Chapter 66 Daze

<Mia>

We are here in the hospital garden, where there's a coffee shop.

I'm not comfortable talking to her, just the two of us. I still haven't forgotten everything that happened back then.

"How are you? Do you know that ever since you and my son parted ways, he changed. I thought I did the best for my son, but apparently not," she began.

"Aren't you angry with me anymore?" I asked gently, trying not to offend her.

"I regret what I did to you back then," I was surprised when she held my hand.

"You were his happiness, but I separated the two of you. I thought my son had a bad influence. He didn't want to listen to me to study in another country. Now, I think I'm being punished for what I did before. My son still hasn't woken up, and we don't know who did this to him," she said tearfully.

Wait a moment. I'm taken aback by what my mother is saying.

"How have you been, my dear?"

"I'm okay, Mom."

"I heard about your businesses. Maybe if I didn't separate you back then, your parents might be my business partners now," she said with a smile.

I just smiled at her faintly. I'm not comfortable, and I'm assessing her demeanor. It's not easy to forget what she did to me before.

"I'm married now, and I'm happy with my life. Before, I used to question why things happened the way they did between Dashie and me, and in past relationships. Turns out, life would give me my husband," I said with a light smile.

She just smiled at me, and we continued to talk about her life with Dashie. I'm no longer bitter about life. I'm content with Ethan.

"Can you visit my child often? I'm just hoping it might be a reason for him to wake up," she pleaded with hope and sadness in her voice.

I don't feel anything for her child anymore, and the one I love is the person beside me now.

"Okay," I quickly replied. I hadn't visited in a while. It's also my way of helping, and Dashie has become a part of my life in some way.

After our conversation, we returned to the hospital. She went back alone as my husband was already looking for me, as if I had disappeared.

He greeted me with a furrowed brow and a scowl.

"Doc," I called to him and hugged him.

"Where have you been?" he asked rudely. He hugged me too, taking a whiff of my scent. Thankfully, I still smelled fresh.

"Daddy!"

I let go of the hug.

"Daddy!" shouted a tall young boy. He was wearing pants, a polo shirt, and even a vest. He's so cute.

"Daddy! I miss you," the child said and hugged Ethan.

Then I saw a woman leaning against the door. She was wearing glasses and had a bag with her, like the one a child would use. I looked back at Ethan and the child. They seemed happy together. The child also resembled him.

Is he her child? My heart raced at that thought. How did he have a child with someone else? When did he hide this from me?

"Wife, meet my son Etheus," Ethan introduced me with a smile, while I didn't know how to react.

"Why do you have another wife? Shouldn't Mommy be the wife?" the child innocently asked him and let go of his hand.

"Ethan, Etheus wants to go to the inflatable play area and he wants you to come with him," the woman said. She looks familiar to me.

"Ethues says you should say hi to your wife first, daddy."

Hold on a moment. Hold on.

"Hello," the child politely greeted me with a smile. He looks like Ethan when he smiles.

"I'll explain it later," Ethan whispered to me as he approached.

"Joy, you can bring his things to the sofa. You can leave," Ethan told the woman.

"Is she Etheus' mother?" I asked trembling, but I could still manage.

"Yes. He's our child, mine and Ethan's," Joy answered, even though I wasn't asking her. She's being meddlesome!

"Wife…" Ethan said and reached for my hand, but I pulled away.

Why did he want to have a child with me when he already has a child with someone else? Did Ethan cheat on me throughout our marriage? Did he get Joy pregnant and only tell me now?

Is this my karma catching up with me?

Why is it that just when I started loving him, I find out that he got someone else pregnant? The child is already quite big, and it looks like in our first year of marriage, he had already impregnated someone. Maybe that's why he neglected my desires before, because he knew he had done something wrong.

My heart is tightening. Each beat feels like a painful throb.

I don't want to love anymore. I always end up getting hurt. Everyone I love manages to hurt me.

I'll cry later.

"Ethan, can I come with you? Ethues might look for me. He can't sleep without me. I don't have anything else to do," Joy said with a smile.

"I borrowed my son to introduce him to my wife, why do you need to go with us?" Ethan snapped at her.

Joy's smile faded, but she remained composed and flirtatious.

"Our child isn't used to not seeing me," she insisted.

"Mommy, I can call you if I ever miss you. And I miss my dad so much," the child responded to her.

Please note that while I have provided the translation, certain nuances and cultural subtleties from the original text might still be lost in translation.

"But, Etheus, don't you not want to be away from mommy?"

Why is this woman persisting? I'm starting to want to glare at her, but I remain calm.

"This is our family bonding, and I don't need an assistant. My wife can be a mother to my son. You can go home, Joy," Ethan said seriously to her. He's already sent her away twice. This woman has some nerve.

Joy's face looked like that of a puppy, and she couldn't do anything but leave.

"Is he the one you wanted to introduce to me?" I pointed to the child.

"Ethan, you said you love me, right? Then why did you get another woman pregnant? I thought you loved me. If you truly loved me, you wouldn't have done this. Just when I started loving you, this is how it turns out. Don't I deserve to be happy, huh? I thought you were different from everyone else."

I'm holding back tears in front of him. Crying now has its time and place.

His expression became even more serious.

"I'm sorry. Ethues was born when we weren't married, and I want you to know all the important people in my life. I thought you'd be happy. My son is my child with another woman through in vitro fertilization. Joy begged me to donate my semen because she wants a son. She just wants to spend her life with a child. As a friend, I granted her wish. Except for your son, my son gave me a world. Wife, please don't divorce me. If I knew we would get married, I wouldn't have agreed with Joy about donating my semen," he explained at length. This is the first time Ethan has spoken at length. Usually, he's concise.

"What?" I asked.

He just nodded at me.

"Nothing happened between me and Joy. Etheus is a product of in vitro fertilization," he repeated to prevent my tears from falling.

"I thought something happened between the two of you! Do you still love me? And why did you only tell me about this now?"

"Our marriage was rocky, and I love you, always."

He moved closer to me and cupped my face.

"I want you to trust me. I won't do things that would make you sad or hurt you. I know I'm not perfect, but I can assure you that I will take care of your heart. I'll make a lot of mistakes and stupid things in the future, but my love for you won't change."

I'm in tears because of his words. I can feel his love in every word he says.

"Daddy, I want to eat," the child said.

We both turned to the child.

"Can you love and accept my son?" he asked, looking into my eyes.

Can I accept his child?

"Yes," I answered, even though I'm not sure.

The three of us went out to eat, and Etheus was so lively.

"Daddy, can I stay in your house with mommy?" Ethues asked as we were heading home. He's full of energy, and he never runs out of stories.

Ethan looked at me, but I avoided his gaze.

"We're living under the same roof, with your mommy Zoey."

"How about my real mommy?" Ethan asked sadly.

"Ethan, there are things that you haven't understood. When you grow older, you'll understand why I have my wife," he said.

"Okay..." he said with a sigh, "I want to see my mommy, but since I'm not always seeing you, I want to be with you. Daddy, why can't the two people I love be together? I want you and mom to be together."

My chest tightens from what the child is saying.

"Etheus, aren't you feeling sleepy?" Ethan changes the topic.

It seems like the child doesn't like me. Well, I don't like him either! Mindset, right?

"I'll wake you up when we get home."

"But I don't want to sleep. I don't feel sleepy after all. I have a lot of questions running in my mind and you don't want to answer them," he pouted.

Ethan sighed and took out his cellphone.

"Here's my cell phone, do whatever you want, just don't open my messages."

When the child took his iPhone, he grabbed my hand and kissed it.

"Wife, are you okay? You've been silent," he said, concerned.

"I'm just tired," I said briefly to cut the conversation short. I don't want to talk to him right now because I still can't believe that he has a child with another woman, even though he says the child is a product of in vitro fertilization. And why is he still able to be with that woman? Were they previously in a relationship?

Who am I overthinking for? I'm also afraid to ask Ethan. I'm scared of what I might find out.

On the drive, the child fell asleep while Ethan and I remained quiet. When we arrived home, I let him take care of his child. After all, it's his child with another woman.

He already has a child with someone else, so why doesn't he just marry her? Why does he want to have a child with me?

"Wife, can we talk?" Ethan asked me gently.

"I'm tired. Let's talk another day," I said coldly, avoiding eye contact with him.

He held my arm.

"We will talk," he said firmly.

"There's nothing to talk about, Ethan," I blocked him.

His forehead creased.

"I knew it. You're mad," he said seriously.

"You already know why, so why are you asking? Leave me alone, Ethan, I need to change," I said sharply to him, glaring.

"I thought we were okay about this matter?" His question was puzzled.

"And now you're angry," I retorted.

"Is it wrong to be angry?"

"Can you stop talking nonsense, Mia? You're always angry. I know you're mad, and I don't know what you're mad about. You've been distant from me," he said in frustration.

"Ask Joy about that," I said sarcastically.

"Why is Joy part of our conversation?" He asked clueless.

Sometimes Ethan can be so clueless.

"I don't want to talk to you. You're just making my blood boil even more," I said irritably.

He wiped his face with his hand.

"You're mad because I have a son? Wife, I thought you'd understand, and I explained it earlier. You're my wife, you should understand."

"You're my husband, you should think and consider my feelings! You already have a child, why do you want to have a child with me?! Why don't you just leave me and marry Joy! After all, you already have a child with her!" I couldn't stop myself from shouting in anger. He also seems shocked by my outburst.

"Did you love her, huh?"

He looked stressed by my words.

"Fuck!" He said in frustration.

"Don't you trust me, huh?"

"Ask that to the dog!" I snapped back and turned away from him. I entered the restroom and heard a knock.

"Wife, can we talk about it in a calm way?" He calmly asked while knocking.

"I don't want to see you or talk to you. My blood is boiling because of you!" I yelled and didn't listen to him anymore.

After finishing a half bath, he was sitting on the bed, looking like he was waiting. He still wasn't dressed.

I raised an eyebrow as our eyes met.

"I'm sorry if I agree with my friend Joy. If I knew you'd feel like this, I wouldn't have done it. I regret it. And I never loved her. It hurts that you don't trust me. You're acting differently, Mia. If you don't want to talk and see me, I'll grant your wish. I'm getting tired of this, too, Mia. I'm getting tired of trying to understand you. I'm doing everything I can. I thought you'd understand me. I was happy when I was planning to introduce you to my son. Both of you are the highlights of my world," he said, his voice pained.

"I'll give this night to you," he said without looking at me, and then he left.

I sat down on the floor and burst into tears.

I can't understand myself either. I don't know what I want. I'm confused about everything.