grin. For a second, my heart stopped. It had been a long time since I had seen him smile like this.

"I love you." He declared, his smile turning bashful.

"And I love you." I grinned back. "Now get to work, Alpha."

"As you command, Luna." He bowed his head playfully before he sat up, extended his claw and ripped my dress, exposing my naked body.

He looked at me for a solid minute, taking in all the changes. I had grown a lot skinnier, but at the same time, my boobs looked a little heavier, and my belly looked like it could burst any minute. Which was true; I could give birth any day now.

I thought Nik wouldn't like seeing me like this...all weak and very pregnant.

But a miracle happened. He raised his hand and then gently placed it on top of my belly. A second later, I felt two legs kick against his hand. I winced in pain.

Nik took his hand away immediately and looked at me with remorse, "I -I'm sorry."

"No!" I said immediately and caught his hand before placing it right back. "It's fine. Go ahead." I had been waiting for his moment since forever. I never thought it would come.

The next kick was a little soft, almost as if they knew that they had hurt me and wanted to avoid it this time around. They simply wanted to greet their Dadda.

A small smile formed on Nikolai's lips, and tears erupted in my eyes. It was perfect. Everything about this moment was perfect.

Nik lowered his head and placed two soft kisses on my belly.

My heart was bursting with love for my little family. Now I had no doubt that Nik loved them. And he would raise them with all the love I knew he was capable of giving. And that was all I ever wanted.

Then he moved and sat between my legs. He caught my ankles, raised them and then placed them over his shoulders before he lowered his head between my thighs.

I gasped when he placed a soft kiss against my core.

It had been so long since we had done anything sexual, and his earlier ministrations had left me tender, horny and eager for more. So when he sucked on my clit, I felt like I would come in seconds if he kept this up.

But then something embarrassing happened. I felt like I was going to pee, so I quickly shoved him away.

"The fuck?" Nikolai rose on his knees and looked at me in confusion before he looked down, and his eyes widened.

I freaking peed myself. I covered my face with my hands in embarrassment, "I'm so sorry."

"You didn't pee yourself." He whispered, and his tone made my heart drop. "Your water broke."

I raised my eyes and looked him in the eye. Both of us were thinking the same thing. This is it.

This was it. Today was the day our children were going to take their first breath. And today was the day that I was going to take my last.

Nik scrambled to my side with urgency in his eyes before capturing my mouth in a bruising kiss. The kiss conveyed everything we didn't have the time to tell each other anymore.

But the only thing that seemed important right now was, "I love you."

I heard a slight 'click'. That's when I felt a collar around my neck. Huh? I raised my hand to touch it, but Nik caught my hand, "don't. It'll hurt you." It would have burned me if I had felt the outside of it.

"What are you doing?" My voice rose.

He stood up to his full height and took out a familiar ring from his back pocket. It had a green stone on top of it.

My eyes widened when I realised what it was.

It was the same collar, and ring Xillian had used to control me all those months ago.

He put the ring through his middle finger and closed his hand in a fist as if he needs to gather strength to use it.

"What the hell are you doing, Nikolai?" I asked, feeling restless. Something was wrong. I could feel it.

He looked at me with searing pain in his eyes. "The right thing."

"I know you're planning something. And you're going to force me to do it. If it was right, you wouldn't have to force me to do it." My heart was beating fast in my chest.

He kneeled down and kissed me softly before resting his forehead against mine, "I love you. Always remember that."

"What are you doing, Nikolai?" My voice rose. I was scared. No, I was terrified.

He had a look of determination and finality in his eyes. He had already decided upon something and was going to do it either by hook or crook.

"I have something for you in the drawer of my nightstand." He said with a crooked smile. "Please follow the instructions on the covers, okay?"

"Okay," I replied. And then a sharp pain in my uterus made me lose focus. The contractions were starting. And they were painful. I couldn't even imagine how painful the birthing process was going to be. And I would have to go through it twice.

"Breathe, Love. In. Out. In. Out." He said, his tone worried as he correctly demonstrated how to breathe. I followed him, and slowly, the contractions subsided, but I knew they would be back in some time.

And then he reached down to feel my core. He frowned, and then he looked down as if to check something. "About four centimetres already." He looked up at me, "we don't have as much time as I thought we did. We need to hurry up."

"What?" How does he know all of this? Maybe I wasn't the only one who had read up on pregnancy and kids.

"You should get dressed." He said before he darted into the closet and came out with a knee-length yellow sundress.

I took it and wore it without any protests. "Nikolai," I gritted, "answer me. What the hell is going on? Was this all a lie? A trap, just so you could collar me and make me do your bidding?" I accused.

He gently cupped my face with both of his hands and looked straight into my eyes, "I need you to trust me, Avalyn. I want you to know that everything that I am doing is for us. For you. You might even hate me for it, but just try to remember that you love me." He half-smiled before turning serious again, "and no. It wasn't a trap. I'd never take advantage of you like that."

His words calmed me down. But I needed more assurance. "Promise me that you will not do or make me do anything that will harm my children."

His jaw clenched. "Our children, Avalyn. And yes, I promise you that our children will not be harmed."

His thumb gently caressed my cheek, "once all of this is over, just try to understand where I'm coming from. I'm just looking out for us and trying to do what is best for our family."

I released a breath. That was all I wanted. I didn't care what else he made me do. I definitely would have done it without being under the influence of the collar as well. In the short amount of time we had spent together, I mainly had used my powers to hurt him, to hurt those I cared about. To know that I spent my last moments using them in a way that helped Nik...it would make me very happy.

I raised my hand to cup his cheek, and for some reason, my eyes welled up with tears, "I don't think I'll have the time to do that. I love you, Nikolai. Always." I trusted him. I knew that every thought he had was with me in his mind, and every decision of his was taken after considering my wishes.

He blinked back tears before giving me a small smile. "It's time to go, Love."

Another shot of pain struck me before I felt my uterus contracting and expanding again. It hurt so much.

"Breathe, love, like I told you," Nik showed me, and I followed him, powering through the contractions. After a few minutes, they went away.

Once he was sure I was okay, he picked me up and walked out of the bedroom. Eliyah was standing right by the door, looking at both of us with a thoughtful expression. He began following us to the basement.

I couldn't stop staring at Nik. It felt like we were so close, yet oceans apart. Our hearts were tied together, but for some reason, I felt like we were barely hanging on to each other.

Nikolai seemed to realise I was going through turmoil. He gave me a small smile, "I love you." He pressed a kiss on my forehead and then whispered, "I'm not going to let anything happen to you, don't worry."

And just like that, all my scattered thoughts, the tightness I was feeling in my chest went away.

I believed him. Maybe that's the reason he looked so determined. Perhaps he had found a cure. That's why he seemed so calm. It just might be challenging to execute, which was why he made me wear the collar. If I was in active labour, it would be difficult for me to focus on anything. The collar would take care of it.

But I wondered what he wanted me to do.

"What is your plan?" I inquired.

"I have a cure— it is a definite way to make sure you live," Nik explained.

My eyes blurred with tears at the news.

My entire life—full of possibilities flashed in front of my eyes.

I'll be able to live with Nikolai. Grow old with him. I'll be able to see what my children look like; I'll see them grow up and know who they are as people.

"Really? Why didn't you tell me earlier?" I was so worried earlier!

"Yes, really." He placed me inside the car and buckled me up. "So that you'd forgive me quicker."

I wanted to scream at him a little, but another set of contractions hit me.

Shit. It hurt so much.

These ones were more intense and painful. And lasted longer than the previous ones. I cupped my belly, wishing for the pain to ease up.

Nik didn't waste a second to speed out of the garage.

"Are you okay?" I realised Eliyah was in the car with us too when he asked me that.

"Yes," I breathed when the contractions finally ended.

I took a deep breath and just hoped we would get to the hospital quickly. I could feel that the babies weren't going to stay in there for very long. They wanted to come out. Now.

I tried to identify where we were but failed. That's when I realised that the sky looked like a storm was brewing, which was unusual because it was usually sprung in Soare-Luna.

I looked at Nik. For some reason, the sky reflected his mood. If it was anyone else, they would think he looked normal. But his impassive expression didn't fool me. He was going through a whirlwind of emotions.

Maybe the curing process really wasn't that easy.

But I couldn't even worry if I wanted to. Nik said it was fine, he told me to trust him, and I did. That and the collar was doing its job.

I placed my hand over his and caressed it with my thumb in an attempt to calm him. He released the steering wheel with one hand and captured mine in his own. He squeezed it before kissing the back of my hand.

"Are you okay, Mi Amor?" I asked gently.

He let out a shuddering breath. "I am." He lied.

Nikolai lied to me.

Something wasn't right. I just wasn't worried because the collar was doing its magic. But I still couldn't ignore the gnawing feeling in my gut.

The road we were taking didn't lead to the hospital. I should have noticed this earlier. In fact, it led to the outskirts of Imporia. "Where are we going?"

"To make everything right." He replied without looking at me.

I didn't have a built-in lie detector like Nik, but I knew when my mate wasn't a hundred percent honest with me.

"Ni—" another wave of contractions just hit me, and I cupped my belly and bent forward. I couldn't control the whimpers that escaped my mouth as my uterus painfully expanded and contracted.

"Avalyn." Nikolai sounded worried. He sped up the car and rubbed my back at the same time. "Breathe, love."

I looked at him through blurry eyes once they ended, "we need to go to the hospital."

"You're not giving birth at the hospital." He murmured. "Spread your legs, please."

"I'm not?" My legs instinctively parted.

He extended his arms and reached inside my dress. He parted my folds and before feeling my vagina.

"About eight centimetres. Fuck." He muttered before he began racing down the road.

"Since when did you become a doctor?" I muttered.

"It's basic biology." He replied, glancing at me before focusing on the road again. "How do you feel?"

"I'm fin—" before I could complete my sentence, another wave of contractions started, and I couldn't help but cry out in pain.

Do all women go through this? And they have multiple kids?

This contraction lasted longer and was more intense. I gripped the sides of the seat, and my head fell back on the headrest as I tried to power through them.

"Hospital," I cried. "I cant, Nik, I can't."

They would give me the epidural, and I would be fine after that. I needed something for the pain.

"You can and you will, Avalyn. You will pull through this," Nikolai's tone was hard and demanding when he said that. And a newfound strength took over my body.

I could do this.

I am a mother. I have to birth to my children. I need to be strong for them.

But I was just so damn uncomfortable in this seat.

In the next minute, Nikolai turned the car and started driving off-road. In the middle of nowhere.

It was a large piece of empty land with no one in sight.

Should I be worried?

I looked at Nik. He kept looking at the road in front of him in determination.

What was he planning?

What was he going to do?

He had promised he wouldn't hurt our children. But...

I bit my lip.

I trusted him.

I love him.

I have to believe in my love for him and in his love for me.

My thoughts were disrupted by another set of contractions. I gritted through them. I could bear the pain. I could endure any pain in the world for my children.

They wanted to come out now, and I would do everything in my power to make that happen.

The next few minutes were in a blur. Nikolai stopped the car, and Eliyah opened the door.

Nikolai was by my side and picking me up the next second.

He walked for how long, I couldn't remember. The pain of the contractions had made my mind hazy. I knew I had two sets of the worst contractions I had had while Nikolai walked with me in his arms.

He set me down on my feet before cupping my cheeks and making me look up at him. "You're the strongest woman I know. You're the strongest person I know. You can make this, Love. I believe in you. I love you. More than life itself."

And then he kissed me. The salty taste of his tears was something that shocked me.

"Nikolai?" I was confused.

He blinked back his tears. "Give me your hand."

I held out my hand, and he took a familiar white fruit from Eliyah's hand and handed it to me. It was the bonsai tree's fruit.

"Don't eat it until I tell you to. And don't swallow it until I tell you to. Understand?" He asked.

"Yes, Nikolai." I murmured.

"Now sit." He gently pushed me down on a seat that I didn't realise was behind me.

When he moved, I saw my gynaecologist and another doctor, along with two nurses. I saw a group of the Neos army, along with Max and Andrei, but they were a little far away, in the middle of the open ground.

What was happening?"

"I love you." Nik placed a last kiss on my forehead.

"I love you too," I said, a feeling of dread settling in my stomach.

Nik turned around and then walked to the middle of the field.

For some reason, my heart was in my throat. Something wasn't right. My gut told me to stop Nikolai.

What was he doing?

He had been so tight-lipped in the car.

I stood up, but Dr Tracy stopped me. "It's not safe, Luna."

Why is it not safe?

Another set of contractions hit me, and I sat back down on the seat with a cry.

It hurt. So fucking much.

The next second, the doctors and the nurses began fussing over me. By my eyes couldn't leave Nikolai's back.

'Save Nikolai.' The voice of the silver-haired lady rang in my ears.

And then I saw a familiar man walk out from the other side of the empty ground.

Adrik.

And he held a chain in his hand that was connected to the cuffs Mikhail was wearing.

I saw Adrik say something, but I couldn't hear it. And then Nikolai began walking towards them.

'Save Nikolai.'

Something was deeply wrong. I could feel it in my bones.

"No!" I screamed, pushing them away. "They aren't coming out without their father!" And then I was running towards them.

I heard people running after me, but I didn't care.

'Save Nikolai.' Saving him was all I cared about.

Adrik released the chain, and Mikhail began walking towards our family, but Nikolai kept walking towards Adrik and his people.

I saw Adrik's hands turn into claws.

'Save Nikolai.'

I raised my hands to use my powers, to kill Adrik this second.

But they didn't work on him.

A scream of frustration ripped out of my mouth as the nurses caught me.

"Release me." I hissed.

I wanted the blood of the person who was holding me captive. Who wasn't letting me leave. Who was coming between Nik and me.

'Save Nikolai.'

A thin veil of red filtered my vision. But it got sharper. And I felt stronger than I had in a while.

"Release me, or I will kill you." I snarled at them, and the next second, I was free.

I could feel the contractions. I knew they wanted to come out now.

But it didn't register.

At that moment, every cell of my body wanted to save Nikolai.

'Save Nikolai.' Her words kept repeating themselves in my head, like a mantra.

"Nikolai." I was running towards him again.

'Put the fruit in your mouth.' He ordered through the mind-link without looking at me.

The fruit that I was still holding was slightly crushed because I had been clenching my fists. Nevertheless, I put it in my mouth.

Max caught me before I could run past them.

"Release me." I snarled.

"No," Max replied.

'Save Nikolai.'

"I need to save him," I growled. "I need to stop him."

"He's just going to negotiate with him. He'll be fine, Avalyn. You, on the other hand, are not." He calmly replied.

"No! He's not fine." I cried. I couldn't seem to stop crying. Something terrible was going to happen. I could feel it. "Let me know. I need to save him."

He didn't know. He wouldn't understand. He couldn't understand what I was going through, what I was feeling.

'Save Nikolai.'

I felt like I was going crazy.

'Calm down, Avalyn.' Nik's voice popped in my head stopped. 'Stay where you are. Do not come near me.' He ordered, and I slumped in Max's hold.

I could not believe he just did that. He knew I would do this. He knew I would try to intervene.

This is why he put the collar on me.

'Chew.' Nik ordered, and I began chewing. 'Make a small cut in the centre of your palm.' I grabbed a dagger Max had hidden in one of his boots and sliced open my palm.

What the hell was he doing?

'Repeat after me.' He said, 'quia vita tua.' His hair immediately turned golden after he said that.

"Quia vita tua." I couldn't help but repeat. A drop of my gold coloured blood dripped down on the ground.

'Meum est enim vita tua.' He said.

"Meum est enim vita tua." I repeated as I chewed on the fruit. Another drop fell down.

"Quia vita tua. Meum est enim vita tua." Nikolai said. That's when I noticed that his hands were fisted. But one of them was bleeding and dripping his blood on the ground too.

"Quia vita tua. Meum est enim vita tua." I repeated, still chewing. The more I kept saying the words I didn't know the meaning of, the more I kept bleeding.

"Quia vita tua. Meum est enim vita tua." Nik said.

"Quia vita tua. Meum est enim vita tua." I repeated. I felt a surge of power in my body, and my bleeding increased.

"The fuck are y'all doing?" Max muttered.

"Quia vita tua. Meum est enim vita tua." Nik's voice rose and his body lit up with fire.

"Quia vita tua. Meum est enim vita tua." I repeated, and I could feel my powers increase and come to the surface.

I was hit with a contraction so painful that I almost fell to the ground, but Max kept holding me up.

"One last time together, then swallow." He said. I would power through this.

"Quia vita tua. Meum est enim vita tua." Both our voices were loud as we chanted together, and then I swallowed the fruit.

'You'll live now. Tell our kids I love them.' Nik said through the mind-link.

The drops of blood on the ground rose up in the air and met Nikolai's blood halfway. And then they began spinning in the air until the gold and red became one magical colour. And then they flew towards the sky, so high up that it wasn't even visible anymore.

I heard a loud bang, and my ears started ringing.

No...

I looked back in front of me.

Oh my Godess.

Adrik had a gun in his hand. It was aimed at Nikolai. My eyes widened, and my heart stopped.

Please no...

I heard another two loud, unmistakable shots and then saw the back of Nikolai's white shirt turn red. The world faded away. All I could see was Nikolai. He was all I wanted to see.

"I love you, Ava..." Nik's feeble voice hit my ears.

No...

No. No. No. No. No. No.

Nikolai...

'I'm just looking out for us and trying to do what is best for our family.'

'I love you. More than life itself.'

What did he do?

What the hell did he do?

"Let me go!" I screamed, thrashing in Max's hold so that I could go heal Nikolai.

I felt our connection break.

I felt his soul detangle itself from mine.

I felt his wolf die.