Chapter 65
Arjun's Pov:
"You need something I can never give it to you, Arjun. I don't love you. It was never you and will never be. I never wanted you in my life" She said.
It broke my heart to hear that from her, she had said so many cruel things before but now something is different. Maybe that look or I don't know what it is.
Her eyes, it's blank. It's so fucking blank that it didn't fucking showed any emotions on her face.
And it fucking snapped something inside me again that I have been feeling for the last couple of months.
Hurt and Fear!
Fear of losing her again.
Yes, fear of losing her again is my biggest nightmare. I have been there for almost two months since that fateful day.
Even though she was alive she was in coma, it nearly killed me to see her like that. I so badly wanted to look into her beautiful eyes again.
Her eyes! My god!
I gulped hard while closing my eyes, her's would reflect so many emotions on it and I love that even if it's hate I loved it so much.
"Where is he?"
I was that desperate to see her eyes, that I pushed her doctors to edge to do whatever they could do to wake her up, so that I could see her beautiful eyes again, often doctors all can saw some improvements in her body, but just like that it will be gone.
Now that she's here standing infront of me, I looked into her beautiful eyes, as I looked at it.... it hits different.
I opened my mouth to say something but I closed it as I stared at her. Her blank look is killing me and top of that her words stunned me to the core.
I just kept looking at her while thinking.
A frowned itched my face as I saw her look here and there as if she's searching someone. I also saw the way how she completely ignored Raghavi when she tried to talk to her.
I sighed before I could ask her, she beat me with her question. In my peripheral vision I saw Raghavi getting confused by her statement too, but we both chose to ignore her presence.
"Arjun, where's he?" she asked, which made me come out of thoughts.
"Huh?" I was genuinely confused at her question who's she asking about.
Looking at my confused face she looked really annoyed while raising her eyebrows, she asked me again.
"Who?"
A look of disbelief crossed across her face when she heard me "Who? Seriously? Ofcourse my baby! Where's he? Where's my baby?" I heard a gasp behind me, as if she realised whom she was referring too.
My eyes widened at her question, I was too stunned to speak. My eyes moistened unknowingly how could I tell her? How the fuck should I tell her the truth?
Truth about our baby.
I never gave a thought about it.
Too many fucking emotions! All at once!
Fuck.....Fuck...! Fuck! I really didn't thought of how I should convey it to her. I just wanted her senses back that I totally ignored the reality of the consequences.
I'm fucked. I'm royally fucked but how did she know it was he? That was the first question raised in me but before I could ask her anything she started to walk down the stairs hurriedly. I don't want her to get hurt again, so I tried to help her but she kept her hand infront of her stopping me further.
Raghavi tried calling her "Ayla" but she chose to ignore her presence again.
She snapped her head towards me "Arjun, I'm talking to you. Give him to me. I need to hold him. Where's he?" If it was some other time I would have enjoyed the attention she has given me but now I don't feel anything apart from fear and hurt.
I don't fucking know what to say.
I looked here and there to avoid her questions, it hurts more now but she seems restless not knowing ofcourse who wouldn't. She kept asking me the same question again and again.
I closed my eyes in frustration she won't stop asking me until I tell her. Before I would have used forceful way to shut her mouth but now I couldn't able to do anything.
She needs to know the truth.
I opened my eyes while uttering the words.
"He...." I trailed as I looked here and there to avoid her gaze, I couldn't able to form the sentence further "Baby girl... he's..." fuck it's harder than I thought "Shit I mean he was..." I bite my lower lip in frustration.
I took a deep breathe while closing my fist tightly, I looked at her again as I whispered enough for her to hear "Baby, He died"
"Huh?!" She gasped while stumbling which made her lose the hold on the rail but before she can fall I ran and took hold of her in my arms.
As selfishly may it sounds, my god it feels so good to have her back in my arms again.
Her hold on my shirt brought me back to here.
I looked down at her as she trembles uncontrollably, soon tears started to flow down on her cheeks.
"What are you talking about, Arjun?" Her lips quicker while asking me.
I took a deep breathe as I looked at her softly while raising my hand to clear those tears on her cheeks.
"I'm sorry, love. He didn't survived" I closed my eyes miserably as I heard her screaming and I fucking don't know how to comfort her.
"Nooooooooo...!!!" She screamed loudly.
"Noooo....!!! It's a lie...!! Don't fucking lie to me, Arjun" She grabbed my collar angrily while shouting at me.
I tried to calm her down by holding her hands, but she started to beat my chest with her fragile hands all the while crying and screaming in devastation "No... no I don't believe this. You're lying to me" saying that she pointed her finger at me.
She shook her head negatively "My baby is a fighter!!!" She hiccuped while cleaning her face with her hands.
"He's alive" soon her lips trembled as she broke down in my arms.
"Whyyyyy?? Why it has to be my baby boy? Why not me?"
She cried loudly while holding my shirt. It broke my heart to look at her state.
She pushed me away making me stumble back.
I was too stunned to react, but soon I found her slapping her head "It's my fault...!! My fault...!! I killed my baby!!! Oh no..." I looked at her shockingly.
"Ayla, baby girl. Come here" I don't know why she thinks like that. If anyone who's at fault it's mine. I wasn't there to check up on her. It's not her fault to begin with how should I tell her that.
I tried to take her back in my arms, but she pushed me again, holding her head she gasped saying "I killed him, Arjun" her eyes widened at her own statement while looking at me.
"Oh my god...!! I killed my own son" she sat down on the stairs with a thud.
Before I could hold her she passed out.
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