Chapter 9 DRAMA

Eve

Help!

The avenger is out to get me.

For the better part of five minutes -- I kid you not -- Ebere has been trying valiantly to get me to stand up from my bed, but my brain has refused to boot, even though she has been breathing down my ears like a dragon without fire.

"Girl, get your behind up. At this rate you'd be late for the wedding."

I groan and cover my ears with my pillow. "It's not my wedding though," I'm still very sleepy so I settle into a more comfortable position. I feel the pillow being dragged from me and before I can say Jack Robinson, I hear a whoosh and it lands heavily on my head, making me partially deaf for ten seconds.

"I knew you'd behave this way. That's why I decided to sleepover last night," she rants. "Your black . . ." She pauses. "No! Your yellow - cream ass isn't serious."

My back is still turned to her when I reply. "Did you just forget the colour of my ass?" Then I turn around. "Seriously! You actually forgot the colour of my ass?" I echo, once again.

Her mouth forms a perfect o as she looks at me. I know she's trying to decide if I'm serious or not, so I shape my face into some semblance of seriousness. I can't keep it up, so I burst out laughing. The relief on her face is quite hilarious. Finally, she joins in. When our laughter dissipates, I sigh and slowly get up to sit on the edge of the bed.

"Promise me I'm going to have fun today and you're not going to leave me hanging?" Ebere has a terrible tendency of running off when we go to new places together.

She looks aghast. "Have I ever done that, bestie?" She actually looks mortified. Is she for real right now?

"Stop talking and promise me!" I insist, getting up and walking towards her, my palm extended in a shake.

"Best friend's honour!" she replies, shaking my hand and looking serious. "Now let's get this show on the road. I really want to attend the church wedding."

"Okay, fine. I'll go bath first." I stand up and head for the bathroom.

"And please, don't stay there for an hour. She shouts. "I still have to do your hair and makeup."

"Yes ma'am," I reply as I step into the bathroom.

Three hours later and we are seemingly ready. By seemingly, it means Ebere has 'almost' finished painting her face. I stare at my reflection for what seems like the umpteenth time. A stranger stares back at me. It's uncanny - I mean, I look like me, yet I don't look like me. I sigh as I look at Ebere, fixing, and then removing the fake eyelashes once again.

"Ebere if you do that one more time, I swear to god, I will remove my clothes and lay back on the bed. From where I'm sitting it looks very inviting. On 3, 2 ....." I begin the countdown.

"Well, I guess I can do without it, right?" She turns to me but I just stare at her blandly.

"Alright! I admit I'm the one who's making us late right now." She stands up and twirls around for me to see. "How do I look?' She actually looks fab. More than that, she looks stunning.

I stand up and walk towards her. When we are close, we strike a pose as we stare at ourselves in the mirror. "You look stunning dear." I smile at her.

"And you . . ." She pauses, shaking her head. "Let's just say someone’s gonna marry you tonight." We laugh at her silly statement.

* * *

"Can you believe this? We've been stuck in traffic for the past forty-five minutes." Ebere complains. She fiddles with the dial of the radio looking for stations playing music. She finally settles for one playing country music. She claims it helps to soothe her nerves.

"Will you please calm down!" There's an edge to my voice. This is almost the tenth time she's said that. I can't help it if there's traffic on a Saturday. She's the one who made us late, so she'd better zero her mind that we can't attend the wedding except for the reception. It was supposed to start at 10 am. It's already 1 pm now. I just hope we'll be able to get seats. I know for sure that Lagos wedding receptions are always jam-packed. I don't voice my fears though.

"You should be grateful that the air conditioner is working." I turn to her with a smile. "If not we would be in traffic and ugly as hell with foundation running down our faces." I tap the steering wheel, my long fake nails flashing blood red under the glint of the sun - Ebere's idea, yet again!

"Thank you Lord!" she says dramatically, looking up at the roof of the car. "She finally grew a brain and listened to me." I hit her on the hand playfully and she darts away to avoid any more onslaughts from me.

As we make small talk, the traffic eases up and we begin moving again. Some twenty minutes later, I'm driving into the venue and my worst fear is confirmed. I gaze at the rows and rows of cars already parked. Yup! It's going to be near - impossible getting empty seats now.

I see a few Lamborghini's and Ferrari's and as I look for a place to park my matrix, I spot some more flashy cars. Okay, so there'll be some super-rich people here today, got it!

I chew the inner skin of my cheek, nervousness taking over suddenly. Ebere notices and puts a hand on mine. "You'll be fine. See as you be na! What man wouldn't want to take you home to mama?" I smile at her and park the car. A security man comes up to us and asks for our gate pass. Ebere hands him a small card. He scrutinizes it thoroughly, tears off a part of it and gives it back to her.

As I lock up, Ebere comes to my side holding her phone up. "Selfie time bestie, smile for the camera," and we strike a pose. Immediately she begins to upload it on her social media profiles as we walk to the tent-like structure where the reception is taking place.

I can already hear loud music echoing forth. Yoruba drums are being beaten, striking a sonorous sound. I catch a glimpse of people taking selfies in groups in front of the tent. Some of them look our way as we pass them. "Asanwa!" (Fine girl) One of the guy comments as I pass him but I don't give him a second glance.

When we get into the tent, it's like a totally different world. It's huge and stretches as far as the eyes can see. The ceiling is an overlapping mass of white swirls. There are rows and rows of beautifully decorated tables and chairs. And on each table, there's a myriad of drinks. I spot Courvoisier, vodka, Hennessey, scotch, and a series of other assorted hot drinks that I don't recognize.

Uniformed waiters hover about, waiting to do the bidding of people. On the extreme right side, rows and rows of tables of food have been set up, buffet - style. As we walk around looking for unoccupied seats, I see different types of seafood; there's calamari, oysters, prawns. There are also snails and crabs. Wow! They sure didn't spare any expense for this wedding.

I see names and tags on each table. Ebere keeps a keen eye out for the table that's tagged 'colleagues'. When she finally spots it, we make our way over there, but it's occupied - not one seat, is left unoccupied. She chats a bit with some of her colleagues while I stand awkwardly, looking around.

"Babe!" She taps me. "See those empty chairs over there?" I follow the direction she points to.

"Seriously?! Can't you see that it's marked bridesmaids and bridegrooms?" I'm already getting antsy. "I'm not going there." I finish stubbornly.

"Babe, I'm sorry! I know it's my fault we came late. Mabinu! Ndo! "But you know that's our only chance of getting any seat. If Fiku sees us, she'd definitely tell someone to show us to a table with free chairs, but we don't have much of an option. This tent is huge and we can't keep walking about. We just have to go sit there." She finishes, looking at me pleadingly.

She knows I'm shy, most especially in a large crowd such as this. "I've got your back dear, just follow my lead," and she saunters off.

I grit my teeth and follow her, seeing no other option in sight.

As we get closer to the table, all eyes turn to us and I feel like the ground should swallow me up.

I will never listen to Ebere again!

- @ -

SEGUN

I frigging hate weddings, especially the ones with so much pomp and pageantry. I mean, it's much ado about nothing. What's the point getting married? It's an exercise in futility to me.

All those sweet promises of nothing, then you both turn around and hurt each other. When Femi and Fiku exchanged their vows earlier, most of the bridesmaids cried - big pretenders - the lot of them. Love is just another word for hurt and pain.

How can I give a woman so much power over me? To break me, To stomp all over me! Naah! It's not just for me. I'm never getting married. If it wasn't for Femi, I'd never be caught dead at any wedding.

Just glad it will soon be over!

I look around me, fishing for something to catch my interest. Chioma smiles at me but I ignore her and keep looking around.

She'd tried her best to chat with me, but she wasn't even cutting close. I know for a fact she changed her name tag from the opposite end of the table where she was supposed to seat, to where mine is, just so she could sit beside me.

Obviously, I couldn't do anything about it because I didn't want any drama, least of all at Femi's wedding, so I've completely ignored her instead.

I'm bored as fuck right now!

I look over to where Dipo is and I see him fiddling with his phone, slouched over. Looks like he's even in a worse state than I am, so I grab a bottle of Hennessy and a glass, and walk over to him. The lady beside him smiles up at me and I smile back at her.

"Hey! Mind if we change seats for pa bit? I'd like to talk to my buddy." The smile on her face falters, and she reluctantly gets up, grabs her purse, and walks over to where I was seating.

Yeah! Keep it moving shorty!

"Hey, man, wetin dey?" (Hey man, what's up?) He puts his phone down and looks at me, relief pasted all over his face.

"Old boy! If no be sey na Femi wedding, I for don comot from here tey tey," (If it isn't for Femi's wedding, I'd have left here since). I reply, setting down the Hennesy bottle and the glass on the table and leaning back in the chair.

Dipo laughs. "You don tire for your babe?" (Are you tired of your babe?) He jerks his head towards Chioma.

"She is not my fucking babe, okay? My voice begins to rise, but I will myself to calm down. "She's just a babe I bang occasionally, that's it." I pour myself a full glass of Hennessy, throw it down my throat, and then I refill it again.

"I know man, calm down! Just yanking your chains a bit. She's been giving you puppy eyes ever since you came to sit here." He mirrors what I did by pouring himself a glass and throwing it down his throat.

"I don't give a fuck! She doesn't own me. Let her find another nigger to leech unto." We clink our glasses and toast to more enjoyment.

Silence reigns thereafter as we get lost in our separate thoughts. The MC keeps mouthing off about how the bride and groomsmen met. Shortly after, he calls them out to dance and I watch as Femi leads Fiku to the dance floor.

They look good together, I must admit. Who would have thought they had only met some four months ago through Chioma and according to Femi, it was love at first sight.

"Dayyuuuummm!" Dipo exclaims suddenly.

I look at him and his jaw has suddenly turned slack.

"Man, pick up your bottom jaw." I flick his jaw but he doesn't even flinch.

He doesn't say anything, except to lift a finger and point towards a direction. I nonchalantly glance at what he's pointing at and do a double-take.

My mouth hangs open as well.

Holy Cow!!!

Is that . . . Eve?

I stare unabashedly at the vision before me. She's like an apparition. Whether from heaven or hell, I don't really know, It remains to be seen.

Look at that body!!!!

The black dress she's wearing clings to her every curve.

Her shoulders are completely bare, revealing slender creamy skin. There's a daring dip in between her perfect B-sized cup breasts in form of a heart shape. I doubt if she's wearing a bra.

Dammmmnnnn!!!!

And that's not all - The dress clings to every shape, curve, and edge, molding every perfect curve for all to see. There's a slit that's cut thigh-high. It runs from her right leg right up, revealing a perfectly toned leg and full creamy thigh. Her black - strappy heeled sandals reveal red toenails. She turns to the side and her butt juts out like an added extension of her body.

The hard-on that hits me is both terrifying and exciting at the same time. I shudder involuntarily. Suddenly I notice everyone is staring at her also. No one at the table is watching the bride and groom - the onus seems to have shifted to Eve.

They're practically poking holes in her body with their eyes.

"Isn't she the same girl at the club?" Dipo asks beside me. For some weird reason, he's whispering.

"Yes!" I reply, whispering back, not taking my eyes off her. She's with another chick I recognise as the one she was with at club dizzy.

Just as I'm about to get up to go to her, she settles into the same chair I just vacated - right next to Chioma.

Damn!

And I settle down once more on my seat. I keep my eyes trained on her. She's definitely not wearing a bra and her nipples are practically screaming - come get me!

My goodness, she's a sex goddess.

Her friend sits down beside her and I watch them discreetly as they chat between themselves.

Her natural hair is bone - straight now; it fans her neck as she leans forward. But then my eyes almost pop out of their sockets as the swell of her breasts become more pronounced.

Yeeee! I'm in trouble!

I'm suddenly excited and tense, both at the same time, boredom a thing of the past. A burst of claps ring out and I turn round to see what's going on. Femi and Fiku are making their way back to their seats. I lift my hands up to clap too and turn interested eyes back to Eve.

She hasn't seen me yet. It would be a surprise to her when she does. Who did she come for? She obviously doesn't know Femi. I'm positive she's here for Fiku.

The MC begins to call on the bridesmaids and groomsmen to come out to dance.

Why now?

I'm determined not to stand up, but Dipo drags me up by the hand. I turn round to glance at Eve but she still hasn't seen me yet.

"Relax, man!" He whispers in my ear. "If I didn't know you well, I'd say you're smitten with her."

For once I have no comeback for him.

We had undergone classes for a choreographed dance for this very moment so it was pretty easy to dance the electric slide dance. You take four steps to the right, then you do the same to the left. You shuffle to the back, and then you do a little twist with your right leg and shuffle to the front. And the process is repeated all over again.

Someone pulls up the bride and groom to join us and not long after, pretty much everyone in the hall joins in, with people doing their own variations. It metamorphoses into the wobbly line dance and more people join in, dancing and wiggling away. I see Chioma angling her way towards me but I slide away to the back.

I look towards the table to see if Eve is still sitting down, but I don't see her, neither do I see her friend, so I keep dancing, keeping an eye out for her. Someone bumps into me and when I turn around, I see Dipo dancing and chatting with Eve. What?!

His hand is around her waist possessively.

They pass me and Eve doesn't even look up at me, her eyes are on Dipo.

Huh?

He smirks as he passes me. I feel like knocking the smirk off his face. I don't even realise I've stopped dancing until some chick with a long weave bumps into me. I mumble a sorry and walk off to sit down.

I watch as practically everyone is wiggling away on the dance floor. I'm getting irritated now. Where the fuck is Dipo? And why is he dancing with Eve?

I begin tapping my hands impatiently on the table.

"Hi baby!" I turn round and see Chioma grinning like a stupid Cheshire cat. She slides into the chair beside me and I turn my head and continue watching out for Eve.

"I see the way you look at her!" She starts.

Excuse me?!

I turn round to look at her once more, a frown on my face. She continues her rant. "You think I didn't notice? You're like a dog in heat," she finishes, frowning heavily. "Now listen to me Segun, don't you dare approach her, otherwise. . ."

"Otherwise what, huh?!" I turn to her fully now. I'm more amused than upset. "Go on, tell me what you're going to do if I 'dare' approach her?" She's breathing heavily now, clearly upset. "Now I want you to watch me walk away from you, fucking psycho." I stand up abruptly and strut off.

I'm quite angry now. Why did I have to get involved with her clingy ass? Because I can't keep it in my pants, that's what! She just won't leave me the fuck alone. The MC announces that people should seat down so other forms of entertainment can take place. As people begin streaming back to their seats, I crane my neck in the hopes of finding Eve, but no such luck. I can't even find Dipo.

Where the fuck are you man?!

I keep looking around for Eve but stop when I sight Dipo talking with her friend in front of the array of food. They're getting something to eat. Brilliant! Now I'll just go ask him where Eve is.

What the heck am I doing?

I halt in my tracks as Chioma's words echo in my mind.

Am I really behaving like a dog in heat?

There are so many beautiful females here, but why Eve?

What's so damn special about her anyway?

I decide to go take a leak instead. When I come back, I'm leaving with Chioma. I remember the red thong she wore last time she was over at my place. Hope she's wearing something just as hot.

I walk out of the tent and head towards the toilet assigned for males. As I round the corner, I hear someone talking, more like begging. "Come on babe, I've already apologised, can't you just forgive me?"

I shake my head.

Some pussy begging a woman, obviously.

I make to continue walking, but then I hear a voice that stops me in my tracks. "Listen, Dee, I'm done. I want you to please leave me alone, I just can't do this anymore." That voice sounds suspiciously like Eve. I move closer, my initial decision forgotten.

"Look here missy, I don't beg no woman, but if I beg you, you'd better damn well feel special." The unknown male voice retorts. I sense bitterness in his words.

Then Eve says something that makes me give her silent thumbs up - she laughs gaily. "Oh! I know I'm special alright, I don't need you or any other male at that, to make me feel so."

There's sudden silence, then I hear a scuffle and I decide it's time to show my face.

What I see makes my blood run cold. He has her by the wrists, holding her captive. One hand is around her neck and she's struggling to get free.

I practically see red.

"Let her go now!" I order, walking closer to them.

"Who the fuck are you?" He spits out venomously. He's still holding tightly unto Eve's wrists and neck and her head is angled unnaturally to the side - clearly, she's in pain. I've got to be careful so he doesn't injure her further. He looks like he could snap her neck without thinking. His eyes are red and bloodshot - he's obviously had too much to drink. Walking closer, I recognise him as Femi's friend. He was one of his groomsmen. That doesn't give him the right to maltreat a woman.

"I'm just a friend," I say, without taking my eyes off him. His lips curl in distaste and he sniggers as he tightens his hold on Eve's neck. She whimpers loudly in pain.

I know for a fact that he's not going to release her until I make my own move.

He doesn't see it coming as I rush towards him - My knee connects with his groin, where it hurts the most. Instantly, he let's go of her and doubles up in pain.

Eve scuttles away from him and I signal her to come to me. She does so, standing behind me and placing a hand on my forearm in a silent thank you. This makes me feel good, but I can't afford to dwell on that now - The bastard has started straightening up. He looks at me and begins to laugh.

"It's because of her? Because of this woman?" He points to Eve standing behind me. "Well, you can have her. You can have my sloppy seconds." He shrugs. Eve gasps. "I'll tell you something man to man - she's not that sweet anyway, so don't bother wasting your time" He sniggers.

I know what he's trying to do. Shame her so he can have the last laugh.

Bloody, fucking coward!

He makes to walk past me but I swing an uppercut at his jaw. He doubles up in pain, yet again, as he holds unto it. Eve gasps and holds unto my hand to stay my movements but I shrug it off.

"Stand up like a man and fight," I taunt, circling him. "Come on little bitch, stand the fuck up!" He comes at me but I move fast on my feet. Years of street fighting as a youth have taught me to anticipate my opponent's move. He swings his arm slowly at me but I dodge it and he hits the air, stumbling forward in the process. "Tsk tsk! Wrong move, buddy. MY TURN!" I swing my right arm with all the force I can muster, and it connects with his nose. The crunch that echoes is sickening, but the scream from him is blood - curdling.

My mind clouds up immediately. You broke three of his ribs! Only animals behave the way you did. You know the rules, yet you chose to flout them. I'm sorry but I'm going to have to expel you!

The memory dissipates and I see Eve standing and staring in horror at him.

He's propped up against the wall. Blood spouts from his nostrils in large spurts. He looks horrifically at the blood that has covered his hands and jacket and he valiantly tries to stem the flow of blood oozing from his broken nose. I'm thinking twenty stitches will do the trick to patch him up but he'll still have a crooked nose after everything.

Eve looks at me with something closely resembling sadness. "You shouldn't have done that." She's shaking, clearly agitated. "You need to leave now, before security comes," She continues.

"We need to leave together. "I'm not leaving you here alone with this maniac. There's no telling what he'll do when I'm gone. Come with me!" I order, taking her hand firmly in mine. She reluctantly takes the hand proffered. As we walk away, I remove my tie with my unoccupied hand and toss it across my shoulder. It was beginning to feel like a noose.

I really need to find Dipo so I can tell him all that happened just now.

We walk back into the tent but I don't see him at the food section. Instead ,I find him sitting at the table, chatting, and eating with Eve's friend. She gasps when she sees Eve. "What happened?" She gets up immediately to go to her, concern written all over her face. I turn my attention to Dipo who is frowning and shaking his head.

"Please, tell me you didn't rape her."

He better have been cracking a joke, otherwise I'll lay one on him too.

I tell him what happened on my way to take a leak and he shakes his head as we both get up. "This is even worse than I thought, but I'll handle it, not to worry. You should take Eve with you. It might get ugly and I wouldn't want her to be at the brunt of his anger."

I nod and turn round to where she and her friend are silently talking. "I'm sorry; we've never really been properly introduced yet." I say, addressing Eve's friend. "My name is Segun," I extend my hand to her and she takes it tentatively with a small smile on her face. She responds by telling me her's.

"I'm really sorry to cut short your conversation with your friend, but there's a situation on ground and we've got to go now." I tell her, a look of remorse on my face. She nods docilely.

"I'll take care of you, don't worry." Dipo comes to stand beside her, snaking a hand round her waist. I lift a brow enquiringly at him and he winks at me.

"Alright, sorry to break this up but we've gotta go," I say, turning to Eve. She nods and I notice she's been crying. She still seems a little shaky and her hair looks to be in a state of disarray from that bastard's manhandling. "Princess! Everything will be fine, please don't cry." I take her hand firmly in mine once more. I give a little wave to Dipo and Ebere as we walk away.

Luckily, we don't encounter Chioma because that would have been another type of drama. She would definitely have caused trouble and I'd prefer to avoid it, rather than act on it. I will never lay a finger on any woman. Years of seeing my mother being manhandled by my dad at a very young age led me to make that decision early on in life.

"I... .I brought my car," she says shakily as we continue walking.

"That's fine. I didn't bring mine, so I'll drive us." I reply, not once stopping in my stride.

When we get to her car, I notice it's small, just the right size for her. She hands me her key wordlessly and I unlock it. I have to pull the seat back to accommodate my whole frame, especially my legs. Eve is obviously smaller than me.

We get strapped in and I drive out through the gate. But once I'm at a safe distance from the wedding venue, I stop the car and turn to her.

"Are you okay?" She's been silent all through. She doesn't answer me. "Princess, please talk to me, I need to know you're okay."

She shakes her head and turns tear - stricken eyes to me. "Why did you . . . did you go that far? Why did you have to break his nose?" It's my turn to remain silent. I turn my gaze back to the road and contemplate how to go about answering her.

"Listen to me! Men like that guy don't respect women. But I'm sure you already knew that. I just wanted to put him in his place and show him he can't treat any woman the way he treated you. It was wrong, and that's why I did it. I know you don't like violence and I know. . . "

She puts a finger on my lips, stopping me from speaking further. She's smiling now and my heart becomes lighter, happier. "Thank you . . . for coming to my aid. I don't know what would have happened to me if you weren't there." She doesn't remove her finger and my tongue darts out involuntarily and licks it. She lets out a little moan and I get an instant boner.

My eyes unknowingly slide to the slit in her dress. It's showing even more skin.

Is she wearing panties? I look away. Down boy, down! You can't think about this, not right now!

Oh, fuck it! Who the hell am I kidding?

It's now or never.

I unbuckle our seat belts and without warning, take her hand and gently guide it to the front of my trousers. "This is what you're doing to me." I tell her in a husky voice.

She doesn't try to move her hand away, neither does she say anything. I'm tightening up harder now and it's getting to the point I hope I won't spill inside my trousers. That would be highly embarrassing.

Control yourself!

I'm breathing so hard right now. She lifts her eyes to me and I see she's breathing just as hard. Next thing I know, we're kissing - tongues and teeth clashing for supremacy. My hands are all over her body, touching, feeling and experiencing her curves and edges. Her hands slide underneath my jacket, making a path way across my chest. She grazes a nipple in the process and I spasm, pleasure uncoiling in my groin.

"Shit! Princess. . ." I stay her hands. "If you keep this up, I will take you right here and now and you won't be able to stop me." I'm so terribly aroused; I'd definitely carry out my threat if she touches me one more time.

She nods and arranges herself as best as she can. Her pink lips are swollen and her eyes look glazed. She looks loved up. I feel a certain pride that I'm the one who made her look this way.

I try my best to get myself under control as I lean my head back against the head rest for a bit. Now I need to take a leak, my bladder is almost bursting. So I get out of the car without even telling her, turning my back to her by the side of the road.

Please tell me she's not peeping at me.

False modesty, I know! I mean she already touched it, so what the heck. When I'm done, I shake off any excess residue and put lil boy back in and zip up.

When I get back to the car, she looks at me coyly. "You're a very bad Nigerian, peeing on the side of the road."

"Sorry, princess, I couldn't keep it in my pants." I wink at her. She doesn't miss the double entendre in my words.

Tension diffused, we joke around with each other as I drive. She's actually easy to talk to which is strange, because she's a woman and I really don't talk with women. I actually prefer them quiet.

But Eve. . . she's different. Maybe if I eventually hit that, I'll become bored and disinterested just like all the other women I've been with.

Something tells me I'm fooling myself. But it's worth the try, at least. Minutes later, I drop her off at home. She sits with me in her car as I wait for the uber I ordered.

We're still talking when my ride shows up. I cup her chin and turn her face towards me, capturing her lips in a soft kiss.

Damn!

These lips have been begging me to kiss them ever since. My gaze slides down to her boobs and I shake my head as I bid her good bye.

As I walk away from her, something odd wraps itself round my heart and squeezes tightly.

Strange!

It gets worse the more I walk away.