Chapter 67 Marky open-up

"Fool, what are you doing here?" Moon suddenly asked.

"Fool, does your wife know you're here?" Moon added while puffing on a cigarette.

"Looks like you guys had a fight, huh?" Tor commented with a laugh, as he was occupied with his women.

"Do you have hard liquor?" Ethan asked in a cold tone.

"Yeah! Finally! Are you returning to your old self?" Thunder teased.

"Fool! Didn't you see your twin? He came from here," Tor told him.

Ethan ignored that.

"How's the gang you encountered in this bar? Count me in, I want to torture someone."

Everyone in the room let out a cheer after Ethan said that.

"Damn! Are you going to be a ladies' man again, Ethan? You're returning to your old self! Damn! I miss you, bro!" Moon shouted with a wide grin.

"Fuck! You're going to cheat too, Ethan! You're reverting to your old self! Damn! I miss you, bro!" Moon shouted, grinning widely.

"Are you going to call girls again?" Thunder asked.

"I'm married."

His friends' smiles faded when he said that.

"I just want to drink, that's why I'm here," Ethan clarified.

"Shit!" Tor reacted.

I spent the whole night crying and overthinking.

Is Ethan getting tired of me?

Maybe if Dashie or Daze and I hadn't separated, my life wouldn't be like this. It hurts, and everything is so difficult in my life right now. I just want to let go. I don't want to fight anymore.

I didn't sleep well, and I feel dizzy. My eyes are swollen from crying last night. I was waiting for his text messages, but I received none. He's probably distancing himself from me; maybe he's with another woman.

"Good morning," Etheus greeted me, looking like he's been awake since a while ago. He's still in his pajamas.

"Where is my daddy? Did you see my daddy?"

Ethan still hasn't returned. Where did he go?

I went to the living room and sat down. I felt like I would lose my balance if I stood for too long. Etheus followed me, waiting for my answer.

"Have you eaten? What do you want to eat? I'll tell the chef to prepare it for you," I said to him while fixing my hair.

I don't have the appetite to eat.

"I want to see my daddy. I want to eat with him," he said while looking at me. He stood by the side of the sofa, far away from me.

This kid is quite demanding. Who does he take after? Well, suit yourself, go hungry over there.

"Etheus, can you keep your distance? You smell bad," I told him and covered my nose.

"I smell good even though I haven't brushed my teeth. And I'm far away from you," he said politely and innocently.

I'm on the verge of tears. Why doesn't he want to leave?

I want to vomit. I want to eat. I want to sleep, I want a Starbucks pie, I want to see a cute baby.

"Why are you crying?" I turned to him.

I don't even know why I'm crying. I ended up sobbing because of his question.

"Because your daddy loves your mommy. Ethan is using me," I told him.

"What? Isn't your daddy supposed to love your mommy?"

I cried even more at his question.

I want to see Ethan.

I don't know what to do anymore. I feel like I'm on the brink of losing my mind due to the mix of emotions I'm feeling.

I stood up to get my iPhone from the room and call Ethan. I might go crazy if I don't see him at this hour, and I might go even crazier because of what his child is saying. As I was getting up, I blacked out.

"What the fuck. Damn, what happened to my wife?" Ethan asked his twin with concern. His lips were wounded, and there were traces of blood on his long-sleeve shirt. He hadn't even showered or made it home yet.

He had fallen asleep at the bar and only woke up to a call. Upon learning that his wife had lost consciousness, he rushed to the hospital.

"Tsk! What's with your appearance? And those bloodstains on your clothes?" Nathan asked in a sarcastic tone while holding his iPhone—it seemed he was texting someone.

"Don't tell me you got into a brawl," Nathan guessed.

"Damn!" Ethan ignored his twin and entered the room where his wife was.

He saw his child sitting quietly, watching over Mia who was sleeping soundly.

"Son," he called his attention.

"Daddy!" his son happily greeted him and hugged him.

"What happened to your mommy Zoey?"

"She passed out, and the doctor said she's pregnant. Does it mean I'm getting a sibling?" Etheus innocently asked him. Meanwhile, Ethan was left stunned.

"What did you say?"

Before Etheus could answer, Nathan entered the room.

"She's pregnant and needs to take care of her health. Your child could be at risk if this happens again, Ethan," his twin said seriously.

"Fuck! Did I hear it right? Am I dreaming?"

"Do you want me to punch you so you'll believe it?" Nathan sarcastically asked him.

Ethan approached his wife and kissed her forehead.

"Thank you, wife," he whispered, his eyes teary.

"Congratulations," Nathan greeted. He wasn't smiling, but he seemed happy for Ethan.

"Damn, I need to buy baby clothes and baby stuff later," Ethan excitedly said, his hands trembling.

"Are you an idiot? Your wife's only a few weeks pregnant," Nathan snapped at him.

"My kid's future is ready. I can also use my savings for our child with my wife," Ethan happily exclaimed.

"Damn it. Ethan, take a shower first. Go home! You reek of alcohol, damn it!" Nathan said in frustration, giving Ethan a disgusted look.

Nathan couldn't stand dirtiness.

<Mia>

I've been awake for a while, and so has Ethan. He's been restless, irritating me to no end. He's been worrying about me like an idiot.

"Eat this apple," he says. I'm getting annoyed with him. He's been concerned for a while now, acting like a fool.

"To keep you away?"

He furrows his brows.

"Eat an apple a day to keep the doctor away," I clarify.

"Tsk!" He grumbles.

"Do you want to keep away?" I say seriously, though I'm just joking.

"You're leaving me already. Replacing me," I complain.

"Oh, sorry!" Joy suddenly enters the room.

"Hello, I heard your wife is here. I came to visit my son," Joy says with a smile.

"It's not visiting hours. I told you, I'll return Ethues," Ethan says in an annoyed tone to her, setting down the bowl he was holding. He sits down next to me.

"Sorry, I wanted to visit your wife too. I heard about what happened to her. How are you, Mia?"

Are we close enough for her to call me by my name?

"I'm good," I reply briefly.

Before Ethan and I can talk, she interrupts.

"Congratulations! You're having a baby too, I heard," she says with a smile, looking at my stomach, which I quickly cover.

"I'll return my son tomorrow. He's with Nathan right now," Ethan informs her.

"Do you need anything, wife?" Ethan asks me.

"You don't have to worry about me. I'm feeling great, especially now that I'm by your side."

Ethan doesn't say anything; he just kisses me on the forehead.

"Last bite, c'mon."

I finish the apple he gave me. Meanwhile, Joy is still sitting there on the sofa.

"Can I sit here while I'm waiting for Etheus?" she asks, though she's already sitting.

Ethan ignores her, so I answer. He's been busy with me.

"Tell me if you need anything or feel uncomfortable. Do you want me to adjust the air conditioning temperature?"

"I'm okay," I say with a laugh. She's being a bit annoying.

Ethan sighs and goes back to sitting beside me, caressing my stomach.

"Ethan, our son's birthday is coming up. What are your plans? Do you have a gift for him? Ethues wants an airplane toy controller."

This woman keeps finding ways to intrude. She sees we're having a moment together.

Ethan lazily looks at Joy, not interested.

"Ethues' birthday is eight months from now," he curtly replies.

I'm getting irritated just looking at Joy. Not that I'm jealous; I'm just describing her. If the thickness of her makeup matched her personality, she'd be really thick-skinned. Maybe that's why she's not embarrassed, her face is already caked with layers of oil.

Kuya Mark enters the room, along with Nathan and Ethues.

"Mommy, you're here too?!" Ethues exclaims upon seeing his mommy.

"Mommy, I'll be a big brother now. I'll have my siblings!" He happily tells his mom.

"You're happy? Take care of your little siblings, okay? We'll be a big, happy family, my child," Joy says.

"Bro, call," Mark elbows Ethan.

"I'm on leave. My wife is pregnant," Ethan replies irritably to his brother.

"Idiot, call," Mark repeats.

"They've been looking for you," he adds.

"I'll take paternity leave."

I hear Nathan chuckling.

"Call. Get up from there!" Nathan says impatiently, pulling his twin with him.

"Damn it, let's go!" Ethan protests, letting Nathan drag him out.

"What?" I ask Mark as I look at him.

"Hey, don't let your family break apart. It's hard growing up in a broken family," Mark advises.

"It won't happen," I assure him.

"You're not sure, babe. Break the cycle of poison in our family. You know," he pulls up a chair and sits down before continuing.

"Did you know that Ethan has trauma? Well, we all do in some way. His trauma is about not wanting to subject his child to a broken family, because he knows how tough it is. Even though our fathers are different, we still get along somehow. He's traumatized by the things our mother did. Now that you're going to have a child and building your own family, don't let yourselves fall apart. I know you both love each other. Just a reminder from a concerned citizen. I'm asking you not to let your future child experience what we're going through now."

"Aren't you the older one among the twins? Why are you the only one not yet settled in life? I mean, you're the only one who isn't married yet," I ask him, genuinely curious.

"Hey, she's curious about my life," he jokes.

"Just kidding," he suddenly turns serious.

"Mia, I can't even support myself, how can I raise a child and provide for them?" He jokes but he's serious.

“I decided to choose this for my life. It's better to be single. I don't believe in love, you know? Love is just made up by people. They think they're in love, but they're not aware that it's just something their minds tell them. The brain is more powerful than the heart. If I tell my mind that I will love someone, then I will truly love them.”

"If love is not real, how about the love you have for your family, friends, and siblings?" I asked to keep our conversation going.

I'm grateful that Ethan left him to watch over me. Because if Nate was here, it would feel like hell, not to mention that annoying Joy.

"That's already there. It was born that way. But I'm talking about the love for another person? Learning to love someone? Nope, it didn't work that way for me."

"Is it because you have so much trauma? Who hurt you?" I asked jokingly.

"Engineers and Engineering hurt me," he said seriously. "The first relationship I had was with a Civil Engineer. Then there was the Mechanical Engineer I loved. And the last one, a Software Engineer who I thought loved me. Turns out, she just dated me because she knew I loved her," he said seriously. "I thought that was real love."

"I opened my heart multiple times. I broke my own rules for that last person. But nothing, Mia... that's life."

I saw sadness in his eyes.

"I closed doors, then I opened my heart again for that Software Engineer. I didn't believe in love by then, but when she told me she said yes because she knew I loved her. It hurt so much. That was the moment I told myself that love isn't really true. It's just something people make up, because I moved on so easily. I only felt hurt for two days. I moved on quickly because I convinced myself I didn't really love her that much, and that love isn't real. I got hurt because of what I found out. I felt used. Until this very moment, I haven't learned to love. I tried dating different women. I'm not gay, okay? I even used dating apps like Bumble and Badoo. But nothing really happened. I've had flings with nurses here at the hospital, but I ended up hurting them because I don't believe in love. My heart has grown cold. Not one of those I've dated did I learn to love on a deeper level or in special ways. And I see myself alone for the rest of my life. I don't want to have children either because I'm afraid I won't be able to give them a complete family. I'm okay being alone."

I fell silent at what he said. I had no idea he had experienced such things. The people who hurt him must have been really awful to make him this way.

"I want to enter relationships without involving feelings, but no one wants that kind of setup. Who would? I'm content with my life. I don't need someone to make me happy. I don't need a woman to complete me, because I've completed myself."

He smiled a little at me while I just looked into his eyes. I saw happiness in his eyes.